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2.28: Hands That Hold and Break Free

  2.28: Hands That Hold and Break FreeWe kissed and cuddled for a while, softly rubbing our bodies against each other. It felt like my bones had turned to jelly for several different reasons. I was deeply in love, filled with admiration for Aoi-chan, with a tiny edge of fear eating at me too—the lingering feeling of being so powerless. Anxiety twisted my stomach while my heart throbbed as we kissed.

  There was a quiet moment afterward, the two of us sitting side by side on the old mat, leaning against each other and enjoying each other’s warmth.

  Finally, I spoke, “Is your hand okay?”

  She smiled at me. “It would take more than a cheap Chinese knock-off to hurt my hand.”

  Even though she brushed off my worry, I picked up her hand and held it, brushing my lips against it. I froze the moment I did, blushing hard.

  She’s my girlfriend now, right? Th-this is totally normal after all the kissing… r-right?

  She turned her hand, showing me her palm with a gentle smile.

  “You could kiss this side too.”

  I blushed and fidgeted for a moment. She waited, just long enough that she was about to pull her hand away, and then I pressed my lips against the red marks. I felt relieved that I didn’t taste blood. I couldn’t help resting my cheek against her palm afterward.

  I liked how that felt.

  “I’m gd, m-my g-g-girlfriend…” I mumbled.

  Aoi-chan giggled. “I like hearing you say that. You’re too cute, Sumire,” she breathed, stroking my hair gently.

  I blushed and snuggled against her hand, as if the act itself could heal the red marks.

  After a moment, she said, “As much as I’d love to stay here with you all night, I have club activities to finish. Don’t forget that you’re going home with me again.” Her tone brooked no argument as she stood, brushed the dust off her gym shorts and legs, and gave her gym shirt a quick shake. “So wait for me behind the gym. I’ll be done soon.”

  “If you were doing your club activities, how did you know what was happening to me?” I asked, watching her take a step away and feeling like the forlorn waif she said I wasn’t in my memories.

  She looked over her shoulder, flipping her ponytail. “I just had a weird intuition that my girlfriend was in trouble. It’s funny how quickly I found you, isn’t it?” she said thoughtfully. “It’s probably the red thread of fate connecting us.”

  DOKI-DOKI… BADUMP

  “Just wait behind the gym? Could I go to the cssroom and help out there to pass the time?” I asked, fidgeting.

  “Yes, but also get into your gym clothes. Come to think of it, we might as well get started with things tonight. But be sure to be waiting there for me whatever you do while waiting. Just a little longer and I’ll be all yours again.” Aoi winked and extended her hand. She helped me stand, and I dusted off my bzer and skirt, shaking them cleaner, unable to suppress a sneeze. My uniform had picked up more dust than her gym shirt and shorts.

  “Such a cute sneeze.” Aoi smiled. “If I had my bag with me, I’d loan you my handkerchief.”

  I sniffled blushing as we left the deserted wing of the school on the third floor and parted ways on the second floor. She held my hand as though I might fall down the stairs.

  I wasn’t sure what to do other than going back to homeroom, but I clung to her words like a lifeline as I joined the st students staying back to help with cleaning.

  I cleaned Pon-chan’s cage and made sure he had plenty of water and food pellets. The few that had lingered hadn’t gotten around to taking care of him yet.

  The building slowly emptied, growing quieter in steady increments every ten minutes. I could hear the distant echo of whistles from the athletic field outside and the squeak of shoes against polished floors.

  I already missed Aoi-chan, even though she was just with her club. I couldn’t help smiling wistfully about how silly I was being. I’d just gotten a girlfriend for the first time and part of me wanted all of her attention. My face heated up, thinking about her. That hadn’t happened before today.

  DOKI-DOKI

  Wasn’t it weird that I wasn’t thinking it was weird that I hadn’t wanted a boyfriend? Most girls wanted that. Was I weird?

