Penelope stayed behind to talk to Cirdor.

  It had been another day of sharing the brewing station and only participating in a third of the steps. While the others were at the cusp of level ten, Penelope’s group was nearing the end of level seven. The others would be done the next day, which was what Penelope wanted to talk to Cirdor about.

  She knocked on the door to his office, then stepped into the doorway.

  The orange Elf was buried behind a stack of papers. Dark circles ringed his eyes and the brightness in the yellow was visibly dulled. He didn’t look up from the paper he was reading. “What do you want?”

  “I wanted to see about getting some extra time in the lab.” Penelope took slow, shallow breaths through her mouth to keep the musky smell of the room away from her nose. “Have you been living here?”

  Anger burned in his eyes. “This incursion happened under my nose!” He clenched his jaw. “I can’t believe the Elders only sent a Human to help me contain this!”

  “What happened?” Penelope took a step backwards, getting out of the office into the waiting room.

  “Zone wipe.” The orange Elf sank into his chair. “The backup hybrid team wiped out on column 35.”

  Penelope flinched as she glanced over at Jeru. Did you know?

  “I can see everyone who is attached to the system; of course I knew when people died…” His voice trailed off. “And no, I didn’t tell you because that’s not your focus. You need to figure out the job stuff and worry about the fighting later once you’ve started over at the beginning.”

  The memory of ignoring the death screams of her original party members as she learned how to fight echoed in her mind. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths as she pushed the noise back behind the red door in her mind.

  “Something forces open that door and you’re going to drown in all the unpleasant things you lock up in there.” Jeru eyed her. “It’s not healthy to stick all the nasty stuff in the same place.”

  I know, but after a while, it became a habit. Push what I can’t handle out of my mind to get through the problem at hand, but… The door loomed in her mind space. Penelope dropped it back into the darkness in her mind. After a while, the volume of things that is hidden there became too much to sort once I was through the current problem. I know I shouldn’t keep adding to it, but at this point, I don’t know how to keep moving forward and it’s too big to deal with.

  “You need to spend a reset or ten sorting through all that trauma.” Jeru gave her a smile. “The good thing about looping is you’ve got all the time in the world. Who cares if you need months to process everything in there. Get it figured out and emptied so you don’t get blindsided when you fight something that preys on fear.”

  It feels like wasting time. Penelope swallowed.

  “If it makes you stronger, then it’s not wasted.” Jeru straightened and smoothed out his purple robe. “After a few thousand years of riding along in people’s heads, I’m a decent therapist.”

  I’ll keep that in mind. Penelope looked over at the orange Elf. “How bad does this set things back?”

  “It’s not the end of the world.” Cirdor motioned at the air to his right. “We’ve still got fifty-nine days and they’re just under halfway through. They want me to send in some of the backups we’re training right now, but…” He shook his head. “I don’t know that shuffling everything early is the answer.”

  “Why is it taking them so long to clear a square?” Penelope furrowed her brow. “It was taking us around an hour on the last floor.”

  “The area is mostly open, but there are electric storms to avoid. The monsters don’t care about getting hit, so our people have to take shelter whenever a storm runs over them, which slows everything down.” Cirdor sighed. “That’s how we lost the backups; they strayed too far from their shelter and couldn’t get back in time when the storm turned.”

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  “That’s horrible.” Penelope sat down in one of the seats on the wall near the outside of the building.

  “It’s a crime, is what it is.” He glared at her. “Every Human I’ve talked to has sung your praises about how you were their strongest fighter. As an Agent of the Elders, you should be down there slaying Demons, not playing around with potions.”

  “Would it have made any difference if I was down there?” Penelope shook her head. “It wasn’t the forward group that died; it was the backup of the backups. Literally the worst people down there. Me being down there wouldn’t have stopped any of that.” She swallowed as she realized what had just happened was one more thing she would have to prevent in the future.

  “Then what good are you?” Cirdor shook his head. “Master Jeru died giving you his burden.” He clenched his jaw. “I thought you would spend a few days on the surface, then head down there, but it seems you’re content to pretend to be a student while others are dying doing your JOB!”

