Selfish Desires

  “Took you guys long enough,” spoke Kor, who was the first to notice them arriving.

  “H-hey.” Ty let out a breath a relief upon spotting the rest of her class chatting around a tomecart.

  After Alex, Cyril, Callie, and Faris met up with her and Sel at noon, they had taken a different mapped path than the one she had originally planned on—and all because of the encounter with the two Eletian soldiers. Heading north and away from Lake Lachesis, then east again on a rougher, less populated path through the forest, what truly mattered was that they were still going to meet the rest of the class at the other end of the forest, at the Township of Thaon, but that didn’t dispel the uneasy feeling in her stomach urging her to reconsider the entire trip.

  Who knows? Maybe everyone’s just waiting for something big to push us all over the edge.

  Theo, who was busy staring into the distance at the grandiose eastern MATS head office jutting out from the middle of the town, spun when he heard the tactician’s weak greeting.

  “Oh, you’re all okay,” he said, not looking particularly relieved to see them. “We arrived a bit earlier than usual. I had to apply a cloaking spell to the cart. There must be an unplanned demonstration here tonight…”

  Eyeing the group and leaning on the tomecart with Korinna, Elias shrugged dispassionately. “Some things never change. The east is always in conflict, it’s almost always Eletia, and everyone knows they hate magic. Isn’t that why we’re here?”

  Kor sighed, shooting Elias a wry look. “I ain’t about to fight an entire army with civilians around, thank you very much.”

  To quell her own anxiety and seize control of the situation, Ty shooed the two students away from the tomecart. “No one’s fighting yet. Let’s get this tomecart reset and organize ourselves.”

  Before reinitialising the cart, sending it back to its station of origin, Ty checked the navigation history. Theo had not been lying—a cloaking spell had been added to the log approximately thirty minutes ago, which must have been when they approached the border between the central and eastern states. That did not bode well.

  “Who here’s from the east again?”

  When the cart started moving, Ty turned back to face the group. “Elias, Cyril, and I,” she replied to Kor absentmindedly while reviewing her notes.

  “Well, Elias makes sense,” replied the chemist dismissively. “Cyril’s a royal on the side, so that makes sense too. But you, Ty?”

  Ty ran her finger down a list of coordinates and rested her gaze upon the MATS building in the distance like Theo—she had organized lodging for the night near the office so they could take a break and not have to tread through the forest overnight. Supplies were unnecessary at this point, and the official exam wouldn’t be for another week, so it made sense to set off right before dawn again. As for the next part of their journey, they could take the main road straight to the beach, or they could again choose the path less taken through the Brightwoods. They had no ulterior motives, and they had no reason to be accosted by anyone, state-affiliated or not, but were there other options she hadn’t considered?

  “Your mother was a teacher at MATS, was she not? Do you live around here?”

  No, these parts were becoming increasingly dangerous, and it made little sense to travel through the main road that connected the Township of Thaon and Eletia, no matter the time. Taking the rougher path seemed best, and though the odds of getting into a fight weren’t nil, being shrouded by the woods posed the least risk. Besides, Kor’s initial sentiment was right—any conflict should not take place in an area where innocent civilians could be hurt.

  Ty stuffed her notebook back into her pocket and took out her Tactician’s tome, looking up when she realized how silent it was.

  Everyone was staring at her.

  “Yes?” She blinked a few times before recalling the question that had been directed at her. “N-no, I’m not from this area. I live near the beach. We’re going to spend the night here and then head out before dawn.” She then opened her book to a blank page near the back before extending it out to her class. “Now, so I make sure everyone gets back safely, hands out.”

  Without a single peep, everyone obediently gathered in a circle around the book and laid five fingers flat on anywhere there was space on the open pages.

  Ty began the binding immediately after the last hand touched the pages, speaking quickly and accurately under her breath. Glowing, deep red lines appeared on the book as she spoke, reaching for every fingertip before solidifying, until the entire page shone red.

  “The contract hereby begins, binding all to duty.”

  Watching the red slowly fade to white, leaving a brand-new page again, Ty pocketed back the tome. “Okay,” she tested to make sure she was attuned to the group so that only they could hear. “Everyone is free to do what they want tonight, but make sure to be back at the lodgings by midnight. I’ll go first and mark it with a tactician’s spell, so you’ll be able to see it. Try to stick in groups of two or three, preferably in your designated squads.”

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  She took a deep breath, running over the instructions she had been mulling over while in the forest. “Now listen carefully, because I won’t repeat it in the morning: we reconvene here at dawn, 06h00. We’ll head north, away from town, in our defensive formation. Alex and Faris will be at the back with the healer, and Elias and Callie in the middle. Between them and me at the front will be the non-combat students. The land between here and the Brightwoods is relatively flat after it dips down leading out of the city, so it should take about four hours to arrive. When we do, provided there are no foreseeable risks, we will continue through the woods. The area is rocky, and there will be sharp dips in elevation, but it should level out two hours before we expect to arrive, right before the sun sets. Any questions?”

  Of all the people it could have been, Theo was the one to speak up. “Is there a reason we can’t go around the forest? The terrain would be far easier—”

  “No,” rejected Ty without even listening to the rest.

  Theo did not back down. “There aren’t any state settlements around there, and it’ll save us at least an hour, not to mention it’ll be less grueling.”

  Ty shook her head. “We can’t take any risks—I’d rather we weren’t seen at all.”

