“Your play is robotic. Talented, but formulaic,” Darth Hamster says from the seat next to me. “A useful metric for me, but perhaps imagine your frustration as the enemy mid-laner? I can use any data at this stage.”
When I got down to the synch lab to play live games against Earthers, DH was here and suggested we start our duo queue quest early. I thanked him for his consideration and the donation of his champion skin.
The next game, I die a lot, but I absolutely make the enemy mid-laner hate his life, leading their team to a permanent lane swap. DH preys upon him for the rest of the match and the result isn’t close. He asks me to play the same style, but as ADC with him as a bruiser support. He calls some very odd movements in the game, but the pair of us end up being a marauding nightmare with his map timing and my hair trigger engages.
“I like that one. Save that energy for a Gen-lock game.” I look over to him with a raised eyebrow. “My first championship came after she encouraged us to have . . . I believe she said a ‘clown fiesta’ game. After that morale boost, we came back and played a game like we just played. Important tool, but we must be more than just tricks, yes?”
“You’re pretty good at this management thing, D-H.”
He shrugs. “I just try to find where your best game and my best game intersect. I think ours may intersect in multiple places. We should continue looking for them.” And then the talking stops and he queues us back in.
After two more games, he stops chirping and we rapid queue. He must like where we’re at and its now time to get into a groove. Six hours of gaming comes to an end before I know it, and I can’t help but smile with how much better I feel after slinging some buttons with Hamster.
It also doesn’t feel bad that a generational talent wants to duo with me. Just saying.
“I will talk with coach Martyr, he will have some champion options for us to practice. I look forward to seeing more of this.” He gestures between us and looks at me for a brief moment, then starts another one of his games and gets lost in it.
He said he’ll talk about champions for me to play with the coach of the current championship team, Martyr of Orion Black. Holy shit. I message Ophelia right away.
/I just spent 6 hours gaming with Hamster. He brought up Martyr. Am I getting an offer?!/
\Good to put time in with D-H. I’ll get the team on that footage. There have been talks about a new mid-laner or a roamer for the Black or Star team. But there’s also been talk about canning the Star team and just having Black and the Valkyries.\
\Side note, Get an assistant, then have them contact mine for some items for tomorrow. Tah tah.\
Just, get one? Do I just log into My Orion account select Hire Assistant?
//Automated query functionality is restricted to Vice Presidents and above.
Alright, I’ll still log in and use the help function. Are Orion-provided assistants available to me?
Orion:\> Department Heads, Vice Presidents, and Officers are positions that are automatically staffed with assistants.
:\>Personalities and team members that contribute more that $1 million US in yearly revenue are also eligible.
Alright, Orion, what is my contribution?
Orion:\Selena_Campbell> A social media personality and professional gaming employee of moderate to high renown. Her ad and media revenue exceeds $5million US yearly while gaming revenue varies widely from year to year. For business queries, contact the Vice President of Public Relations and Branding.
Well shit, things I didn’t know I could just prompt the building about. I message HR to let them know I require an assistant, forward them my two queries, and that I will be visiting after lunch. It’s more of a boss bitch approach than I would normally take, but seeing my worth in Orion-linked publicity is making me feel confident and a teensy bit entitled.
Lunch was calm, but nice. I flirted with the hostess and the bartender and they were nice to me back. I got excellent service and a fun little side dish of seaweed greens and a sesame dressing to go along with my Shabu-Shabu.
I decide to head back to my condo and change into something less ‘gamer’ and more ‘influencer’ with a pink and lavender dress with some sandals with white and gold straps that tie up my calves. Add some bangles and a cute floppy hat and I’m all set to take a few selfies and maybe post later.
HR apparently has multiple floors, and the floor I’m due at apparently only handles ‘talent’. Great, they are totally prepared to handle the frilly bitches like me. I shrug and keep on walking to get me an assistant like I was told to.
“Welcome to Orion human resources. How may we direct your attention?” A pleasant looking man with a robotic demeanor looks up at me with a plastic smile.
“I messaged earlier about getting an assistant? My boss told me to get one, and so I’m here.”
“Excellent. You can either scan on the terminal if you are logged into the building, or we can use your Orion-issued temporary badge if you are talent visiting our offices.”
I shrug and waive my hand over the terminal, knowing I automatically authenticate every time I get into an elevator since I live here too.
“Selena Campbell, aka Zhantsa. It does say that you are eligible for an assistant . . . and that one has already been assigned to you. Odd. Let me make an inquiry.”
I hear the hurried heels thump down the hallway behind the door this man’s back right. A familiar face opens the door. “Selena, good to see you. Come with me please.” Lucy waives me on in as I walk behind the counter, much to the receptionist’s dismay.