  I rested my hands in front of me at my waist, csped over my skirt, gazing out the homeroom window as guilt tugged at me for several reasons.

  Is she being scolded by her seniors or her coach right now… all because of me? The way she left practice like that might have gotten her in trouble.

  Eventually, I left and headed for the disconnected gymnasium building myself, exiting cssroom 2-B, walking down the hallway to the stairs and going down a flight. My feet carried me to the shoe lockers out front where I swapped my shoes. Only a few other students were still around. I walked past the bike rack. My mamachari was one of the few bikes still parked in it. I walked past and up the path to the gymnasium. When I reached it, I pushed inside and crept along the wall so I wouldn’t be in the way.

  Aoi was in motion. I caught sight of her as she intercepted the volleyball, her body moving with sharp, practiced precision.Her eyes flicked to me as I passed—and she smiled.

  DOKI-DOKI

  I smiled back, slipping my arms behind my back as I headed into the locker room to change.

  She’s so amazing…

  My fingers were a little clumsy as I unbuttoned my bzer and set it aside, along with my button-up blouse. I unfastened my skirt and stepped out of it, bending to lift it and hang it in the locker before pulling on my gym clothes. A few girls were still changing nearby. They looked at me, but noticing that I was avoiding looking at them at all as usual, giving them an unintentional cold shoulder, I hoped that they wouldn’t talk to me. I felt far too awkward here for some strange reason that I didn’t understand. Their st bits of chatter drifted out the door as they left together. They sounded like they were good friends, teasing each other lightly and talking about homework assignments and boys they liked.

  For a moment, a strange little shiver ran through me.

  It’s because I don’t really belong here…

  The thought was soft and instinctive, almost like someone else’s memory brushing against mine crifying my confusion.

  But then I inhaled, shook my head, and the confusion dissolved, just not entirely.

  This is the girls’ locker room… Why… Why am I so weird about it? No… I’m being silly and nervous over nothing. This is completely normal. This is my school. I’m a girl. I belong here.

  I finished tugging my gym shirt into pce and tied my hair back, my motions smoothing out as my body remembered a routine I’d repeated many times before for PE.

  Aoi slipped into the locker room a minute ter, her ponytail now damp with sweat as though the sight of me had inspired her to practice harder for the st minutes. Her gym shirt was darkened with it too, especially around the armpits, her lower back, and beneath her breasts. She looked like she’d sprinted straight from practice again into the girl’s locker room.

  I gasped quietly, enjoying the stirring sight of her like this. Aoi-chan was so beautiful and radiant even when she was sweaty, stray strands of hair sticking to her face.

  “You told me to meet you behind the gym, didn’t you?” I said, smiling.

  “Sorry,” she said, her breathing a little uneven as she giggled. “Maybe I was hoping I’d catch you before you got changed.” She winked.

  I blushed, looking away. “Ecchi…” I fumbled my fingers around each other, fidgeting and forced myself to add, “Um… how did running off earlier go over?”

  Aoi smirked at being called a pervert and didn’t comment on it. “Kind of. They wanted to know why I vanished right as we were getting warmed up for practice. I yelled that there was an emergency and darted off.”

  “You really yelled it out like that?” I asked softly, looking at her, feeling kind of amused.

  “Yeah. I couldn’t do it any other way. There was no time to argue. My Sumire tingle sense was going off like crazy.” She struck a silly pose. “I’m sure I’d always know if you were in trouble. And I’d always come running.” As she spoke the st words confidently as she put her hand on my head.

  I gasped, my heart fluttering all the more. “But you’ll get in trouble if you keep doing stuff like that…”

  “Yeah. So what?” She gave me a ft look that melted almost immediately into a gentler gaze, making the flutters even stronger.

  The back of the gymnasium building smelled like sun-warmed concrete and recently mowed grass. The te afternoon light had turned golden, casting long shadows over us past a chain-link fence that ringed the field. Cicadas droned zily in the trees along the perimeter wall.

