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This Is Not a Game

  Jeremy

  “I apologize for the kick,” said Captain Karn Veylan. “I follow orders, and I don’t tolerate disobedience.”

  “Apology accepted,” Jeremy lied, already deciding to stay wary around him. “You’re fast. How do you do that?”

  “Dash skill. You might learn it. What abilities do you have besides poisoning people?”

  Jeremy winced at the jab, but he answered, keeping some information a secret. “I have some magic. Not much. I guess I need an antidote for my venom. Any idea how I can get that?”

  “An alchemist can extract it and craft one. Pricey, though.”

  “All my gold’s gone… mysteriously.” Jeremy hoped Karn would comment. He didn’t.

  “We can still start the process. Got anything valuable?”

  “I lost everything when I got knocked out.”

  “You’ll find more on your quest,” Karn said, still dodging the subject.

  Maybe he really didn’t know. Jeremy gave him the benefit of the doubt.

  Karn took him to a sprawling alchemist shop, one far larger than Elaria’s. One wall brimmed with ingredients, the other lined with shelves stacked with potions.

  “How may I hel—Oh!” The shopkeeper blinked at Jeremy. “What are you?”

  “I get that a lot. I was human, but I got turned into a frog.”

  “Fascinating! I could study you for weeks.” She walked over to him and gazed at him. Jeremy had to dodge the pokes and prods from the old hag.

  “Thanks?” Jeremy said, eyeing her leprous stare. “Actually, I need help with something else. I have a venom attack, and I need an antidote.”

  “Really!? I’ll do the first few for free!” She leaned in, glimpsing Melorien. “Oh, holy Nivalár! A moonwake koi! I’ve dreamed of this moment. May I hold him?”

  “He’s got a mind of own,” Jeremy said as Mel vanished, teleporting to the door.

  “Guess that’s a no,” Jeremy shrugged. “What do you need for the antidote?”

  “I may’ve come on too strong,” she said, pouting. “Maybe next time he’ll give me a chance. Come. Come, I’ll extract the venom.”

  As she worked, she rambled. Her name was Ella Thorn. She’d lived in Serenviel all her life, adventuring in her youth.

  “That’s how I learned alchemy,” she said. “Apprentices travel with mentors and fighters to gather rare ingredients. It’s a delicate craft. Mix things wrong, and you get poison. It took me four years to brew my first minor potion.”

  There goes that dream, Jeremy thought. In games, you get ingredients, mix, and go.

  “Okay then. I’ve got enough venom,” Ella said. “Come back tomorrow morning. I’ll have a minor antidote ready. I’ll keep refining it. It might take me a few suns to make a ‘Superior’ potion.”

  “We’ll stay the night and come back tomorrow. Do you have mana and health potions I can buy or trade?”

  “If your friend lets me pet him, I’ll give you two of each.”

  “Deal,” Jeremy said. “I’ll try to convince him over dinner.”

  As they left, Karn smirked. “Smart move getting the hag to hand over potions.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Mayor Thalorin said we’re welcome to stay another night at his palace. I recommend it. His beds are far better than any inn’s.”

  Jeremy accepted the offer.

  “You decided to stay another night! Fantastic!” Thalorin greeted them warmly. “Come in. I’d love to hear more about Earth.”

  Jeremy shared stories, but the mayor sat stunned hearing about Earth’s tech: computers, TVs, games, phones. Thalorin’s eyes gleamed with entrepreneurial hunger. Elar wouldn’t see such tech for ages, but he already saw profit.

  “Is Serenviel religious?” Jeremy asked to change the subject. “Elaria was like a monastery. Thal’Seren felt totally opposite, almost like a physical evil. Who do people worship in this city?”

  “Most cities worship the Goddess. Some are more devout than others. Some worship no one. But I believe ascension requires divine help.”

  “Ascension?”

  “The final step to immortality,” Thalorin said, eyes gleaming. “You become more than flesh. I don’t fully understand it, but I intend to try.” He winked, chewing as he spoke. “Some switch gods to ascend faster. Lesser gods offer similar promises. I think the priest in Elaria is close… What’s his name?”

