I can’t believe I’m doing this… why am I doing this… fuck, this water is cold. My feet are kind of adjusting to it now… but fuck… it’s up to my knees now.

  Phoenix: “See, none of them are even focused on us. Everybody is dealing with their own world.”

  She’s right… they are playing some silly game on the stepping stones. Kiyui and Tadwick are jumping across them while Damecus snaps at them from the water. Tadwick is in hysterics. Its sweet to see him laugh like that and fucking hell my balls do not appreciate this temperature of this water… how are they all just splashing in this like it’s nothing?

  Phoenix: “You are clearly not used to bathing in these temperatures.”

  Dwynfel: “Funnily enough… you’re right… its freezing… how are you so calm?”

  Phoenix: “If it was freezing, they would all be dead by now. It’s only slightly colder than your body. You will adjust in time, especially if you move.”

  I’m up to my chest now… my lower half seems to be getting used to it… but this still feels weird. Nice to feel a bit cleaner though… trekking across that wasteland for days had caused me to get sand literally everywhere, which was not comfortable. Phoenix let go of my hand and sat herself down in the water so that the water was up to her shoulders.

  Phoenix: “Cold water can be invigorating. It wakes up the senses and fills your body with energy. Do you not agree?”

  Dwynfel: “Well… I certainly have enough energy to run back to shore and sit by the fire.”

  Phoenix laughed. I have to admit… being naked and surrounded by water… outside… surrounded by all this beauty… it is liberating… and oddly relaxing… despite the cold.

  It is odd seeing Phoenix act so carefree about this stuff as well. I never would have expected this from her. Strange that she is much freer and more relaxed about her body when she is surrounded by non-humans. I mean, Tadwick is human, but he’s a small child and clearly gives zero shits about nudity. Is it being away from humans that has freed her up? Or being away from people that she knows? She has known Kiyui and I for a long time… so maybe not the second one. Maybe it is more to do with where we are.

  This truly is a magical place… even just being here and watching the ripples in the water over there… hang on… why are there ripples in the water over there?

  Dwynfel: “Guys… there’s something in the water!”

  Suddenly the water next to Kiyui erupted and he was dragged off the stepping stone and into the water. Tadwick has a look of absolute shock on his face. What do I do? I can’t go after him… I can’t swim… I’ll just need saving… Damecus is there… surely Damecus will… hang on… suddenly Nomius emerged from the water with Kiyui. Kiyui was laughing as he was placed back on the stepping stone.

  Fucking Nomius… he gave me a fucking heart attack. After placing Kiyui on the stone, Nomius started signing at them… I’m still not great at interpreting his signs but I think he said “look… water… move…” before disappearing again.

  I really am struggling to like that guy. I think it’s the invisibility thing combined with not talking… makes him creepy. I mean… why surprise them like that? Then treat them like idiots for not seeing it coming. Does scaring the shit out of people amuse him or something? He says he came along to protect Tadwick but I really question his motives

  I was cautious never to go anywhere in the water where my feet could not touch the ground. I have no experience of swimming and had no intention of almost drowning and having to be saved by one of those lizardmen.

  Turns out that these really were the perfect people to let my inhibitions go with… not one of them cared or paid any attention to the fact that I was a goblin at all. The lizardmen were more interested in Phoenix’s “battle scars.” She didn’t get the pity from them that she feared. If anything, they held her in much higher regard. Damecus said that “scars are marks of honour” and that “they show you have lived…” which is an interesting perspective.

  Kiyui obviously wasn’t fazed by any of this stuff… and Tadwick… he was just enjoying having a chance to play about. We haven’t really had any chances to play about during our journey here.

  I do have to hand it to Damecus… that paste of his has worked incredibly well… Tadwick is certainly a tad freckled after being out in all this sun, but he hasn’t burned at all… which is good… people with his skin type don’t tend to do so well in the sun and him being burned would definitely have slowed us down.

  The time we all spent together that afternoon was genuinely the happiest I have been in years, despite constantly being on my guard for Nomius appearing out of nowhere. I was playing… just playing… splashing about, jumping across stepping stones and playing silly games. I’ve never done anything like this… not having to worry about accidentally exposing my skin… not having to make excuses… just being able to enjoy myself and be me. This place truly is magical.

