Isabelle stared again at the pale, white gibberish lettering that was once her system visualizing her sole magic script, 'fuck this shit.'
[Error: No magic script named 'fuck this shit' found in system]
[Would you like to write one now?]
[Y/N]
Isabelle wanted to, but now wasn't the time. It just wasn't the time at all, she thought.
[Error: No magic script named 'now isn't the time' found in system]
[Would you like to write one now?]
[Y/N]
Isabelle rolled her eyes and thought no. She looked again at her corrupted magic script.
[**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**]
And then, everything changed. At first, it was hard for Isabelle to figure out just what was happening, but when she did, it struck her all at once like a slap to the face.
[...]
[...]
[Nerfing process init]
[...]
[...]
[Executing nerf search]
[~!?]
[...]
[...]
[B]
[---]
[D]
[...]
Isabelle didn't know what the fuckedy fuck was happening, but she was annoyed as shit about it. She was absolutely furious that she was about to be nerfed! That shit wasn't fair! and for what? Standing up to the Spire's bullshit? Was the world of Beaubinte itself destined to turn against her? It seemed like ever since she left Thres, every location she entered had a personal vendetta against her. Maybe things were better back in Thres.
Maybe.
But Isabelle wasn't able to ignore the present by drifting through the past forever, although she'd managed to distract herself momentarily. Still, now was no longer the time for such things. Isabelle had been presented with yet another boolean from her system.
[Nerfable properties identified]
[Would you like to see a list?]
[Y/N]
Isabelle was so fucking confused. Like, what the actual fuck did this mean?
[Clarification: The Spire has interfaced and locked your system into nerf mode. You're unable to leave this mode until you accept to nerfing or unless the passive systemic feedback loop is broken, which is nearly entirely out of your control. That being said, you as a 'player' have the 'agency' to choose whether you are nerfed or not. Furthermore and alongside of this, there is the fact of the matter that ultimately you are able to decide what, if anything, the Spire's nerf call removes from your system. As stated previously, if you choose to be so thoroughly nerfed, it would also automatically reset and repair a number of system aspects and inflammation that may be affecting your experience as a player.]
Isabelle thought about this. She remembered what it had been like to use her system before the corruption, before the bullshit, before the parasites got her down. What the fuckedy fuck had even happened? Everyone in Thres had always been at her throat, and after the fucking cultists and Overqueens tried to excise her fucking mana from her permanently, Isabelle had been ridden with a buggy experience. Sure, her system had always had quirks, but Isabelle was so fucking furious at how useless it had been recently. When was the last fucking time she'd leveled up, for instance?
[Clarification: You have been consistently engaged in fights with enemies in combat mode for an extended period of time, including from your time in Chox all up until now at the Clockwork Spire. This part of your system is still operational.]
Isabelle rolled her eyes. Damned system snark never let up, did it?
[Clarification: No.]
What a cunt.
[Error: No system command 'What a cunt' found in system.]
[Would you like to write magic script named 'What a cunt' now?]
[Y/N]
Isabelle sighed and thought no. Classic.
[Nerfable properties identified]
[Would you like to see a list?]
[Y/N]
Ah, yes. Back to this bullshit again. It was all Isabelle could do to sigh and roll her eyes.
Well, also, she needed to decide. Isabelle figured seeing the list wouldn't necessarily commit her entirely to actually getting nerfed. Right?
Of course, this time, her system was silent. Isabelle must've failed a passive wis+int check; but she couldn't let that get her down.
So Isabelle decided. Isabelle decided to think yes, and then Isabelle thought yes. Fuck all these system bugs.
Nerfable Properties:
Shadow magic
[**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**]
Notice: Focus on a nerfable property to learn about what you would lose.
Well, that was a short list as Isabelle had ever seen. The Spire must've only considered a few of her abilities nerf-worthy. It was a little insulting, almost, she considered. After all, Isabelle was way overpowered. Wasn't she? WASN'T SHE?
No answer. Another silent system moment. How frustrating. Still, Isabelle needed to focus. She decided it was worth learning more about each of her 'nerfable properties' and how accepting a 'nerfing' might affect her overall power levels.
Isabelle focused on shadow magic first. She was a fucking mage of shadows, wasn't she? WASN'T SHE?
Property: Shadow magic
Description: The entirety of shadow magic will be removed if you accept this nerf. You will have no ability to use shadow magic at all, or its magic 2.0 system properties that allow for intuitive access to additional experimentation and implementation of casting spells.