  Aoi deposited her bag against the wall and stepped onto the packed earth, rolling her shoulders. Her entire aura shifted. The pyful, sweet Aoi-chan melted away as she warmed up, and a much more serious Aoi took her pce. Her stance straightened, her gaze on me sharpening.

  I swallowed hard.

  “Alright, Sumire-chan,” she said, pnting her hands on her hips. “From today, this is our dojo.”

  “Okay?” I said softly. “I wonder if anyone will peek at us here.”

  “Keep your mind out of the gutter,” she smiled. “We’re just training you, as tempted I am to kiss you the whole time,” she said solemnly. “If they want to watch, they can watch all they want. Here we have plenty of space and privacy.” She started stretching slowly. “You should do the same. Treat this like any athletic event or P.E.”

  “…You’re… really something else,” I whispered softly as I watched her.

  Her body was really toned, more than I’d noticed. She moved with a precision that I couldn’t help admiring.

  She didn’t comment but smiled.

  After a moment I started stretching with her, the same way that she was.

  “Good. Keep that up.” She grinned. “You’ll be amazing too when I’m done with you. You can count on that. Ready to get started?”

  I nodded, blushing.

  She stepped closer and took my wrists gently, guiding me to stand facing her. The earth was firm underfoot. The faint shouts of students in their club activities were carried on the wind, but back here, it felt like our own little pocket of the world filled with soft echoes.

  “First things first,” Aoi said. “Let’s correct your stance. Remember what I show you. I’m going to make sure that you move a certain way instinctively.”

  She nudged my feet apart with her own, bare toes brushing my ankles. She adjusted the angles of my knees, then slid a hand to the small of my back and pressed lightly there.

  “Don’t lean so much forward… Sink down a little more. Now imagine a string pulling the top of your head up and your tailbone down.”

  She stepped behind me, close enough that I could feel her body heat against my back.

  Her hands slid along my arms, lowering my shoulders.

  Her breath warmed my ear.

  DOKI-DOKI-DOKI

  “I-I’m not going to survive this training,” I mumbled.

  “You will,” she said matter-of-factly. “And then you’ll be able to flick those kinds of creeps away.”

  Her tone made me feel rexed.

  “You know… I don’t have any talent for this kind of thing. I’m so gentle and… weak.” I protested. “I’ve never… done anything like martial arts. My body probably won’t remember anything you teach me. I froze back then when my wrist was grabbed… I’m a coward.”

  “For now, that’s understandable. That’s our starting point,” Aoi said firmly. She stepped around to face me again, her blue eyes steady. “You don’t need a lot of courage yet. You just need to commit to changing a little by little so that you never freeze again. I will give you what you need to blossom. Your job is to show up and work hard for me, no matter how hard it gets.”

  “But—”

  “Sumire,” she said seriously.

  The way she said my name left no room to argue.

  “You have good reflexes,” she said. “I know you. That body of yours is made to do much more than you think. There was a time when a cabinet door almost hit you weeks ago. You flinched away faster than most people would even register the movement. We’re going to tap that instinctive passive skill of yours with your training—”

  She bent down, looking like she was touching her toes, but without warning, she tossed a stray twig from the ground at my face.

  My hand snapped up and caught it.

  I stared at the twig in my fingers, confused.

  “What was that for?” I was unable to stop myself from giggling.

  “That’s what I was talking about.” Aoi smiled. “See? Your body doesn’t know what to do yet. But it wants to move in moments of ‘danger’. That’s our starting point.”

  I tossed the twig onto the ground with a soft ugh.

  “… But that wasn’t anything… it was just flinching and reacting…”

  “Most would have been hit by that twig. You caught it princess.” Her smile turned smug. “So stop saying you have no talent. I wouldn’t be wasting my time if you were completely hopeless.”

  You really are hopeless, Susu.

  I frowned for a moment.

