The first time I tried to loot a body; "I DiDn'T hAve ThE nEcEsSaRy ToOls".

  Well, now I have a knife. I remembered something in my lineage description saying I had a 10% chance to acquire useful items from “a fresh kill”. It was a small chance, but… “You’re saying there’s a chance!” I said in my best Jim Carrey voice.

  I really should stop with the impressions. Therapy through ill placed humor.

  I walked over to the second rat I had killed. A banner floated near the body.

  “Yes.”

  Well, that was better than “DENIED”.

  The hideous orangish teeth were still in the rat’s mouth. Reluctant to touch them, I gave them a wiggle, and they both sort of popped out. If only my wisdom tooth would have done that in Afghanistan instead of the dentist hammering it out with a ball peen and chisel.

  My jaw throbbed with a phantom pain as if the dentist was back at it again.

  The buck teeth didn't look like much, but as I examined the ugly things a banner popped up giving me some information.

  I knelt down and took out the kitchen knife. Normally, I would use a proper skinning knife made by Buck or Case, but the only knife in my possession would have to work. I had never field-dressed a nutria rat before, but I figured the process should be similar to cleaning a rabbit. Making a small slit between its shoulder blades, I worked my fingers into the slit and pulled my hands apart. I don’t know if it was my strength or if I was just doing it right, but the skin tore perfectly in half and peeled easily off the meat. The hide easily came off the rear legs without even using the knife, only leaving a small amount of fur on the paws. I sawed through the neck bone removing the head completely. Carefully cutting the belly open all the way to the rib cage, I got the knife in under the ribs and separated the membrane that basically held all the innards into the chest cavity. When I was finished, I held what looked like an odd-shaped chicken ready to go into the oven.

  I really didn’t believe this process was going to be worth the effort unless I was going to eat everything I killed. Fur couldn’t be worth that much money.

  Another message popped into view.

  Cool! I mean, I already knew how to do it, but this meant I could learn how to do it better.

  I didn’t want to take the meat, but I didn’t want to leave it either because I was raised to never waste and to always eat what you killed. I already had broken that rule three times, and I didn’t want to break it again. I weaved the body through the extension cord and took it with me. Temporary problems require temporary solutions. Thank God and Mary it didn’t stink…too badly.

  I went over to my kickball-homerun kill and repeated the process of skinnin’ and guttin’ the thing. While obtaining more teeth and another pet, I was beginning to think this process may not be worth it until the craziest thing happened when I gutted the rat. I found a water bottle. Full. A little bloody, but what the hell was a water bottle doing inside a carcass.

  Water’s called “Life’s Blessing”?

  Whatever. I was really thirsty, so I removed the bloody cap and drank without letting the bottle touch my lips.

  I saved the last quarter, bent down, and poured some into my cupped hand. Starla drank greedily as I poured more until it was gone. “Sorry, sweetie. All gone.”

  I weaved the second rat body through the cord and started walking back to the south again with Starla close behind.

  Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.

  Along my path, I killed two snakes, another rat, and evaded another gator turtle. I weaved the snakes and rats into my cord, but I didn’t try to harvest them.

  After an hour of trekking through the muck, I came to a peninsula. Apparently, I had been following one channel until it flowed into a much larger one. I could either swim or go back and find a better way to cross.

  “Let’s go for a swim, Starla. You okay with that?”

  She stared at me suspiciously. I was going for it, and hopefully, she would follow.

  Swimming 300 feet without current wouldn’t be difficult, but I could actually see the current, and with the water so dingy, I couldn't see anything under the surface. As I waded out, I scanned for any swirls or splashes. My body started to tremble despite the water being lukewarm, and when the water reached my waist, I pushed off reaching out with breaststrokes. The water felt good actually, and by the time I reached the middle, I felt slightly refreshed. Thankfully, nothing attacked me, yet.

  I turned to check on my little buddy, but Starla hadn’t moved from the shore.

  “Come on, girl! Come on!” I said in a high pitched girly voice trying to sound encouraging.

  With hesitation, she felt at the water with her tiny little paws testing the temperature. She paced from one place to another in a dance of indecision.

  “Come onnn. The water feels good!” If she didn’t come, I would have to swim back and have her ride on my head like the gingerbread man on the fox.

  She finally built up enough nerve to come out to me. She was a good swimmer and reached the middle rather quickly.

  I heard the dreaded sound of something getting into the water. Then something else followed by another splash.

  Crap!

  “Hurry up, girl! We gotta go!”

