Lance began to use his Appraise skill. Checking the weapons and jerkins.

  " Goblin longsword"

  Shame+ tier

  +2 Damage

  +2 Agility

  Description: Made of crude scavenged ores, the goblin's craft these after their Guard Ceremony. Highly susceptible to breaking under stressed conditions they are mainly used to chop.

  Value: One Dull Exp Gem.

  “Goblin shortbow”

  Shame tier

  +2 Damage

  +2 Agility

  Description: Standard issue Goblin guard Trainee gear. Safer to keep the recruits in the back line, however this method has led to quick promotions due to misfire.

  Value: One Dull Exp Gem

  “Goblin dagger”

  Shame tier

  +3 Damage

  Description: Stone handled, with a crude ore mix hammered blade. Usually sharpened by Goblin Sharpening Stones, these are common amongst cave and forest dwelling goblins.

  Value: One Dull Exp Gem

  “Goblin Jerkin”

  Shame tier

  +2 Defense

  Description: A leather vest commonly threaded with hair or plant fibers. Can be found in a variety of leathers, ranging from bat, wolf, and hog. Goblin craft and usually too small to most.

  Value: One Dull Experience Gem.

  Lance sat back. He was excited about the idea of a few extra gems. He shared the specs of the items they had. All together if they didn't keep anything, totaling 8 gems from gear. Lance decided he wanted to keep the dagger for his boot, and the longsword which for him was certainly a short sword. They both accessed the Barter hub via their menus and immediately noticed an issue. Many of these items had been posted and their values had been undercut to the point that these items were not going to sell for anything, if they did. Wellyn stepped forward to the table and placed three mugs of slime soda down.

  “Suppose you lads are seeing yer holding mere trash. Best use these have is trade amongst the goblin-folk. Or expendable gear. Wouldn't catch most using them outright but you could always hold on to them until the market comes back.” He then took a large slurp of his soda leaving a frothy blue to his upper lip.

  “ Darn. But I suppose it makes sense. These are pretty crude. What about the leather then should we try to make something out of it?” King said, looking to Lance.

  “ I think he makes sense. These have value, just not to people like us. Maybe we do try and trade with the goblins. Wellyn is there a goblin city?” Lance asked.

  “Hmmm by name, not that I know of. But it's likely. Most kindred have a place to call home. Doesn't mean you won't find a band or two of goblins. Be aware most folk trade in goods not gems. Those are wish tender.” Wellyn finished by downing the rest of his slime soda.

  Lance and King gave each other a quick side eye glance.

  “ Okay well King help me with something yeah?” Lance said, standing up.

  “Sure what is it?” King said following Lance to a room in the back of the bar. It was dark but luckily for them they still had a buff active. Both of them noticed that even here buffs persist simultaneously. They walked over to a large wok on the floor before a stove. Lance bent down to grab under one side. “ Ah this is it huh, no problem I'll get it.” King said, standing Lance up.

  “Chiten - Arms”

  He quickly picked up the wok and placed it on the stove turning the handle in. Lance smiled brightly and he turned around to find if Wellyn was watching. Only to see him still at the table in the seating area.

  King dismissed his Chiten and they crawled amongst themselves into his clothing. Lance turned back and looked at the stove top wondering.

  “King, how old are you? Are you good at cooking?”

  “ I'm forty two. And cooking sure but it's easy to follow a recipe on a box or online with the proper tools. I'm guessing you want cooking advice?”

  “Well yeah. I'm 19. I've made a handful of sandwiches, instant ramen, some eggs and stuff. But like you said the recipe or instructions are there and the tools to do them are present in a modern kitchen… but” He trailed off looking around the room. There was a large table in the middle of the room. Two large three shelve racks along both side walls and a wood stove here against the back wall. Plenty of space between all of the furniture and open space on every wall. He had nothing. Not even a single spice, he pulled up the goblin daggers. Holding them he thought that they seemed better off in a fight. However his starting knife, a simple shame tier low damage knife was more of a kitchen knife than those. He decided it best to leave it here. He wouldn't give up the axe. If one day he could hold the Ork wok it would be fantastic for offense and defense but that would have to wait. He was still debating his two stat point allocations.

  “ My best suggestion would be to take some creative cooking classes. It doesn't seem like at least for now, the food you will find, or tools you use, will be that forgiving. Maybe even primitive cooking skills? I don't know what else to tell you, but I can say what you've done thus far.. is something my aged palette has never experienced. I would love to attribute that to you, but I'm going to lean on it being.. this place. Don't be discouraged, you're doing fantastic work. I may have bit the bullet, if things went any further south. I'm in your debt. I'll work it off. For starters though we need a bag or satchel of some kind. If we're trading these things to goblins, I'm not sure we just carry them, even more so with more people.”

