Ling Yun was waiting for her to fall asleep. When he felt her steady breathing, he carefully extracted himself from her warm embrace. Fortunately she didn't wake up, still lost in sweet dreams.

  He got up from the bed, collected his robe and left the room. He didn't look back at the alluring naked figure that many would give their everything to see nor the face and lips which had roamed all over his chest.

  He didn't need to because none of it mattered. Whatever happened this night, whatever she did to him, he didn't care about any of it. No, he couldn't care about any of it.

  His first stop was the bathroom. Here he disrobed, for the first time in this night of his own volition, and entered after filling it. The first thing he wanted to get rid of was that disgusting sweat sticking to his skin. It was a combination of both his and her's and it reminded of that activity.

  He started scrubbing vigorously all over his body. So lost he was in it that he only regained his senses when he felt a sudden pain on his stomach. Upon looking he found out that his skin had turned red in different places and there were also some marks left because he failed to control his strength. Anymore and it would start bleeding.

  He looked at his shaking hands and started laughing. It was a hoarse empty laughter, the laugh of man devoid of any joy who didn't deserve to get angry but refused to let himself cry.

  Hahahaha! You thought you were prepared and your courage evaporated as soon as you entered the room. What a coward!

  And trying to talk about the sanctity of the master-disciple relationship at the last moment? You fool! You were on her bed and you thought she would back down at this critical moment!

  The laughter continued for a long time till there was nothing left in chest. With a deep breath, he got up from the bath and started drying himself. The water only removed the stains; how wonderful it would've been if it could also wash away what caused the stains.

  Even after nearly peeling my skin, I still feel dirty.

  He entered the cultivation chamber to cultivate but like his mind, the circulation of Qi was unstable. Still he tried to brute force it, he had to keep moving forward.

  "Ling Yun stop acting like a child. With the state you're mind is in, you will certainly go into Qi deviation."

  He ignored her and kept on gathering Qi in his dantian. He doesn't want to talk to anybody, especially her.

  "Oh I see! Forgive me for making such a silly mistake. You aren't a child anymore, are you?"

  The reminder triggered him. He stopped his cultivation and closed his eyes, going deep into his soul sea. Usually they talked mentally so it had been a long time since he met her like this.

  There she was, standing on the endless ocean under the chained silhouette of the burning Pheonix. Although she looked like a ten year old little girl, the haughty look in her amethyst eyes made everyone feel inferior as if she was looking down on the entire creation.

  She remained still watching Ling Yun charging towards her like a mad bull. He reached her and grabbed her shoulders, his fingers pressing hard on her small figure. He lifted her in the air but before he could make any futher moves, with the same haughty look and bored face, Brahma slapped him hard.

  Ling Yun got stunned for a moment. "Finally cleared your head or do you need another?" Wordlessly he dropped her and turned around walking back. There was no point in talking with her.

  She slowly glided to the surface and shouted at the retreating back. "How long are you going to stay silent? If you are really angry, you know you could erase me with a single thought. No need to get physical with me."

  Ling Yun turned around and shouted back. "Shut up if you don't wish to die this instant. Don't try to test me now!"

  "Hmph! You can never erase me Ling Yun. Never. Do you know why?" Her words hung in the air forcing him to acknowledge them. She had paused for a moment to look at the furious Ling Yun. His face tense, his hands tightly clenched into fists; he was a man one step away from exploding in rage. Yet still she continued to push further.

  "Because you need me."

  And there is was. The bare ugly truth. Among her deceit, the manipulations and betrayal, this cold truth trumped everything. Her words drilled deep inside his chest. As he couldn't deny that, Ling Yun could only look down in shame.

  "You remember when you called me master. At that time, I accepted from the bottom of my heart." Ling Yun couldn't help but make an incredulous expression. After betraying him like this, she still has the gall to call herself master.

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  "Oh don't give me that look. Being your master means I will guide you to the best path I can, not the easiest path. Don't expect me to coddle you like I'm your mother.

  "Now tell me what happened tonight, whose fault was it?"

  Her words stabbed him like a dagger.

  "Was it me who kept you in the dark about her intentions?"

  "Stop it." His words barely a whisper pleading her not to push the dagger deeper.

  "Was it the alchemist who deceived and took advantage of you?"

  She had trapped him with no escape, forcing him to face the mirror.

  "Who did this to you?"

  "It was me. Everything that happened was by my own decision."

  With his admission he finally broke down. He sat down hugging himself; trying to make himself as small as possible. He knew that he was the one who chose to enter her chambers fully knowing what it meant. He has no right to blame anyone else, especially Mu Feixue.

  But what about this pain, this frustration and anger that keeps gnawing at his chest? At whom can he throw it all?

  Little Hua, Chensha, look I did it. I made the right decision.... Right?

