Closed Wounds

  After a long period of silence, Theo’s wavering eyes refocused on Ty, and he took a deep breath before shaking his head, the fear and panic nowhere to be found. “I know you may not want to hear this, but he’s still Em to me, Ty. It…it doesn’t matter what he’s called, or what he’s done. If Krastoff has taken him, or if he’s taken Krastoff. He raised me and loved me despite whatever changes he’s gone through.”

  “What if something happens to you?” she protested weakly. “What if you…what if you die?”

  His response was instantaneous, and that was when she knew that trying to change his mind was a fool’s errand. “I promise I won’t. And you’ll have to just trust me. Besides—” He reached into his shirt and pulled out the necklace she had made for him in their first year. “I have you here with me.”

  Still, Ty was not moved by his honeyed words. “I don’t understand. Why aren’t you more bothered by this?”

  Theo’s smile withered as he went to put away the first book. “Because he—they—saved me. They gave me hope. I told you before, but I was just answering a wanted ad. A day’s worth of labor—know how to read a few lines of text, didn’t need to be anyone special. And when he asked me to stay, to become his student, the look in his eyes…I finally felt like, for the first time in my life, there was someone out there who wanted me. That I was important to someone. It was love, and it was unconditional. Like he’d give up the world for me.”

  Ty put her hands in her face and exhaled shakily, starting to feel like they hadn’t really closed their wounds yesterday when Theo wrapped her up in his arms. “I’m not asking you to trust him, but I want you to understand that I also trust him too. Just like how I trust you. I know you’re telling me this for my own good, and I’m thankful. I’ll remember it, and I’ll live. If not to spite the world and the Earth Mother’s designs, then for you.”

  “Promise…you won’t die?”

  “I promise. And if I accidentally break it, I’ll look for—ah, what was it you said before—a little wooden cottage in the middle of the woods, steam rising from its chimney, up into a never-ending, eternally clear blue sky? An area at the front entrance where you could sit and feel the wind blow, listen to the trees with a book on your lap?”

  “…Mm.”

  * * *

  Sunlight was already streaming in through the common room window when Ty entered. Hair still half-wet, bag slung across her shoulder, she stood at the entrance and closed her eyes, savoring the smell of dusty books and morning rain.

  “Eh?”

  Her eyes fluttered open, tracing the source of the sound, which belonged to a half-awake student sleeping on the couch.

  “Have you always made it a habit to sleep in the common room?” she inquired neutrally, walking up to Cyril, who, upon seeing that it was Ty, immediately laid back down.

  “Maybe,” her classmate grinned from his couch and navy-blue blanket-cocoon, opening an eye to peek at Ty looking down at him. “I may have engaged in shenanigans. Speaking of, you look pleased, tactician.”

  She narrowed her eyes, the latter part of his sentence completely missing its mark. “Shenanigans? The last time you—”

  “Hey!” the healer quickly interrupted, sitting up to point an accusatory finger at Ty. “You’re denser than stone, but you can’t just ignore what I said like that!”

  “Shenanigans!” she protested, putting two hands on her hips.

  “You! Yesterday!” he protested back.

  “Luci!?”

  “Theo!?”

  “What do you mean, Theo?” Ty finally asked, straightening her back and feeling the corners of her mouth curl up to form a smile.

  When Cyril just stared at her with the same old mischievous grin on his face, eyes bright and not at all hazy with sleep, the words finally pierced through the giant monolith that was her brain.

  “W-what?” she stuttered. “We were—we were talking about you being suspicious!”

  “Hey, I almost got you for a moment!” he laughed loudly at the red-faced Ty.

  She attempted to push his hand away. “That doesn’t answer the question, you fool!” she laughed back.

  “You didn’t even understand what I was saying until I started yelling! So who’s actually the fool, huh? Huh!?” he cackled like a child, grabbing her hand that was pushing his away with his free one, inciting a small tug-of-war where no questions were answered and laughter that could have woken up the entire building bounced off the walls.

  “We’re all fools,” smiled Theo from the doorway, arms crossed and leaning on the wall with a soft smile on his face as he watched the two stop dead in their tracks.

  “She started it!” blurted Cyril first, pulling his hands out of Ty’s grasp and shuffling away with his blanket in tow, pointing when he was far away enough from her iron grip.

  Unable to stifle her laugh, Ty retracted her hands and ran them through her hair. “Yes, yes. I started it. Ready to go?”

  “Mhm.”

  As Theo approached, Ty turned her heel and started walking away, taking a moment before she opened the door to memorize how bright and innocent Cyril looked at that very moment, the childish gleam in his eyes that always brightened her day, even if by a little bit, his toothy smile. The soft pink blush in his cheeks that was emphasized by his impossibly fair skin, his shoulder-length jet-black hair that easily gave away his royal status, yet somehow messy enough to make you question whether it was a trick of the light. His deep brown eyes, which were comparable to Darius’s, always either soft and kind or strong and trusting. His slenderness despite being more athletic than some other classmates, almost doll-like and delicate.