  I wonder who told me that? Neither Dad or Mom would. I thought about my chief critic, my little brother, Haru. It was very much the kind of thing he would say to me. We’d never agreed on much. He didn’t call me nee, onee, or anything else.

  My chest tightened.

  “What were you thinking about? Your face got kind of sad. I need you to think about what we’re doing.” Aoi half-admonished me, asking.

  “Oh… I was just thinking about how hopeless I am. You really are hopeless, Susu.” I smiled wryly.

  Aoi’s lips twisted and she looked away for a moment and back at me, resting her fingers beneath my chin.

  “Whoever called you that probably loves you more than anyone else,” Aoi said.

  “What?!” I blushed. “How does that even connect?”

  “You know how it is. Some people can’t help teasing the people they love the most.” Aoi wagged her finger at me. “Anyway, I need you to take this training as seriously as me.”

  “Okay…” I whispered. “I’ll try my best.”

  “That’s more like it.” She lowered her hand to squeeze my shoulder. “Now. Lesson one: getting away when someone grabs you.”

  My throat closed briefly.

  The equipment room bckmail incident fshed in my mind again. The door. Their hands on me. Their phone fshing pictures of us. My frozen legs.

  Aoi’s gaze softened.

  Her hand slid down my arm, taking my wrist again.

  “Look,” she said quietly. “If some idiot grabs you like I am right now…”

  She caught my wrist, tightening just enough to make my skin prickle with the panicked memory of capture.

  “Most people panic and pull straight back when grabbed,” she said. “That’s what they expect. Especially if they’re stronger than you. You just waste energy.”

  She tugged slightly. Instinctively, I yanked backward.

  “Exactly like you just did. In this case, your instincts were wrong.” She shook her head, then shifted my arm. “Instead… you rotate. Aim for the weak point where their thumb and fingers meet. Wrench toward that.”

  She guided my hand, helping me twist my wrist and rotate my body. In one smooth motion, her grip fell away and she let my arm swing free and then nudged my palm toward her shoulder as if to push her off.

  “This is a combo that gives you some space. If you turn the right way, even I have to let go,” she said. “And if I’m off bance, the shove will give you time to run. Now you try it on me.”

  “What? I can’t just—”

  “Now grab me,” she repeated, more softly but firmly. “Please. I’d rather you practice on me than jerks like them.”

  Why would I ever want to grab them?! What’s the point of this?

  Hesitantly, my fingers closed around her wrist, even though I couldn’t figure out why she was teaching me how to grab someone else.

  She looked absurdly calm, letting me hold her like that, like there was no world in which I could ever hurt her. Of course she wouldn’t panic like me, especially with me grabbing her. She was her and I was gentle.

  “I’m you right now. You’re your attackers. You’ve grabbed me just now—”

  She slipped her wrist free quickly, reversed, and caught mine again in the same grip as before, smoother than I’d done it, resting her hand against my shoulder without pushing.

  “There we go. Now you try again.” She grabbed my wrist. “Do it yourself. Rotate my hand outward. Step like I did. Don’t think about being the usual gentle you. Think about escaping.”

  I swallowed and followed her instructions.

  My hand rotated. My feet moved.

  Her fingers slipped off my wrist, and this time it was my arm that came free, my palm nding against her shoulder, ready to shove if I needed to.

  I stared, stunned.

  “Huh?”

  “You did it. Just once.” Aoi smirked. “Now do it a hundred more times so your brain doesn’t short out next time you’re grabbed.”

  By the twentieth repetition, my wrists ached, my legs burned, and my shirt clung damply to my back. Aoi never raised her voice the whole time, never mocking my clumsiness. When I fumbled, she adjusted my posture and movements gently. When I tensed up, she reminded me to breathe.

  “Good,” she murmured softly, approving. “Again.”

  The sun dipped lower, the light shifting from gold to amber.

  At some point, I realized we weren’t entirely alone anymore.

  Someone was standing at the corner of the gym.

