Adrian stepped towards me, entering the lounge from the inquisitorial office. I held up World Religions for a moment, before turning to face him.

  “What are you doing he–” he began, but I cut him off.

  “You the one buyin’ those fancy rocks out there, boy?” I immediately said, talking before my brain could catch up.

  Adrian’s shoulders slumped and his startled expression relaxed into that boyish smile. “Ah? Aye, you noticed?”

  “Hard notta, with the wood markin’ the rest. What gives?”

  It felt like I was an observer to my own words, speaking first and thinking about what I was saying right after. It made my body want to cringe, to violently take away and shut my mouth. Yet, I couldn’t.

  “Awh, shucks. You know how it is. Your Ma an’ Pa were mine too, sis?” he chuckled, raising his hand up to the back of his head and scratching his hair.

  “Addy, I swear to Amaril above, if you call me sis one more time I will drive your head in hog slop, ya hear?” I growled. It felt too violent and ‘not tactical’ - this was clearly the way to start a fight.

  Yet, Adrian raised his hands in defense, waving it in front of him helplessly. Even though he was armed to the teeth, wearing that silly tricorne hat and covering his face underneath the scarf. “Aight! Aight! I meant nothin’ by it!”

  “Gosh, Addy. It’s still Ashy, an’ I was here checkin’ on my folks, Mr. ‘Do you even go visit, Ashley’? What on Elora’s name are you doin’ here and not letting Melly scold you out instead?”

  Adrian lowered his scarf and then frowned. “You remember that? I was hopin’ you’d forge–”

  “Addy, I rightly don’ care if you think me an awful daughter or what have you, but you’re not gettin’ away from answerin’ what you’re doin’ here.”

  “You ain’t! Swear it! Jus’ you didn’ come back for Ma’s, funeral, si—sly. Sisly.”

  So I threw the book at his face. This time, with the training I had guiding daggers, it hit him directly in the forehead with a satisfying thud.

  “OW! I deserved that,” he muttered, rubbing his skull. “And besides, Ashy - I work here. Why’ja come at night?” He took another breath, trying to calm himself. "I mean, why are you here?”

  “I just told ya. Family’s graves.”

  “Which are outside…?” Adrian continued.

  “An’? Is there no law that I can’t be comin’ into the church of the Good Protector at night?”

  “Ashy, you know what I meant. Why are you even in the lounge?”

  “Uhhh….” I felt my conscious mind try to take over, to stop myself from talking out loud. But I was still just reacting. “...I came to find an artifact for my quest, need to make a special room.” I.. told the truth? None of that was really a lie.

  Adrian seemed to consider that for a moment, but my head was still not winning this war of control. I snapped my fingers and clicked my tongue, walking towards him for the dumbest of reasons.

  “Uh-uh! I asked you a question, boy. You work here an’ all, but it’s dark out! Your Melly is goin’ to be worried sick! I’m at least committin’ an act of robbery in my goddess name, but you? What are ya thinkin’?”

  And again, he went on the defensive. He walked backwards into the office which made it an easy follow. “Your new friend! Lord Birchi–Birch.”

  “Noel Birchigold, yes, the Duke’s younger brother, but I asked about you boy.” I continued, and Adrian, for his part, grabbed my shoulders and forced me to sit down on a cushioned seat.

  I didn’t stop glaring.

  “You drink?”

  “Of course, who doesn’t drink? You’re stallin’.”

  Adrian nodded, and moved to his side of the room and behind his table. He opened a drawer and pulled out the fanciest glass vial holding honey-like liquid inside. However, he didn’t say anything.

  “What? What’s this got to do with Melly?” I was growing impatient.

  He sighed again and took a small glass. He poured two fingers worth of amber liquid, and then conjured ice in his hand. He dropped a few cubes in his cup, and then turned to me.

  “Neat?”

  “What? Of course.” I responded, and he just pushed the cup towards me. I leaned forward to grab it, and he raised his cup to me.

  “To our health.”

  I watched him and did nothing. He leaned over the table, and clinked his glass against mine. “To our health,” he repeated again and took a sip.