When the door shuts behind us, Lucy speaks. “I’ve been wondering when you’d come to see us. You’ve been eligible for a while now.”
“It’s good to see you too Lucy, but I feel as though I’m missing something?”
She snorts, “Yeah, probably. I’ve been trying to get a date with you for months and you’ve been oblivious.”
“You busy tomorrow night?” I ask.
“But noo, some team-mate, wait, what?”
“Want to grab dinner tomorrow before my schedule is insane for a week?”
She stops to look at me for a minute, really look, and then grabs my shoulder. “If you’re not serious, this is mean. But, but!” She sees my mouth open to address her statement but refuses to let me comment, “You need to meet your potential assistants first.”
If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
“I’m not just assigned one?”
“Normally, yes, but you represent three different areas that we cover, so Ophelia insisted on options.”
“Goddess, she must be tired of my shit.”
That gets a laugh from the tall woman with a cute bob-cut. “She wants to free up some of her staff, because my boss won’t give her any more people on her current budget. You, though, well, we can talk about more after you choose an assistant.” She opens the door to a conference room and three women are seated at a long table.
Each of them are in a different version of a suit, two with skirts and one with pants and a vest. I recognize all of them, and have flirted with each at least once at parties over the last year. I look to Lucy and glare at her. Her smile is at least a thousand watts of ‘you brought this on yourself’.
“Afternoon ladies. If that screen is for presentations, I hope you had a backup plan.”
“But I spent all morning on those slides!” The curly-haired brunet in a pink blouse and gray jacket combo whines.
“Just talk to me, chica. If you’ve looked at my file, you know I’m not the type for a presentation. And if you had ideas about slideshows for my wardrobe, then perhaps we should nip that here and now.”
“You can’t use the paper-doll interface. Does a holo-overlay bother you too?” The pant-suit with a sharp jaw asks.
I nod, “It makes me a little sick, but it doesn’t hurt. I prefer to open a closet with matched options. Like a manicured wardrobe for a photo shoot.” They nod and tap notes into their interface.
“Alright, I’m going to keep going with this then. If you have an eight am show for a shoot, I’m going to want to be in your suite with coffee in hand at six thirty to finish the process of waking you up before makeup and hair. How likely are you to have showered by then?”
“Mmm, ten percent at best. I slow start, but run for a long time. If you need me ready in half an hour, you’ll probably need to push me into the shower yourself and let me shower with a cup of coffee.” Several of them snicker and Lucy swats my shoulder.
“It’s been a problem before. They should know.” I shrug.
“Have you ever been late for a show time?” Freckles in navy asks.
“For hair and makeup, yes. Gaming, never. It should be noted, however, that I test a separate time dilated realm, and contacting me for ‘emergencies’ will be difficult. Four to six hours of in-Alaris time will be needed. That transition cannot be rushed as far as I’m aware.”
More notes being taken, then pant suit looks up to consider me again. “How polite do I need to be if I feel like moving along or positioning you is necessary? Say a press conference, or some gaming glad shots?”
“Mm, good question. Until I trust you, I’ll need you to tell me you’re going to touch me. I have social anxiety issues and I tend to react poorly to unsolicited touching.”
“Can confirm, she brained Roger at a party, and punched Caprise in the boob for touching her neck from behind.” Two of the girls shifted uncomfortably, and pant suit just nods. Apparently those are ‘known’ incidents.
“Moving on. Tell me your specialties. Starting from my left.” I point at curls.
“Exposure and brand synergy. If you’re looking to couple your fashion ‘grams and your gamer ID, I’m your girl.”
“Fashion and Makeup. You have some undeveloped territory that I know we can grow to match your other successes.” Freckles is right, Ophelia’s been asking me to pay more attention to those things.
“Personality and Opportunity management. I’m excellent at matching opportunities to talent, and ensuring that everything that needs doing gets done on time and to the best of our ability.”
I check my HUD and find that pant suit’s name is Jessie Weiman and a quick background shows that she’s been persistently overbearing with her clients and her efforts to manage their schedules. Kinda seems like I need one of her.
“So, ladies, Ophelia’s team still wants to push me to their own agendas, they just don’t want to be the ones managing my socials and schedule. So, Jessie, I hope you’re good at the gram and the tock, and whatever else that needs snapping.”
She snorts. “I can coordinate the snaptock grambook.”
“Jessie. She really doesn’t know what’s involved with her own accounts.” Lucy says. Jessie’s eyes widen but says nothing. “Seems like Selena made her decision. Sorry Cam and Fi.”