  At first, I thought it might be a teacher who had come to watch us and possibly reprimand us for what had happened earlier in the abandoned wing. To make matters worse, we weren’t an officially registered club. However, the figure did not move from where they stood. They simply leaned against the wall and watched us.

  My breath caught.

  “Aoi-chan…” I whispered, careful not to stare in their direction.

  “I know,” she murmured back without turning. “I noticed too.”

  She grabbed my wrist again, and I automatically spun out of the hold, shoving her back a step.

  “I’ll have to teach you how to hold someone who wants to break away sometime as well. That’s called grappling,” she said aloud, clearly projecting her voice. “Anyway, you’re already better at escaping than you were this afternoon.”

  “Why would I need to learn how to grab someone?” I asked, frowning.

  Aoi smiled. “Because grappling is part of fighting. Did you really think this was all you’d be learning from me?”

  I shook my head, smiling faintly. “No. I didn’t think that.”

  A faint cp echoed from the corner.

  Tachibana Riko stepped into view. She was still in her uniform, her bzer draped over one arm, her school bag slung casually over her shoulder. Her long, graceful legs and calm, confident gait made it seem as though she belonged anywhere, even here, even while openly watching us.

  “What do you want?” Aoi asked ftly.

  Riko paused for a moment, her eyes moving between us as she considered her words. “I was wondering what the two of you were doing back here,” she said, stepping closer with her usual calm, unreadable smile. “I saw you running out of the gymnasium earlier, Kurobane-san. You looked serious enough that I couldn’t help following to see what was going on. You headed to the abandoned wing on the third floor, and then I saw you go into the unused storage room at the end.”

  She continued evenly, “I waited and thought it over. Not long after that, two senpai came running out. They were limping. That suggested something had happened. After that, neither of you came out for a while.”

  Aoi’s jaw tightened. “What are you pying at, Tachibana-san? Are you stalking us now?”

  Riko lifted a hand to her chest, feigning mild offense. “Stalker is such a harsh word,” she murmured. “I happened to see you sprinting off and got curious. There’s nothing keeping me from going to the third floor if I want to. It was especially interesting when I ter saw you walking downstairs with Shinohara-san. I didn’t follow you then. Instead, I checked the room and noticed the mess you left behind.”

  “Are you pnning to tell the staff?” Aoi asked, her eyes narrowing.

  “No. That isn’t my style,” Riko replied calmly. “I won’t tell anyone. But I was curious. There was a faint scent of burnt circuits in the air, and the phone there had clearly been broken very recently. That means something happened involving it. Whose phone was it?”

  “None of your business,” Aoi said.

  “I see.” Riko leaned back against the wall, unbothered.

  “Then why are you poking your nose where it isn’t wanted?” Aoi pressed.

  Riko’s gaze shifted between us. “Naturally, I was concerned.”

  Her eyes settled on me.

  The concern there seemed genuine.

  I shrank slightly under the attention. “I’m fine,” I said quickly, then winced as I flexed my hand a little too much.

  A faint twinge shot up my wrist. A mild sprain from training.

  Riko’s expression sharpened.

  “You’re not fine,” she said quietly. Then, as she looked away, she added, “I’m fairly perceptive. I’ve always enjoyed figuring things out.”

  She stepped closer and looked directly into my eyes. I retreated a step, but she was close enough that I could see tiny flecks of gold in her brown irises. Her presence was calm and steady, almost uncomfortably so.

  “You were practicing breakaways because those senpai tried something with you. That phone belonged to them, not you…” Her eyes lowered to waist level. “And I can tell that your wrist is strained from overuse.”

  Without asking permission, she took my hand, not to grapple, but to turn my wrist over and apply gentle pressure along the underside. She rubbed the area carefully.

  “You’re overworking your joints with this training,” she said. “It’s probably your first time doing anything like this. Even so, it’s impressive. You’re learning quickly.”

  She released my hand after a moment and csped her own behind her back, as if to reassure me that she meant no harm.