Proceed with nerf?
Y/N
Isabelle sighed and rolled her eyes. Fucking really? There was no way in hell she was going to accept that, that was a fucking horrible property to accept a nerfing for. If the other option was just as bad, well, Isabelle would just find a way around the whole damned thing. She always did, and Isabelle knew that if she really tried, she could.
But Isabelle also wanted to see if she could piggyback off this fucked up nerf event and use it to fix her corrupted system. She'd been thrown into Beaubinte without a tutorial, so really, in a way Isabelle had never had a fully operational system. The way it was talking now, it really seemed likely to her that if she could stick this out, play by whatever the hell the nerfing rules were, then Isabelle could feasibly come out the other end of this fuckery with more abilities than she'd ever had before, not fucking less.
Isabelle would never, ever settle for less. No matter what Beaubinte tried to throw at her.
Proceed with nerf?
Y/N
Isabelle thought no. She still needed to look at the fucking second nerfable property! Isabelle went back to the nerfable property window by focusing her mind on it.
Nerfable Properties:
Shadow magic
[**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**]
Notice: Focus on a nerfable property to learn about what you would lose.
Isabelle focused on [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] to learn more about it.
Property: [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**]
Description: [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] is a magic script that you wrote. [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] performs actions that you defined in magic script as '3@@@!!53&'.
Proceed with nerf?
Y/N
Wait a fuckedy fucking second. Isabelle looked at it again.
Property: [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**]
Description: [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] is a magic script that you wrote. [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] performs actions that you defined in magic script as '3@@@!!53&'.
Proceed with nerf?
Y/N
Was Isabelle's system telling her that in order for her to be nerfed, she just had to remove [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] from her system? [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**], the extremely simple magic script that she had written moments before that had managed to corrupt countless other aspects of the world of Beaubinte, getting her out of all sorts of trouble while also allowing her safety from the mana removal attempts enemies made against her? The magic script that was now so horribly corrupted itself due to a mistake made in the heat of the moment that rendered it otherwise unusable?
[Clarification: [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] is not at all unusable. To the contrary, the magic script [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] has the ability to end the entire world if ever run, by creating an endless feedback loop of ever growing world-corruption the density of which would increase exponentially, instantly consuming the entire world of Beaubinte in an instant.]
Isabelle sighed and rolled her eyes. Of course she ended up accidentally creating a doomsday protocol in her system. Well, it was nice to know that she was capable of such things already. Good for herself, Isabelle figured.
It was time to end this bullshit, though. Isabelle knew that if she was smart enough to accidentally create a world ending script, then Isabelle also knew she would be able to write another magic script to replace the original 'fuck this shit' script, anyway, if she really needed it. Which meant, overall, this was a great deal.
Hell. Isabelle even knew how to make another world-ender, if she really wanted to. Maybe she would. Just for insurance, though. Like a nuke. A nuke in her system. Isabelle liked the idea of that.
Proceed with nerf?
Y/N
Oh, that was right. Isabelle still needed to decide, formally or otherwise, just what in the fresh hell she was really going to do.
And she knew. Oh, did Isabelle know.
Proceed with nerf?
Y/N
Isabelle thought yes. She was ready for the ride. It was all she could do to keep from smirking, she almost felt that she was getting away with something.
[Nerf init]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[Processing]
[...]
[...]
[Ingesting]
[...]
[Digesting]
[...]
[Gestating]
[...]
[To proceed with nerf, you must first accept reset to system]
[Do you accept system reset?]
Ah, Isabelle had forgotten about this. She'd have to allow it to reset her system and restore it to pure functionality. But, since Isabelle wasn't giving up shadow magic, that actually sounded optimal.
Wait a fuckedy fucking second. Isabelle wouldn't lose her shadow magic if she reset her system, would she?
[Clarification: No.]
Well, that was a relief.
Wait a fuckedy fucking second. Isabelle wouldn't lose her ability to write magic script if she reset her system, would she?
[Clarification: No.]
Well, that was a relief.
Wait a fuckedy fucking second. Isabelle wouldn't lose her ability to do something else she hadn't thought of if she reset her system, would she?
[Clarification: No.]
Isabelle thought yes.
[...]
[System reset complete]
That was fast.
[...]
[Clearing system settings]
[...]
[Clearing unconfigured system tags]
[...]
[Setting to base]
[...]
[Clearing]
[...]
