The weather is nice

  Am I in heaven

  No this is the classroom so there's no way this is heaven

  Then was that a dream

  I don't think I would be able to have such a vivid dream

  Then did I possibly go back in time

  If that's true then does that mean that I might have to face that monster again

  I shivered at the thought

  The monster felt terrifying the first time he saw it but it became even more scary once he died

  There's no time to waste

  I should examine my deskmate first to see if he's going to change into a monster

  I turned to see that his head was down

  It looks like there wasn't any major change from the last time

  Then should I try to wake him up

  Maybe the process would stop or something

  I hesitated

  This would require me to go past the boundary I had set for myself

  I don't have the courage to stand up to my classmates or even talk to them

  Not to talk if my bullies

  Normally I wouldn't have the courage to do this

  But the fear of the monster and the pain far exceeded my fear of my deskmate

  I would rather be beaten up or insulted than to face that monster again

  I observed my deskmate some more then gathered the courage required for me to tap him awake

  My heart was beating loudly and my body was tense

  It wasn't totally from the fear of the monster appearing but also partly from interacting with another student

  My hands reached out to the person beside me and I gave him a light pat

  He didn't stir awake or acknowledge me

  I decided to try again a little bit harder this time

  After all; a coward like me would rather not have to deal with it at all

  And my most pressing concern right now is the monster

  I tapped him with a heavier hand as compared to before

  But he still didn't move

  It seems like it's impossible to wake up those who had collapsed

  Then the only other option is to send him to the clinic

  But how do I do that

  I can't carry him to the clinic plus the hallway is full of people roaming about

  Then I have no choice but to inform Mr Yakuza that my deskmate had passed out

  He might not care about me but he won't be able to ignore a student

  Taking a deep breath in; I raised my hand and called his attention

  "Excuse me sir, it seems my deskmate has passed out" I said it in a hurry because everyone in the classroom was staring at me

  And I didn't want to waste the courage I built up when I spoke in class for the first time

  Mr Yakuza paused and stared at me with annoyance before looking over to my deskmate

  "Then take him to the clinic" Mr Yakuza said before continuing his lesson

  It seems he wasn't going to care about it any more than sending him off

  It is mainly due to the fact that my deskmate has the lowest status in class and he doesn't have any friends here

  He does have a few in the other classrooms though

  Now that I have permission; how should I take him to the clinic

  The answer would have been simply to carry him there but there are two problems with that

  First of all; I'm too weak to carry another person

  Second of all; it's not a person but a monster in hibernation

  There's no way I can gather the courage to carry him

  Should I ask for help from someone else

  I doubt that anyone in this school would help me

  It seems there's no other option but to carry him hoping that he doesn't wake up

  I was about to tell the reason I'm still alive

  It's because I'm a coward

  I shifted a bit closer to start the process when he suddenly raised his head up

  It was the same black spot, red eyes and deep growl

  I screamed and fell off my chair

  The monster lunged at me and bit into my neck

  That's how I died the second time

  ...............

  The weather is nice

  Ahhhh

  I screamed as soon as there wasn't blood in my throat

  I'm alive

  "Can you stop interrupting my class" I heard Mr Yakuza say

  Wait am I in the classroom then does that mean....

  I turned my head swiftly to the side and as expected my deskmate was sitting there with his head down

  I screamed and fell off my chair

  The pain and his bloody mouth are still vivid in my head

  How couldn't it be when it just happened a second ago

  Then why am I here again

  Did I come back to life

  But if I did then it wouldn't be at this point but after this

  Then did I go back in time

  Anyway thant doesn't matter right now

  I have to quickly get away from this monster

  "Excuse me sir, may I change seats" I asked the teacher

  "Sit down in your seat and stop disturbing the lesson" Mr Yakuza didn't even bother to acknowledge my question

  "Please sir it's urgent" It's really urgent or I'm going to face a monster

  "Is there anyone willing to sit beside you" Mr Yakuza sneered

  The class snickered at me

  I had forgotten about how much I'm hated in this school

  I doubt there is anyone willing to switch with me

  "Then can someone please help my deskmate to the clinic" I offered instead

  There's no way I'm touching this monster again

  "Then carry him yourself" Mr Yakuza said

  If I do then he would attack me

  "I'm too weak to do it alone and he might die before I get him there" my voice was pleading at this point

  The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

  Mr Yakuza squinted at me debating whether my deskmate was actually that sick

  At the end of the day, he chose a random student to help

  The student glared at me and came to my row to help my deskmate up

  Mr Yakuza stopped paying attention to us after that and continued with his lesson

  The student that came to help told me to help but I refused

  I'm not going to touch this monster again because I'm too scared

  He threatened me but I still refused

  I'd rather be beaten up than to be attacked by a monster

  At the end, he called over his friend to help him

  The friend glared at me and tried to make me do it but I still refused

  They both reluctantly left me alone to carry my deskmate

  Once I saw them get busy I sighed in relief

  Finally the monster is going away

  It's sad though that I couldn't use the opportunity to die

  But I'd rather be killed by somethings less scary

  In my relief; I realized that the other voice in my head was still speaking

  Hmm but I seem to be forgetting something

  It was the reason as to why I'm still alive even though I crave death

  It's because I'm a coward

  Suddenly I was attacked once again

  It was my deskmate that has released himself from those carrying him away and lunged himself at me

  Once again I died

  ...............

