RIVER CITY SHOPPING MALL

  KEOKUK, IOWA

  “THIS IS COMPLETE AND UTTER RAXX,” DEXIUS COMPLAINED as he looked at his reflection in the mirror that hung inside the ‘Number 3 Male Changing Room’ at the Langley & Finch clothing store, which was located at the ‘River City Shopping Mall’ l further downtown past the Square just before the bridge that led over the Mississippi River to the even smaller midwestern township of Hamilton, Illinois.

  Having changed out of his ‘Guardsman Tactical Uniform’, the Intergalactic Warrior now wore a navy-blue tank top with black jeans and black ‘L&F’ branded hiking (fashion) boots.

  Looking his reflection over still, the extraterrestrial teenager had a wincing look on his war hardened face.

  Dexius felt unsure about his new Aeshlaran… HUMAN outfit. It was awfully different from the garb that he was used to wearing back on Guardinas… But he was no longer on Guardinas. He was now on Aeshlara… EARTH… PERMANENTLY.

  “How does it look, Dexius?” Castron asked from outside of the changing room. “Are you ready???”

  “I… do not know,” Dexius awkwardly replied as he continued to look over himself in the mirror.

  “Come on out and let me take a look for myself.”

  “Ugh… As you wish.”

  As the young soldier stepped out of the changing room he was greeted by Lord Lakarias, who was wearing a trench coat, a fedora, and a scarf around his neck.

  Armed with only his walking cane, the white- haired and bearded hermit looked over the eighteen-cycle-old Guardinian Refugee up and down.

  “Hmm,” Castron hummed. “An interesting choice of… wardrobe, you have made, Lieutenant.”

  Looking over his new human outfit once more, Dexius asked, “Castron… Are you certain that the Aeshlarans dress in robes such as these?”

  “Yes, Dexius. The adolescent ones do… And remember that they are not called ‘Aeshlarans’ on this planet. They are called--”

  “HUMANS. Yes, yes. I remember. Tis just a bit… difficult to get used to all of this.”

  “It’s alright, Dexius. You shall learn soon enough. So, how do they feel? The clothes… Do you like them?”

  “They feel... constrictive.”

  Looking up towards Castron once more, the Blue Guardian continued, “If I were to be in combat with a foe then they would be a weakness. A weakness that my enemy would most DEFINITELY exploit if they were ever to discover it.”

  As Castron looked at the Lieutenant again, a few passing teenage girls caught a glimpse of the young alien. Smiling and giggling, the girls brushed past Dexius, causing him to look at them in confusion.

  “I think that those two young ladies think otherwise, Lord-Guardian,” Castron smirked.

  Giving the old hermit an irritated glare, Dexius fumed, “Urgh… I do not care about what these humans think of me, my Lord. Their opinions fall upon deaf ears. Now… WHERE IS THE PRINCESS???”

  “I let her go pick out her own choice of clothing after you entered the Changing Room.”

  “YOU WHAT?!”

  Castron’s eyes then widened in surprise as Dexius stressed with a crazed expression on his chiseled face, “You… You mean to tell me that you allowed the Royal Lady-Princess of Guardinas to venture off on an ‘Unfamiliar Planet’... ALL BY HERSELF AND UNPROTECTED???”

  “Yes, that I did,” Lord Lakarias nodded. “And Dexius, do please try to ‘calm’ yourself. People are beginning to loo--”

  “THRACK!” Dexius suddenly raged in a voice that carried throughout the whole store.

  With a manic look in his turquoise eyes, the Lieutenant snared, “How could you do something so reckless in such dire times as these, Castron?! HOW?!?!”

  “EVERYTHING IS FINE, DEXIUS. There is no imminent threat to either you or Ashanna’s lives here. This, I can assure you of.”

  “NO. I must stay by her side. I must guard her life-cycle with my own.”

  Thinking of his last interaction with King Luxor before fleeing Guardinas, Dexius lowered his brow as he stated firmly, “At all costs…”

  “Lieutenant, this is not Guardinas…. THIS IS EARTH,” Castron sternly stated. “There is no reason for you to feel afraid or worrisome. Both you and the Lady-Princess… As well as myself are completely and totally safe.”

  “NO! I MUST FIND HER!!!” Dexius roared as he shockingly shoved past the old hermit.

  As the Blue Guardian raced out of the store, Lord Lakarias called out, “WAIT! YOU STILL HAVE TO…”

  Once Dexius exited the store the Shoplifting Alarms went off.

  Ignoring this, the Blue Guardian went in search of the Princess as Castron finished saying, “Pay...”

  Looking at the ‘L&F’ employees, who stood behind at the front desk and all around the store, Castron said while pulling out a wad of fifties from within his right coat pocket, “Ugh… Don’t worry. I shall cover it myself.”

