Issue 6: The Tournament PT I

  It showed Jam walking to a place where there were a lot of cheetahs. "Ugh, gregariousness disgust me." and he saw the referee. "WELCOME TO CHEETAH POWER TOURNAMENT! THE WINNER WILL GET 100 BUFFALOES!" And Jam looked up at the top of the colosseum and he saw Death. ANY LAST ENTRIES? Jam and a random blue and yellow cheetah named Salar said "Me" at the same time with the exception that Jam called the referee a ghost beard. And they both looked at each other. And the referee welcomed them in. "May I have your names?" The referee asked them. "Salar." Salar answered to him. "Jam, you inexcusable geometrically fusable highly unusual delusional fool!" Jam said to him. The referee's jaws was on the ground. "Idiot why do you have multiple jaws?" Jam asked him. And then the Referee sent them to the waiting room and Salar looked at Jam and Jam said "Does these meticulously ridiculous ,hideous, typical, idiots think putting us in a room will delay the death of my oppositions? Jam said. "New here?" Salar said to him. "Of course, I don't surround myself around garrulous crowds and expect praise just because I defeated some insignificant failures. "I feel you, I don't do it for praise but to establish my name, gain respect. My goal one day is to become a Honor Hunter, not for praise but for myself identification." Salar said to him and Jam nodded. "Don't think that this conversation will higher your chance of my salvation, 'Salar,' You hunchback orangutan!" Jam said sardonically and Salar answered him. "Heh, likewise!" And just as that was said, they could hear the referee's voice on the crystal speaker. "ALRIGHT, FIRST BATTLE WILL BE: SENO VS TAUKA! Seno walked out and Tauka went to the other side and then they watched through the window but Jam said that Seno and Tauka were too ugly to look at so he just listened. And then the referee counted down. "3...2..1. GO!" And just like that Seno and Tauka dashed towards each other and then Seno used Sprint claw, It's an ability that even a normal cheetah could acquire but It's like the "Kung fu" for cheetahs. He dashed and clawed Tauka but Tauka shrugged it off and he used sharp tail and he sliced his tail on Seno but seno grabbed his tail and through him high into the air and started cheering. Salar looked at Jam, "Watch this." And as Seno was thrown into the air, a giant "Poof" happened in the sky like red smoke, indicated that he exploded but just as Tauka was about to celebrate, Seno dived down as a red behemoth cheetah and eviscerated him to a million pieces. "WOAHHHH!" And the crowd goes loud. "DID YOU SEE THAT?" The referee screams in shock. Jam looked at him. "I would've caught that from a universe away, you sea-washed garden gnome!" and the referee said "OBVIOUSLY, THE WINNER IS...SENO!" And Seno was cheering. And Jam said to Salar. "Fool is praising him self, that's contradictive to our criteria, you dietary pioneer horse ear!." Salar was dying of laughter. "What are these roasts?' Jam answered broquesly, "The truth, you enzymatic ox beard!" And Salar started dying of laughter. "Idiot, how am I already winning against you? Idiot is gonna die before we even fight, you bisexual snapping turtle." He finally stopped laughing. "That's if we even make it to the finish line." He said to Jam. "I will, maybe not you, you camel nut!" Jam responded. "Ahaha, alright buddy." He joked with Jam. "SALAR VS KONALO!" The Referee screamed. "I hate this obnoxious bullet chin." Jam complained. And then Salar and Konalo arrived to the battle field and was looking at eachother. Konalo was growling and glaring at Salar. Salar looked at him. "Just because I am gonna end you doesn't mean you have to growl at me." Konalo ran towards Salar and used Wood Chop but Salar sent 33 stones to smack him from all sides and he knocked him to the clouds and dashed up there and slammed him to the ground and sent a giant stone and blasted it down and destroyed him and Salar landed on the ground. "That was easier than I expected." Salar said condescendingly. And Jam looked at him. "Don't get cocky, you lethargic turkey." And Salar laughed. The referee looked in shock. "I WASN'T EVEN