  She paused.

  Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

  The way they both always said they should spend more time together. The way they somehow would never find the time. The way they were okay with that. Somehow. Just being within arm’s reach, yet close enough to understand that they didn’t need to spend time with each other to know there was warmth between them.

  “Thank you, Cyril,” she smiled before she turned back to open the door.

  He returned the same bittersweet look and bowed deeply until the door closed behind her and Theo.

  * * *

  “You two seemed like you were having fun.”

  Strolling through the chilly courtyard, she felt the gentle morning breeze caressing her damp hair. “Mm.”

  “Sorry if I interrupted anything.”

  “No, not at all,” she smiled to herself, looking down at the grass underneath her feet.

  “You seemed like you didn’t want to leave.”

  “Yeah,” she sighed softly.

  Side by side, they ascended the main lecture hall stairs.

  “Are you feeling okay?”

  Theo chuckled. “Yes.”

  “Do you need to hold my hand?”

  “For you to give me your anima? I’m not falling for that.”

  She held out her hand to him anyway as they ascended another flight of stairs. “An unlimited fountain of power, right here, ripe for the taking.”

  “You forget it’s not a one-way road, my dear,” grinned Theo coyly as he raised his hand to take hers, but not before she could retract hers.

  “Hey!” she objected as Theo placed his hand back on the strap of his book bag, still grinning from ear to ear.

  “It’s probably for the best, anyway,” he laughed lightheartedly as his pace began to slow down despite his confident words. “What will Luci think?”

  Ty could feel her smile waning. “I’m sure he’s used to it by now.”

  “I’m sure it doesn’t make it any easier.”

  Without needing the words spelled out for her this time, Ty looked down and nodded. “Yeah.” Then, building up the courage, she grabbed Theo’s hand anyway as they continued to walk, with no ulterior motives in mind.

  He yielded without protest, gripping tightly onto her hand and simply that, until they arrived at the last step before the ninth-floor landing.

  “What did I say?” whispered Theo before he plucked the class pin off her cloak and rushed to the front desk, where a familiar reports handler sat.

  Watching him go, finally letting go of the feeble smile she had struggled to maintain, she walked up to Class 2-B’s tactician, who was sitting on the ground by the stairs with a book in his lap.

  “Someone’s going to bump into you if you sit there,” Ty cooed softly.

  He raised his head, his eyes out of focus. “Oh. Ty.”

  She tucked the bottom of her cloak behind her legs and crouched down to his height, as if he were a child. “I kept you waiting. Sorry about that.”

  Luci shrugged, maintaining his distant gaze. “It hasn’t been long. I didn’t expect you to come, anyway.”

  “Sorry for avoiding you since that day.”

  “I thought we were going to talk?”

  It was her turn to look down, catching a glimpse of Luci’s book. “What are you reading?”

  “He left this at my place.”

  “Ah.”

  “When’s the next excursion? Or is it a mission this time?”

  She raised her head again, and Luci met her searching gaze. “Just an excursion next weekend.”

  “I’ll look forward to it, then.”

  And then he returned to his book, signifying the end of the conversation.

  “Are you doing alright?” she asked softly.

  “Yeah. Some things are clearer now.”

  Ty recalled that day in the library. “Was it Chel?”

  He nodded, just barely.

  “What did she say?”

  “She told me the most statistically probable fate for me. In this Circle, at least.”

  “Did she mention any others?”

  “One where we were happy.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “It doesn’t make me feel any different.”

  She sighed, hanging her head for a few seconds before standing up and offering a helping hand. “Come on. Let’s get you up.”

  For a fleeting moment, he seemed like he was going to refuse, but then he closed his book and grabbed Ty’s hand, letting himself be pulled up until she was the one looking up at him.

  “Hm. I feel kinda better now.” He tilted his head, offering his signature easygoing smile before giving her hand a squeeze and letting go. “You always find a way to do that.”

  Feeling the lingering tingle of anima in her hands, Ty put her hand back into her pocket and nodded with a smile. “I’m glad to hear that.”

  He tapped his lips, seemingly deep in thought. “Maybe I’ll return the tome. He’s back at the dorm, right?”

  She shook her head this time. “Please don’t get yourself hurt.”

  His eyes focused on her, and she could feel a chill run through her. “And why should I listen to you? It doesn’t matter what happens to me—it’ll all end up the same, won’t it?”

  “No, it won’t,” she whispered after a slight pause, clenching her fists. “It’s not going to be the same this time.”

  The look that he gave her at that moment was pitiful, and she could see in his eyes how much unspoken sadness there was behind it, how much of herself was in them.

  “Please don’t get yourself hurt,” she echoed, watching him turn his back on her, clenching her fists so hard that all feeling went numb. “It’s not going to be the same this time. Please, Luci. Lucien.”

  He stopped mid-step down the stairs.

  “That’s the first time you’ve said my full name.”

  “Please.”

  “The Earth Mother is a cruel and vengeful goddess, isn’t she?”

  And then he left.