“Damnit! I would have sworn I’d get you with the fashion and makeup. Your team-mate need an assistant?”
“I mean, probably. But she’s not on the level where it’d be paid for by Orion yet.”
Freckles looks over to Lucy for permission, who shrugs, and then starts tapping out a message with her interface.
“Jessie, you’re with me for the afternoon. Passes, preferences, etcetera. Then I want you to plan an opportunity for me tomorrow morning. Freckles was right that I need a fashion spot, but I’m thinking something business. Also think about athletics, I’m doing more testing and my fitness should improve in the next months.”
Jessie is staring at me while her fingers flash across the table. Phantom typing, keyboard anywhere is amazing. I turn to Lucy.
“Do I need to set up an expense account through you all? Or do I just set my own up and give her a card?”
“I fully recommend a personal account with transaction limits. Orion is here to fund a wardrobe change, not coffees and lunches.” She leans close. “Yes to dinner tomorrow. Can I pick the place?”
I smile while I nod in acceptance. Lucy maneuvers to talk to her two other helpers while I motion for Jessie to follow me out of the conference room. Once we get to the elevator banks, I stop and turn toward her.
“Alright planner. There are a bunch of things you know we need to do. Optimize while we head to my condo and get you front-door access.”
“I hope your whole life isn’t this ‘seat of the pants’.”
“Well, no. But much of this afternoon should have been predictable, so this is more up in the air than normal because why would you plan before you got the job?”
“I hear you’re the first resident. How is that?” Jessie asks.
“It just is. I’m more me here than I ever was in the real. I get bonuses for testing out Orion’s limit cases, but like with the paper doll and the holo-entertainment suites there are some drawbacks.”
“I mean, sure, but you’re treated like a noble around here.”
I snort, “I don’t notice really. I try to do my job and try not to get in the way of other people’s jobs. Sometimes those jobs are me also and we throw each other off. But that’s what I have you for now.”
We get out of the elevator and stop at the second door to the left. “Thirty seven ‘B’. Home suite home.” I pause for a few seconds, “That joke plays better in text.”
“Are you secretly an old woman?”
“Mmm, not sure I like that attitude missy. I’m as old as I look, thank you.”
I set up permissions for my front door between the hours of five am and eleven pm, and give her elevator access for the same. I tap a few more menus to put a few thousand in an ‘incidental’ account for her to use on us for work days, and then refer her to Ophelia’s team to transfer some of the social media assets to her.
“Aaand we’re already having dinner with a VP and her team. I’m meeting a top executive on my first day. Sure, why not.”
“Is this rolling with the punches or delaying emotion? ‘Cause it eventually needs to turn into the former or you will implode.”
“This pant-suit isn’t for show Miss Campbell. I said I managed personalities, and I’m good at it. The ramp up with you is just a little absurd.” She takes a deep breath and then turns to me, “Shall we go over your wardrobe for dinner? Or are we off to more adventure before that?”
“Adventure? What kind?” Kavita asks, walking into the room in less clothes than usual.
Jessie looks to me with a judgement brow and I shake my head to deter those thoughts.
“Miss Campbell has a work meeting in two hours, and I need to be brought up to speed before then. I think Fiona wanted to meet you, if you made your way down to sixth floor HR, I’m sure she’d love to meet you. Rising talent should be accommodated.”
Kavita beams at the ‘rising talent’ comment and darts back into her room.
“I’m keeping you. No takes backsies.” I say to Jessie.
“Are you seriously not involved? There is a vibe.”
“A coward vibe. She pushed me away, and now her time here is short. The timer for her permissions is ten days.”
“That’s soon, Miss Campbell.”
“Earth days. She’s got plenty of time. The last thing I want is to have my next bout in the ATC after my testing dive is to see her being pissy with me for another week.”
“Talk to me about this test dive.”
“I log over to Alaris Eternum, which has time dilation but it is a dramatic time thing. A DTC if you will, so time isn’t always linear. It’s usually double, but never for the whole period. Hence the need for you to give me a few hours ATC notice before I need to be at anything.”
Jessie nods and keeps on typing to her interface. As much as I want to be nice and help, I don’t know how? Anyway, flirting won’t fix it, and neither will duct tape . . . wait, would duct tape? No. Steady nerd, steady.
I show her around our normal photoshoot floor with the synch room setup for my gaming days. She seems unimpressed, but that’s kind of the point. I show her my testing department, and that it’s essentially an open room with a desk and an immersion couch.
“Can I take this desk and office? I know you don’t need the couch, so as far as office space goes, it’s already committed and you don’t use it.”
“Yeah, I’ll transfer it right away.” Somebody should use it at least.
