PART ONE n – the Party

  In my Wizard of Oz movie? God, its fucked up. Dorothy was gang raped. By half the small town. They all point and ugh at her for it, she doesn't get to py victim. Her mom beat her up for getting gang raped, made her be nice to the lead rapist. Pretended it wasn't so, because the guy with the bigger farm she was dating wouldn't be… uncomfortable with having a gang rapist for a son. Appearances are everything. Reality is nothing. Dorothy is the daughter of the wicked witch, and no one will throw a bucket of water to melt the cunt. Dorothy's sweet and innocent dress? Anything but, she dresses like a hooker with money would for casual wear.

  Some drunken asshole edited this fucked up fairy tale. Pieces of gang rape caught on security camera. Oz, the scary and dangerous outside world? Far better a pce than home ever was. And just when this travesty of cinematic ineptitude is finally about to begin to wrap up with something resembling an ending everyone might be able to live with, here come the flying monkeys. You can't even tell who the tin man is, the scarecrow, the lion, none of them. Why can't the scary music quit. Shit's about to get all fucked up.

  There ain't no way this situation is going to reverse itself into another surprisingly perfect ending. I can't even see some good alpha around, so Sigma Boy is going to have to shit Sigma Lightning and py Alpha. Ain't no one going to be happy. This isn't a fucked up fairy tale. Its a goddamn nightmare. The warm barrel we nestled down into and got comfy? Filled with soft, dry stuff, that's surprisingly comfortable. That's gunpowder. We're all in it. Someone can't see what's going on in the dark, and is waving a lit match around. Powder keg's about to explode, and all my dolls are going to get scattered.

  No one is good, no one is bad. Dorothy? Half slut, half sweet innocent girl. I guess I'm supposed to be the good girl, and look how I'm dressed. Wiz is actually a good guy, great even. But… to Army boy and his henchmen? He looks like a bad guy right now. Army guy's character is all over the map. He's the nice boyfriend. He called her a whore, for no real reason. She sort of deserves her past coming up, she sort of doesn't too. Now him and his henchmen? Are they good guys operating on completely understandable bad misinformation? This is all so misunderstood and totally fucked up, its unreal. Hollywood couldn't come up with a plot point like this, even if they put the director known for his twists and reversals, with the writer known for his twists and reversals into a room together, and gave them beer and LSD to see what they would come up with.

  But, here it is. Wizard of Oz remake. Rated X. Mature content may not be appropriate for younger audience members. Warning. May contain rape, sexual assault, adult situations and strong sexuality content. Some drug and alcohol use. Graphic violence.

  I wondered about the graphic violence part. Here it comes. He can take any one of them, and they know that. But he can't take all of them, and they know that and he knows that, too. He could get hurt. Any or all of them could get hurt. Maybe all of them will get hurt, and hurt each other. Lightning could even get a punch in the mouth out of it all. The athletes? They don't appreciate what's probably about to happen. They could hurt all of them, or they could all get hurt by them. Or, more likely, everyone gets hurt and everyone hurts one another. Hurt buffet, I guess is what its looking like.

  I walked over to the drink table, and found a beer bottle with a couple swigs left. I nonchantly dumped it out, and decided it was a great thing to have in my hand. I'm not watching my boyfriend go to the emergency room, not without splitting someone's skull open. I want my punch in the mouth too. I didn't join the boys club, then rejoin it for nothing. If you run or hide when these things happen, and don't at least get your bck eye? You get your boy card revoked. Fuck that. I treasure it too much. Or, I'm going to protect Lightning. Or hit a fellow athlete over his head? Or one of the Army guys to protect them. Christ's throne, this is fucked up. Trying to expin it all ter? That's going to be a fun process too.

  I'm standing now. Near enough the hot tub, with Wiz and Light sitting alone.

  "Hey Wiz."

  "Boys… how's it going."

  "We were watching an old war movie on cable. I got a couple of texts and pics and movies. Curious?"

  "Sure…"

  He's got that grin. He doesn't look nervous. I know enough about him, to know he's sizing this all up. The Army guys though. They're a little nervous. Body nguage. Mostly crossed arms. Defensive postures. You use numbers though, if you have to.

  "My ex girlfriend. Is up here, at a Vilge crawl. Kicking the shit out of some drunk guy. You might not know we broke up."

