"Oh my gods that is the worst smell ever," Elica gasped, flinching away. She reacted to the smell before she reacted to me appearing out of a huge flash of blinding light. But honestly, fair, it really was pretty foul.

  "Sorry," I managed, and dispelled my leather and robes as I walked to the bath. "I'll shower up and everything's all right."

  I shut the door and shucked the only real clothes I had worn out, just smallclothes and shift, and I started the water. I hated knowing that this was actually the same water as ... that. Magic had filtered it and had screened it back, so that only the purest water would exit those pipes. But still, I was always going to be aware that this was the same water that those things swam in. And... worse.

  A tap at the door. "I'll be quick," I promised, calling out through the closed door. I stepped under the spray, and heated it up to drive the chill out of my body. Sorcery is awesome. Instant perfect-temperature shower.

  "Natalie?" Elica's voice came through, with a tone I didn't fully recognize.

  "Yes?" Ah, blessed soap, salvation. Time to scrub the scent of mildew and evil off of me.

  "Were you out, like way out, wearing black leather and covered in daggers?"

  It was three daggers, hardly covered. "Yes. Everything's under control."

  "So you can just leave, can't you?"

  "Uh huh." Shampoo, my salvation, come to my aid, get that smell off of me.

  "Without a pass? You can just skip the gates and the guards?"

  I paused, scrubbing my scalp and thinking, my mind starting to catch up to what she is saying. "You want me to take you with me next time."

  "What? Gods no! Wherever you need leather and daggers is no place for me! I just wanted you to drop me off at the shopping district for an afternoon this weekend."

  I started scrubbing harder. "Maybe I'm not going out this weekend."

  "Natalie, don't make me threaten to tell the administration that you were sneaking out. Blackmail demeans us both."

  "Maybe. Fine. But. Just a couple of hours. I want to be back before curfew, so we can't stay all day."

  "Sure, if you think you'll be done with killing whoever it is by then."

  I opened my mouth to protest. I'm not running around the city killing people! Except that I really couldn't. Not with that indicator waiting for a thought to reappear.

  [ You have earned 12 experience points. You are now a Level 4 Sorceress. You have 4 experience points. ]

  Killing monsters is not a very cost-effective way to gain XP and levels, but it's better than nothing. Also, it means there's less monsters. And killing them while I'm low level is worth some XP, as soon as my level is higher than theirs they are worth nothing to me. So, if you can level up with monster-hunting at low levels and save plot-line stuff for later, that's the most efficient way.

  So yeah, running around the city and killing whoever? She kind of had me pegged. There were always stories about nobles in disguise joining adventuring guilds and treasure-hunting parties. Sometimes for the thrill, or to bring honor onto their house, or just to get rich if they're from a minor house. Some of the stories are actually true.

  "A few hours should be plenty of time," I said after a long thoughtful minute. "We'll work out the details tomorrow."

  "Oh, yes, it'll take me a little while to make arrangements anyway."

  I heard something in her tone of voice, and it made me cautious. Like she was a little too satisfied, a little too confident. I paused, considered, and said "I can only bring a limited amount with me. If I try more than four or five people I will probably die."

  "Oh yeah that's fine," she said, which is a hell of a thing for someone to say in that context, and she walked away from the door. I was left trying to figure out what she meant by 'that's fine' in that sense, and then I took a deep breath, whirled the water around me at high speed to rinse, and then shut off the shower and then got rid of all the water on me at once and put it down the drain. I conjured a nightgown, picked up my fallen clothes, and tossed them into a hamper.

  Elica was in her bed with a sleep-mask on by the time I got out. I turned out the candle, slid under the blankets, and tried to relax myself. That cave behind the waterfall was absolutely terrifying. When Nathan finds it, there's an expeditionary force already set up, with lighting and scouting and maps, with pontoon bridges to walk along. And I, like a brave girl, went in there all alone, the hard way, and challenged them on their home turf. Maybe not the best idea.

  Home surf. Whatever.

  I called up the indicators, the status screen.

  [ Natalie Harigold ] [ Level 4 Sorceress ] [ Rival ]

  [ Strength 6 ][ Stamina 6 ][ Intellect 11 ][ Charisma 4 ]

  [ HP: 9/9 ][ MP: 14/14 ]

  [ Essence Gathered: (Select to Expand) ]

  [ Condition: Untethered Essence (can fully bind Essence 100%, can bind Essence more easily) ]

  [ Signet of the Seer ]

  After consideration, I increased my Strength to 7 using my unspent upgrade point. I had a skill point to spend, but I like to hold those in reserve until I know what I'm going to need. Whereas taking a point of Strength means that I can fight stronger enemies and keep upgrading. When I'm leveled up and don't have to worry about fighting enemies, I can start dumping ability points into Intellect to bring up my Mana, or into Stamina for more HP and more actions per day.