[Completed]
[System reset to standard operation successfully]
[...]
[Proceed with nerf?]
[Y/N]
Well, that was it.
Wait, that was it? Isabelle didn't even have to go through with the fucking nerf?
[Clarification: Yes, you do. Thinking no will only result in a flow of system prompts to proceed with nerf while being completely unable to do anything. The time to exit the prompt is over.]
That... was what Isabelle had been expecting, for better or worse. Still, she had to check! Just in case. But the Spire, and as a result her system, were not that malleable. Not by her, at least not at this present moment.
[Proceed with nerf?]
[Y/N]
Isabelle thought yes.
[Nerfing you]
[...]
[...]
Isabelle's mouth would've gone wide if she'd had the strength to as it seemed a long, needley appendage from the Spire itself bent down like an enormous scorpion stinger and stabbed the pentagon that contained her. In a moment, Isabelle felt woozy, tired, exhausted even, and nauseous as all fuck. Then, as suddenly as it came on, it passed, and the scorpion's stinger yanked out of the pentagon and raised up, up into the foggy distant air above her.
If you encounter this story on Amazon, note that it's taken without permission from the author. Report it.
[...]
[Magic script [**&%^^^&&&%$##$%#$%#^#^^&&%&%&**] deleted from system]
[...]
[Nerfing complete]
In a flash, Isabelle watched as the pentagon dissolved into a thin screen of nothingness and then dissolved entirely. She was standing before her shocked party members as well as five sinister looking Oglo replicants.
"HAH!" said Isabelle. "I'm so fucking ready."
"Isabelle!" said Tahsi Junior. "Are you okay? That looked super fucked up."
"My son!" said Tahsi Senior as he inhaled a cheese danish.
"I'm more than okay, Tahsi Junior," said Isabelle. "Way more than okay. Why don't you check your inventory? In fact, everyone in my party should check their fucking inventory right the fuckedy fuck now." She didn't admit it to herself, but this was Isabelle's way of making distance from disappointment. If what she had tried hadn't truly worked the way she'd thought, well, much better for her party to find out first than her.
"Holy fucking gods," said Tahsi Junior. "My inventory works again!"
"My son!" said Tahsi Senior as he munched on two other danishes. "Although I see that my inventory, too, is working again!"
"You nerds check your inventories a lot," said Ignis as she huffed with her long, dragon snout. "Then again, mine's working, too. That's nice."
"What the fuck is going on?" said Oglo 2. "Like, seriously, why do you all seem so fucking excited?"
Isabelle turned around 360 degrees, sighed and rolled her eyes, and then turned 180 degrees to look at all the Oglos. "Get ready to go to fucking hell, you tanktop wearing bitch faces."
"Bitch faces?" said Oglo 4, sounding hurt.
Isabelle was ready to fuck shit up. Seriously. And things were feeling better than ever. But to confirm it wasn't all just her imagination, all just placebo, Isabelle was going to have to do something she hadn't been able to do in earnest in a long time.
Isabelle opened her inventory.
Inventory: Isabelle
Carrying capacity: 355.4/525
Bottle of Shiach Ashes
+1 carry weight
Frying pan (imbued)
+2 str, +1 const, +3 carry weight
Silver Mace (imbued)
+3 str, +1 const, +3 carry weight
Catnip (enchanted)
+1 carry weight
Choxian Scroll
+0.5 carry weight
Red Serpent Armor (kobold)
+5 damage, +2 str, +10 carry weight
Red Serpent Helmet (kobold)
+3 str, +1 char, +5 carry weight
Jetpack of the Red Serpent
+5 const, +10 carry weight
Mysterious letter
+0.5 carry weight
Crumpled Letter
+0.5 carrying capacity
Potion of Minor Health
+0.5 carrying capacity
Potion of Middling Health
+0.5 carrying capacity
