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Chapter 27A

  Ivaenzikal sat in meditation within his Mindscape, reaching out along the paths of his Nexus to the most troubled of his companions. It was always sad to lose someone he’d spent most of his life with. There had been fifteen in his team originally. Only twelve survived after the MCF disbanded. Those twelve had gone through hell together, even as the world around them grew more advanced.

  Galileo had attempted to erase himself, but his soul had been imprisoned.

  Ivan reached towards the older connection he maintained with Medjay. His friend. He felt the impenetrable force that kept him from reaching her and gave up once again. If the new Marielle truly chose to take on the task of recovering her immortal soul, then someday, he knew he’d have to reveal the secret he’d kept for so long.

  It was the only way she could prepare herself to one day challenge the world that had driven Galileo to suicide.

  Kris:

  Dawn was about an hour away, but she was already awake. Her fingers gently stroked through Mari’s hair beside her, looking down at the taut expression on her lover’s face.

  Another nightmare. Kris sighed internally, wishing there was more she could do.

  On her left wrist, her bracelet blinked twice, then stopped for ten seconds, then blinked again. A repeating cadence that reminded her of the message she had received as a reply.

  With a feeling of regret still swirling in her heart, Kris slid out of bed and dressed herself. As she did, she tried to find the right words for what came next. Mari hadn’t been sleeping well since the procedure, but seeing it right beside her had made her feel an immediate need to find a solution sooner rather than later.

  She put on an ankle-length green gown that was more for lounging than anything she’d wear into public, and had slipped on some thigh-length stockings to keep her legs warm. That was when her bracelet chirped quietly, and Kris descended to their front door in silent strides.

  “Thank you for coming early.” She greeted as she opened the door.

  The tall woman on the other side had subtly reddened dark hair pulled into a bun and slit pupils like a snake. Her skin was faintly lined with the patterns of scales, and she wore a suit in purple and lined with neon green trim.

  “It sounded important, and I know you’ve been through a lot. We have about an hour to talk before Relkur arrives to prepare the loading access. I’m sorry if it ends up being too short.” Alynne offered a wan smile as Kris gestured her inside, and they both headed towards the counter that adjoined the kitchen to the sitting room.

  Alynne sat down while Kris set to preparing some tea.

  “So, what did you need to talk about? Though I think I could guess, I won’t bother to.” Her guest’s tone remained low, clearly aware of how early the hour was for others sleeping in the house.

  Kris took a deep breath, let it out, and then leaned back into the far counter. A full minute passed as she collected her thoughts. Alynne only waited, silent and patient, understanding writ across her features.

  “At first, I wanted to find a way to help Mari get over the things weighing on her mind. Whatever horrors she’s seen in two lives are clearly not helping her handle her struggles.” Kris hopped up to sit on the counter.

  “But?” Alynne prompted.

  Kris tipped her head back until it hit the cabinet behind her with a thunk. “But, I think I should figure myself out before I try to help her. I can’t decide how I’ll talk to her when I have no clue how I feel for myself.”

  “Admirable as that is, you’re starting off in the wrong direction. How about you first actually say what it is that is bothering you? Don’t dance around it.” Alynne’s gaze sharpened, and Kris flinched.

  She shivered as she caved to the request. “I’ve read stories about people dying. Heard people describe awful things. Nothing prepared me for seeing lifeless eyes staring at me.” Her voice shook, and Kris hugged herself, trying to preserve the warmth rapidly leaving her. “Nothing prepared me for being injured and feeling so damn helpless. To know Mari was out there, fighting those things without me, being strong, when I couldn’t stand with her.”

  A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

  Alynne stood, rounded the counter into the kitchen, and then stopped in front of her. Then she flicked Kris in the forehead.

  Kris looked down at her, confused.

  “We live in a world that is unfair. Things happen beyond anyone’s control, and not everyone can make a difference. For all my skills and all my efforts, your mother still outshines me in nearly every field. The same way you outshine your classmates. Perhaps that perspective is what makes this so much harder on you both. You’ve always been the most capable, so it’s hard to not try to make a difference?