  Sadly, I'm not likely to ever spend for my Charisma. Charisma is used in the game to get you certain challenges that affect outcome. Strength is how likely you are to survive an encounter, but Charisma determines how likely you are to get a good ending to the game. And good-ending is not a priority for me. If I get the good ending to the story, that means that Nathan did not. It is not possible for us both to win. I'm just trying to make sure we both don't lose.

  I sat in my bed, and thought about the fact that my whole existence here was built around the understanding that I can't win without the whole world losing.

  Would you be surprised that it took me a while to fall asleep?

  I woke tired, but I dragged myself out of bed. Elica was already in the shower. I got dressed, and I opened the door when Rinnie showed up. Elica came out to get dressed, and Rinnie went to help her, and I headed out to breakfast, passing on most of the first-hour ablutions because I showered late at night. Today it was time for me to finally try something. I was giddy with anticipation and I fought not to get my hopes up. I had curved the air, so it would bend to my willl. As I skipped down the stairs the wind would arrange my hair, sorting it into a long fall down to my mid-back.

  I hit the stairwell and I pushed, pushed into my sorcery, the curve of magic, and the air cradled me and lifted me. I stepped into the air above the stairs, and I was buoyant. At long last, my magic was strong enough to lift me and carry me. I could fly. I'm not stupid. I am not going up to the roof to find out if I can fly. Stairwells give me a variety of altitudes to experiment with, and people will be by soon just in case something goes wrong. I've been planning for years how I'll practice, when I finally have the magical strength to fly.

  I coasted down the stairs, my feet never touching down. It was not a whipping wind that buffeted me upwards but a solid layer of air that closed around me and lifted like a hand. It was comforting, this elemental friend that would whirl me along and keep me safe. I still needed to work on strength and power output, but finally my sorcery was able to free me from gravity. Finally I had enough strength in it to carry me away, and I was not beholden to those laws of the earth. This last level-up was exactly what I needed.

  For years I had been just powerful enough that I could move at level planes with a little tension. To skate over water, to glide over quicksand. But last night, in that cavern? I did not want to skate on that water. I did not want to drift and skip over the surface of that endless drowning abyss. I did not want to sweep and swoop on the surface tension over cold depths full of ravenous things that chew first and ask questions later. I did not want to coast gracefully waiting for a webbed hand to grab my ankle and drag me down. I wanted to fly.

  I reached the bottom of the stairs too soon, and touched down regretfully. I wanted to throw myself out the door and scream with joy and zoom around in the perpetual night sky of Hearstcliff...but I needed to lock in. Job to do. Image to maintain. Also, if the school found out that I can fly, it would add sigils to the outer walls to keep me from flying over them. There was a powerful grounding spell embedded in that fence, but to prevent larger problems it was keyed to only affect people whose names and personal glyphs had been added on. Otherwise the outer reaches would be littered with dead bats, piles of bugs, and they'd be legally liable for anyone who was flying over the city and accidentally hit the invisible tripwires and was thrown to the ground here.

  I could still use the portals of the void, but if I could keep myself off the school's list of flyers, I'd like that. It keeps my options open. You never know, after all.

  Besides, I'd be doing more flying than I could stand, soon enough.

  I was dressed down a little bit today. Less "evil queen", more "malignant duchess". Lower collar, simpler lines, less pronounced angles. The skirt was a series of gathers and layers crisscrossing, it had a bit of flounce and movement that kept it kind of fun. Since I had started my day curving air, I just relied on a bubble of warmth instead of bringing a jacket this time. I almost channeled bat essence for the sensory upgrades, but I went with owl instead. The bat's ears were more sensitive, but much more forward-facing. They've got a better focus on what's in front but the owl is better for ambient sound, and people approaching from behind. Also, sharpened eyes were easier to adjust to than sonar-hearing.

  The day was nice enough, under a cloudless non-sky that never showed sun or weather, just the ongoing shine of a hundred-million crystalline lights that regulated their beams to keep the city lit. I was early out the doors but not the very earliest, there were others out and about on the pathways of the campus, some strictly following the white-gravel pathways, others meandering the grassy lawns. The grass here grew like it did not miss the sun, the whole area was so buttressed by spells that it was probably a footnote to keep grass growing year-round with nothing but starlight.