  I turned and started swimming with all my might. In about 10 seconds, I was at a point where I could touch the bottom, and Starla wasn’t too far behind me paddling away furiously. I kept moving toward shore until I was only about knee deep. Out of nowhere, I saw a banner floating about 2 feet from her just in view over the water. I focused on the words.

  “Dear Baby Jesus wrapped in swaddling clothes lying in a manger! Please help Starla! Move it, girl!” I shouted in desperation.

  As if He heard me, I got a sudden idea. I fumbled with the extension cord and pulled one of the rat carcasses free. I carefully aimed and threw it as close to the banner as I could. The banner floated in the air only a few inches from my new best friend, and the gator would be within eating distance any minute. As the rat flew, I prayed, “Please work, please work, pleeeeaaasssseeeee….”

  Like a professional cornhole player making it in the hole…Perfect shot! It landed right behind Starla and right where the gator was coming up. It bit down hard on the rat with an audible snap. I could see the banner move the other way as the gator took its fresh meat off to devour it.

  To my right, another banner surged toward Starla. I hurled the second rat across, and it skipped across the water providing adequate bait for the beast. The gator sprang out of the water several feet snapping the rat’s body from the surface, then swam off in the opposite direction.

  Two down.

  My heart thumped to the rhythm of We Will Rock You. Boom, boom, tss, boom, boom, tss. I untangled the third rat from the cord and scanned the shore, eyes straining. A third ‘something’ had entered the water...Boom, boom, tss, boom, boom, tss. I could feel it. But I couldn’t see a banner. No swirls. No wake in the water. Just silence.

  Starla was only a few feet away. Boom, boom, tss, boom, boom, tss.

  “HURRY! You’re almost here, girl! You can do—"

  SPLASH!

  Out of nowhere, a banner erupted inches behind Starla along with a massive mouth, its jaw wide and teeth gleaming. One second there was absolutely nothing, then boom, gator.

  Starla scrambled up the shore, dirt and mud flying.

  Instinct took over. I swung the rat by the tail like a club, slamming it into the gator’s snout with a sickening thump. It staggered, veering off just enough to miss us both. But it didn’t back down.

  It twisted; 80 sharp teeth aimed at my leg. I leapt; barely escaping and rolled. Its momentum carried it spiraling past me, exposing something vile.

  Its tail wasn’t the tail of an alligator at all. It had somehow fused with the head and body of a seven-foot snake. Mouth agape, ivory needle fangs on full display, it struck at me.

  My heart punched my ribs. I still gripped the rat, so I used it as a club. My swing connected with the head of the snake and it bit down hard, skewering the rat. Thanks to a little luck, its teeth got stuck.

  The gator half came whipping around for another attack.

  The jaws struck at me sideways knocking me backward into the muck, and I dropped my metal rod. The glancing blow only did minimal damage. I was able to practice my new agility as I twisted midair and landed hard on my knees. I lost my grip on the rat, but it was still caught in the snake's mouth rendering that half of the beast useless.

  The gator half lunged toward my face.

  With my bare hands, I caught it mid-snap. With every ounce of strength I had, I pushed my palms against its snout. The thing was fifteen feet long, maybe more. Its jaw was the size of a dinner table. Somehow, I held it back. A gator meets human stalemate. Just for a second.

  It shook its massive head and flung me like a ragdoll three feet away. I landed clumsily, pain bursting across my shoulder as it slipped out of socket with a sickening crunch. I pushed up ignoring the discomfort, crouched low, arms wide like a Greco-Roman wrestler squaring off against the monster.

  I lowered my head, absurdly picturing Happy Gilmore head butting that gator in the movie and chuckled to myself. “I know there’s no way I can beat you…you overgrown lizard, but I’m not going down without a fight.”

  The gator-snake beast sprang at me with perfect aim. It wouldn’t miss this time.

  Right before it connected with me, a boat broadsided the gladi-gator at full speed. With a tremendous impact, the boat jolted to the side, almost knocking the driver out of the boat. The impact sent the gator at least ten feet away, knocking it unconscious. I guess the adrenaline and the fight had encompassed me entirely because I completely missed the boat’s approach.

  “Whatcha waitin’ fo’?” Tony yelled at me. “An invite or somtin’? Get ya tail on da damn boat, Ami!”

  My dad’s best friend, Tony Fontenot, reached out a weathered hand. I stared at the pockmarked, misshapen face and thought he was the most frikin’ bee-ay-you-tiful thing I'd ever seen.