  Adrian always made this awkward. I however gracefully followed his move.

  The drink was heavy, and tasted like both barley or rye aged with sugar, and then mixed with just sweet and creamy honey. It was so sweet, but then? It tasted like a harsh flame that burned my throat, and I immediately choked.

  “Slowly, Ashy! It’s a sipping drink, not a down.”

  “What is this?”

  “...Whiskey? You said you drink?”

  “This is whiskey?!” I responded, looking at the cup. “And no, I meant I just drink, not, whatever this is.”

  Adrian just let out another sigh, but began to laugh. “Of course that’s what you meant. So, Lord Birchigold told me that he wants to investigate Flowers-By-the-River. Says he believes the [Vampyre] is located there.”

  “What?” I immediately said, even though I knew exactly what he was talking about. Yet, I could hear the shock in my own voice.

  “Yeah. There’s a known one there, Matthew Dawnwater, but…”

  “Let me guess, there’s some legal loophole the Queen has that’s protectin’ him?”

  “Huh? Nah, Queen’s Law won’t get in the way of the [Arbiter]. Man’s just gone missin’ I mean, even more missin’ than underworld folks tend to be.”

  “So, that’s the only [Vampyre]?” I asked, which caused Adrian to blink at me. He studied my face, before his eyes opened up. He sighed.

  “Noel told you, didn’t he?”

  I said nothing in response.

  “Yes, Ballory is being accused of being a [Blood Witch], and Noel thinks she runs the Sil– a criminal organization.”

  “The Silent Path,” I ‘confirmed’.

  “Ah, he did. Then yes, the good Headmistress of YOUR Academy is secretly a criminal mastermind! What’s next, professors planning world domination?”

  I tilted my head. “What, my little farming boy is going off to play kid detective?”

  “I wish! Alicia is there too, and I rather not have Ballory suspect I have an inkling on her.”

  “Alicia? She’s there now?”

  “She was in your academy, Ashley!”

  “Oh. Sorry, Addy. I don’t really know much ‘bout your family. I think your brother is a guard here too?”

  He groaned. “Don’t remind me. Bastard’s already got a debt with MY name on it on the taverns. And we only have one! Bloody Mr. Fletcher knows I’ll pay for his damn tab even if I never gave him the go ahead.”

  I couldn’t help but chuckle, and take another sip of this burning concoction. Adrian took a sip as well, before talking.

  “So yeah, we’re thinkin’ of asking Jazzy to go, but what if –”

  “I’ll do it.” I immediately offered, my heart beating as soon as I heard that name. I said I’d protect her.

  “..To go back to your own academy? Aren’t you already done?”

  “Never did the exams, just got blessed, boy.”

  “Wow, that smart? You’d make Ma proud, sis.”

  “You’re lucky the only thing in my hand has something I’m drinkin’ in it.”

  “Only reason I knew I’d get away with it,” he teased back.

  “So, why are you here, and not by Melly’s side then? Not like you're sending her to the wolf - if Noel is right.”

  “We’re in a small fight right now. The entire thing that happened with her Ma was caused since I didn’t bother giving that damn witch - Mother Illya - her due. But I told her we don’t need her, when we have a [Chirurgeon] who’s our family friend - thank you for Melly’s Ma, by the way - and those Floran’s are getting out of hand. So we both got into a small fight, and I told her she has to start caring about the people around her, and she said I need to care about my career, and what do you know, I’m in the doghouse.”

  If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. Please report it.

  “Wow, that sounds awful, Addy. And here I am havin’ borin’ trouble with my farm. I mean, now I’m havin’ trouble with you offering my ACTUAL SISTER, boy, as bait to a [Vampyre] that Noel suspects, but before that? I just bought too many seeds! I cant water them all. If that lord didn’t help, I’d have already ruined the fields!”

  “Flora, that must be so frustrating, not being able to handle your own crops!”

  “Yeah, I know! It’s like I’m just tryin’ to make a plan but then I forget something.”

  “Yeah, as Pa always said, ‘You ain’t done in the fields till you’re done in the fields’”

  We both began to laugh.