  He took a sip of his drink. They might figure he's drunk. Its all mixer, for a while now. He's sober. They might not be.

  "Oh, that. My girlfriend, is her best friend. All roomies. How could I not know. Five minutes after she hits the townhouse, I get the rundown."

  "And what do you think about that?"

  "Told Light here. Sorry your shit didn't work out. Looked like it was for a minute there. Them's the breaks. Now? I'd say the same thing to you."

  "Wow. One thing isn't completely fucked up. At least you know we broke up. There's that."

  "Well? If you saw her fight video. The guy? One of the assholes I used to have to put up with, down at the Pardee house. Sees me here, having fun. Wouldn't quit fucking with me, ask anyone. I was about… this close? He was forcing me to tune him up. Then? Light here drops his drunk ass. For me. I guess you saw the video. Beautiful work. She didn't get hurt, guy deserved it. Hell, all I had to do? Take out the trash, toss him in the dumpster. Party entertainment. Little floor show."

  "Yeah. That wasn't all the entertainment up here. Was it."

  "Its a party. If there wasn't entertainment? People would have gone home. They're still here, so yeah. Its been fun."

  "Wanna guess some of the entertainment I've seen? Keeps coming in, I can't even enjoy the second war movie, the sequel to the first one."

  "Why don't you tell me. If you didn't stop up to have a beer, I guess you came to let me know what I might have missed. Even though I'm here."

  "Well. Here's one. A couple of them, actually. Hot tub party. Wow. Looks like fun."

  "Actually? Yeah. It was. It is. But… its a party. Almost everyone? Is here to have fun."

  "I can see that. Ping pong. Oh, and dancing. Wiz? I honestly didn't know you could dance."

  "Well? I'll try to keep you updated on all my new hobbies."

  He sighed while his Army buddies are gncing at one another. Other than her ex? They don't like this. Maybe they did at first, but now? They don't like the look and feel of things. He's acting way too calm given the situation, and they can smell that.

  The athletes are starting to pick up on quiet tension. One thing about jocks, all streetwise. Little groups are forming, trying not to be noticed. Couple wrestlers over there, couple football guys over there. Soccer girls, another spot. Unaffiliated people, who don't belong to one or more people of the established groups, are forming their own little huddle. I don't know if the mixed herd even realizes that its segregating itself, could be an automatic response.

  He lowered his voice.

  "Wiz. Will you level with me."

  "Ever known me to lie?"

  "Not really."

  "Probably won't start now. Just ask. It doesn't hurt to ask. Politely."

  "Are we friends? I thought, we were friends. Buddies. You know. We were all in the service. Little bit of us against them, the damn civilians. Buddies."

  "We're not friends."

  He looked slightly shocked at such a dead panned and glib response. His Army henchmen all gnced at one another. This was a surprising twist, that much was obvious.

  "Excuse me?"

  "I said. We're not friends."

  "The fuck are we then…"

  "Best friends. I thought me, you, all of then? Were best friends."

  "Well, yeah. I thought we were, anyways."

  "Were. Past tense. What happened?"

  "Wiz? What's it been now. Two years? A little more. I think we all spotted haircuts and T shirts in the gym about a week in, been like that since."

  "Yeah."

  "For two years. You were Wiz. I like Wiz. We all like Wiz. Wiz likes us. The st couple months or so now? We're all… like who are you, and what have you done with Wiz."

  "What's so different. My eyes change color, or something?"

  "Started out okay. You got a new girlfriend. Happy for you."

  "That part was pretty cool. Thanks."

  "You got out of… the Groundhog hole. You live up here with the rich kids now. Good for you."

  "And that part? Was actually pretty cool too. Thanks again."

  "You're a jeans and T shirts kind of guy. Your new girl? Her too. Well, she was a jeans and T shirt girl anyways…"

  He held out one of the hot tub movies someone made. And, obviously sent to his phone.

  "Mind if I make a suggestion? A polite one."

  "Sure."

  "Don't bring my girlfriend into this. And if you do? You don't get an opinion on how she's dressed. That's between me, her, and her closet. There's probably a guy rule on that one. You get an opinion on how your own girl is dressed. You don't get an opinion on how some other girl is dressed."