  _

  “ASHANNA! ASHANNA!!!” Dexius cried as he raced down a heavily packed walkway in the crowded River City Shopping Mall in frantic search of the Royal Guardinian Lady-Princess.

  With no sign of the Princess in sight, Dexius continued to look for her.

  Pushing and shoving past Mall Visitors as he went, angering and disturbing several of them in a process, Dexius even managed to get a few of the Mall’s Security Guards to eyeball him as he ran around like some kind of ‘crazy person’.

  So, while the Blue Guardian continued his frantic search he brushed past Josh Russell, who was sitting on a wooden bench in front of a Water Fountain all by himself.

  Ignoring the manic alien soldier due to him thinking to be some ‘tweaking-out teenager’, Josh was just messing around on his White cased UPhone as waited for his ‘friends’ to meet up with him.

  These so-called ‘friends’ were Brent, Amber, Shaw, and Greenberg.

  As Josh continued to bury his eyes (and attention span) in his phone’s screen, walking past him on the other side of the Water Fountain was Kyle, Eric, Sam, and Derek.

  With Jim having already made it to his job (which was located in the Shopping Mall) his four other ‘friends’ went about their own business.

  Whilst the quartet trekked towards the Mall’s Food Court area, walking out of the KC Jenny's Clothing Store, set far away on Josh’s side of the Water Fountain, was Brent, Amber, Greenberg, and Shaw.

  Amber had an ecstatic look on her face as Greenberg and Shaw held all of her bags.

  Brent, on the other hand, had a very displeased look on his face because he HATED shopping with Amber.

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  “Ugh… Alright, babe,” Brent sighed. “You’ve got your stuff so can we go to Beels Sporting Goods now? I gotta get some new cleats for the Homecoming Game next Friday.”

  Looking down at her own UPhone’s Screen, Amber replied, “We will, dear, we will... AFTER we go to Pandora’s first.”

  “Urgh… Why do we have to go there, Amber?” Brent angrily demanded. “We’ve already been to, like, a ZILLION stores for you today and NONE for me.”

  “OR US,” Shaw and Greenberg both said in unison.

  “SHUT IT!” Brent snapped, silencing both of his lackeys.

  Pulling her eyes away from her phone’s screen so she could narrow them at her boyfriend, Amber gritted, “Because I still need to pick up my dress and heels for the Homecoming Dance next Saturday, Brenton. That’s why we have to go there.”

  Brent scoffed in disgust.

  “They just came in today,” Amber continued. “What a coincidence, right?”

  “Yeah, yeah. I guess,” Brent said lifelessly. “But can we PLEASE go to where I need to go after you finish getting your stuff?”

  “Ugh… Fine, Brent,” Amber sighed. “We’ll go to Beels after Pandora’s.”

  With a pleased grin on his slimy face, Brent happily said, “Thanks, babe.”

  While Brent and Amber traded smiles with one another Greenberg called out, “HEY, B! I think that’s Josh over there!”

  Looking ahead of his group’s current position, Brent caught sight of Josh sitting alone on a bench in front of the Water Fountain.

  “Heh, heh… Well, looky there,” Brent smirked. “Come on, guys.”

  Brent then led his girlfriend and two lackeys over to the Water Fountain to meet with Josh.

  “HEY THERE, RUSSELL!” Brent alarmed whilst he, Amber, Greenberg, and Shall all approached Josh over by the Water Fountain, causing the Star Running Back to jump slightly.

  “Sup, guys?” Josh greeted as he stood up from his seat on the wooden bench.

  Looking at Brent first, Josh said directly, “Brent.”

  He then looked over to Greenberg and Shaw and said, “Guys.”

  Then finally, Josh looked down at Amber and said to her kindly, “Hey, Amber.”

  “Hi, Josh.” Amber sweetly replied.

  Scrunching his brow, Brent stepped in between Josh and Amber to ask his supposed ‘best friend’, “SO, you feelin’ ‘better’ today, bro?”

  “What do you mean, Brent?” Josh asked in confusion.

  “I MEAN do you have your HEAD ON STRAIGHT now ‘cause last night, to be incredibly honest with you, the way you were actin’ kinda pissed me THE FUCK off.”

  “The way I was acting? Like how?”

  “Like how you were sticking up for those FREAKSHOW REJECTS at the Hut last night. It was TOTALLY uncool of you, bro.”

  Rolling his eyes, Josh sighed, “Ugh… Jesus, Brent. Seriously???”

  “Yeah, Josh… SERIOUSLY,” Brent firmly confirmed.

  Shaking his head now, Josh sighed, “Ugh… Brent, just forget about it, will you? I came here to chill and hang. NOT TO FIGHT.”