  “You think about gettin’ a mule then, Ashy? You probably did, yeah?”

  “A mule? For like 100 gold? Why would I want one of those?”

  “Ah, I recall you and I used to water the crops in the mornings, and our biggest issue was just walking to the river. A mule can carry water and go with you as you water the plants, and they also lessen the amount of trips to the river - or the well.”

  I stood up! That was an immediate fix to my problems, and it was something I could do!

  “Gah! Why didn’t I think of that? I could use those things! I could use animals! That’d be easier than setting up a sprinkler system.”

  Adrian tilted his head. “But a sprinkler system wouldn’t be as fun. You’d just refill the water, and never get the dirt between your toes?”

  “I know! But I’m trying to make my farm bigger, and pa had a sprinkler system. Otherwise he’d have never been able to water all the crops.”

  “Eh? I thought your old man just used better tools. Are you not a [Farmer] yet, Ashley, and able to use your tools stronger versions?”

  I stopped chattering and stared annoyedly at his face. “Yeah! So what? It’s not my fault that the next thing I gotta do requires me to wait for summer!”

  “Oh, one of those ones. Ah, Ash, just build a green house then? Even a small one? You can grow summer crops there, or, I guess medicinal herbs? Amaril knows the town needs more medicine, and you’d be in a good position to help.”

  I blinked again. I unlocked greenhouses, and never used them. I leaned in over the table and grabbed Adrian’s head, and then kissed his forehead. “YES! SOLUTIONS TO MY PROBLEMS.”

  Adrian pushed away, utterly confused as I planned my next moves. I could get a mule for now and start seeing how to get water there - or find a dead horse and raise it. That would be a lot easier, since killing wild horses would be a fun challenge.

  And making a greenhouse? I could do that! I could make those! I could make summer crops, like Broccoli, and then get the next rank upwards. I was so close to being a real [Farmer]!

  “Hey, Ashley, you do realize you volunteered yourself to go talk to a [Vampyre], right?”

  “Aye? That’s just work?” I immediately responded.

  “Amaril, that nutter personality of yours really shines now that you’re a [Cryotheurge], huh? Going off bein’ this weird girl who acts like a scarecrow guardian’ her fields. Flora’d say its unnatural, but Nyla – Right, you needed a holy artifact for her?”

  I turned around and pointed my finger at him. “I ain’t no nutter! I just like farmin’ you know!”

  He tilted his head. “No, this is the nutter side,” he said, just motioning at me directly. “Who’d take care of your fields if you died. hmm?”

  “I ain’t gonna die. I got farmin’ to work on. This is just the borin’ stuff around it.”

  “And that doesn’t sound Crazy to you, Ashley? I was wondering how much I’d have to pay Jasmine for or explain to Melissa that we’re killing her best friend, likely – and you come in, volunteer yourself, state you’re stealing from a church for a quest, like its nothing. I’d say that’s proper nutter behaviour.”

  It was my turn to tilt my head, while pursing my lips. “Aye, now that you say that, It’s sounding right crazy. But eh, that’s just work that has to be done. I gotta make Pa and Ma’s farm the best it can be, and yeah…”

  “...Much harder. Gotta balance doing it right and doing it proper, huh?”

  “Yeah! Go talk to the old headmistress and find out if she’s a criminal mastermind is just… it happens or it doesn’t. But like, getting a mule? Where do I house it? Where do I feed it? How do I feed it? Do I need a brush?”

  “All valid concerns… but you don’t see the other mission like that?”

  “Nah, I’m smart enough to figure it out. Otherwise I’ll just overthink it and get in my own way.”

  “Uh… huh. Do your holy artifacts need to be from Nyla?”

  “Oh? Uh… any.”

  He nodded and pulled out another chalice. “It’s just a weak Transmutation enhancement, makes wine blessed. Should be enough for your quest, yeah?”

  I held it – and it felt like flames in my hand. The holy energy burned against my skin, but I ignored it. I put it into my inventory. “Just givin’ it to me? Like that? And here I was planning to steal one in that box out there…”

  “The tabernacle. And stealin’? Protector, you are crazy, and admittin’ it to an [Inquisitor].”