  "Oh. A guy rule. Interesting way to put it."

  "Why is that so interesting…"

  "Wiz. I'm getting texts. Describing what's going on. No way. So I get pictures. Now, you can color a picture with different crayons. What happened before, what happened after. What might even really be going on. I can dig that. That? Was what interrupted the sequel. But then… I get videos. They're as bad, actually? Even worse than the texts."

  "You see what's going on at the fun party I'm at. You can see its fun. Kinda party you come up for to have some fun. Or… maybe you came up to not have fun…"

  He's using soft nguage. Another Sigma specialty. When he described the drunk Pardee house kid, he kind of drew out the part where he was just about to get up out of the hot tub and handle it. Which was when Lightning handled it for him. You could detect a polite hint there. Or you could miss it, or even think it was coincidence.

  The hints were very polite. Everyone is here to have fun. He adroitly stopped him, before he said something or called me something, about the way I was suddenly dressed, and how I cavorted in the hot tub. I suppose though, just in case his buddy wasn't getting his hints? The st one… maybe you guys aren't here to have fun. There's no missing that one, polite or not. His flying monkey henchmen were gncing at each other a lot more now. I don't think I ever once heard a direct warning delivered quite so sweetly, ever. How many hints he'd go for, or for how long? Anyone's guess. For now though, the flying monkeys were stationary. The scary music stopped. Temporarily.

  "Guy rules. Okay. You're right, I don't get an opinion on how your girl dresses. I get an opinion on how mine is dressed. Or actually, not dressed. Wouldn't you say."

  He looked around. He feigned slight confusion.

  "Now I'm confused. If you have a girl, you do get an opinion on how she dresses. Perhaps you could point her out for me."

  They all looked at one another, and he just shoveled his hand at the hot tub.

  Now he feigned ignorance.

  "You mean Light here?"

  "No. I mean some other girl you have your hand on her tits in the hot tub."

  "Sarcasm. Verbal irony. Nice touch."

  "What's the… guy rule on that? Since you bring guy rules up and all."

  "Well. You guys? Have been giving me advice for about two years now. And, taught me the guy rules, too."

  "Which guy rule, says you can… fuck me Wiz, you were here. You know what kind of videos I got sent, for Christ's sake. I'm looking at one now."

  He looked at Little Lightning.

  "This isn't your girl. Not anymore."

  "I can see that now, for myself."

  Lightning left him in the hot tub, hands over her tan little tits. She didn't look embarrassed, she didn't look frightened. She looked like she was making herself small, and getting out of the way. Maybe she wanted to disappear, or blend in. Blend out. Whatever. She dried off in seconds, though moving slow. She slipped socks then her jeans on. Dropped her shirt on and stepped into her tenners. She more or less, inched away.

  "Want me to go over the guy rules that cover this?"

  "Oh. I can't wait."

  "They're your rules. I'm surprised you need them repeated back to you."

  "Oh, I'm all ears."

  "You. Back there… no, you. When I was always talking to the girl, the one at the coffee shop? Yeah. I went there one day, actually for my regur thing. I was supposed to sit down with her on her lunch break. We have coffee. We talk. Our thing. I come in one day, for our little coffee date… you're in my seat, in my booth. Did I say a single word to you."

  He looked around.

  "I'm being polite. It would be polite to answer me. We're so far, having a polite conversation. Is anything about what I just described, not accurate. I went for my regur coffee date, with my regur coffee girl I was working on. And… there you are. Did I say one single word."

  "Uh… no, actually…"

  "Did I compin?"

  "Well, no."

  "Shit happens. Life goes on. When I brought it up, at our beer BBQ night… what was the ruling on that?"

  "Well…"

  "Right. The coffee girl I took you guys to see, cause you wanted to see what I was trying to work? One of you now knew my schedule, got there early for lunch break. Sat in my seat, and that's how that went. I asked if that was a dick move, and everyone told me no, that wasn't. The girl? Would rather have coffee lunch with you, instead of me. I remember tapping my beer on yours, shit was fine. Guy rule."

  He didn't say anything.

  "And you. Right behind him. I dragged one of the computer girls into the gym with me. Started working out with her. We always came in together. We always left together. Then, one day… you? Were there early. You guys were ughing and working out. Remember that?"