FINISHED WITH MY COUNTDOWN!" He yelled. "ANYWAYS WHO IS READY FOR ROUND 3?" suddenly a cheetah walked up to Salar and Jam. "I am so scared, I don't want to lose!" He said shaking. Jam looked at him. "Stop being a wuss, you zebra chest!" Salar looked at him. "Why are you here then?" "To impress a girl." He said looking down. Jam looked at him judgmentally but Salar walked to him. "That's why you're here? To impress a girl? That is the reason why you are so weak, It's because you don't actually want to do this. How many fights have you been in your life? He asked. "I-I've never been in a fight." The Cheetah said. "It's okay, this will be your first win. What's your name?" Before he could speak. "KAZAR VS LUKILA!" The referee screamed. And then Kazar looked at them. "Gulp, I am next. I am Kazar." Kazar said to them shakingly. Salar patted his back. "You got this, now go get cooked. I mean cook." Jam looked at him. "This helicopter wig is gonna lose, you indestructible but corruptable butt cable!" Jam roasted. And then Kazar walked out trepidatiously and then Lukila came running from the other side and he roared at Kazar. Kazar trembled but then he saw the girl smiling and waving and he smiled. Lukila noticed. "3...2..1. GO!" The ref screamed as Lukila ran towards Kazar. And then Lukila used Gravel punch and knocked Kazar across the colosseum and ran towards him. Kazar ducked and ran away. People were laughing at Kazar. "WAIT!" Kazar yelled but then Lukila used Gravel blast and blasted him to a wall and he jumped at Kazar and tore him apart. "WOOAAHHH!" Everybody said except for Jam and Salar and Salar looked down. "YEAHHH!" Lukila yelled in excitement! He ran to the girl and claimed her. And Kazar saw and his eyes closed and then the moon flew over and his hands clenched and he started to roar and grow darker and Lukila and the girl looked at him and he regenerated everything and roared loudly and he stood on his hind legs! And he grew to about 8 feet tall. They all were shocked. Jam was not phased but Salar was bunglefutted. "You got this!" He screamed. And then Kazar was quicker than light and knocked Lukila deep into the ground and smacked him into the clouds and he flew up and his eyes turn into moons and he grew two moons in his hands that were the size of mountains and he crushed them on lukila and then he knocked him to the moon and on the moon he could run as fast as a God Cheetah, so he used that to his advantage and rushed through his existence 9000000000 times and then knocked him towards Cheetah Power with moon fist and knocked him to dust so hard that even his spirit got fractured and faded. And he roared. "YEAH!" Salar screamed and dashed to him and Jam walked towards him. Kazar looked at them. "I DID IT!" And he was jumped up and down. Salar looked at Jam. "What do you have to say?" He asked. "I never stopped unbelieving in him,His face looked like a imprisoned horsetongue while he was fighting that loser. Imagine losing to something like this." Jam said in a monotone voice and he looked at Jam. And the girl ran to Kazar. "THAT WAS SO AMAZING!" She yelled. Kazar looked at her and she grabbed his face and tried to kiss him but he de-boned her and knocked her out of the world and her hair slapped the floor. "Go meet your husband, you leech sucking, strength digger!" He smiled. Jam was not impressed but he gave him ever slight respect after that and lessened the absurdity of his roasts towards him. And then it was Jam's turn to go, he was gonna go against a Cheetah named Maximus. "MAXIMUS VS JAM!" And Jam was circling him and so was Maximus. "You're finished, guardian." Maximus said to Jam but Jam glared at him. "Silence, Optimus Not In His Prime." Maximus scoffed and the referee said "Go" and Maximus used Energy pulse and blasted it towards Jam but Jam ran through and used Spike sling and threw a spike boulder but then Maximus used his shield but Jam broke through it! "HOW?" Maximus screamed before being launched into the sun in multiple pieces and is presumed dead. "WOAHH! THE WINNER IS JAM!" And just as he had said that, the God Cheetahs showed up. "WE HAVE THE GOD CHEETAHS HERE!" And everyone was cheering