  The weather is nice

  Ahhhh

  I screamed once again while choking and crying

  I was back in the classroom after being attacked

  Is it really time travel but why at this specific point

  Why this classroom

  I'm scared

  I don't want to be attacked by that monster again

  "Mr Yakuza can I go to the bathroom" I said in panic

  "Sit down and stop disturbing the class" he ignored me once again

  I stumbled to the front because my legs were shaking and got on my knees

  "Please let me go to the bathroom" I'm scared that if I stay here then I might get attacked again

  "Get out" I guess he was disgusted by my begging and sent me out

  If it was another teacher I'd a student they would have made me beg more while laughing

  I stood up and ran for the door

  The reason as to why I'm still alive

  Finally I'm going to escape from that monster

  I really am a coward

  A body lunged at me as I opened the classroom door

  I was attacked by another student that had turned to a monster

  I died

  ...........

  The weather is nice

  I was back in the classroom once again screaming on my knees on the floor

  This time I vomited bile

  Why was there a monster outside the door

  Too scary

  I have to get out of here

  I have to leave but there are monsters inside and outside the classroom

  Maybe it's because I left too late

  I'm sure it'll be okay now

  I stumbled up from the floor not registering the other people in class

  I went straight to the door and tried to step out

  I really am a coward

  I was attacked and I died

  ...........

  The weather is nice

  AHHHHHH!

  Why am I still here

  Maybe the leaving through the door is the problem

  Then I should try the window

  I stumbled to the classroom window facing the hallway and slid it open

  I really am a coward

  I was attacked by a monster who was beside the window

  .........

  The weather is nice

  AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

  No no no

  Okay the window isn't safe either

  Then what if I tried to open both of them

  I really am a coward

  I died

  ...........

  The weather is nice

  AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

  The hallway is full of monsters then why don't I try the window facing outside school

  The classroom was on the second floor

  I turned to the window beside me and jumped out

  I really am a coward

  As soon as my feet touched the ground

  I was attacked by another monster

  ...........

  The weather is nice

  AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

  This time I screamed for a lot longer

  Then maybe the problem is that I keep coming back to this point in time

  I should try to control it

  I tried my best to activate it but nothing worked

  It seems to only activate once I'm dead

  I really am a coward

  I stood up and took a running position before running straight into the wall making sure my head hit hard

  This amount of pain is nothing and I'm kind of getting numb to pain

  ........

  The weather is nice

  Okay so the switch is instantaneous

  I really am a coward

  So I should try again

  ...........

  The weather is nice

  I couldn't feel anything except dying

  It's like I would blink and then come back to the classroom

  I really am a coward

  But I kept trying

  ...........

  The weather is nice

  Still trying

  I really am a coward

  ........

  The weather is nice

  Still trying

  ........

  The weather is nice

  It's not working

  ..........

  The weather is nice

  I'm scared

  ........

  The weather is nice

  Help me

  ........

  The weather is nice

  Someone save me please

  ........

  The weather is nice

  I screamed let me out until I died

  .......

  The weather is nice

  I sat with my head buried in my knees crying

  I died

  ..........

  The weather is nice

  AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

  I just kept on screaming until I was attacked

  ........

  The weather is nice

  I tried talking to the voice but it didn't respond

  ..........

  The weather is nice

  I tried to die for real

  .........

  The weather is nice

  ..................

  I kept trying different ways to kill myself but none of them worked and it just kept on repeating

  ...................

  If it was in those books with plot power then he might have kept calm and miraculously solved it

  Or he would have broken free of his fear and miraculously escaped

  Or he would have been a genius that discovered a loophole that he could have escaped from

  Or he might have been molded to bean ordinary person that would have gone crazy and started killing all the monsters that caused him that fear

  But unfortunately this is real life

  And in real life, he is a coward

  A coward can't kill something he is afraid of

  And a normal person like him won't suddenly develop courage from this experience

  This is beyond traumatizing, it's insanity

  And one can say his cowardice is also a form of insanity

  After all he could just kill the monsters

  There's really nothing stopping him from trying

  Anyway at this point the only thing he wants is for it to end

  I can't escape from the monsters

  They are everywhere

  I'm trapped in this infinite hell of terror and despair

  He made a desire that arose from every facet of his being

  Though it was now broken and plagued with insanity

  It was still able to make an earnest wish filled with an intense will and desire

  ' if I can't escape then I wish for it to all come to an end'

  'The monsters that killed me'

  'The classroom that cages me'

  'The world that only brought about despair'

  'My existence itself'

  'I wish that everything would come to an end'

  Sadly I'm too much of a coward to do anything

  Hehe

  I agree

  Existence itself is meant to come to an end

  So that existence could be born again

  Then why don't you make a deal with me kid

  There were maniac whispered mixed with the voice

  But somehow I understood what he meant