  “Velarion,” Eli said.

  “Yes! Velarion,” Thalorin said, spraying wet crumbs almost hitting Jeremy. “He’s probably near ascension.”

  “That’s why I asked,” Jeremy said. “Velarion preached peace, but I got robbed. And the creatures here… they’re all hostile.”

  “Evil exists because Vaerunel always finds those willing to trade morality for power.”

  That’s a grim thought.

  Thalorin tossed his meat aside, wiped his mouth, and stood. “I’m turning in. If you need anything, ask a servant.”

  What a way to end a conversation…

  [I don’t like him.] Mel said, hiding under the table on Jeremy’s lap.

  Sorry, buddy. We’re leaving tomorrow, so you won’t see him for a while.

  Jeremy lay in bed, pondering theology. Did each world have its own pantheon? Was his God the only one on Earth, or was He also here? Was Satan like Vaerunel, or were they one and the same? Were Odin, Zeus, and Jupiter just ascended mages? Was “god” just a word for someone with unfathomable power?

  He hadn’t expected another world to shake his beliefs.

  He snuggled into the soft comforter; the bed was as comfortable as Karn promised. His body ached despite full health points. In games, rest or stamina potions literally erased exhaustion. Here, Jeremy knew one night of rest wouldn’t be enough.

  He thought about RPGs as he drifted off to sleep.

  Losing stamina slowed movement.

  Potions restored everything instantly.

  Health dropped, healed, no pain.

  Tomorrow, he’d wish he were just a game character.

  ?

  “Fudge! Not on the knuckles again! Com’on!” Jeremy exclaimed, jumping around waving his hands in the air like he just didn’t care. He grew weary of the pain. Even a rap across the knuckles made him want to quit. He had suffered cuts, bruises, stabs, hits on the back of the head, kicks to the stomach, had mana pulled from his body, and now a Griefbinder hit him with a stick…repeatedly.

  [You should dodge the sticks, Jeremy,] Mel said.

  “I’m trying! Thanks!”

  Karn fought his own group of Griefbinders, creatures similar to the Shadewisp, only these floaters possessed weapons. Eight of these dementor-looking demons came out of nowhere and attacked the group only minutes after leaving the Serenveil city limits.

  Jeremy killed one of the eight right away using the divinity spell, but he couldn’t use the ability again for another hour.

  Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.

  Karn dashed from one wisp to the next, but even with his speed, he struggled to handle five at once.

  Eli could only duck and weave like a boxer, essentially causing a diversion.

  Mel bounced from one wisp to the next, shooting them with water.

  Jeremy got pummeled by a single wisp. Every time he would raise his hand to call lightning, the griefbinder would rap him on the knuckles like an old teacher from the ‘50s with a ruler.

  [You really need to learn how to defend yourself, Jeremy,] Mel said, while staring at the helpless frog on the ground trying to deflect attacks.

  “You think?! Can’t you help or do anything?”

  [I wish I could help, but my attacks are useless. Sorry.]

  “I know. But you could try to make me feel better.”

  [How?] Mel asked, turning his head inquisitively like a puppy hearing the word “treat”.

  “If this didn’t suck, that would’ve helped.”

  [I suggest you take one of their sticks when this fight is over.]

  “If I live!” Jeremy knew he’d survive, but complaining felt good.

  Karn killed two wisps while Eli’s circle of healing made sure no one died.

  Jeremy took a beating.

  The griefbinder attacking him moaned like a cat in heat. Apparently, that’s how it cast a spell. As the spell took effect, energy forcefully surged out of Jeremy’s pores, which felt like being waxed from the inside out.

  “I’m almost…done here,” Karn shouted. “Bear with…the beating for just…a…moment longer. It will only make you…stronger!”

  Thanks a lot, captain, Jeremy thought.

  [Your mana is high enough to use lightning,] Mel said. [Would you like me to shoot water at the jerk first?]

  Yeah! Hit him a few times! I wanna shock the crap outta him!