except for Jam, Kazar and Salar. Jam immediately went back into the waiting room and Dirus, a cheetah whose won all of the tournaments he's been in looked at Jam. "Interesting, the barking dog actually won. I guess you are more bite than you are bark." Jam looked at him. "Shut up or I will put you in the waiting room but for a different reason. You sanctimonious unceremonious acrimonious erroneous babylonius fist baloney wrist!" And he looked at Dirus and Dirus lifted his hands sarcastically, acting as if he was gonna get shot. "I am so scared." Dirus said. "I don't care about your feelings, you camel spit, sandal rip, candle lit, head is built like a banana split, Santa lip looking piece of garbage." The ref interrupted "DIRUS VS SENI!" Dirus looked at Jam. "Looks like I have someone to split in half." and he ran out and saw his opponent looked at him. "GO!" And then they started fighting and Seni used Legendary claw blast and threw it at him but Dirus didn't move and he let it hit him. And then smoke cleared and he smirked. Seni was shocked and Dirus rocketed after him and used Blast punch and knocked him across the field and he blasted right behind him and caught him and he used used blast drill and it blasted through him 4000 times and he knocked him into the air and used Blast Disintergration and disintergrated him. He landed on the ground and smiled at Jam. Jam looked down... because he saw an ant yelling at him and he blew it out of proportion and when Jam looked up again, Dirus was infront of him smiling, menacingly. Jam was not phased, more so concerned because of his smell. "SENO VS SALAR!" Referee yelled. Kazar looked at Salar. "Good luck." Salar looked at him, "I got this." He said confidently but Jam looked at him. "Treasure chest neck." Jam said as Salar walked on the battlefield. "3...2..1. GO!" And then Salar and Seno started running towards eachother and started fighting. Seno used Pop Punch and tried to punch him in the face and then Salar caught his fist and used stone breaker and broke his jaw and knocked him into the air and made rocks wrap around him and then slammed him on the ground and turned a ginormous rock into a spear and jab him to the ground and sent a boulder down to him but he popped it out of existence and he popped behind him and used pop pressure blast and knocked Salar into the air. "COME ON!" Kazar yelled. And Salar summoned 900 rocks into the air and spun it around him and made it all collide and destroyed him and he landed on the ground. And everyone except for Jam and Dirus cheered. Salar walked proudly and went to Jam and Kazar. "Lightwork." But Jam immediately cut him off. "You got hurt, you are garbage." Jam said in a stoic way. "Oh wow really?" He said to Jam. Referee yelled "NOW, KAZAR VS JAM!" Kazar looked at Jam. "Crap." Jam looked at him. "Why are you shocked? There were 6 entries and 3 of them happen to have some sense of mutuality. You dingle berry head! Jam answered him. "Jam, are we friends?" He asked. Jam looked at him. "The chances of you being my friend is as close as you winning this fight, impossibly low. I will only be your friend if you happen to have some sort of an esoterical bond with Cheetah Power, if you don't then, no. The most you have with me is minuscule brief respect, to which that is small as your brain. Or close." Jam looked at him. "I didn't understand 70% of what you said but okay, I just- I just don't want to lose or win." Kazar said to Jam and then Jam replied and looked him dead in the eye. "Well then, you need to lose it. If that's what you are, just a lousy loser who exclusively accepts validation from anyone else. Worrying about other's feelings, I don't see you as a friend and even if I did I wouldn't hesitate to elevate you in the air until your pear shaped head decimates. Now if you don't want to be a loser, I expect you to attack me as if I was that lame fool who incompetently lost to you earlier, you ostracized ostrich!" Jam answered and he took heed to Jam's word and nodded his head and locked in. Salar looked at him, "There." and then Jam and Kazar went on the battle field. "ALRIGHT, 3...2..1. GO!" And then Kazar ran to Jam