  He didn't say anything.

  "Did I say a word."

  Nothing. He's looking around, shifting his feet around.

  "No, I did not. I already knew the rule, but I brought it up at the next BBQ. Once again, there was a guy rule. Same guy rule. Have fun."

  A different one said something.

  "He's two for two."

  "I thought maybe? Those were both dick moves. But, turned out, they were fine. Hey. I do py by the rules. There might have been one or two others in the st two years? But, they were way less than these two. Which brings us right around to now."

  "I gotta hear this one…"

  "I got a new girlfriend. She kinda moved me in. Girls wanted me to bring some guys up, for a BBQ. I brought a bunch of you up. Several times. Two of you ended up dating those girls. One of those girls, was Lightning. Following me so far?"

  "Yeah."

  "Now. Did you, or did you not… compin at the gym, pretty much daily. How your girlfriend dresses. What you heard. How this isn't going to work. Now… what did I tell you, every single time. You tell me."

  "Well…"

  "Every time, I told you what I was hearing from my girlfriend. That she's hearing from Light. Her best friend, her room mate. How much she likes you. How she isn't seeing anyone else. How she wishes you weren't mad at her, for… dating a couple guys st year. Did I, or did I not… do my best, to keep you two together. Because the girl liked you, and asked me to help. True or false."

  "Kinda true…"

  "Kinda true? Or just… true."

  "Okay. Yeah."

  "Did I once, go and report back, what you called her. Every time you compined about her. What word you used? Not once. I kept that shit to myself. You guys? Will sneak into my seat, the minute my ass leaves the chair to go take a piss. Me? I'm trying to keep your thing going. For my best buddy, and, for my girlfriend's bestie roomie. I'm a goddamn saint, is what I am. Ask anyone that knows me. I'm simply too nice. My biggest fw."

  "Yeah. I can see how nice you are…"

  "I introduced you to her. Me and my girlfriend, gave you our blessing to date. I never once tried to sit in your seat at the coffee house, I never once tried to slip onto the weight bench when you got up to take a piss. I didn't tell her what you said about her every day, and I tried to keep you two together as best I could. Because? She liked you. But… brings us to today."

  "Yeah."

  "When I woke up this morning? As of I had gone to bed, you two were still dating. Light walked home. You got tired of compining about her, you called her a whore. Again. And broke up with her. She walked home, you didn't even have the decency to give her a st ride up the hill. Whatever though. Now then. Your girl? You talked shit on her the whole time, you were mad she wasn't a virgin I guess, you called her a whore. And dumped her. That's the shit I woke up to this morning."

  He got no answer. Nothing but crickets.

  "We come to the party. My girlfriend, so far, has no problem sharing me with her best friend and room mate. You got videos? Maybe you didn't get all of them, I can probably find you some more. She likes me. She's been hanging all over me, ask anyone here. We're pying in the hot tub, that's me, my girl, and her too now. Gotta tell you? Its been fun. Best fucking birthday, I ever had. I've been kissing her, I've been getting dancing lessons. I had fun pying ping pong. My girlfriend scratched the hell out of my back and my legs, and Lightning? Well, she's responsible for all the bite marks all over my shoulders."

  Nothing.

  "But there's no way I vioted any guy rules, not a one. I'm allowed to show up early at the coffee house. I'm allowed to show up early at the gym. And I don't. But there's no way, this is your girl. This all happened after I woke up today. Figured I'd tell you about it, as best I could? At the gym. Monday. But name me one thing I did wrong. I'm waiting."

  Lightning wasn't shrinking away. She was dried off and dressed, and out of the line of sight, out of the line of fire. She was working and inching her way up and off from the side of the pack. She might even be working her way close, to do the ostrich technique again. Same situation as earlier, someone came and threatened her Wizzy in the hot tub. She might be getting ready to give the same response. Wouldn't be out of line. Same stimuli? Same response. He called her a whore, dumped her, and told her to walk home. He was done with her. Called her a skank and everything else, trying to make her cry. More I thought about it? The more she probably was. Fuck. This situation is surprisingly static, and possibly defusing itself. Don't do it, Light. We're all standing in a powder keg, a lit match got a squirt of piss dribbled on it. Don't light another match, we probably won't get lucky twice in a row.