  Lost in his misery, he felt a sudden touch on his head. Brahma stood beside him and started patting his head.

  "Ling Yun I know it must be difficult for you. You can hate me if you want. It's undeniable that I did you wrong. But I want you to forever engrave this truth in your heart."

  As she kept patting, both of them were looking straight at the endless horizon in his soul sea.

  "In this world there is always a give and take. Nothing is free. As you climb higher, you will find yourself tangled further into this. Never be naive to believe in the goodness of people's heart. Everyone will be secretly looking for their own benefits.

  "My only advice is this- Use and be used."

  Her profound words slowly settled in his heart. She bent down infront of him, amethyst met blue, as she peered straight into his eyes,

  "Look at us. I only accepted you as my disciple to use you to reach the top. And similarly you are using me to get stronger. You can call us a pair of master and disciple and all that but in the end it's just you're using me and I'm using you. At its core every relation is like this."

  Yes, what she is saying is right. I can only curse myself for being naive. What right do I have to expect Mu Feixue to teach me everything without demanding anything.

  With his mind cleared, he stood up filled with determination. He exited the cultivation chamber and went back to his room.

  "Don't try to cultivate anymore. You should just go to sleep."

  Ling Yun scoffed at Brahma. "Sleep? I wish I could sleep. You know that." Even in Mu Feixue's embrace after doing the deed, nightmares returned whenever he closed his eyes. His punishment was still continuing ever since that night.

  He needed something to keep his mind occupied so he doesn't think about that. Ling Yun had wanted to go through the scrolls Mu Feixue had given him.

  Since I had already paid the price, I should make use of everything I can.

  But Brahma still kept bothering him.

  "I had hoped after a night of fun something would've changed. So how was it?"

  "Are you purposeful trying to make me angry?" Ling Yun sneered at her suggestion.

  Brahma rolled her eyes at that. "Do you think I want to listen to the nightly adventures of a young brat? I'm doing this for you. I could feel that it has become a scar carved deep in your heart. Talking about it would make your heart lighter and make it slowly fade. Otherwise I fear it could turn into a heart demon further affecting your cultivation."

  Ling Yun's eyes twitched at the last sentence. "I should have figured it out when you started acting so nice. It all comes down to my cultivation. So tell me, why should I have to talk to you about it?"

  Brahma just replied with a smirk. "Because you have no one else."

  Her reminder struck like another arrow to his chest. Maybe he should have stayed back in that small village. In this huge immortal city, he was all alone surrounded by cunning people who wanted to use him.

  Seeing he was still silent, Brahma offered another suggestion. "You know if it's too painful you can choose to alter your memories. Although tampering with the soul should be avoided as much as possible, it would be grave if this turned to into a irreversible trauma."

  The suggestion though tempting was immediately discarded in his mind. If he wanted, he could've forgotten about that night and would be sleeping blissfully. But Ling Yun could never choose to do it.

  That night and this night, happened due to the choices he made or didn't make. Removing it would be taking the path of a coward and he would rather die than forget.

  He looked at Brahma waiting for him. Although he didn't want to remember, what she said was true. Talking about it would definitely help and he wants to release all the filth from this night buried inside him.

  After cursing himself for being so pitiful that he can only rely on someone like Brahma, Ling Yun began to speak.

  "The thing that I hated the most was the feeling of being used. I never had any say, any control. My mind was hazy from the drink and she started using my body like.. like I'm was her toy. Never once she asked me...

  ****

  Mu Feixue opened her eyes long after sunrise. She was always a heavy sleeper, a bad habit she picked up after the passing of her master. It began as a form of rebellion after being forced to wake up an hour before sunrise during her training but soon it stuck and became a part of her routine.

  Her eyes blinked and the first thing she noticed was the missing warmth in her arms. The boy she had embraced tightly last night was gone.

  Hmmm I wanted to be his face the first thing I see in the morning.

  She tried to find him using divine sense and to her surprise he was standing just beside her bed.

  She turned around and saw a scroll in his hand. "Good morning master. The disciple has a few questions about the Heart of Flame technique. Can you please help me?"

  If there was one flaw in her baby, it was that he was too diligent. Seriously who immediately goes back to studying after their first time? Still it was one of the things that made him cute.

  Mu Feixue stretched her shoulders and made an exaggerated yawning noise. "Yaaawn.. Baby master is still so drowsy." Her eyes sparkled mischievously as she pursed her lips. "Why don't you wake me up with a morning kiss?"

  Ling Yun looked at her cherry red lips for a moment and pressed his onto them without any hesitation. It was just light peck but the first kiss given of his own choice.

  As she closed her eyes and licked her lips in delight, she was unable to see the gentle pools of his eyes freeze into icy lakes chilling the soul.

  Use and be used.