It has been a few weeks since I took Tadwick to visit Darling. I have to say… I really think it has helped. I decided to sleep in his room with him for a while after the visit and whilst he is still waking up once or twice a night… he isn’t screaming or crying. He jolts up, looking a bit sweaty and panicked… but not emotionally distraught. Which is honestly a big improvement.

  Even when the boys went camping, he always had to stay in Nomius’ tent, so Nomius could calm him down as quickly as possible. But now… now he might actually be able to share a tent with his friends… or even have friends stay over in his room. For the past week, neither me nor Kiyui has had to go to his room in the night to get him back to sleep. So… despite the very awkward sex related conversations that needed to be had… I would say that visiting Darling was definitely a success.

  During the daytime he is much the same as before though. Still bounding about, full of energy. He is currently chasing the sheep in Nomius’ field, pretending to be a sheepdog.

  Svampe and Becky are officially a thing now. I don’t mean married, obviously. But they are now openly admitting that they are courting. His word, not mine. I guess some posh phrases are still ingrained within him. She seems nice… and she has gifted us with a couple of things from the bakery that were amazing. She seems to have a real skill for pastries. She makes them so buttery and crumbly… just… gods.

  Grant has been trying to outshine her a bit by gifting us cakes. Which have also been lovely… but he’s still only ten… I say that, he’ll be eleven in a few weeks. My point is, that he is clearly still practising. Not that I can make a better cake than him… I cannot bake… it is not a skill that I possess. Just to clarify, I am not, in any way, knocking Grant’s baking… I’m just saying that he isn’t as good as his sister… who is abnormally skilled in this area.

  At this point… I am very much inclined to believe Charlie’s assessment about Grant having a crush on Alexi. I don’t really think it can be denied anymore… despite Tadwick’s objections. The cakes have all been given to Alexi, who has then shared them with everyone. Alexi is clearly completely oblivious. And to be fair… I think Grant is as well. Like I said… he’s only ten. I think we probably have a year, possibly two, of them being oblivious though… well… of Grant being oblivious… I think Alexi won’t get the hint until somebody outright tells him.

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  Kiyui and I are doing well. I think we definitely took a big step forward. Since we haven’t been needing to rush up to Tadwick during the evenings recently we have been spending a lot of time at night talking… specifically about… well… the difficult stuff that we normally avoid. My memories of the nest… the things that still haunt me… Kiyui’s issues with subduing his demonic half… the things that it caused him to do in the past. You know… the really uplifting stuff. But that’s the thing… at the time… when we talk about it… it is cripplingly depressing. There are often tears. But… afterwards… it is like a weight has been lifted. Which I am well aware is a big cliché… but I can’t think how else to describe it. It’s like I can breathe easier.

  Actually, thinking about it. That happens whenever I’m around Kiyui now. Just the sight of him makes it easier to breathe. Is that normal? Should my body respond to him in such a physical way? Is it more that not being around him puts me on edge and thus my breathing is more laboured? Honestly… even after being with him for over four years I still don’t fully understand how love works. Even now… as we are just sat on the bench outside the barn watching Tadwick being mental in the sheep field. I just feel… so calm… and happy.

  Well… I did five seconds ago… until I saw Chloe ride onto the farm. She never shows up on the farm unless something is going on.

  She tied up her horse and walked over to the bench, laughing.

  Chloe: “Tires me out just watching that kid.”

  Kiyui: “He is rather brimming with youthful energy.”

  Dwynfel: “Everything alright?”

  Chloe: “Not really. Olly and Dolly here?”

  Kiyui: “Yeah, Dolly is over by the well and Olly is getting the sheep feed ready. Why?”

  Chloe: “I’ll explain when I’ve got the three of you together. I’ll get those two. Meet you in your kitchen.”

  She walked off towards the well. She seems… weighed down by something.

  Kiyui: “Something’s getting to her.”

  Dwynfel: “Guess we better wait for her in the kitchen. Wonder why she wants you three.”

  We went inside and made tea. Kiyui specifically opted for peppermint tea to try and soothe Chloe a bit. Chloe returned with Olly and Dolly. The two of them looked confused. Probably because Chloe has never come to the farm looking for those two before. It has always been me or Lucas related. I have to admit… I am certainly perplexed by this situation.

  Chloe sat at the table, exasperated. She took a sip from her tea and sighed. Olly sat next to her, facing Dolly. Olly often does this when we have people round that don’t know signs. He sits next to them and translates what they say into signs for Dolly.

  Chloe: “Okay… so… sorry about this. But I need your help.”

  Olly: “What on earth could you need our help with?”

  Dolly: “Do you need wool or something?”

  Chloe: “No. I need whores.”

  Will this newfound outlook allow him to aid Chloe in her continuing investigation of the people going missing around Kataravonia? Only time will tell.