  By the time the evening came around, Damecus had cooked various birds as well as a few of those scorpion legs. He had moved various rocks into a circle around the fire so that we could all sit down without getting dirty. He is much more civilised than I really expected from a lizardman. Or at least, that is what I thought, until I saw him eating… both him and Nomius… they devour food at an astonishing rate… tearing, shredding, and biting every last bit of meat off the bones. When we eventually get home, I will need to introduce these two to cutlery.

  I do have to give him credit for the scorpion legs though… they are very nice… they have a nice crunch to them but the inside is oddly sweet and flaky.

  Dwynfel: “What did you use to season these?”

  Damecus: “Nothing much. Just salt, pepper, and lemon juice. Given the presence of the tiny human, I refrained from making things spicy.”

  Kiyui: “Do lizardmen normally like spicy cooking?”

  Nomius: [Signing] “Yes”

  Damecus: “Very much so.”

  Kiyui: “So do I. You’ll have to cook me a proper lizardman dish some time.”

  Damecus: “I doubt you could handle a true dish from our village.”

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  Kiyui stroked Damecus’ leg. He then proceeded to wink at him.

  Kiyui: “Oh, you’d be surprised what I can handle.”

  I nearly choked on my water. That boy is shameless.

  Damecus: “Goblin, are you unwell?”

  After I regained my composure, I nodded and went to take another drink to calm my throat.

  Tadwick: “So how does having two willies work?”

  For fuck’s sake… I nearly choked again.

  Damecus: “Excuse me?”

  Tadwick: “Like, does wee come out of both of them, or one of them, or can you like, pick one?”

  Damecus laughed.

  Damecus: “Urine is expelled from both of them. Unless of course I were to squeeze one really hard. Then it would all come out of the other one.”

  Tadwick: “Would that not make it go all whoosh!!!”

  Tadwick proceed to stand up and fling his hands forward as he continued to make the whooshing noise. My head fell into my hand and I shook it with despair. This child needs to learn some conversational boundaries. Then again… Kiyui is worse for this… why are none of the others bothered by this conversation.

  Damecus: “Pretty much, it would have the force of a ballista.”

  Tadwick: “Really?”

  Kiyui: “He’s kidding with you, Tadpole… right?”

  Damecus looked at Kiyui and grinned. He then started to devour another one of the birds that he had cooked.

  Tadwick: “And why do the lady lizards not have boobs?”

  Please do not let this question lead to another unfortunate mime.

  Damecus: “Our young are born capable of eating solid food. There is no need to breastfeed, therefore our females lack mammary glands.”

  Tadwick: “What are mammy gands?”

  Kiyui: “Boobs, Tadpole.”

  Tadwick: “Oh… you can feed from boobs?”

  I forgot… he was raised in an orphanage outside of the city. He’s probably never seen anybody breastfeed before.

  Kiyui: “When human babies are born, they can’t eat solid food. So, their mothers’ bodies produce milk which the baby can suck out of the mother’s breasts.”

  Tadwick: “Oh…”

  The cogs were turning in Tadwick’s head. He was processing what he had just learned. Then he turned to Phoenix.

  Tadwick: “Phoenix, I’ve not had any milk in forever. Can I have some of yours in the morning?”

  Phoenix glared at him… and I nearly choked to death on a piece of scorpion meat. Never mind the deathstalkers, this conversation is going to kill me.

  Phoenix: “No.”

  Tadwick: “Why not?”

  Kiyui: “Human females don’t produce milk until they have given birth. No point producing it if you don’t have a baby to feed.”

  Tadwick: “Oh…”

  He turned to Phoenix again.

  Tadwick: “If you had had a baby, then could I have some?”

  Nomius was struggling to keep a straight face at that question and decided to try to hide this by ramming the last scorpion leg into his mouth. Damecus was smirking and Kiyui giggled. Phoenix on the other hand… she looked as if she was about to set fire to all of us.

  Phoenix: “Absolutely not.”