  “But, like, why?”

  The class turned to Elias.

  “We’re not doing anything wrong. We’re just heading to the beach. We could even take the merchant route down to Eletia, especially given the time frame. Why are we intentionally taking the tough way when we’re not doing anything wrong?”

  She held her ground, shifting to a stricter tone. “The situation isn’t that cut-and-dry. There’s no guarantee we won’t be accosted, so to avoid as much conflict as possible, we—”

  “I-I think I agree with Elias and Theo,” Alex interjected this time, albeit slightly nervously. “We’re not doing anything wrong. If they stop us, we can just say that we’re heading to the beach.”

  At a loss, never having had to argue with her classmates about directions before—granted, this was their first mission without a professor to lead the way—Ty could only look at her classmates’ questioning gazes. “I…” she began, feeling her determination wane.

  Are you going to take responsibility if one of us gets hurt? she should have said aloud.

  “Let’s go toward the woods, like you suggest,” offered Theo kindly. “But instead of heading through it, we’ll circle around. That way we can avoid the main road. I think that’s a fair compromise.”

  Ty turned her head to Theo, not even trying to hide her irritation. “This shouldn’t even be a question of compromise,” she protested through gritted teeth. “I’m your tactician—there’s absolutely no rush for any of this, and I’m trying to minimize—”

  “The forest isn’t completely risk free, either,” rebutted her physician. “You’re just considering the risk of commoners.”

  “Y’know, some animals could be even w—”

  “Fine!” hissed the tactician, turning around and heading back into the woods so she could take the long way around to their lodgings for the night, stuffing her hands into her pockets and digging her fingernails into the palms of her hands. “Do what you want. I don’t care.”

  * * *

  One. Another sin to seek forgiveness for.

  Ty scowled as she dismissed the blue saber sticking out of the chest of a large patrolman and knelt down to pick up his breastplate. “Tell me what this means,” she snapped as she forced it into the hands of the classmate beside her.

  “It means there’s one less person to fight,” replied her partner quietly, expression somber as he looked down at an Eletian seal as clear as day. “And…maybe we should have listened to you.”

  The tactician stepped into the forest and turned to the left. “Faris and Alex, update.”

  “Dispatched,” responded the caster apathetically.

  Another.

  “Good,” she muttered. “Cyril, take care of the body.”

  “Understood.”

  She turned to the right, looking down the forest path—darkness and a slight rustling in the trees. “Callie?”

  “Almost done. I’m with Kor and hers.”

  “Good,” she repeated with less annoyance in her voice, finally looking behind her at Theo returning from outside the thicket. The corpse was no longer where she had left it. “We’ll reconvene down the forest path, at Elias’s position. Should be ten minutes from you, Alex.”

  “Understood,” replied Alex quietly.

  Hastily rushing down the path, Ty felt slightly better now that it was all under control, but the sensation did not last long as she approached Callie.

  Three more sins.

  “Are you okay?” asked the support.

  “Yes,” she dismissed quickly, doing a visual check of everyone’s clothes and weapons as she arrived. Nothing was out of place. Clean. They had been given the easier task out of the three groups: while they felled the immediate threats, Ty took the one who had appeared from the side to flank them, Alex the one from behind, and the remaining three chased after the runaways that had been detected far in advance. There was no room for error.

  She looked behind her, eyes detecting no movement. “Alex, how far?”

  “Five minutes.”

  “Good, we’ll keep walking. We’ve just got a few hours to go. You’ll catch up easily.”

  Silently, and without any words of reproach, Ty continued to lead her class down the forest trail. The remaining three, as expected, caught up quickly.

  They crossed a bridge, up a hill and then down it, over a river that she knew well from her childhood, past a high cliff that overlooked a large field and even larger body of water accessible through a fork in the road they didn’t take, countless trees and shrubs, some patches of poisonous flora, some edible fruit bushes, even a pair of deer who ran away the moment they were spotted, but not once—not once did they encounter anyone else as they finally made it out of the forest.

  “Wow,” spoke Callie first, eyes glittering as she stood beside Ty, who had stopped to bathe in the nostalgia and remember just how selfish she had been to take them all here despite the dangers. Where it had all begun. Where it would end.

  The smell of the water. The sound of it. Golden sunlight danced on its surface, stretching for eternity.

  “It’s beautiful,” breathed Selene, letting go of Kor’s hand and walking forward, gasping slightly when her feet sank slightly in the hot sand.

  One by one, everyone made their way onto the beach, toward the sea. Kor, who went after Selene with a huge smile on her face; Alex, who practically sprinted after the first few steps; Darius, who took his shoes off first before effortlessly following Alex; Callie, who, after some hesitation and a bit of coaxing from Elias, made her way to everyone else by the waters; Cyril, who walked with ease and a carefree laugh; even Theo, who had never seen the sea before, made his way toward the water without her.

  “Have you ever seen the sea?”

  “No.”

  “Why don’t you go join your friends?”

  The silence between them was eclipsed by faraway laughter.

  She turned to look at him staring at the sea, studying his glassy, stunning violet eyes and saying nothing.

  There’s something there—I just know it. I can see it when he looks at you.

  She looked down. Took his hand in hers, grasping it tight enough so he could not pull away, and looked back up at him staring at her with nothing but childish innocence in his eyes.

  “Come on,” she smiled warmly. “Let’s go together.”