  “ Yeah, well I think I have an idea. Just going to have to ask a friend a couple questions.” Lance said, opening up his messenger.

  ===

  Courage let out a sharp exhale from behind a barrel as a group of armed goblins passed everyone, each of them hiding amongst the containers.

  “ Guys this is getting pretty hairy, explain to me why we decided to do this ALONE, And why haven't we seen a checkpoint. We should really have just taken a day off and waited for Lance.” Valora said, holding her long braid in her fingers, twiddling it nervously.

  Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

  “Looks sis, we either set up the path forward or scout for information. These are just goblins yeah there's a lot but most of them are plain dumb. These little pop up camps are getting more and more common, and the light to outside is getting closer. It's far off but I don't know, it can't be more than a mile.” Courage said, pointing off into the distance.

  A cave mouth that from this distance was just a blinding white could be seen. The only indication they had that it was truly outside was the holes in the cave roof. Every so often a goblin sized hole above had mirrors that wound up into its cavity, bouncing light between them that beamed down onto the cave floor. The camps were set usually near these light wells which made great camping spots, but were either home to goblins or large spider webs that used the light to gather bugs for dinner. The stalactites, stalagmites, and speleothem here were getting more and more scarce as they moved towards the outdoors.

  “ The real plan is to get as many ingredients and experience gems for Lance and then start this floor over when he's ready to join us. We don't need to be risky, we just take the easy fights and the easy routes passed problems. And Valora there's no need to worry. With your new skill this is easy. We'll go as soon as your cooldown is up. How much longer?” Reilly said, straightening her clothes as she stood up, looking over the barrels and boxes at the distant backs of a pack of goblins.

  “ Two more minutes. What about you Courage, how's your.. friend.” Valora said, pointing to Courage's new pet.

  “ Ah, I think it's calmed down. It was afraid but it seems pretty lax now, won't let go of my shirt though.” Courage said lifting up his cape, a baby cave bat clung to his chest, it looked back at Valora and Reilly and then tucked itself back into his chest. “ I'm not really certain this guy has any reason for being in a fight or clung to me if we do fight. Reilly I need to get him used to you, can you please get over being afraid, it's just a baby”

  “ I am NOT afraid of that baby bat. I'm afraid of the bigger ones. I told you it's not worth keeping! It's just gonna slow us down if you're gonna worry about it like that. Either learn to protect it or set it free, I don't want bat poo or pee on me, not happening. Besides, I'm not always out of the fight, and you know that, I'm not changing my tactics to save a bat that's useless.” Reilly explained.

  Courage let out a sigh. His left arm being missing took away the chance for a shield. He had a third of his arm to just above the elbow, the end luckily healed up to look like just a nub, the first sight of it after the troll encounter was not pretty. He pulled down his sleeve and tied it off over the nub, and gently placed the baby bat on that sleeve. It clung and then fell asleep.

  Courage felt it was difficult for him to feel his phantom limb the way he did, he couldn't help but think he was flailing it around in his bed in real life.

  “Fine I get it. Don't worry he'll be my burden.. Alright Valora come on do it.” Courage said.

  “ Hold On, I just got a message from Lance!” Reilly stepped between them.

  “ Huh, I guess he's found us a tank! He needs me to answer some questions really quickly.” She paused between each reading to type in response. “ Well it looks like they are doing it alone. Just the two of them. Lance says to just farm low tier mobs and observe the goblins from a distance. Should I tell him we already killed 8? Damn…” Reilly then fell silent.

  Courage and Valora both looked at each other anticipating Reilly's readout. Reilly kept typing for a few more minutes. “ Well. Lance says he had a dish that can teach us goblin language. We need to gather ingredients, we should go backwards. “

  Courage and Valora both smiled brightly. Reilly began to salivate briefly and then wiped her lips. The trio went back towards the beginning of the floor.

  ===

  Lance and King both stepped into the Dungeon door appearing at their last checkpoint. Their game time clock showed just under three hours left. King and Lance both wore cloth bags, the remnants of a beginner class that started with one. They were 2 gems each, Lance spotted King a gem from his gear sales and then gave the item to him, another person to haul out material would pay for itself. They weren't anything special, but the pair each had the loot from this floor split amongst them. Lance came back wearing his full bat leather clothing. King still wore his regular clothes but the goblin weapons were straddled on his hips. Unfortunately King had to hold his Warhammer at all times but it wasn't that big an issue for him. The pair walked down the path the direction the goblins came until they both reached a torchlit crack in the rock hallway. Their nostrils burned with the smell of pungent goblin urine and poop from the corner to the left of them. They both took a moment to set up a long web tripwire that they dusted in sand making it hard to see against the sand path, just a few feet past the corridor.