Potion of Strength
+0.5 carrying capacity
Ring of Choxianism
+2 char, +0.5 carrying capacity
Potion of Major Stamina
+0.5 carrying capacity
Red Serpent Necklace
+0.5 carrying capacity
Incense of Insensitivity
+69 str, +0.5 carry weight
Cloak of Confusingness
+20 confuse, +3 carry weight
Brass Candelabra of Stretching
+25 const, +1 carry weight
Potion of Giant Floating Brain Intellect
+100 int, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Sultry Vapors
+100 char, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Weakness
-150 str, +0.5 carry weight
Horn of Iness
n/a
Elven Drip Beads
+25 dx, +1 carry weight
Sapphire
n/a
Garnet
n/a
Amethyst x2
n/a
Sleek Adult Golden Dragon Armor (human)
+5 fire resist, +17 hp, +19 str, +14 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Boots
+3 fire resist, +7 stm, +6 dx, +3 str, +9 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Gauntlets
+3 fire resist, +8 damage, +6 stm, +10 dx, +5 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Cloak
+7 fire resist, +6 char, +6 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Hooksword x2
+3 fire damage, +8 damage, +5 stm, +3 dx, +4 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Rapier
+5 fire damage, +9 damage, +3 str, +6 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Claymore
+6 fire damage, +12 damage, +7 str, +10 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Bow
+5 fire damage, +4 damage, +5 dx, +3 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Helmet
+12 str, +8 char, +5 speechcraft, +4 carry weight
Overlord’s Flaming Yellow Katana
+48 damage, +22 str, +37 dx, +11 stm, +10 carry weight
Overlord’s Black Silver Hammer (enchanted)
+50 damage, +50 str, +10 const, +8 stm, +13 carry weight
Overlord's Glorious Electrifying Axe (enchanted)
+45 damage, +48 str, +18 const, +15 stm, +12 carry weight
Steel Warhammer of Electrocution (enchanted) (poisoned)
+18 damage, +11 str, +8 const, +5 stm, +11 carry weight
Velithar Gears x4
+4 carry weight
Scimitar (poisoned)
+1 poison, +8 damage, +2 dx
Overlord’s Sending Stone
+1 carry weight
Poisoning Dagger x2
+1 poison, +6 damage, +1 sneak level, +1 carry weight
Black Steel Armor (yuan-ti)
+3 str, +2 damage, +1 const, +10 carry weight
Ropes of Binding (enchanted)
+1 carry weight
Steel Mace
+10 damage, +1 str, +4 carry weight
Mithril Ascot
+15 str, +10 const, +0.5 carry weight
Platinum Choaker Necklace
+8 char
Spun Silk Gloves
+5 char, +0.5 carry weight
Ruby Studded Pocket Knife
+1 stealth, +3 sneak, +0.5 carry weight
Staff of Paralyzation
+5 mana, +4 carry weight
Steel Armor (velithar)
+5 damage, +10 str, +5 const, +10 carry weight
Amulet of Fire Resist
+10 fire resist, +0.5 carry weight
Ring of Hoarding
+50 carrying capacity
Young Red Dragon Scale Pendant
+10 char
Sleek Young Red Dragon Armor (human)
+3 fire resist, +7 hp, +12 str, +13 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Boots
+2 fire resist, +4 stm, +4 dx, +2 str, +7 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Gauntlets
+2 fire resist, +5 damage, +5 stm, +5 dx, +4 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Cloak
+5 fire resist, +3 char, +3 stm, +5 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Dagger x2
+2 fire damage, +5 damage, +3 stm, +1 dx, +2 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Glaive
+2 fire damage, +7 damage, +2 str, +6 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Bow
+3 fire damage, +2 damage, +3 dx, +3 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Helmet
+7 str, +5 char, +3 speechcraft, +3 carry weight
Potion of Mind Reading
+0.5 carry weight
Hunter’s Crossbow of Chills (enchanted)
+3 frost damage, +7 damage, +2 dx, +4 carry weight
Arrows of Chills x27 (enchanted)
