Episode 8: “Rollercoasters and Emotional Baggage”

  [INT. HAPPY TOWN – MORNING]

  (A bright banner stretches across town. It reads: “HAPPY TOWN AMUSEMENT FESTIVAL! FUN MANDATORY!”)

  PRINCESS (on megaphone, glitter explodes behind her): “Attention Townies! Today is the one day of the year where screaming is encouraged and mortality is optional!”

  QUICK CUT TO: CAST OUTSIDE THE PARK ENTRANCE.

  STIX (arms crossed, already pissed): “I hate this place. I hate rides. I hate overpriced snacks. I hate joy.”

  ZORA (slapping him on the back): “Oh come on, you haven’t even gotten inside yet!”

  STIX (squinting at a sign): “…Children under five ride free, children over five are replaced with balloons’? …That’s a threat.”

  [INT. AMUSEMENT PARK – MIDDAY]

  (The cast walks in. Immediately a guy is launched from a spinning ride and lands in cotton candy. He’s fine.)

  QUICK MONTAGE:

  Princess eats an entire funnel cake in one bite. It screams.

  Zora wins a strength test, the hammer shatters, and the bell explodes. She then celebrates her victory by Summonings cats.

  Rudy uses toon logic to beat every claw machine instantly.

  Quibble throws a ball at a dunk tank—misses—and somehow dunks himself instead.

  [INT. TUNNEL OF LOVE – A SMALL BOAT FLOATS]

  RUDY (sighs): “This town never slows down, huh?”

  QUIBBLE (laughs nervously, looking away): “Yeah… kinda like my heartbeat around you.”

  (Pause. Realizes what he just said.)

  QUIBBLE: “…I mean around adrenaline. I mean you. I MEAN—”

  RUDY (smirking): “So what, I’m your adrenaline now?”

  QUIBBLE (sinks in his seat): “I wish this tunnel was longer.”

  (The tunnel extends another 50 feet just so suddenly!)

  RUDY (breaking 4th wall): “…This series really loves comedic timing, huh?”

  (Camera zooms in on a bored intern pulling a “Stretch Tunnel” lever.)

  QUIBBLE: “Er… over here… not the readers…”

  [INT. FERRIS WHEEL – STIX + ZORA]

  Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

  (Stix is gripping the bar. They’re stuck at the top.)

  STIX (yelling): “I SWEAR IF THIS THING DROPS I’M SUING THE CONCEPT OF FUN.”

  ZORA: “Dude. Just relax. Not everything’s gonna kill you.”

  (Ferris wheel groans violently.)

  STIX: “That’s exactly what it said before it divorced me, girl.”

  ZORA: “You were married to a ride?”

  STIX: “I don’t want to talk about it… NOW SHUT UP!”

  [INT. PARK GROUNDS – LATER]

  WADE (walking with Rudy & Quibble): “You guys ever think about how weird we all are?”

  RUDY: “Constantly.”

  PRINCESS: “I have a quantum physics book, and inside it lies an endless collection of quantum physics books. Is that weird?”

  QUIBBLE: “I keep a diary.”

  WADE: “…We live in a town where the sun blinks sometimes. We can’t die permanently.. so reincarnation happens across the world. We can remove our heads and limbs.. I’m… literal liquid..”

  (Camera cuts to the sun literally blinking.)

  SUN: “What? You never seen a star nap?”

  Carrie: “Well, we all have some kind of liquid inside us!”

  Stix: “That can be taken out of… ugh nevermind..”

  [INT. HAUNTED FUNHOUSE – PRINCESS]

  (Princess stares at herself in a cracked mirror. Her reflection doesn’t mimic her.)

  PRINCESS: “Who’s in control? Me? Or the script?”

  MIRROR: “You know the answer…”

  (She smiles—but it’s different. Twisted. Too wide.)

  PRINCESS: “…Time’s almost up.”

  (She twirls around and skips away. The mirror stays cracked as the room no longer darkens after he leaves)

  [INT. BENCHES NEAR EXIT – NIGHT]

  (The cast relaxes, eating glow-in-the-dark cotton candy and corn dogs with teeth.)

  STIX (still furious): “I got stuck on a ride called the ‘Spin Until Regret’ for four damn hours. My spleen’s still orbiting Saturn.”

  RUDY: “I actually liked it.”

  STIX: “That’s because you were born in chaos. I was born in accounting.”

  RUDY: “Have you always been this grumpy? Heh..”

  STIX: “STILL don’t wanna talk about… it..”

  [INT. QUIBBLE SITS ALONE NEAR A FOUNTAIN – RUDY JOINS HIM]

  RUDY: “Hey.”

  QUIBBLE (holding a prize): “I won you a plush. It’s… a squirrel? Or a lawyer. I don’t know.”

  SKULLY: “I do.”

  RUDY (smiles): “I love legally accurate squirrels.”

  QUIBBLE: “I think you’re the only one who actually makes this town feel normal...”

  RUDY: “Normal’s overrated. I like when you dunk yourself trying to win me plushies. Wait, why are you acting like this?”

  (They sit silently. Just looking at the moon. It winks at them. A firework goes off—making Rudy flinch a little)

  [INT. EXIT GATES – EVERYONE HEADING OUT]

  PRINCESS (to herself, monotone): “They’ll all see soon. This happiness… it’s borrowed time.”

  (The camera lingers. Her shadow splits into two briefly—then merges again.)

  [POST-CREDITS – THEME PARK PARKING LOT]

  (A single bumper car slowly rolls out. No one’s in it.)

  VOICE (UNSEEN): “They’re waking up. Good.”

  END OF EPISODE 8