  "So. We're all good then. Great…"

  He got up, and pretty much did what Lightning had done. Did a speed dry, and got dressed quick. He ambled over to his army buddies, instead of trying to ooze away.

  "Anything I said… not accurate? Any of it."

  "I guess not… but…"

  "But what."

  "You've… I don't know. You're just a different person, the st month or two. What. You have all new friends up here, I guess."

  "Guys? Since we're all best buddies. Since none of us vioted any guy rules. I can only assume you guys came up? Because you saw a fun party on the videos. To congratute me? On my sudden lucky streak. Been having a two year run of shitty luck with housing, with girls, with everything. I never compined. I'm enjoying the winning streak, while its going. I was happy for you, when you got your new truck. Be happy back. I need a drink. Its a party…"

  He smoothly got his arm around Lightning, and steered her away from her ostrich maneuver she might be about to pull off twice, going for two in a row. Wouldn't be the first time that she ever scored two goals in a row, with the same maneuver. He tipped a spsh of schnapps down into his mixer filled cup, and sipped the little mixing straw. He walked Lightning back over to the group.

  He kissed her neck, right in front of them.

  "To you? She was a whore. To me? Well, I think she's pretty amazing…"

  He kissed her more for a little bit, right in front of everyone. The situation was entirely defused. There seemed to be no more matches to try to light. Someone squirted a little warm water down in our little powder keg we were all nestled into. It was getting comfy again. So far.

  I walked over, dressed as I was, and put my arm around him on the other side. To show my approval.

  "Oh. Hi, honey. Where you been, huh…"

  He kissed my neck.

  "Now. Drink table's over there. In there? Ping pong, internet music and big speakers. Karaoke if you do that, but mercifully no one started that shit yet. Hot tub? Towels on the bench. If you didn't bring a suit? Well… doesn't really matter. Now then. While you boys obviously think I have all new friends, and I forgot who my friends are? I've been up here, trying to help you guys out. Honey? How's Lida and the whole… Barracks and Girl's soccer mixer going? Hmm? Boys are right here. Lida's here somewhere, its her townhouse."

  "You know? That's a great idea. I'll go get her."

  "Come on, Light… help me find Lida… she's around here somewhere…"

  As we were slowly making our way out of the line of fire, that was no longer about to go hot, I saw and heard the rest. He smiled and gnced around, to make sure they were out of earshot. With no entertainment developing? The herd mixed back up, music went back on, ughter and bragging resumed. He leaned in to speak quietly, so as not to make it a public shot.

  "No more calling my new girlfriend a whore. I mean, that goes without saying. Now. Let me just guess, I have a crystal ball because I live with them all. Uh, you. Your girl probably dumped you, pretty much right after Lightning got called a whore, and had to walk home, and texted her about it. How am I doing here…"

  "That's about it."

  "Yeah. I'm a guy. Gossip and updates can wait for the gym for me usually. I didn't know I had to be texting every ten minutes like a bitch, so everyone can keep up. You boys, broke the ice by dating the starting right and left wing on the girls soccer team. Now? Seems like the rest of the team wants a crack at some fresh meat. They're bored trading the same football pyers back and forth."

  "Really?"

  "You see this party. You already saw how much fun these things can be, right? Video proof and all. This? Is a mixer. This one, was football and girls soccer mixer. The girls soccer team? Wants a mixer with… bum bum bum… the Army house, which is what they call the Barracks. Since you're all single now… what do you think will happen, huh? Why, the girls that were jealous of Little Lightning and Right, finding fresh meat? Well… do the math. You boys want a tip?"

  "Uh. Sure."

  "Here's the basic plot line. The girls? Are all competitive. Once a girl scores a guy, all the other girls try to move in. Called sport-fucking. You fuck your team mate's guy, then tell her about it. For fun. You bitch. Then? They do it back. Now, for the guys that get in on this? Well… imagine the possibilities. Here's another tip. I've been watching this fucking soap opera, for going on two month's now, from the inside. Never ceases to amaze me. Here's how this works. The girls? Are competing. For fresh meat. Which? Is all of y-o-u boys."

  "Competing?"