+2 frost damage, +1 damage
Necromancer Robes
+10 mana, +3 confuse, +3 enchant, +1 destroy, +4 carry weight
Ring of Improved Destroy
+3 destroy
Staff of the Undead
+5 mana, +2 carry weight
Amulet of Lesser Confusion
+3 confuse
Ring of Increased Mana
+5 mana
Flask of Whiskey
n/a
Shrouded Cowl
+1 sneak level, +1.5 carry weight
Poisoning Dagger x2
+1 poison, +6 damage, +1 sneak level, +1 carry weight
Letter from the SNS
n/a
Steel Longsword
+5 str, +5 damage, +8 carry eight
Cloud Reach Guard Shield
+3 str, +3 const, +10 carry weight
Cloud Reach Guard Helmet (human)
+2 hp, +1 str, +4.5 carry weight
Cloud Reach Guard Armor (human)
+3 hp, +4 str, +8 carry weight
Capenter’s Guild Ring
+5 crafting
Noble Robes
+6 char, +2 carry weight
Noble Boots
+4 dx, +4 carry weight
Necklace of Greater Speechcraft
+10 speechcraft, +0.5 carry weight
Map of Prison grounds
+0.5 carry weight
Steel Gloves
+1 str, +3 damage, +1 carry weight
Orcish Longbow
+5 damage, +1 dx, +1.5 carry weight
Spell Tome of Minor Destroying Magic
+5 carry weight
Spell Tome of Intermediate Destroying Magic
+5 carry weight
Spell Tome of Minor Enchanting Magic
+5 carry weight
Spell Tome of Minor Healing Magic
+5 carry weight
Idlungie x2
+0.5 carry weight
Butter Tongue x5
+1 hp, +0.5 carry weight
Toadblossom x30
+0.1 carry weight
Daggerbud Berries x17
+3 poison, +2 stun, +0.1 carry weight
Giant Spider Armor (human)
+4 hp, +8 str, +13 carry weight
Giant Spider Gauntlets
+4 damage, +3 stm, +1 dx, +3 carry weight
Giant Spider Boots
+4 stm, +2 str, +1 dx, +5 carry weight
Gold nail coverings
+5 damage, +3 dx, +0.5 carry weight
Golden boots
+1 str, +3 carry weight
Potion of Endless Stamina x2
+0.5 carry weight
Potion of Greater Health x2
+20 hp, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Greater Mana x3
+20 mana, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Greater Health x3
+20 hp, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Invulnerability
+0.5 carry weight
Potion of Excellent Health x3
+50 hp, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Giant Strength
+50 str, +0.5 carry weight
Necklace of Clam Husbandry
+0.5 carry weight
Dragon Scroll x3
n/a
Gold-lined dragon pillows
n/a
Gold-framed painting by artist known only to the dragon
n/a
Golden pitcher
n/a
Golden necklace x4
n/a
Amethyst x5
n/a
Garnet x3
n/a
Lapiz lazuli x2
n/a
Small gold idol
n/a
Golden chalice set
n/a
Banded agate
n/a
Hematite x4
n/a
Azurite x3
n/a
Blue quartz x2
n/a
Emerald x2
n/a
Palace Dungeon Door Key
n/a
Poison Pills
+5 poison
Gate Key
n/a
Bobby Pin x10
n/a
Copper (699)
Silver (7235)
Gold (307003)
Fuck yea, bitch. She was fucking thrilled! Isabelle could've kissed her inventory, hell, she could've kissed her system. She was so, so fucking glad she hadn't lost all her loot. All that hard work. Thank fucking god she hadn't just lost it all, permanently, to corruption. Somehow, it seemed, Isabelle had taken a nerf event and turned it into the exact opposite. The Spire hadn't nerfed her. It had FREED her. Isabelle's system was no longer broken. If only she still had fucking Stelas, her severed head holding, and all his crazy loot. He was chock full of heavy dragon parts that were awesome for crafting, wasn't he? Of course, Isabelle still had her severed thumb of holding from that dead cannibal corpse, but like, gross. Isabelle much preferred having a severed head of holding that whined and bitched at her for adding things to his inventory. There was something just so comically pitiful about the whole thing. Still, Isabelle sure did love having her inventory back. She couldn't fucking wait to look at it, over and over and over again, as much as she possibly fucking could. In fact, she did once more, right then and there.
