“Jirmy,” Lard Lump said from the entrance of the safe room. “Why did you not use your sword?”

  “I get more experience when I kill weak monsters with my bare hands,” Jeremy said, trying to sound casual. The truth was this rat was bigger than usual, and he'd have had trouble killing it that way if the kobolds weren't there.

  She looked between him and where the rat had been. “Take healing potion.”

  “That's okay, I'm fine,” Jeremy said. He was slightly banged up, but that was it. The five kobolds were in worse shape than he was. “Your people need it more.”

  “Jirmy, come here,” she said, reentering the safe room.

  Not sure what to expect, he followed her.

  “You are stronger than a human rogue of your level should be,” she said, moving around her kitchen.

  “You think so?”

  “Yes,” she said. “Have some tea, good human tea, make you feel better.”

  “I don't think so,” Jeremy said, remembering when they first met and she tried to drug him. He knew what she wanted, but he wasn't sure if he should tell her. If Mezirma or the orcs found out, they might find a way to use it against him.

  “It's okay, this is good human tea, no tricks.”

  “Sorry,” Jeremy said. “I'm not sure I should tell you.”

  “You are different from other humans. Tell me truth and I will keep secret.” She got out a pot and put it on her stove.

  Jeremy noticed the other kobolds remained outside and the two of them had the place to themselves. What could the orcs or Mezirma do about his passive skills? From what he'd learned, passive skills couldn't be interfered with. “Fine. Throw in some of those cake things with the tea and don't charge me for it, and I'll tell you.”

  The teapot and food were soon in front of him, and of course, tasted great.

  Jeremy told her everything, starting from when he was pushed into the dungeon, to his friend being killed in front of him, convincing Clown Lord not to kill him, and what Clown Lord had told him about getting strong. “I've been training hard and am up to Enhanced Physical 3,” he told her. “My passive skills make me over three times stronger than I'd be without them.”

  “Impressive,” she said, studying him. “I've met old people with strong passive skills, but I have never heard of anyone so young getting so many passive skills in so short a time.”

  Jeremy drank the last of his tea. “Clown Lord said that's how I get strong and that's what I'm going to do.”

  “What you are attempting is dangerous, but I hope you succeed,” she responded. “More important, I hope you don't die.”

  ***

  That evening, like any other, he went back to his classroom, struggling to cast his crude light spell while maintaining Sneak and Trap Sense. Whenever he cast his light spell, his mana would drop to zero, and he'd have to reactivate his active skills when his mana recovered.

  After a bit of cajoling, Book had given him a pamphlet on puzzle solving. And though he hadn't made any progress with the smithy, he did find a creative use for the smithy furnace. Whenever a puzzle he was working on beeped, he'd toss it into the smithy furnace to contain the explosion.

  He'd tried to use the exploding puzzles to kill rats, but found that if a rat was nearby, instead of exploding, the puzzle would shoot out razors. After using a healing potion to reattach two fingers lost that way, he decided not to try that again, ever.

  “I think I've almost solved this puzzle!” Jeremy said, practically bouncing up and down from excitement. “If I move these two squares, all the lines and colors should match, and I'll be done. Finally!”

  “Move the squares then,” Flint said, looking bored.

  Jeremy did so and then tossed the puzzle away, not sure what to expect. There was a loud cracking noise, and the outermost layer of the puzzle dissolved, revealing a more difficult looking puzzle underneath. “How many layers do you suppose this puzzle has?” he asked, discouraged.

  “Many layers,” Flint said.

  Jeremy groaned.

  “We're almost out of rats,” Flint said. “It's time you made a plan for killing the rat king.”

  “Oh mighty, all knowing Book,” Jeremy said. “Tell us about the second floor of the dungeon's boss monster, the rat king.”

  The book vibrated with excitement.

  The fierce, mighty rat king Kritchek will be the most difficult monster you have ever faced. You must bring all of your friends and craft a careful plan before you attack.

  The rat king is much larger than the other rats you've faced. He is stronger and faster, his thick fur will be harder to penetrate with your weapons, and he can climb the walls of the labyrinth, so running from him is not an option. Once you open the door to mighty Kritchek's lair, you face a fight to the death.

  You must be very brave, young adventurer, and bring your many friends, for you face the greatest challenge of your short existence.

  Jeremy closed Book. “I'd be more worried if Book said the rat king was small and harmless. Kritchek doesn't sound that scary.”

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  “Perhaps,” Flint responded, pacing the classroom and tapping the floor with his sword cane. “The rat king is, without a doubt, the weakest boss monster in this dungeon, but do not underestimate him. Expect the unexpected.”

  “Or I could beat him to death with my bare hands. I think I'll do that.”

  Jeremy grinned as Flint produced his whiteboard and started a long, angry lecture. Annoying Flint was becoming one of his favorite dungeon pastimes.

  ***

  The next morning, Jeremy ran through the dungeon maze. The giant rat king's claws clicked on the dungeon floor as he followed close behind.

  Jeremy's plan was simple. Release the rat king, run like hell, get to the dungeon toy store, and go from there. The rat king was about the size of a bus and fast, but not insanely so. Jeremy was having no problem keeping ahead of him.

  Jeremy had leveled up and put his spare points into endurance. This helped him run faster, longer.