  Melorien unleashed a flurry of water pulses at the wisp, like pelting it with water balloons. Jeremy, meanwhile, could finally raise his hand to summon a lightning bolt, stunning the persistent Griefbinder that had been hitting him.

  Jeremy got to his feet, dusted himself, took the staff from one of the dead Griefbinders, and hit his wisp like a pi?ata.

  The wisp reached out to Mel, desperate to use its soul anchor ability. Mel stuck his tongue out at it and shot it with water, resisting the spell.

  Was that spit?

  Jeremy hit the distracted wisp squarely with a wind gust, knocking it into the one attacking Eli, giving Eli a moment’s reprieve.

  Jeremy ignored the kill notification and went to help Eli.

  “Can I take a stamina and mana potion at the same time?” Jeremy asked.

  “The taste may not be to your liking, but it will not have negative side effects.”

  Jeremy drank the green one first. It tasted a little like pistachio ice cream; not his favorite, but tolerable. Jeremy’s stamina shot up, and he felt like he had just drunk a 5-Hour Energy shot.

  He drank the mana, and as Eli said, the flavors did not mix well. It tasted a lot like drinking orange juice just after brushing your teeth.

  With Jeremy’s mana bar full, he hit a griefbinder with a wind gust.

  “Mel! Hawk tuah on this one!” Jeremy cried.

  [Well, now you’re making it sound all yucky.] Mel said, but he shot the water, anyway.

  The combo spell of water and electricity did the trick again, knocking the wisp out for good.

  “We should name this combo…it’s effective.”

  [You just called it Hawk Tuah. I guess that will work.]

  Karn had killed all but two. Tempted to let him fight on his own, Jeremy watched Karn fight. He had hoped for a little repayment for the treatment in the cell the day prior, but instead he watched a seasoned warrior fighting like a true champion.

  Jeremy heard his mom nagging in the back of his mind, “Baby, I know it hurts, but you don’t gotta chase justice wit a clenched fist. Dat’s da business of da Good Lord. Vengeance might feel right, but it don’t heal; it just keeps da wound open, and it festers. You let God handle it, and you keep you heart soft. Dat’s how we stay whole.”

  Jeremy reluctantly heeded his mom’s internal advice and called divinity striking both wisps at the same time.

  I didn’t know it could do that, he thought.

  Jeremy thought for a second. “I’ll wait on the level up.”

  “Yes,” Jeremy said, a bit surprised he could magically loot all the bodies at the same time.

  Eyeing the haul, Jeremy asked Eli, “Should I absorb a core?”

  “I believe,” Eli answered, “the wisp core should provide you with another magical ability or maybe enhance one you already possess. I don’t see the harm in absorbing one. They are valuable, but at your experience level, it would be more useful to absorb one.”

  “I agree,” Karn said. “Absorb the first, see what it does for you. If it’s something you can use, absorb the other two. That should enhance the ability. Since Eli does not need gold, I’ll take the rings.”

  Grief would come in handy, especially if I could refill my stamina from drained stamina.

  Jeremy looked at the transparent globe of magic, admiring the swirl of darkness swimming beneath the surface. It called to him, wanting to be absorbed.

  I hope this is a good idea.

  “Absorb core.”

  The core floated from his hand and then slowly injected itself into his chest. The surreal feeling jolted Jeremy as energy pulsed through him. Knowledge filled his brain. He immediately knew how to use the grief ability.

  Without a second thought, he absorbed the other two cores, sending grief to level three.

  Jeremy then told the system to level him up.

  Jeremy added two points to Wisdom since he was a mage. He sank two into Endurance because fatigue sucked. He dropped the last point into Strength. That single point made him feel less like a weakling.

  After adding just one point, he felt like he could knock out a hundred push-ups without breaking a sweat.

  How strong is Bart? Bart claimed to have 20 points in Strength, which was almost twice the strength I have now…if points distributed exponentially Bart could be as strong as Captain America.

  “When you’re done playing with yourself, come look over here,” Karn said. “I think this statue moves.”

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