  “Thank you for not using the technique she just taught you on me,” Riko added lightly.

  I smiled faintly in response. “...It’s not that bad,” I protested. “I mean, Aoi-chan is going easy on me. I’m just not used to this kind of thing yet.”

  “I can tell,” Riko said. “A girl’s body is delicate in some pces and strong in others. If you don’t take care of the delicate parts, the strong ones never get the chance to grow.”

  “What are you trying to do, Tachibana-san?” Aoi snapped. “Shouldn’t you be crushing on Kurosawa-sensei instead of my girlfriend?”

  I gasped, my face burning.

  She said it to someone else.

  DOKI-DOKI… BADUMP

  “Maybe,” Riko replied with a grin. “But do you really think that’s all there is to me?” She tilted her head thoughtfully. “Girlfriends, huh. Is that true, Shinohara-san?”

  I hesitated, then nodded.

  “That’s cute,” Riko said. “Truthfully, I’ve been watching both of you for a while, even if it looks like I only pay attention to Kurosawa-sensei.” She gestured toward us. “Kurobane-san has a very fit body. It’s obvious how hard she trains. But even after noticing that, someone interested me even more.”

  “Who?” I asked, honestly confused.

  “You,” Riko replied.

  I blushed and stepped back.

  “Why?” Aoi demanded, stepping closer in an unmistakably threatening way.

  Riko giggled. “Scary. But I’ll answer honestly. Sumire never trained before now. She doesn’t work out, and she never stood out in P.E. or fitness events. Yet her body is extremely athletic. I wanted to know why. Have you been training secretly, Shinohara-san?”

  I blinked, looking down at myself, unsure.

  “You’re too perceptive,” Aoi muttered. “You get a pass.”

  Riko’s eyes lit up. “So you won’t chase me off if I watch you train?”

  “Unless you annoy me,” Aoi replied.

  “Fair,” Riko ughed.

  “Tachibana-san…” My voice came out small. “Why do you think my body looks like that to her? I’m really just me. I belong to the go-home club. I read manga and sometimes copy idol dances in front of the television. That’s it.”

  “Reading manga isn’t physical enough to build muscles unless you’re a hopeless binge reader,” Riko said, amused.

  “Yeah, but dancing is,” I said quickly, trying to defend myself a little.

  “True, but that still doesn’t fully expin your body,” she replied. “That’s all.”

  Her eyes flicked briefly to Aoi, then returned to me, thoughtful.

  “Leave it at that,” Aoi warned.

  Riko nodded and looked back at me. “If she pushes you so hard that you can’t even lift your chopsticks at lunch, come see me. I’m good at soothing tired muscles. My little sisters use me as a pillow all the time.”

  Aoi immediately stepped between us, decisive and territorial.

  “She won’t be using your thighs as a pillow,” Aoi said.

  Riko smiled, amused rather than offended. “Maybe.”

  Her gaze drifted to Aoi’s hands, still faintly red from crushing Koji’s phone. Admiration, curiosity, and something warmer mixed in her expression.

  “You’re strong,” Riko said. “And loyal. I like that.”

  “That’s enough,” Aoi said. “Go.”

  Riko let the words slide past her.

  “Don’t overdo it, Shinohara-san,” she said gently. “It would be a shame if you came to hate something that could make you stronger.”

  She bowed politely, then turned and walked toward the front of the school, her silhouette long against the soft red light of the te afternoon.

  I exhaled slowly.

  “She’s kind of cool,” I muttered.

  “Don’t say that in front of me again,” Aoi said immediately, annoyed.

  “S-sorry!”

  “And wipe that look off your face,” she added, pinching my cheek possessively. “Look only at me.”

  Heat rushed through me. Being wanted so openly and fiercely made my chest ache and loosen at the same time.

  Something that had been bruised for a long time finally eased.

  Aoi’s presence stitched me back together without even trying.

  Relwing

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