  “Bite me.” I bit the air, which again, caused him to back off. “Besides, I like this new me. I’m all powerful now, and I’ll be making the best farm and vegetable shop.”

  “Lucky you. And word around town is you’re also going to be starting a doctor’s shop. Mrs. Carnwich is all better, Melly’s Ma, and the people are hoping you’re going to set up shop. Hart’s Vegetable and Medical advice, they say.”

  “Ah? They’re goin’ to lissen to the haughty-toity noble lady now, are they?” I questioned.

  “Haughty-Toity Noble Lady? Have they even met you? Only two of those words describe you!”

  “I know! Wait…” I said, before moving to slap Adrian’s head. He fended me off! Rude.

  “I meant Haughty and Lady!”

  “THAT’S NOT BETTER!”

  “What, are you not a lady?!”

  I lunged at him and he quickly evaded.

  He laughed. “And that’s why I’m comfortable with it. You just don’t seem that different. I’m sure whatever altar you’re making is going to be great. But yeah, I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t ask you, as a personal favour to me and the town, to set up a clinic.”

  “I’ll consider it!” I repeated, still more annoyed than angry. Adrian however kept looking at me. “What?”

  “Well, like…”

  “Yeah?”

  “I better not say it.”

  “Boy…”

  “Okay! I mean, the only other person I’ve seen that has white hair like that is like.. Lady McReer or, I guess, Father Farrow? Auntie Laura is start–”

  I lunged at him and slapped him. “I AM NOT OLD YOU PIG.”

  “I WASN’T SAYING THAT! I WAS JUST SAYING THE ONLY ONES WITH THAT HAIR ARE –”

  I slapped him again. “AMARIL. YOU DESERVE TO BE SLEEPING HERE ALONE.” I shouted, taking the entire bottle of whiskey off his desk, the chalice he had given me, and his pen for good measure. “THESE ARE MINE NOW.”

  And I stormed out.

  Adrian rubbed his face, but didn’t follow.

  Ophelia met me outside, but I was still storming. She came up beside me, and I handed her the blessed chalice. It immediately burned her skin and she dropped it.

  So I handed her the Whiskey, which she inspected and gave an appreciative smile, and the pen. I then picked up the chalice.

  “Ophelia!”

  “Yes, Mistress?”

  “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME I LOOK OLD?”

  “What? You look like an angry adolescent at best, Lady Hart,” she said, dropping her ‘vampiric’ tone into one of utter exasperation.

  “I HAVE WHITE HAIR!”

  “Yes? So do I? You don’t think I look old do you?”

  I stared at her, and her red eyes, and youthful expression. But the white hair did not help. Now that Adrian mentioned it, it was the only thing I noticed.

  “We will dye OUR hair red!”

  “...I will do no such thing. And, if that is a proper witchmark, you’re going to have to re-dye it almost everyday. And, you know… your eyebrows and other hair will still remain white.”

  I frowned at this horrible news. “So you’re telling me I look old!”

  “...You look like an angry, lanky doll. Do you want me to show you how to dress?”

  “Fine! This is acceptable. Also, we need to kill a horse.”

  “A horse?”

  “Yes, to solve my watering problem.”

  “...To water the fields that you have rain on?”

  “That’s temporary Ophelia!”

  “...Did you accomplish your task, Lady Hart?”

  “Yeah? I’m holding the chalice. I’m also going back to the Academy to retake my exams to meet my headmistress that may or may not be Elizabeth Bazerie or Headmistress Ballory.”

  Ophelia halted, and took a deep breath. “Rhyvesta made me babysit a nutter,” she muttered.

  “No! This is the nutter part! The farming is the only normal part about me!”

  That made Ophelia laugh. “I guess that is true. Who did you even meet inside?”

  “An Amaril Forsaken pig.”

  “Your obsession with that man is going to get you killed,” she repeated.

  I shook my head. “Nah, I’m going to kill him and his lousy, lying, pig-slop eating mouth.”