Inventory: Isabelle
Carrying capacity: 355.4/525
Bottle of Shiach Ashes
+1 carry weight
Frying pan (imbued)
+2 str, +1 const, +3 carry weight
Silver Mace (imbued)
+3 str, +1 const, +3 carry weight
Catnip (enchanted)
+1 carry weight
Choxian Scroll
+0.5 carry weight
Red Serpent Armor (kobold)
+5 damage, +2 str, +10 carry weight
Red Serpent Helmet (kobold)
+3 str, +1 char, +5 carry weight
Jetpack of the Red Serpent
+5 const, +10 carry weight
Mysterious letter
+0.5 carry weight
Crumpled Letter
+0.5 carrying capacity
Potion of Minor Health
+0.5 carrying capacity
Potion of Middling Health
+0.5 carrying capacity
Potion of Strength
+0.5 carrying capacity
Ring of Choxianism
+2 char, +0.5 carrying capacity
Potion of Major Stamina
+0.5 carrying capacity
Red Serpent Necklace
+0.5 carrying capacity
Incense of Insensitivity
+69 str, +0.5 carry weight
Cloak of Confusingness
+20 confuse, +3 carry weight
Brass Candelabra of Stretching
+25 const, +1 carry weight
Potion of Giant Floating Brain Intellect
+100 int, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Sultry Vapors
+100 char, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Weakness
-150 str, +0.5 carry weight
Horn of Iness
n/a
Elven Drip Beads
+25 dx, +1 carry weight
Sapphire
n/a
Garnet
n/a
Amethyst x2
n/a
Sleek Adult Golden Dragon Armor (human)
+5 fire resist, +17 hp, +19 str, +14 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Boots
+3 fire resist, +7 stm, +6 dx, +3 str, +9 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Gauntlets
+3 fire resist, +8 damage, +6 stm, +10 dx, +5 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Cloak
+7 fire resist, +6 char, +6 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Hooksword x2
+3 fire damage, +8 damage, +5 stm, +3 dx, +4 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Rapier
+5 fire damage, +9 damage, +3 str, +6 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Claymore
+6 fire damage, +12 damage, +7 str, +10 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Bow
+5 fire damage, +4 damage, +5 dx, +3 carry weight
Adult Golden Dragon Helmet
+12 str, +8 char, +5 speechcraft, +4 carry weight
Overlord’s Flaming Yellow Katana
+48 damage, +22 str, +37 dx, +11 stm, +10 carry weight
Overlord’s Black Silver Hammer (enchanted)
+50 damage, +50 str, +10 const, +8 stm, +13 carry weight
Overlord's Glorious Electrifying Axe (enchanted)
+45 damage, +48 str, +18 const, +15 stm, +12 carry weight
Steel Warhammer of Electrocution (enchanted) (poisoned)
+18 damage, +11 str, +8 const, +5 stm, +11 carry weight
Velithar Gears x4
+4 carry weight
Scimitar (poisoned)
+1 poison, +8 damage, +2 dx
Overlord’s Sending Stone
+1 carry weight
Poisoning Dagger x2
+1 poison, +6 damage, +1 sneak level, +1 carry weight
Black Steel Armor (yuan-ti)
+3 str, +2 damage, +1 const, +10 carry weight
Ropes of Binding (enchanted)
+1 carry weight
Steel Mace
+10 damage, +1 str, +4 carry weight
Mithril Ascot
+15 str, +10 const, +0.5 carry weight
Platinum Choaker Necklace
+8 char
Spun Silk Gloves
+5 char, +0.5 carry weight
Ruby Studded Pocket Knife
+1 stealth, +3 sneak, +0.5 carry weight
Staff of Paralyzation
+5 mana, +4 carry weight
Steel Armor (velithar)
+5 damage, +10 str, +5 const, +10 carry weight
Amulet of Fire Resist
+10 fire resist, +0.5 carry weight
Ring of Hoarding
+50 carrying capacity
Young Red Dragon Scale Pendant
+10 char
Sleek Young Red Dragon Armor (human)
+3 fire resist, +7 hp, +12 str, +13 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Boots
+2 fire resist, +4 stm, +4 dx, +2 str, +7 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Gauntlets
+2 fire resist, +5 damage, +5 stm, +5 dx, +4 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Cloak
+5 fire resist, +3 char, +3 stm, +5 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Dagger x2
+2 fire damage, +5 damage, +3 stm, +1 dx, +2 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Glaive
+2 fire damage, +7 damage, +2 str, +6 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Bow
+3 fire damage, +2 damage, +3 dx, +3 carry weight
Young Red Dragon Helmet
+7 str, +5 char, +3 speechcraft, +3 carry weight
Potion of Mind Reading
+0.5 carry weight
Hunter’s Crossbow of Chills (enchanted)
+3 frost damage, +7 damage, +2 dx, +4 carry weight
Arrows of Chills x27 (enchanted)