  "Hey. The little Army fighting house? Is like a brand new sports team to them. I'm sure you can imagine if we all pyed some sport. We'd all be keeping score, who had more girls. They're the same, they're worse. Now, in addition to the sport-fucking? Only rule is, when you get dumped? Don't make a fuss. Hey, whatever. Now, you're on the menu. The other girls circle in like vultures. Sometimes? The other girls already know you're dumped, before you do. Its called throwing your bestie a dick. Aw, you poor thing. She was so mean to you. Come over and tell me all about it."

  "You're not serious."

  "The girls? Are going to trade you poor bastards, like baseball cards. Keep your mouth shut, get sport-fucked, and don't make a scene when you get dumped. The next one is coming right along, or the others are circling like vultures. Your mission? Should you choose to accept it… is you all get to slowly fuck your way through the entire roster of the girls soccer team. Lots of nice legs I see, by the way. If you're a leg man. No one else will tell you these rules. I just did. Keep it under your hat. Mouth? Shut. Zippers? Open. And, this little scene tonight? You wanna avoid that. I'm not asking you guys to get married, I thought my buddies would enjoy next semester, hell, whole next year."

  "Anything else?"

  "Uh, let's see. Oh. The girls basketball and volleyball teams? Have a kinda, unofficial… back and forth sport-fucking thingy going on. You guys can slowly branch out, each pick your own team? And… fuck your way through the rosters. This, should carry you through to graduation, if my spastic geek calcutions are correct."

  "And… why are we suddenly in such demand again?"

  "There's only so many sports teams, boys. A house full of Army guys, fighting guys? Kinda like an unofficial new boys sports team has been discovered. And the girls are going to cw each others eyes out, to see who gets to fuck which one next. So… now then. Who's your buddy, who's your pal. Who didn't keep it all to himself, and shared the inside track with you. Hmm? Oh, that's right. Me. If you don't believe me? Lida, who's house this is by the way… official unofficial party, scheduler, caterer… whatever. Every girls team has one, the girls soccer team, has Lida. She likes to py, what is it. Queen bee, arranging the social activities. Guess it keeps her being some kinda alpha female bullshit."

  "And… we now hang out with all the jocks?"

  "I wondered about that, before I got up here. You guys, fighting practice out in the yard a couple times? You're kinda like athletes to them. The girls? Like it. The boys? You're like one of them. Couple assholes, go figure. If you have any serious problems with the football pyers? I have a man on the inside, he owes me, he loves me. All smoothed over. Remember. The coaches send athletes who have trouble with math and computer csses? To me. These aren't my friends. They? Are o-u-r friends. I assume, I'm just about to hear a round of… thank you, Wiz. You're so wonderful, Wiz. Which brings me to my st thing I need…"

  "Which is?"

  "You know my style. I like to, kind of, ease… into a polite expnation. I don't really go in for, the whole… what we just had in public thing. Guys, we looked like a bunch of bitches. Christ. We're men. We talk about shit at the gym, not scratching each other's eyes out at parties. Come on. Now, be that as it may. Someone here, put you guys up to this. Only someone here, had access to see everything you mentioned. Had to be someone, that was mad, or… had an ax to grind."

  His Army buddy, Lightning's ex… wasn't offering a name up.

  "Dude. Its a bitch. Trying to start shit. Trying to ruin a party. Now, let me see. I have no issues with anyone here. That's guys and girls. In fact, I can only think of one little cunt… that has it in for Lightning… who I'm guessing created this lovely bitch fight we just had."

  "Wasn't a girl. I can't blow a guy doing me a solid in."

  "All I needed to know. You guys? All knew Bubbly. Bubbly? Had a wrestling buddy. Who didn't get hurt and leave. Short ripped guy. Real quiet, real polite. Nice kid. Pimples, or he'd get way better fuck-meat than he's getting. How am I doing."

  "Uh…"

  "Yeah, right. That? Wasn't him. That? Was this short, fat, hairy troll of a cunt he's been reduced to fucking. He's a great guy, and opposites attract. She's only around here, because she's fucking a wrestler. The sports girls? All hate her guts. You guys like this drama that didn't need to be? This, is cunt shit, not guy shit."

  "What are you gonna do?"

  "That's not his phone. Not really. That's his girlfriend's new phone, must just be in his name."