and attempted to use Lycan Claw which is a move coming from Lycan Cheetah, the closest representative is a werewolf but in Cheetah form. Jam withstood the Lycan claw and didn't even blink and Jam blew him to the other side of the colosseum, causing him to smack the wall and Jam ran so fast that It looked like teleportation and then Kazar used Lycan blast and blasted it on Jam but Jam threw him out of the world and then Jam ran and jumped out of the world and then Kazar dashed to Jam but then Jam said to him "boo." And scared him into the sun and he was roaring loudly and then Jam said "boo" to the sun and the sun flew away and was yelling. "Idiotic sun." Jam said and he saw Kazar floating in pain and then Jam threw him back at the colosseum and then Jam landed on the ground and stomped the ground lightly and broke Kazar's heart. Kazar yelled and collapsed. Salar looked down. Jam walked to Kazar. "Live. You wimpy werewolf tongue!" And Kazar started to breathe more and he looked at Jam. "You're strong." Jam looked "I didn't use any percentage of my strength and was going easy. You Metamorphing Jawbreaker!" Kazar had fast regeneration and he stood up and he looked at Jam. "THE WINNER IS...JAM!" And then Dirus grinned at Jam and then the next match was Dirus VS Salar. Kazar looked at him "GOODLUCK!" Salar looked at him. "You're strong, I will admit but with me, strength does not matter." He said pridefully. The God Cheetahs were talking and looking at the battlefield. Salar used Rocktonomy, causing the battlefield to turn into an rock terrain and he made boulders the battle field and he threw it towards Dirus but Dirus stomped the ground and the rocks disappeared. "Heh." And he used Blast Claw and blasted it towards him but before Salar could dodge, Dirus used Blast Waves and let it push him from behind and caused a huge explosion, sending Salar into the air and he was in immense pain but then he used Rock Moon and blasted it to Salar but Dirus used Body Blast and blasted through it and clawed Salar in his face and then he grabbed Salar and spun faster than the speed of light while holding him by the grasp of his neck and while spinning he talked to him. "Did you seriously think that I would let you win? That trophy is mine, all of them! Jam will lose just as pathetically as you will, and after this, I will kill your pathetic Kazar. AHAHAHA!" He used Ultimate Blast and Blasted him to the ground and then he used the Blast Sword and diced the ground next by him and he looked at Jam and then stabbed Salar out of existence. "NOOO!" Kazar ran to Dirus and used Lycan Claw but he decimated the power and then threw him far into the ground and he smirked at Jam but Jam was not intimidated. "You're next." He said to Jam, menacingly. Jam replied to to him. "Your attempts to intimidate me is as disappointing as the fact that you overuse crystals to your advantage in battle. You heroic toenail!" And Jam glared at him. "HERE ARE OUR FINAL CONTESTANTS AS THEY HEAD TO THE FINALS, JAM VS DIRUS!" Dirus looked at Jam. "You're insignificant, I will put you in the mud with your two pathetic little friends!" Jam looked at him. "I don't have friends, you Metamorphin' endorsing idiot that turns into an horse when his forehead proclaims Itself as an orphan! Piece of decimating cock a doo doo doo dookie bounce head loser!" Dirus bursted out laughing. "NO WAY THAT THIS, THIS IS MY OPPONENT! I AM HONORED!" Jam replied. "You sound like a bouncing basketball when you laugh, you alchoholic monkey chest!" Jam retorted. "Well, we will see after I destroy you." Dirus smiled at Jam but Jam was contrary to his smile. And then the referee yelled at them. "CUT IT OUT, BOTH OF YOU!" But they both threatened to end his misery and beat his head with a gazelle buttered, ranch washed, garlic nacho taco in unison and then he looked down And then they looked back at eachother. "You ready?" Dirus asked Jam. Jam aggressively replied. "You talk too much, you middle school pistol toe!" "3...2..1. GO!" Dirus yelled at Jam, "I am gonna end this QUICKLY!" And then he expeditiously flew up in the air and used Multi Dragon Blast and blasted ten colossal dragons at Jam and