I don’t know what to think. We’re stuck without a car, we lost almost all of our stuff, and there is a potential horde of cannibalistic infected people right on our tails. I’ve only just now caught my breath and it looks like it’s the same for the rest of the group. The horrors of the past days are starting to catch us up, nipping at our ankles. My jacket feels like it’s clinging to me, heat pumping off my body after the chase.

  Dropping the bags is a true relief. I look over to Jonah and his family. The kids seem fine, if a little shaken up and teary eyed. Tara is staring at her hunting rifle with a blank expression. And Jonah himself looks almost resigned, a silent seething only tempered by the knowledge of futility.

  Nadia is hugging Merlin and patting his back, my ears twitch, her comforting whispers are the only sound I can focus on. Looking up shows what I can only assume is the universe pissing on our graves. Soft white flakes fluttering down from the sky, an often joyful sight that no one is happy for. My feet hurt, I need to blow my nose, my clothes are scuffed up, I’m hungry, and now it’s fucking snowing.

  “Fuck!” Jonah breaks the silence. “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Goddamnit, nothing wants to fucking go our way for one damned minute!” His shouting would echo if we were near anything other than trees.

  “Jonah, holy shit dude, you have to calm down,” Merlin pulls away from Nadia, head on a swivel for danger. “What if there’s more sick people around,” He tries stepping towards Jonah, who growls at him in response.

  “For once in your life will you shut the fuck up Merlin!” Jonah’s eyes are wide, rage seeping out from the brown of his irises. Tara gasps and puts her hand on her husband’s shoulder but he brushes it off with a shrug.

  “No I won’t ‘shut the fuck up’ Jonah, because your tantrum is going to get us all killed,” Merlin steps up to Jonah with sheer audacity dispute how much taller the dog is. “I get it, you have kids, you want them safe and happy. Well news fucking flash Jonah, we all want that too, Hazel and Rylan are more important to me than my own shitty blood relatives. But you, and us, can’t keep them safe if we’re dead. So no. You. Shut. The. Fuck. Up,” Everyone stares at the two, my eyes lock to Merlin, preparing for him to get decked. But that doesn’t happen.

  Jonah backs off, eyes softening and brow relaxing. He turns around in a huff, tail between his legs like a misbehaving toddler. I let out a sigh I wasn’t aware I was holding, hands clenching and unclenching. The feeling of being an outsider is still lingering at the back of my mind, these people have known each other for years. I’m just some guy they picked up on their way out of dodge, I’d probably be ripped apart on the side of the road by now if I hadn’t been able to fix their van.

  Deflating with a thump, I sit down on the worn concrete of the road and pull my knees up to my chest. My eyes begin to water, the pure utter hole of shit we’re falling into weighing down on me. This time though, I don’t start crying, it feels too exhausting to cry. I want to go home, but I can’t. Trying to stay occupied, my hands instinctually reach for the bags I dropped.

  After looking through the larger hiking bag, and pulling the revolver out, I realize that it's Tara’s. Zipping it back up, I manage to catch her attention and hand it over to her. She thanks me quietly, arms crossed across her front, before padding back off to stand at the edge of the road. My head turns, a breeze ruffles the fur on my face as well as sends a flutter of snow into my eyes that I have to wipe away. Our surroundings are still just as quiet as before, if not more so with the eerie quiet of snowfall. Wind whips through the trees with a soft whistle, before the woods thin out a while up the road.

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  The sky has gotten darker with the rolling in snow. We’re going to need to find somewhere to stop before anyone gets too cold or wet. Merlin’s jacket is fairly thin and the kids are already getting too tired. I haven’t been out this way in a while but I think I remember there being a town somewhere around here. The city isn’t that far away either so we aren’t in too rural of an area just yet. We need to get moving. I want to get moving, sitting here isn’t doing anyone any good. More arguments will just start and the sick aren’t going to stop to let us rest.

  “We- We need to go,” I say. No one hears me, or they don’t seem to at least. “We need to go,” I try again a little louder. They notice this time. Everyone but Jonah looks over to me, I can tell he heard me though, it’s hard to notice because of how his ears are floppy but they shift a bit.

  “That’s uh probably for the best,” Tara responds, motioning for me to get up with a wave of her hand. Which I do, the sudden influx of eyes on me as I sit in the middle of the road making me conscious of how pathetic I most likely look.

  “So we’re just gonna start walking, no plan or anything?” Merlin asks as he pads over with Nadia, exasperated shock still echoing in his voice from earlier.

  “Well the woods should thin out into a town up ahead, but not there’s exactly much room for making a plan now is there,” Tara snaps back at the cat, though from the immediate flip of her expression she probably didn’t mean to.

  “Oh, uh yeah. Makes sense,” I pat Merlin on the shoulder. Everybody’s getting tired, scared, irritated, and just all around drained.

  Tara calls over her kids, pulling them in close for a quick check up before telling them to stay close. We all start walking, more like trudging. Jonah continues to stand still for a minute, waiting for everyone else to move farther ahead. I pause for a bit, looking back and forth between the rest of the group and the golden furred dog. Already regretting it, I awkwardly wave for him, wincing on the inside in preparation for the awkward silence that’s about to ensue.

  Surprise flashes across his face for a split moment before it drops back to a more exhausted expression. Ears unmoving, tail still, brown eyes downcast, and jaw clenched. He walks up to me, we start moving. Hanging back from the group just a bit. Neither of us speak for a while, in fact no one speaks. Not even Hazel or Rylan. I look down as we walk, turning the revolver around in my hands. The occasional snowflake lands on it, but it’s otherwise unblemished. No pockmarks, no scratches, not a single blemish. It- It must’ve been brand new.

  Now it's tainted though. I shot someone, right through the skull. He was sick, and- and violent, but I still killed him. Maybe I’d feel different if it was like the movies, but it’s not. I mean they were crying for fuck’s sake, they’ve all been crying. Every goddamnned sick person we’ve seen has been crying, choking out snarls and growls between sobs. I can’t help but feel like they’re still in there.

  “Thank you Bruno,” Jonah tells me, almost as if he could read my thoughts. “You did the right thing,” He adds.

  “It doesn’t feel like it,” I look over to him, trying to meet his gaze. He doesn’t though, continuing to look off into the distance. “I feel like I got you all into this mess,” I speak before I think, surprising myself with the admission.

  “No… No you didn’t Bruno. If anything we’re lucky you got Merlin’s van as far as you did,” His reassurance helps a little.

  “I suppose, don’t know if I’d say we’re all that lucky though,” My eyes wander up to the sky, watching the snow drift downwards. I want to believe Jonah, I really do, but right now feels like we’re some of the most unfortunate people alive.

  Bruno has a terrible tolerance for spicy food.