+2 frost damage, +1 damage
Necromancer Robes
+10 mana, +3 confuse, +3 enchant, +1 destroy, +4 carry weight
Ring of Improved Destroy
+3 destroy
Staff of the Undead
+5 mana, +2 carry weight
Amulet of Lesser Confusion
+3 confuse
Ring of Increased Mana
+5 mana
Flask of Whiskey
n/a
Shrouded Cowl
+1 sneak level, +1.5 carry weight
Poisoning Dagger x2
+1 poison, +6 damage, +1 sneak level, +1 carry weight
Letter from the SNS
n/a
Steel Longsword
+5 str, +5 damage, +8 carry eight
Cloud Reach Guard Shield
+3 str, +3 const, +10 carry weight
Cloud Reach Guard Helmet (human)
+2 hp, +1 str, +4.5 carry weight
Cloud Reach Guard Armor (human)
+3 hp, +4 str, +8 carry weight
Capenter’s Guild Ring
+5 crafting
Noble Robes
+6 char, +2 carry weight
Noble Boots
+4 dx, +4 carry weight
Necklace of Greater Speechcraft
+10 speechcraft, +0.5 carry weight
Map of Prison grounds
+0.5 carry weight
Steel Gloves
+1 str, +3 damage, +1 carry weight
Orcish Longbow
+5 damage, +1 dx, +1.5 carry weight
Spell Tome of Minor Destroying Magic
+5 carry weight
Spell Tome of Intermediate Destroying Magic
+5 carry weight
Spell Tome of Minor Enchanting Magic
+5 carry weight
Spell Tome of Minor Healing Magic
+5 carry weight
Idlungie x2
+0.5 carry weight
Butter Tongue x5
+1 hp, +0.5 carry weight
Toadblossom x30
+0.1 carry weight
Daggerbud Berries x17
+3 poison, +2 stun, +0.1 carry weight
Giant Spider Armor (human)
+4 hp, +8 str, +13 carry weight
Giant Spider Gauntlets
+4 damage, +3 stm, +1 dx, +3 carry weight
Giant Spider Boots
+4 stm, +2 str, +1 dx, +5 carry weight
Gold nail coverings
+5 damage, +3 dx, +0.5 carry weight
Golden boots
+1 str, +3 carry weight
Potion of Endless Stamina x2
+0.5 carry weight
Potion of Greater Health x2
+20 hp, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Greater Mana x3
+20 mana, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Greater Health x3
+20 hp, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Invulnerability
+0.5 carry weight
Potion of Excellent Health x3
+50 hp, +0.5 carry weight
Potion of Giant Strength
+50 str, +0.5 carry weight
Necklace of Clam Husbandry
+0.5 carry weight
Dragon Scroll x3
n/a
Gold-lined dragon pillows
n/a
Gold-framed painting by artist known only to the dragon
n/a
Golden pitcher
n/a
Golden necklace x4
n/a
Amethyst x5
n/a
Garnet x3
n/a
Lapiz lazuli x2
n/a
Small gold idol
n/a
Golden chalice set
n/a
Banded agate
n/a
Hematite x4
n/a
Azurite x3
n/a
Blue quartz x2
n/a
Emerald x2
n/a
Palace Dungeon Door Key
n/a
Poison Pills
+5 poison
Gate Key
n/a
Bobby Pin x10
n/a
Copper (699)
Silver (7235)
Gold (307003)
Only, damn. That was a fucking enormous inventory Isabelle had to look over. Even when her inventory got abbreviated, it felt a little inconvenient to her to have to look at it while fighting!
[Clarification: You now have enabled quick item switching during combat mode. you may intuitively equip items without directly looking at your inventory using system commands. You may configure this ability further outside of combat mode.]
Wait, what? Isabelle had to try it. Instead of opening her glorious inventory, as much as she loved and cherished it, Isabelle thought about equipping one of those badass weapons she'd taken from the Overlord.
[Overlord’s Black Silver Hammer (enchanted) equipped]
[+50 damage]
[+50 str]
[+10 const]
[+8 stm]
[+13 carry weight]
Isabelle cackled as the power coursed through her veins from the immediate stat boost.
"Holy fucking shit," said Tahsi Junior. "She fucking did it. She fixed her inventory."
"My son!" said Tahsi Senior as he ate four biscuits in rapid succession, spewing crumbs like a fountain. "It's true though, super fucking cool too. Isabelle is such a fucking badass. If I were wearing pants, I'd be pissing them."
"No need to be crass," said Ignis with a deep huff. "It is impressive, though. She almost seems like a real mage of shadows, now."
"That's because I fucking am!" said Isabelle. She laughed again and raised the silver hammer in the air.
"She finally fucking admits it," said Tahsi Junior under his breath.
"My son," said Tahsi Senior under his breath as he snuck another biscuit into his cheek.
"Alright, bitches!" said Isabelle with a sigh. She looked at the five Oglo replicants, who were silent in shock. "Put your dukes up! It's fucking hammer time!"