then it all hit him, causing an large explosion. Kazar jumped out of the ground and looked at the smoke. "JAM!" Kazar yelled but then Dirus ran to Kazar. "Your Jam is gone. Don't cry like a pathetic loser, he never was your friend. Infact, he hated you." Dirus told Kazar and Kazar looked down. "Now, I will end YOUR misery!" He jumped into the air and used Ultimate SuperBlastics and threw it at Kazar and then Kazar closed his eyes and looked the other way and for some strange reason, the blast didn't impact him. He slowly opened his eyes and then looked and saw Jam standing infront of him. "Get out of my way, you pulverized elephant nipple! And then Jam glared at Dirus. The referee was inside of his air vehicle and flew towards Jam. "IT LOOKS LIKE JAM DIDN'T DIE AFTER ALL! WAIT, HE DOESN'T EVEN LOOK...PHASED! WHO IS THIS GUY?" And then Jam ran and then jumped, the impact of his jump being so powerful that the colosseum split in halfs and then Jam turned his whole body into a spike ball and spun faster than even an God Cheetah's eyes can see and clashed with Dirus and then Jam grabbed Dirus and tore his body in halfs but kept him alive through all of that so that he could feel the pain and he grabbed his head. "Let me know what the sun feels like right now, you nihillistic pigeon beard!" And Jam threw him through the sun but ultimately out of existence and then Jam saw half of his body falling on the ground so he dived down and shawled it out of existence and Jam looked at the Referee and the crowd. "I didn't use 000000000% of my strength, you busted nether portal heads! And the crowd cheered loudly. "WHAT A BODY SHATTERING VICTORY!" The Referee shouted and then Marculus looked at them. "JAM JUST BEAT THE STRONGEST TOURNAMENT FIGHTER!" Marculus said and yelled at them with his eyes buldging out. ET looked distressed. "We really need him on our team." and then Jam looked at Cheetah Power who was floating in the sky and then Cheetah Power brought Salar back to existence and then Salar ran to Jam and tried to hug him. "If you wanna live, I suggest you back up, you wing flapping egyptian fishbowl head!" And he looked at Jam. "YOU WON!" Jam looked at him angrily and then Kazar was cheering out of excitement! "YEAHHHHH!" He jumped up and down and so did Salar. Kazar went to Jam. "Dirus said that me and you weren't friends, is it true?" he asked Jam. "Yeah. You punctured lung!" Suddenly, an orange jaw hurled it's way over to Kazar and it was Skyfire. "OH, OH, OH-" Kazar decimated the loser and then looked at Jam. "It's okay, you've helped me enough." Salar looked at them. "We should meet up again sometime in the future." Salar suggested. Jam looked at him. "That would be the day where I'd become the creator of existence. You cringe infringed larnyx chin! " Salar looked at Jam. "But that's not possible." and Jam answered "Exactly, you trumpet chest!" And then Kazar laughed. "Well, whenever that is, I hope that we will be strong enough to destroy everybody in this universe!" Kazar smiled at them and Salar nodded but then Jam began to walk away. "I could do that right now. You broke down violin shoulder boulder head failures!" As Jam walked away Sia stopped Volcano from destroying Marculus because they had got into a serious fight. Sia looked at Jam as he walked away and Jam glared at her and left. "I guess we go our separate ways." Kazar said to Salar. Salar nodded and he looked at him. "See you someday, friend." And they both left and then Sia looked at them. "As all of you idiots know, I will destroy this universe and put an end to The Creator." Arrex looked at Sia. "Why?" Sia looked at him. "Power." Flex looked at Sia. "You will not succeed Sia. 'Pride Comes Before The Fall." He walked to her. And she looked at him. "Quote as many bible verses as you want. That's not gonna stop me from eradicating you all! Let's see what you pathetic God failures can do!" And then she disappeared. ET being the size of a cub looked at them. "THAT LITTLE RAT!" And they all looked down on him and he looked at them. "What?" Arrex looked at them. "We will figure out a way, we always do."

  Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.