  “Alright, wish me luck.” Lance said, as he tossed over his bag.

  “ I'll be here, ready just in case.” King shook his hammer. Lance pointed up and King nodded then climbed up into the stone spikes above.

  Lance took a deep breath and began to step down the corridor. The light around the bend got brighter and the sound of movement, louder. He could hear the cackle and roar of a large fire. Just as he could see around the bend he caught sight of a few goblins. Two of which played tug of war with a large haunch almost eaten to the bone with barely anything left. Another goblin lay amongst a pile of bat skins scratching dirt from under his nails with a small dagger. A grey bearded goblin who stood in front of the fire with a larger goblin turning a bat slowly. Two more goblins stood in the far right of the room, shoulder to shoulder in arms passing back a small gourd, both seemed intoxicated. Before any of them could notice him he stepped out quickly and announced himself.

  “What's up guys!” Lance tried his best to think that he was speaking goblin.

  The goblins all fell quiet. The drunk pair both looked up. The two fighting over the haunch stopped fighting, and the other three stared Lance down. Everyone froze . After a brief silence, the crackle of the fire broke the silence as the bat caught fire. The larger goblin began to turn the bat more and the grey bearded goblin stepped forward. The two goblins that were tug of warring came closer as well.

  “ You speak goblin well, human. Where art from?” the Grey bearded goblin said. He crossed him arms and the approaching goblins all stood in place in a semi circle to Lance just 5 feet away.

  “Oh, I'm from far away. But there's goblins there, I learned from them. The trader ones at least. I ended up getting lost in this cave, exploring. Think you can take me to the nearest city?” Lance did his best to seem unafraid. But he noticed the drunk goblins move to get gear on, the dagger wielding goblin sat up and began to pick his teeth with his knife. The large goblin brought the bat off the fire and began to chop into it atop a crate, still staring Lance down.

  The Grey bearded goblin smiled and looked around at the rest of the goblins.

  “ Trade? We trade. City not far, not for goblins like us. We can take you. We can take you but don't stay, trade then leave.”

  “ Very cool! What do you trade? Can I see?” Lance grew eager

  “ Ah-uh, slow human, we don't trust. Too many human, even gob speaking humans, hurt goblins. Show us what you have for trade, you first” the Grey bearded goblin put his hand on his hips and the rest of the goblins folded their arms.

  Lance hesitated but then he tossed over the bag in his hands that King gave him. In it was the loaf of bread, the goblin daggers, and the large slime prince geode, some goblin arrows but not the bow.

  If they could see his brow they would see sweat beading ready to drip. “Maybe this sac ain't so bad, I'm sure my face would give me away.” Lance thought.

  The two Goblins began to dig into the bag and pull things out. One by one they inspected the daggers, when they found the bread they broke it and tossed the halves back to the drunk goblins, now in bat jerkins and the dagger wielding goblin on the bat hides. They seemed rather unimpressed, and the grey bearded goblin didn't so much as move from looking at Lance and until one of the goblins spoke up.

  “AAAK, Grax look loook!” He said, tilting the bag forward.

  Grax greybeard checked the bag and his eyes grew wide. Quickly he reached inside and pulled out the Geode. He sniffed it then licked it. Lance gritted his teeth. He regretted bringing it but it was a last resort back up plan. He could see greed in their eyes. Grax finally spoke.

  “ What you want for the mana human? What's name you?”

  “Lance” he said, extending his hand. “ And for this I would like to go to have the rotisserie and escort.” He waited with his hand extended as Grax stared at him. The group of goblins stepped back and went and huddled together a few steps away speaking in hushed tones, leaving Grax near Lance.

  Slowly Grax put up his hand, and rather than shake Lance's, he waved him on “ It's good deal, come have bat. Meet friends.”

  “ Wait Grax, I have a friend back here, he was too scared I'll get him.”

  Grax paused then shook his head in a nod curtly. He turned back to the goblins and they returned to their ways. Lance grabbed the bag and ran back down the corridor.

  “ King, I did it! They are making a trade. And we can get passage.” A second later King dropped from the roof above. Lance began to grab the Web and stakes wrapping them up. “ Yeah they were actually pretty alright. Makes me kind of feel bad.”

  King smiled “ Well that makes this easy then, what'd they want? Did you get anything from them?”

  “ They agreed to the rotisserie. That's all I asked about.”

  “ Huh well alright. Good stuff kid.” King said, putting his bag on his back. The pair began to walk down the hallway.