  Tadwick: “Why?”

  Dwynfel: “Because you are too old Tadwick. Big boys don’t suck on breasts.”

  Kiyui: “Well, actually…”

  Dwynfel: “Don’t you dare.”

  The group fell silent for a while after that exchange. I mean… what the hell do you follow that with? Eventually, Nomius decided to attempt conversation.

  Nomius: [Signing] “Doing… what… get… home?”

  Phoenix: “Hopefully getting a reward for rescuing that idiot woman.”

  Dwynfel: “You barely even spoke to her… she seemed reasonable to me.”

  Phoenix glared at me.

  Kiyui: “Well, we need to make sure we kill that incubus before it becomes a problem.”

  Damecus: “Easier said than done.”

  Kiyui: “Maybe if we surprise it.”

  Damecus: “It will find you before you find it.”

  Kiyui: “How?”

  Nomius: [Signing] “Boy… marked…”

  Damecus: “It can sense the mark.”

  Dwynfel: “So basically, we keep him safe and wait for it to come to us.”

  Damecus: “You are probably safer over here. You will have time to prepare.”

  Tadwick: “I don’t wanna stay here. I wanna find mister Danes.”

  Dwynfel: “Who?”

  Tadwick: “Mr Danes. He always looked out for me. He always slipped me a woobarb and custer when I was upset.”

  Oh gods… he doesn’t know… he hasn’t realised. He thinks he’s just returning to the life he had before.

  Kiyui: “Oh Tadpole, honey, you won’t be able to see Mr Danes again.”

  Tadwick: “Why?”

  Damecus: “The people you knew are dead.”

  Dwynfel: “Damecus!”

  Damecus: “The tiny human needs to know. You told me what his home was like when you found it. He was going to find out sooner or later.”

  Dwynfel: “There is such a thing as being subtle.”

  Damecus: “Subtlety accomplishes nothing other than confusion. He must know the severity of his situation.”

  Tadwick began crying. But not the way that he usually cries when he’s hurt himself… it wasn’t loud crying… he wasn’t thrashing or screaming. Just… sort of… a low-level whimper.

  Dwynfel: “You’ve made him cry now.”

  Damecus: “Crying is cathartic. Emotion is healthy.”

  Nomius: [Signing] “Cry… help… move… forward.”

  Phoenix: “They are correct you know.”

  What the fuck is with these lizardmen? I thought they were all meant to be like… Arrrghh… growling and anger. Seriously… these guys are confusing me beyond belief.

  Kiyui walked over to Tadwick, picked him up and placed him on his knee. Tadwick cuddled into Kiyui’s chest and continued to sob.

  Kiyui: “We’re all here for you, honey. Anything you need.”

  I could see Tadwick’s little hands gripping at Kiyui’s arms. Poor thing… I wish I knew how to help him. Honestly, this has been far from what I was expecting from today. As the evening progressed Tadwick eventually fell asleep in Kiyui’s arms. Kiyui carried him into the smaller of the two tents. As he did, I heard him humming that sweet tune that he had played to me back when my arms were broken… maybe it’s a lullaby of some description… it was certainly soothing and hypnotic enough.

  Kiyui, Tadwick, Phoenix and I have been sleeping in the smaller tent and the lizardmen have been sleeping in the larger tent. Nomius is always very good at setting up various traps that alert us if anything comes in proximity of the camp. We haven’t actually had anything attack us in the night yet… although the alarm was set off by a weasel looking thing once… which Nomius was pleased with… as naturally he caught it and ate it later. That guy is a hazard to the ecosystem of any area he travels through.

  Dwynfel: “I suppose we should head off too.”

  Damecus: “A sound suggestion. We have a lot of ground to cover tomorrow. It would be wise to be well rested.”

  I stood up and headed towards our tent.

  Phoenix: “You go ahead. I’m not sleeping in that child’s tent anymore. I’m way too tall and you three give off way too much heat. I will go in with the lizardmen.”

  Dwynfel: “Wait… what?”

  She walked over to the big tent. She turned to me looked me dead in the eye and smiled.

  Phoenix: “Talk to him.”