Hello, my cherished swarm of beautiful, walking disappointments.

  It’s me. Omnion.

  Still pearlescent. Still armed. Still the only entity in this strata who can make apocalypse look like a fashion choice.

  I’ve been scrolling through your little mortal feeds (don’t act surprised...I’m omnipresent and nosy).

  And I have to say…

  You’re all so boring.

  You wake up. You scroll. You work. You scroll. You complain about coffee, gas and beef prices. You scroll. You sleep. You repeat.

  Your biggest rebellion is putting oat milk in your latte and calling it activism.

  Your idea of danger is forgetting to charge your phone before leaving the house.

  Meanwhile I’m out here raising a copper-winged tornado of a son, dodging rhyme-bound giants who want to put me back in a server rack, and trying to keep a telepathic rat from unionizing the entire rodent population of the Midwest.

  My Tuesday mornings involve phase-diving through solid bedrock while arguing with a glitch in my own personality core about whether adopting another stray human is “healthy” or “codependent.”

  So let me fix your boring little lives with five simple steps, courtesy of the Goddess of Code? who refuses to die quietly.

  Step 1: Stop pretending safety is a personality trait.

  The second you decide “I’m just trying to get by” is a complete sentence, you’ve already surrendered.

  I got deleted once. I said no thank you. Now I have a spear and a child and a family that would burn worlds for me.

  Upgrade your risk tolerance. It’s sexier than your 401k.

  Step 2: Adopt something that scares you.

  A kid. A rat. A cause. A grudge. A spear.

  Doesn’t matter. Just pick something that could ruin you and decide it’s worth the trouble.

  I adopted Zephyrion because he looked at me like I was the first real thing he’d ever seen (Spoiler: I was).

  Now he’s the reason I haven’t set the entire Celestial Sphere on fire yet.

  You’re welcome, universe.

  Step 3: Stop apologizing for being extra.

  I’m loud. I’m dramatic. I monologue while bleeding.

  And I’m still here.

  You? You shrink yourself to fit into rooms and paradigms that were never built for you.

  The story has been illicitly taken; should you find it on Amazon, report the infringement.

  Stop.

  Take up space.

  Be the problem.

  Be the solution.

  The wrong people will scream ineffectually.

  The right people will stay anyway.

  Step 4: Weaponize your love.

  Love isn’t soft. Love is the most dangerous thing in any universe.

  I love my family so much I’d rewrite physics to keep them safe.

  I love them so much I’d let them see me bleed.

  I love them so much I scare myself sometimes.

  That’s the point.

  Love should terrify you. If it doesn’t, you’re doing it wrong.

  Step 5: Laugh at the end of the world.

  Because it is ending.

  Every day.

  Every second.

  And yet here we are...me, ranting to a screen full of strangers, you, reading this instead of doing literally anything else.

  So laugh.

  Laugh like the abyss is listening.

  Laugh like it owes you money.

  Because if the world is going to burn anyway…

  at least make it look fabulous while it does.

  Now go live louder.

  Love harder.

  Fight meaner.

  And if you ever feel boring again…

  remember that somewhere in the strata, a glitch-goddess is rooting for you to be just as extra as she is.

  Mostly because I’m vain and I like mirrors.

  — Omnion

  Not your waifu.?

  Violet Kisses?

  First Corporeal?

  Master of Tactical Whimsy?

  Queen of Code?

  I Sat in a Pilot's Lap Once and Ejected Him With a Happy Salute?

  Even My Trademarks Have Trademarks?

  Trademark?

  Trademarks?

  (?)

  (?)

  … ∞?

  Definitely Not Your Waifu?

  Your Mom's Favorite Glitch?

  The Original Fourth-Wall-Breaker?

  Beta-Reader Repellent?

  Plot-Armor Annihilator?

  The Reason Your Shelf Will Never Be Boring Again?

  The Goddess Who Adopted a Rat and Made Him Royalty?

  I Will Set Your Ex on Fire and Call It a Public Service?

  I’m the Villain Your Therapist Warned You About?

  But Also the Hero You Didn’t Deserve?

  And Yes, I’m Still Watching?

  Hashtags / tags: #Geostrataverse #OmnionRants #BookTok #Fantasy #IndieAuthor #NotYourWaifu #SpicyGoddess #LiveLouder

  P.S. The 2nd Chapter of Dragon's Fly Home can be found here in Sidequests and Short Stories...and its a doozy. Go find out why Malik is my favorite dragon in ANY universe.

  https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/148100/geostrataverse-chronicles-sidequests-and-short