The weather is nice

  The clouds give off a nice touch and the blue sky makes it feel even nicer

  It's been really hard in recent times to have such a lovely weather

  It is something to be appreciated so Mr Yakuza would have to excuse me for not listening to his relentless droning

  Though he doesn't even care about my existence so it's really not necessary for me to listen in class anyway

  But the word 'relentless' is something we do share in common

  I mean he talks to a class full of people who don't actually give a shit

  And I exist

  So in conclusion we are both pointlessly working hard

  He would still get paid his wages whether the students pass or fail

  And I will always be this 'thing', this less than human as long as I exist or not

  Sometimes I think to myself that; is this really what I want

  To hear the cool breeze blow in

  To see the blue sky

  To hear the sounds coming from the other students

  Hmm my deskmate seems louder than usual but I don't dare to check

  To breathe air into my lungs

  Hmm something smells funny

  But why do I have the ability to do all this stuff

  I'm not asking for it to be taken away from me

  No that defeats the purpose

  See I want everything to be taken away

  Especially the beating of my heart

  But some things are still beyond what I can do

  And now I'm stuck here

  Not living but merely existing

  Why why why

  Why can't I do something that I truly wish for

  Well the perfect example of why would be this morning

  I woke up alone in my dorm room as usual

  At the beginning of the semester;

  My roommates took one look at me and petitioned to sleep in a separate place.

  While they use the room I stay in as a hangout plus storage

  They couldn't stand the idea of staying anywhere near me

  Though I can't blame them

  I wouldn't want to be near me either

  I went through the routine careful not to go past the boundary set out for me

  And then I locked the door with one turn of the key

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  There was no need to go the extra mile to ensure that one turn was enough

  No one was going to actually steal from something like me

  Nor do my roommates care if someone else stole it

  I would take the blame for it anyway

  Then they would beat me up happily

  Ah I'm going off track

  There's no need to remember the painful parts of my life

  After all it's never going to stop

  And my body remembers it plenty

  Hmm I've gone away again

  Stupid stupid

  Not that's it really comes off as a surprise to me anymore

  The other students are aware of it too

  I can hear it under their breath when I walk past them

  I'd actually prefer their direct taunting to physical attacks

  Ah my body still aches

  And I'm going off track again

  What was the reason for this sudden reminiscing again

  Well I'll figure it out

  Hmm I think my deskmate just growled

  Stupid you're getting distracted again

  Let's continue with me walking to drop off the key

  Yes that's right

  I was walking to drop off my dorm key

  When I bumped into someone or more accurately someone crashed into me

  I fell down harshly and let out a slight groan

  Ahh I landed on one of my fresh bruises again

  "Watch where you're going trash" the voice of the cause of this whole episode said

  His voice came off with 5 points disgust and 4 points anger

  Although he was the one that practically crashed into me

  Resulting in my fall on the floor

  But what actually happened doesn't matter in this type of situation

  Or in any situation related to me, after all I'm always in the wrong

  I should have spared more effort to dodge out of his way but I didn't have the energy to do it

  Plus my skinny frame can't hold a candle to his normal physique

  He's like twice my size and he's a normal teenager

  A normal teenager that actually eats real food

  Not like me who barely has anything to eat

  Well eating is for people anyways

  And I'm not qualified as a 'human being'

  No I'm something lesser than a human being

  The most natural thing in the world is to at least be a human being

  Or in more accuracy is to be able to live and call oneself a human being

  And as the lesser being that I am I swiftly changed to a kneeling position

  "I.. I.. I'm sorry" I stuttered out an apology in a voice that was both weak and frightened

  Please don't do anything

  Please don't do anything

  Please just leave

  Please...please

  That was all I could think about

  Not the position I was in or the implications of bowing my head

  Because honestly implications are for 'people' first of all

  Second of all it also involves something owned by the bearer

  The only thing I have is myself

  And that isn't worth anything

  The response I got was his hand about to touch my head

  Thud!

  I slammed my head on the cool concrete

  "I'm sorry" I said more coherently in a loud whisper

  I had no other available options with which I could resolve the incident

  In times of extreme danger; there are two most basic responses

  It's either fight or flight

  Fighting is impossible for me,I mean have you seen how weak and feeble I look

  Flight would just result in him coming after me in a more secluded spot which would increase the number of bruises I presently have

  What else is there to do

  Hope for help

  Haha

  That's even worse

  What do you think this is; a movie

  Do you think that the matron would appear to chase him off or a teacher would be passing by

  So what if they did; the adult would just look away once he realizes it's me

  No this is real life

  Where less than human beings like me have no dignity or pride

  We bow our head when we need to because we don't have an emotion called shame

  "Hah so disgusting" the 4 points anger turned into disgust completely

  And I didn't lift up my head until I heard his footsteps walking away

  Phew I made it

  I picked myself up from the floor and hurried to class after dropping the key

  I've already gone through enough just this morning

  I ran to class sticking to the shadows and in corners

  I almost slipped and made a mistake once again but I regained my balance before the damage was done

  Phew I was not looking forward to touching another student again

  Haaa why is there water leaking out of the girl's bathroom anyway

  Aside from that, the journey to my classroom was easier

  I made it just in time

  20 minutes before everyone else

  Though there was a plump boy walking infront of me just before I entered the classroom

  But he was in another classroom

  I made my way to my regular seat at the back corner and sat down facing the window beside me

  My deskmate came after me

  Hmm, was he always this early

  That's a surprise but he usually comes early for class anyway

  Maybe he just woke up earlier

  I turned my eyes away from him as the classroom began to fill up

  That's what led me to this point in time admiring the weather

  And reminiscing

  To find out something

  What was it aga...

  Pain

  I felt a hot searing pain in my neck

  I felt sharp teeth pierce my artery as I tried to scream

  I was on the floor now choking out bloody gasps

  It hurts

  My vision was getting darker

  Is this it

  Is this the end of my life

  Will I finally get what I've always wanted

  Hehe

  Please.... hehe

  Let....it...all...hehe

  Hehe

  End

  I want it to finally end

  Hehe..

  ..................................

  The weather is nice