  "What do you think we should…"

  I was hanging around. Eavesdropping. Its my boyfriend after all. I smoothly walked in, and got my arm around him. Light was off, and just now returning with Lida, the self appointed party arranger. Her townhouse, too. I smiled.

  "Couldn't help overhearing, boys. Why don't you boys all have a drink, py in the hot tub… music, ping pong… whatever… let the girls handle the girl stuff, hmm? All except for… you. Please stay. Lida! Hey…"

  The guys filtered out around the party. Lida went over the Barracks Girls Soccer mixer pn. Then, I clued her in, on how this all went on. Who was at fault, most likely. She agreed. Lightning wasn't happy. The hairy little troll failed at her usual shit, so she resorted to making text, pictures and videos… get her ex, his crew, and her new "boyfriend"? All at each other's throats. Publicly. Which would have resulted in about all of us getting an X through our names at future mixers. Now, Lida is pissed.

  Me. Lida. Lightning. And two other girls, that she's been running afoul of tely… all quietly and inauspiciously drifted and got around her and her boyfriend and their little group. We had her surrounded. Lida yelled over to Lightning's ex Army boyfriend.

  "Hit it!"

  Everyone looked around for the few seconds it took for the call to go through. Simple. His job was to simply call or text the phone that had sent him the texts. In the wrestler's name. Thought you should know, bro. You're a cool dude, bro. Texts, pictures, videos. Trying to get trouble brewing.

  Guess who's phone beeped. It wasn't the wrestler.

  Lida expined to the wrestler, how he had been duped. She had used his name on the phone he had bought her, and signed his name to it all. To letting Army boy know "what was going on behind his back". Which it actually wasn't. Any repercussions for starting the brawl? If it even happened, would fall on his shoulders. Not hers. Nice pn, but… Sigma Lightning just struck. She was now facing down something infinitely more scary to her, personally as a girl. A Little Lightning strike.

  "You? Everyone loves you. You're automatically invited to anything. You don't even need to ask. But…"

  We were all looming over, and all around her. Lightning was grinning. Lida was smiling, and it wasn't a nice smile.

  "This… thing? Will never set foot in another mixer. Ever. Its not bad enough she tried to instigate a brawl. Secret pictures and videos and texting. No. She? Used your 900 dolr phone she brags about to anyone unfortunate enough to see her… to make it your problem. You can't be this hard up to get id, you have to put up with shit like this…"

  That was it. He was now pissed. Highly pissed. Lida was about to escort her out and give her the don't ever come around here again speech, when Lightning grabbed a fist full of her hair and started dragging her along behind her, the group of big girls around her. Bitch is lucky she now only faced getting dumped or her leash yanked by the wrestler boyfriend, who had about had his patience stretched to an end. She could just as easily have lost teeth.

  Everything went fairly smoothly after that. The fat hairy troll's special 900 dolr phone? Was found by someone who returned it to Lida. I happened to be standing there, when she got it.

  "This fucking phone. I'm so sick of this phone, and then tonight's shit show…"

  "Lida?"

  "Yeah, Hurry."

  "He bought a second phone. He bought her a 900 dolr phone, and added the number to his pn. While he has a 200 dolr phone for his own. He'll be calling and asking about it, not so much her."

  "Yeah. So?"

  "We know what phone it is, based on where they found it."

  "Okay."

  "When he calls you, to see if it turned up? Suggestion."

  "All right."

  "Don't return it right away. If he hasn't dumped her? Losing the 900 dolr phone, on top of all the shit she caused with it… well… better chance he dumps her ass. Problem solved. Then, you can return it to him after she's gone. You can always return it even if its not… as useful as I'm thinking it might be."

  "Hurry? Good idea. Won't it get found though? Computer, dot on a map."

  "You turn the power off? Yeah. But, if you take the battery out… no."

  "You little stinker. I like that one. I think, whoever found it? Found it with the battery popped off. Huh. Imagine that."

  All's well that ends well. We stayed longer than we thought we would, Wiz thought it was appropriate that he had to hang around with his Army buddies, and I heartily agreed. He smoothed the "entertainment" over to the other party goers. How it happened, how it wasn't actually like it had seemed. With jokes he used to turn it into a big, funny story that got funnier as he went around telling it. Pcing all bme. Start, middle, end? Squarely on the doorstep of the 900 dolr phone whore.