  The nerves in her arms tingled as his anger and frustration washed over her. Her body begged her to run, but she knew that if it came down to another fight, she would win even faster than she had the last two against him. He might be able to hurt her, but not as badly as she could hurt him and she would be the one who walked away.

  Penelope closed her eyes and focused for a moment, letting the static dancing on her arms dissipate as she centered herself. She opened them and for a moment, thought about reminding the angry Elf who was stronger but decided a fight wasn’t the best course of action.

  “You’re angry.” She tilted her head to the side. “And scared.”

  “I’m not…!” His glare intensified, but only for a moment.

  “I’m not staying up here because I’m scared of fighting.” Penelope kept her voice calm. “I’m up here because I want to be able to make the gear and potions stronger for our people in the Dungeon. I want to be able to make better armor and weapons. I want to make it so that when I go back down on the fifth floor, we don’t have to worry about a whole group dying because they weren’t able to reach shelter in time.”

  “You’re putting in eight to ten hours a day.” Cirdor shook his head. “You’ll need to spend three years to master a single job.”

  “But only ten days to be proficient enough to continue learning on my own.” Penelope shrugged. “But to do that, I need my own station. Nellebrie has us sharing a single station and if I keep doing things where I’m splitting the time with two others, it’s going to take three times as long for me to grasp the basics.”

  “You want me to give you private tutoring?” Cirdor shook his head. “The Council would throw a fit unless I told them who you are.” The rage in his voice turned to uncertainty. “I’m not sure what they’d do if they learned a Human was an agent.”

  “He told them he recruited you to work for him, not that he is technically supposed to be working for you.” Jeru translated. “He’s hoping you don’t know that you outrank him and if it gets out who you actually are, he’s going to lose a lot of respect with the Council.”

  So don’t out him. Gotcha. Penelope sighed. “Look, I don’t want to cause trouble for you, but I do want to learn as much as I can before I go back into the Dungeon, but I can’t do that if I’m not allowed to learn.”

  “I’ll see what I can do about Professor Nellebrie.” Cirdor shook his head. “The stations aren’t the issue; it’s the raw materials that we don’t have a large supply of. We don’t have new stock coming in from offworld and you can’t use any of the stuff from the Dungeon because your level is too low and there isn’t anything left from the first floor.”

  “I’ll take whatever I can get.” She paused as another thought hit her. “Is Nellebrie planning on keeping everyone around until we’re all level ten or is she going to pass the others on and keep the three of us behind until we catch up?”

  Cirdor narrowed his gaze into a glare. “Titles are earned through prolonged effort and accomplishment; to omit them is an insult to all that they have done to get where they are.”

  “I didn’t realize it was more than just a job title.” Penelope glanced down at her hands to avoid this glare. “Is Professor Nellebrie going to keep everyone else in class until we catch up?”

  The orange man stayed silent for a moment, then sighed. “I’ve already talked to Professor Lungali Falone and told him to expect the majority of the students the day after next.”

  Penelope nodded as she looked up at him. “I heard you are planning on setting up gates inside the Dungeon so people can get around faster. Is that something you can show me how to do?”

  “You’re wanting to skip scrivening completely?” He tilted his head.

  “You’re going to teach us enchanting, aren’t you?”

  “The others need scrivening, enchanting, salvaging, herbalism, demonology, sewing, cooking, and jewelry making.” Cirdor counted each one off on his fingers. “That will take you to the end of this floor. The ability to make a gate requires at least a skill of level thirty, which I doubt you have the time to gain even if you spent your entire time working on your enchanting.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry, but that’s just out of your reach.”

  “Do you think we could have extra time in the lab?” She held up her hand. “Professor Nellebrie doesn’t have to be there. I just don’t want us to fall behind the others.”

  “I’ll gather up what extra materials I can for you, but if you start wasting them…” He sighed. “The deal is off.”

  “Thanks.” Penelope stood up. “I’ll let the others know we can stay late tomorrow.”

  Cirdor shooed her with his hand, then turned and walked back into his office without a word.

  I already knew I needed level thirty in enchanting before I restarted. Penelope paused at the front door as she looked out at the empty parking lot. Jeru, how am I supposed to get back to the island?

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