  The paintings in the game were always stunning, the architecture was fanciful but compelling. Never quite any one style that I could make out. I'm no architect, I don't know neo-Classical from Revival, and all my native knowledge of Hearstcliff styles are full of made-up history that doesn't map to how the game's concept and design team came up with their figures. So I'll just say that they are tall, grand, mostly made of white marble, with lots of columns and decoration and embellishments. Underground they like flat roofs, in Cliffside they favor steep shingled roofs, sometimes the snowfall here came very heavily.

  If you don't already have at least some idea of the layout of this campus it would be an absolute maze. Trying to tell these buildings apart at a distance is impossible, which of course leads to a lot of wonderful misunderstandings and chance meetings for the romance track. I wish them well, but meanwhile I need to get to the medical station.

  The supplemental admin building was mostly records and archives, storage and stuff like that. An overflow dining hall, a handful of assignment and distribution offices, a mail room that I'm not going to visit and that's not because I'm scared or traumatized or anything, and on the second floor there's the healer's office. There was only one full-time curative for the school, but they would hire in a couple of extras for special events like contact sparring or certain field events. I knocked on the door, and the doctor would see me now.

  "Healer Licard, at your service," he said. "What did you manage to get up to on only your second day here?"

  "Camogie," I explained, taking a seat. He was medium-height and shaped like a triangle, broad shoulders and narrow waist with thick limbs and neck. He was almost fully muscle-bound, in the sense of being restrained by his own physique. Bound by muscle. He could definitely not put his arms all the way down.

  "Ah," he said, and waved hands near me. "Hmm," he said. "Were you not wearing a helmet?"

  "I was," I said defensively.

  "Then get a better helmet, you've taken a nasty knock to the back of your head. And, it's very unusual to have taken a kick like this in practice. The muscle tears I understand. Chillblains, and the aftereffects of a close brush with hypothermia, though... And... the bends?" He gave me a gaze of flat disbelief, inviting me to explain myself. "Also, your entire dermis is scoured, somehow, in a way I've never seen before."

  "I guess I'm real bad at camogie," I tried to joke. I could feel the joke falling flat.

  "I suppose you must be," he gave me back nothing but dry sardonic detachment. "Also, a partially perforated eardrum, cracked bones in your hand, and the start of a stress fracture in your shin."

  I went a little quiet. "Ah, I didn't realize it was that bad," I said. "I guess it kind of snuck up on me."

  He shrugged, sort of. His elbows came up some and then down some. "I should say so. All is well though: I've never snitched on a student that wanted to do some off-the-books adventuring during their down time. I'll advise you to not jeopardize your grades or career, and to make sure you're still getting plenty of sleep. Young bodies need rest, after all. And to stay clear of thieves' guilds of any stripe; they like to hire on impressive new talent without telling them all the risks. Don't make yourself expendable to them."

  "I'm being as careful as I can under the circumstances," I promised him. "I'm not a thrill-seeker, I've just got some things to accomplish."

  "Forgive me if I stay skeptical," he said. HIs neck bulged as he shook his head. "Second day and you've got a dozen minor injuries. Some of which actually seem to be related to camogie. I've heard lots of reassurances from lots of junior treasure hunters and crime-fighters."

  "Can't be that many, you're only like five or six years older than me," I scoffed.

  He fixed me a look. "Every healer is a lot older than they look. It's a perk of the job. Now, let's get you fixed up."

  That was something for me to think about though. While he was mending my bruises and aches, I wondered if I was actually that different from other impulsive trouble-magnets. Surely there were things I could be doing to gain levels other than fighting monsters. And likewise, there are ways I can reduce the threat of monsters other than pushing my way into the unexplored depths and fighting them all by myself. Sure, doing things this way does solve two birds with one stone, but sometimes you need to base decisions on something other than the ratio of birds and stones.

  Oh right. Almost every method I had for gaining XP would take opportunities away from Nathan. I had to progress myself in such a way that he would not get locked in low levels by the mid-game.

  "Truth is I don't like fighting," I blurted out to the healer who seemed to be about half-done. "It sucks and I'm not actually good at it. I know I make a ton of easily avoidable mistakes. I wind up getting hurt a lot. And it never seems to matter how many overwhelming advantages I've got, my plans hardly ever work out right on the first try. It's always really uncomfortable and I'm worried about how I'm gonna get back afterwards. I've tried to toughen up, but I don't think I'm cut out for it. But there's people counting on me."

  "What kind of people?" he asked. I recognize that tone of voice. Humoring me.

  I sighed. "All of them."

  "That's terrible," Healer Licard said, as he finished up. "That sounds like a lot of pressure."

  "Thanks for listening," I said. I stood, and reached for the doorknob. "And for mending me. In about four years you'll understand what kind of pressure that really is." The door clicked shut behind me, ending our conversation.