Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Six - Wishing for Nades

  Unfortunately, I had to drive back to my apartment before I could help back out to the portal. The moment I walked in, I felt a wave of tiredness that had me slumping--carefully--on my bed. I wasn't initially planning on sleeping, but it seemed like my body demanded otherwise.

  Screw it. I set an alarm for four in the morning. It would give me a few hours, and I'd be able to make it to the Redlad Welding building before the breach happened, even through early morning traffic.

  Then I sent a pair of texts. One to Fran, the other to Becky. I told both of them to meet me at a gas station not too far from the industrial zone at six and to text me once they saw the other.

  I... wouldn't be showing up. That was rude as hell, but I had to know if one or both couldn't make it.

  Honestly, I figured that if one of that would be a no-show, it would be Becky. I liked the girl, but she didn't give off 'punctual and organized' vibes the way Fran did.

  I shut my eyes, groaning a little as Mister Couchtop climbed up onto my side and dug his little paws into some of my sutures, but he settled in nice enough and then I slipped into sleep.

  All too soon, my alarm went off and I had to force myself out of bed. I was still feeling like ass, but the nap had helped. Downing some meds from my bathroom cabinet... didn't help right away, but once they kicked in, they might. I capped it off with a quick cast of Sooth Minor Pain, the best spell ever, then I slid on my boots, grabbed the gear I'd originally come here to grab, and then an energy drink as well, for the road.

  It wasn't long after that that I was on my way through the city.

  The caffeine and sugar and the stress of waking up all came together to help bring me back to something close to full wakefulness. Other than the slight phantom pain along my side and the itch of my eyes, I was nearly in top form.

  I'd had worse days functioning on less sleep.

  Damn, if this wasn't a once in a... well, maybe not lifetime, but at least a once-in-a-month opportunity to maybe take out two portals in a row, then I'd give up on the whole thing.

  I wasn't in a state to be fighting. Easy operation or no. I was going to do it anyway because the pain now would be worth the reward later.

  As it stood, I was hitting an average of one and a half portals a week, more or less. One with work and half just on the side as either a solo portal or with the girls. That was crazy good growth, but if I wanted to hit Rank C before the big Breaches, I needed to be fast. Maybe this pace was enough, but I'd rather sacrifice some comfort and sleep now and hit Rank C early than miss the mark.

  I arrived in front of the Redlad Welding building, parked my bike, then stood off of it. I was in my leotard already, with my slightly-armoured poncho on. Basically, I was about as ready as I could be for a fight on short notice.

  I'd really have to bother Jane to get some slightly better armour at some point. Arm guards, leg guards, maybe something like a helmet?

  I was pretty sure that throughout all of human history, every army ever wore helmets of some form or another, even when they weren't big on other kinds of armour.

  There was no wasting time before entering on this loop. I slung my rifle over one shoulder, made sure my shotgun was snug against my side, and I checked my revolver in its sheath and my sword in its own, then I picked up a fist-sized rock off the floor and put it through the window at the front with a loud crash.

  I was in a few moments later.

  When I found the portal, it was entirely unguarded, though I did walk around it and taste the air. The magic was a little... wonky? It definitely felt like it was on the verge of breaching.

  I bounced on the spot a couple of times, making sure all of my gear wasn't too loose or clanky. I wasn't planning on stealth, quite the opposite, but if I had to sneak around, then I didn't want to be too absurdly loud if I could avoid it.

  A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

  "Nothing for it," I muttered.

  Just as I was about to step in, I got a text. It was from Becky.

  Becky: where tf are u? Am waiting. Cold + bored.

  Huh, would you look at that? And it wasn't even six thirty yet.

  Shaking my head, I shouldered my rifle, then leapt through the portal.

  The first thing I noticed was that the other side was well-lit. There was the familiar orange-red flicker of firelight splashing against the walls, illuminating the whole place well enough to see in. That was because there were about seven kobolds, all holding torches, and those seven were spread out amongst a much larger group.

  There was a long, long moment where I stared at the... what, three dozen kobolds? There were a lot of them, and most looked like they were in the middle of preparing to have a fun little outing of the violent sort.

  "Oops?" I tried.

  That wasn't nearly as disarming as I had hoped it might be.

  A particularly large kobold roared something and pointed what looked very much like a sword down and at me. Down because he was, when he straightened his back, a little taller than I was.

  So I flicked the safety on my rifle off with a thumb and slammed three bullets into his chest.

  The loud retort of my rifle had the kobolds flinching back, at least for a moment. I spun, tagging another, then I switched to full-auto and basically just sprayed...for about a tenth of a second before my gun clicked empty.

  I was just tossing the rifle down to switch to my shotgun when I felt a sharp pain across my leg.

  I hissed, but not before the pain worsened and I felt something touching the bone inside my leg, muscle tearing and blood pissing out of me.

  Some little fuck had stuck me with a knife, right in the thigh, too. I bashed him in the face with my elbow, only to be slammed into the side by a bigger kobold that football tackled me. We went down in a heap, and I raised my arms to protect my face. Fuck, I was going ot be overwhelmed if I...

  Screw it.

  I Reloaded.

  I found myself back next to my bike. I tested my leg, looking for a pain that wasn't there. That had sucked.

  I wished that I had a recording off all of that, but all I had to rely on were my memories, and things had gotten a little hazy.

  How many?

  I tried to recreate the scene in my mind, counting heads as I did. I was pretty sure I was wrong, but there were at least a solid two dozen kobolds in that room.

  The walls had been stone. Not cave stone, but like, worked stones, stacked together and mortared in place. A bit primitive, but not like, purely natural.

  Right, that had sucked.

  It was also about what I could expect, right? Even if the portal wasn't breached yet that didn't mean that the monsters within weren't getting ready for it. I'd seen something similar with those orcs. They had been organizing and preparing to leave their portal home for a while, and came out somewhat ready for it.

  The kobolds had the intelligence to prepare and group up, they could work together and make tools. They were smarter than the average animal by a long shot.

  Too bad that seemed pretty invasive and ready to stab me a bunch.

  So, what to do... I could arrive earlier. Before they were fully prepared.

  Arriving with the girls would help, but I didn't want to scout the place out with them. I wanted to take my time with the scouting, go at my own pace.

  So, how could someone clear a room-full of antagonists without risking themselves? If I had access to better--no, not better just more explosive--magic, then I might be able to pick up a neat little AOE spell. Becky could probably clear the room just by charging up a powerful spell and letting it loose. Any of the C-rankers I'd seen so far could do it with ease.

  Ah... wait, explosives.

  How easy was it to obtain hand grenades in Fortress ENE at midnight? Because the answer to that might well be the solution to my problem.

  ***