  Near the toy store, Jeremy saw bats circling something. He'd told the kobolds what he was up to and knew they should be on the other side of the dungeon, as the low level kobolds had no desire to tangle with a dungeon boss.

  If it wasn't the kobolds, who were they? Another group of adventurers? Was it possible they were friendly?

  “Die, human dog pig!” someone shouted in the distance.

  Or not.

  They looked down at him over the walls of the labyrinth. These adventures were shorter than he was, with greenish skin and large ears. Not human, definitely not friendly. He used Identify.

  Pitas Sndu

  Race: Goblin

  Sex: Male

  Child-Fighter: Level 6

  Drog Pdas

  Race: Goblin

  Sex: Male

  Child-Fighter: Level 6

  Cim Pdas

  Race: Goblin

  Sex: Male

  Child-Fighter: Level 6

  Terod Sktin, Goblin, Male, Level 7 Child-Spellcaster

  Gom Sog, Goblin, Male, Level 6 Child-Rogue

  Gorp Tiktin, Goblin, Male, Level 6 Child-Rogue.

  Gorm Tar, Goblin, Male, Level 6 Child-Fighter

  Gop Nakta, Goblin, Male, Level 6 Child-Rogue

  There were eight. Five were armed with crossbows, two with longbows, and one had a spell-casting staff.

  A larger crossbow wielding goblin also held Jeremy's fifteen-foot-long, charmed spear.

  Great.

  Flint appeared next to Jeremy with an “I told you so” glare on his face. He tapped his whiteboard, with “Don't Be An Idiot,” and vanished.

  This was a bad situation for several reasons.

  His pack held his most valuable possessions and pretty much everything he owned that he wasn't carrying on his person, and he'd left it near the toy store. He'd packed all his possessions that morning as he'd planned to leave this floor once he killed the rat boss, since that was the last thing left to kill—aside from the unending supply of bats, which didn't count.

  To make matters worse, he wasn't wearing any armor. He was running through the labyrinth in his clown suit, since that was what he could move the fastest in. As his objective was to get the rat to follow him, stealth was pointless. He had the spider-silk cloak in his storage ring; the cloak folded into an impressively small space. But getting the cloak out and putting it on while sprinting through the labyrinth was a difficult proposition. He was armed with a sword and knife, with plans to use his bow and arrows (he'd thoughtfully left with his pack), should an emergency arise.

  He activated Sneak and slowed down, letting the rat king catch up, thinking furiously. His original plan to deal with the monster rat was dead. Behind him was the bus-sized giant rat king. In front of him were at least eight goblin adventurers who wanted to kill him.

  He had no good options.

  When the rat king was a few feet behind him, he could feel and smell the rat king's hot breath and hear clicking footsteps as long claws touched the stone floor of the dungeon. A sound that was near deafening in this confined space.

  “Fire!” someone shouted, and the air filled with arrows.

  Time slowed for Jeremy. Arrows suspended in the air as he watched, able to do little but think about how much they were going to hurt if they hit him. He couldn't avoid them all, but if he changed direction, just a little, he could avoid the worst of them.

  Time sped up again as Jeremy sprinted forward, grabbing the charmed rope he'd wrapped around himself like a belt, and throwing it at the top of the labyrinth wall. A crossbow bolt went into his left thigh. A second crossbow bolt hit his left hip. A third went through his stomach. The pain made him want to scream, but he forced himself to ignore it and keep moving.

  He received a You have been poisoned! Notification. He ignored it, too. Poison was the least of his problems. They were trying to slow him down so the monster rat could kill him.

  The rat king squealed with rage as arrows hit him, too. Some kind of webbing spell missed Jeremy by inches, hitting the monster rat. Jeremy's charmed spear flew through the air, glancing off the rat king's shoulder.

  The end of his charmed rope hit the top of the wall and stuck to it. He flew up the rope with all the speed a 22 Agility could give him. Arrows flew past him. A fourth arrow hit his side, but he didn't feel anything... at least not at first. He jumped over the wall with a groan, bringing his charmed rope with him and landing on the roof of the clothing store that carried no usable clothes.

  He pulled out his spider silk cloak and put it on. He jumped to the ground, putting the store between him and the other adventurers. His legs collapsed.

  He had no time for this! In addition to his cloak, he'd stashed two healing potions for emergencies. He grabbed the first healing potion, drank it, and, reaching underneath his cloak, yanked the crossbow bolts from his legs and side, suppressing a scream from the pain. He then drank the second healing potion.

  He had a poison antidote potion with him, too, but the poison they used on their crossbow bolts was so weak that its effects were already fading.

  “Die human!” The short, green creature looked down at him from the top of the wall with a loaded crossbow. “Aaah!”

  The last was because the rat king jumped onto the wall and slashed the adventurer with his foot-long claws, sending the goblin flying.

  Good riddance, Jeremy thought. As he suspected, the boss monster rat was far more concerned with the adventurers shooting at him and throwing spells in his direction than he was with Jeremy.

  Jeremy stood on his still-healing legs, forcing himself to his feet.

  He heard music in the distance. Jack-in-the-bomb music.

  da dat da dat-dat-dat-dat-dat, dat dat, dadada.

  Uh oh.

  Whether by accident or deliberately, the goblins had set off the jack-in-the-bombs.

  He ran, getting as much distance between himself and the toy store as he could.

  Dat dadat dadadadadadat dat dadat dadada.

  He put his hands over his ears.