I texted Vance when I woke. The sun had already set. I wrote “Do you wanna come over tonight?” After I sent that, I wish I had given it more thought and said something clever or at least funny, but I acted on impulse after sleeping restlessly all day and sent what I sent. For some unknown reason or maybe no reason at all, I was craving apple juice and so I went to the refrigerator and poured some into a rocks glass instead of my usual scotch. I enjoyed how chilled it was as I drank it while watching TikToks and waiting for a response from Vance. It came about twenty minutes later: “Can’t. I’m in San Francisco. Back in LA Friday. I’m all yours then.”

  I wondered whose he was in San Francisco and tried to convince myself he was just there doing stuff for the next vampire ball, but I wasn’t very successful because I knew that even though it’s probably a ton of work to throw a big event like his, he must have some free time and that time is probably being spent with someone because he’s so popular and because he’s so good looking. Maybe he’s there with Vanessa. Maybe she’s from San Francisco. Maybe that’s why he picked it for the next ball. Vance and Vanessa. Vanessa and Vance. Perfect match. The kind of couple who wears matching pajamas. I’m just jealous. Jealous of Vanessa. But I think it’s very possible that the name Vanessa was invented just to make other girls jealous. It’s that kind of name. Actually, truth be told, I always thought the name Vanessa was pretty before I knew it was hers.

  I didn’t know what to write back, but knew I had to reply quickly in order not to look disappointed. I typed “Sure thing” then backspaced over it and then typed “Friday’s good,” then backspaced over “good” and typed “works” and sent that: “Friday works.” He immediately sent back a smiling emoji. So I guess that’s that.

  I had other texts waiting, including one from Codrina, informing me that our visitors from Romania were coming this week and they hoped I would receive them on Friday. I then wished I had checked all my texts before texting Vance in the first place. I didn’t really want to text Vance back to change dates on him so I struggled on whether to put my life as Cob?lcescu Empress before my personal life. Eventually, I texted Codrina suggesting they visit on Thursday and if that didn’t work, Saturday. She confirmed Thursday.

  When Rosanna came up from our secret sleeping chamber, I asked if she had any plans Thursday night as we were expecting company, and she confirmed she didn’t have any. She made espresso, and then sat at the kitchen table with me and suggested we do something special for our guests. We eventually nixed the idea of getting a cake, not even cupcakes, but decided to buy lots of expensive champagne.

  I texted Khalil to invite him as well, but was surprised to learn he was in New York, visiting Constanza whom he had met when she came to Los Angeles at my request to protect him during my time spent abroad due to the war. I didn’t realize they had gotten close during those weeks together. I don’t mean romantically. I remember Constanza mentioning having a mortal lover, so I have no reason to think something might be going on with Khalil. At least I know he’ll be safe with her once again. Since this is my journal, I can admit I was a little hurt he didn’t tell me he was going to New York. Compared to Mayuko and Kristy, Khalil’s life seems more distant. I genuinely don’t think he has a dislike of me, quite the opposite: I know he cares about me a lot, his life is just less interdependent than it had been with my other two fledglings. He offered to return early and make it back by Thursday, and I knew he was sincere, but I told him it wasn’t important enough for him to change his plans and go through so much trouble. I feel like I’m being too needy with him, wanting to feel needed.

  You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.

  Again, since this is my journal, I can also admit I wish the visit from our Cob?lcescu visitors didn’t have to be this week, because it’s Vance that’s on my mind, and not our guests.

  I’m tempted to pick up my phone, tempted to text Vance again. I don’t know what I would say. I just want to be talking to him. I wish he was the one texting me.

  Shit. I just went on Instagram. Vance posted a pic of our caricatures from the night of the art show and tagged me. He clearly went through effort, cropping it and adjusting the lighting. Us, dressed up, side by side, with comically big heads and exaggerated fanged smiles. He captioned it: “With my empress.” Again there’s tons of likes and lots of comments. Most of them include laughing emojis. I assume that’s because caricatures are meant to be funny. But it makes me feel like I’m being laughed at.

  “MY empress.” He didn’t have to say “MY empress.” He could have said “With THE empress” or “With AN empress” or even “with @mydarlingtragedy” or just “with some girl.” (No, he wouldn’t say that.) Is he claiming me as his? Or is he already claiming to be Cob?lcescu?

  Vanessa didn’t like the pic, but she commented on it. Just one word: “Usurped” and then a laughing emoji. I don’t feel like I’m being taken seriously. As a rival. As a love interest or even just as an adversary. I know she knows who I am. Doesn’t she know I can end her? Does she feel so protected because she’s part of the largest coven? Sure, our war ended without either side conceding to the other, but I know a truth you don’t know, Vanessa. Your coven lord, Candelario, folded before me because…

  Oh, what’s the use? I’m not gonna do anything like that. Nothing violent.

  I’m gonna try to make Vance like me more than he likes you. That’s all.

  That’s all? It feels pretty hopeless.

  Unless…

  You really are too young to turn him, Vanessa dear.

  I rinsed out the apple juice and poured a real drink. I read back what I just wrote. I’m wildin. I don’t want to turn Vance. Or rather, I don’t want him to pick me over her because I can turn him if she can’t, or will if she won’t. But she can’t, can she? That’s the real meaning behind her comment of “Usurped.” Surely she doesn’t find that funny. But the laughing emoji is crying after all.

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