  “But you’re both wrong. The first right thing you’ve done is try to sort out your feelings before trying to sort out anyone else’s issues. Your mother still has nightmares about the things she’s done. She’s never witnessed herself taking a life. Her hearing allows her to locate and handle threats without looking. Because she can’t stand to see it. I’m sure she hears the deaths of hundreds every night.

  “That’s the sad truth, Kris. You won’t ever get over it. Should never get over it. That’s how you preserve who you are. Think about what you fight for, and if that cause remains enough to keep fighting, then you keep fighting. You’ll always have to balance that in your mind. What you’ve done against why you did it. When that balance shifts, it could break you. My advice is to stick to your convictions.”

  Alynne worked her jaw, having spoken her mind, then turned around and poured the hot tea for the both of them.

  Kris just sat there, stewing in her own mind for a bit as the words hit her. When the warm glass was pressed into her hands, she mindlessly held it and stared into the ripples created by her own shaking hands.

  “How do I help Mari?” Kris finally asked, barely audible.

  “Be present.” Alynne said, not elaborating.

  She tried to think about that. Convictions? Why did I put myself in the position of fighting? Because I care about my home, my family, and Mari. She wanted to fight, so I made the choice that gave her no reason not to. Is she really my sole reason for doing anything now?

  It was a scary line of questioning. What had she lived for before bonding to Mari? Her goal had always been to find an end to the cycle of violence. And yet, history and the events she had lived through kept reinforcing the futility of that goal.

  She recalled something Anise had told her.

  “There’s a whole lot of tales back on Earth. Stories about how every community needs to have a target. A villain to direct their anger against. Someone to vent their frustrations at. That society doesn’t work without the black sheep. It’ll just find the next one to target.”

  The history of two worlds both told the same story. There was always a need to target someone. In Earth’s case, they’d sent a craft into space for a long journey just to chase down Marielle’s ship and destroy the ones they considered their enemies. So many years had passed, and the hatred never went away.

  “I know you always strove for some lofty goals.” Alynne spoke into the growing silence. “Start smaller. Give yourself a short term goal that’s attainable.”

  Kris paused, shaking her head and finally taking a sip of her tea. “You’re right, sorry.”

  “Brace yourself, if you decide to keep fighting. You’re this shaken, and you still haven’t killed any people. Monsters are a very different matter. You need to really think about whether your goals are firm enough in your mind before you can take that step.”

  “Thank you for the advice. I’ll give it some thought.” And she did.

  Her cultivation affirmed who she already was as a person. It was one of the things Anise had been teaching them about how progress worked. Airborne mana bent to the willpower of the person using it, and it would be more refined the clearer her will was. The firmer her beliefs.

  So who was she?

  Kris felt she was a student of history. For all her talents, she most often looked back on events and lamented the tragedies. After that, she was a guide. Someone who wanted to urge people along the path towards a better future.

  Her motivations to keep fighting—if she ignored how much of her emotions were tied to Mari—were tied to understanding what led to conflicts in history, and then forging a better path. Her twin halves resonated with her understanding, and she could feel it. She could sense the energy around her bending to that understanding of herself and reinforcing those concepts within her.

  It felt almost euphoric as the ‘qi’ in the air condensed towards her in a subtle stream and permeated her body. Just like that, she’d gained another tier on her path.

  “What was that?” Alynne asked, clearly confused by something, but unsure what it was.

  Kris considered for a moment before deciding to follow Mari’s example, hiding the truth of what they’d learned. “What was what?”

  Alynne raised her hand, as if trying to feel where a draft had come from. “I’m not sure. I just thought I felt something.”

  Kris pursed her lips and shrugged. “No clue. I might’ve felt a little bit of a breeze maybe, but that could’ve been Anise, upstairs.”

  Then, both of their bracelets chirped and flashed a subtle light twice. Kris scooted off the counter and set down her tea, going to the door to greet their other early guest.

  “Hello, Relkur. Thanks for coming.”

  “Morning, Krissanine.” He entered when she waved him in, and took in the layout. “So this is the strange den I heard about.”

  “Strange… what?” Kris asked, confused.

  Alynne set her own tea down and smiled mirthfully as she shook Relkur’s hand. “Appreciate you coming, despite all the mess you just went through with us. As to your question, Kris… perhaps I should simply show you.”

  With that, she headed towards the laundry room, where the hatch into the basement was.

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