  Brent now glared intensely at Josh whilst anger burned in his eyes like small, raging fires.

  “BRENTON... PANDORAS,” Amber sternly ordered, cutting the tension down between the two High School Football Playing All Stars.

  “Ugh… Fine, Amb. Alright,” Brent replied in an annoyed tone.

  Glaring at Josh once more, Brent ordered, “C’mon, Russell… FALL IN LINE.”

  “Fall in line? You’re joking, right?” Josh asked with his brow scrunched.

  “Y’wanna roll with us… OR NOT?” Brent asked in a bitter tone.

  “Yeah, yeah. I’ll roll with you guys… BUT I WON’T ‘FALL IN LINE’,” Josh stated firmly. “The last time I checked, this ain’t the ‘army’, bruh. Heh, heh… I can’t believe you actually said that, Brent. Fall in line. Heh, heh… So lame.”

  Eyes widened, Brent growled, “YOU MOTHER…”

  “BRENT!” Amber snapped, suppressing her boyfriend’s rage again.

  “ALRIGHT, AMBER! ALRIGHT! I’M GOING! JESUS!” Brent erupted as he allowed his girlfriend to pull him along towards the Pandora’s Box Female Clothing Store.

  Shaw and Greenberg sulked behind in suit like the mindless goons that they were whilst carrying Amber’s shopping bags still.

  As for Josh, he just snickered and shook his while following the others from the rear.

  _

  WITH IT NOW BEING ALMOST NOON, Kyle, Sam, Eric, and Derek had all finally reached the Mall’s Food Court.

  There, the four caught an early break on getting lunch before the court was packed with several other fellow shoppers.

  After they had gotten their food, the teens picked out two conjoined eating tables which were near a couple fake, potted plants.

  Sam and Kyle sat across from one another as Eric did from Derek.

  Eric sat beside Kyle while Derek sat beside Sam.

  “Sam… Cut it out,” Eric ordered after swallowing down a chewed up piece of hamburger and bun after noticing the playful Tomboy smirk and ‘wink’ at Kyle.

  “And just what exactly is it that I need to ‘cut out’, Erickson,” Sam spurned, angering Eric once more.

  “Don’t play dumb with me!” Eric then erupted. “I saw you ‘eye-fucking’ Kyle!”

  “ERIC! What the hell, man?!” Kyle shouted at his stoner friend.

  Putting down his half-eaten hamburger, Eric fried right back, “Ah shut it, Gordon! I know what’s going on here! It’s the SAME DAMN THING that happens every time Sam tags along with us.”

  Leaning forward, Sam asked, “And that is???”

  “YOU FLIRTING WITH KYLE ALL THE FUCKIN’ TIME!!!”

  Sam smirked as Kyle began to blush in embarrassment.

  Derek, on the other hand, watched from the side innocently with his eyes widened as Sam replied, “Oh, Eric. Eric, Eric, Eric… Why must you always make such a fuss about every teensy, weensy, tiny, little thing?”

  “Because you’re always doing something to piss me off!” Eric raged.

  “E, LAY OFF, DUDE,” Kyle ordered with his brow now lowered Sam just rolled her eyes. “I understand that you don’t like the fact that your guys’ parents are with each other, but the least you both can do… ESPECIALLY YOU, ERIC, is be ‘civil’ with each other whenever you're around the rest of the group.”

  “Heh, heh… Yeah, Eric,” Sam snickered. “Be civil. Heh, heh…”

  This almost caused Eric to scream…Until someone else screamed for him.

  “ARGH! HEY! LET ME GO! URGH… GET YOUR PAWS OFF ME, YOU DAMN, DIRTY RENT-A-COPS! YOU’RE RUININ’ THE MERCH!”

  The quartet then turned their eyes towards a rather frantic person who was wearing a stuffed ‘Buckley Beaver’ costume whilst being dragged kicking and screaming out of the Mall by two morbidly obese Security Guards.

  “FUCK,” Derek, Kyle, and Eric all said aloud in unison as Sam looked over at the ‘freaking out’ Mascot in confusion.

  Munching on a French Fry, Sam asked curiously, “Hmm… I wonder why those ‘Rent-A-Cops’ are kickin’ a Corporate American ICON such as ‘Buckley Beaver’ out of the mall?”

  As the Security Guards continued to drag the World-Renowned Mascot of ‘Buckley Beaver’s Pizzeria and Arcade’ out of the mall, Derek said, “Oh juh-juh-jeez.”

  “SON OF A BITCH,” Eric gritted in total anger and annoyance. “We literally just got here like what? Ten? FIFTEEN minutes ago and he’s ALREADY gettin’ thrown out? Shit. This has gotta be some kind of a record or somethin’. ”

  “Ugh… MAN,” Kyle sighed whilst Sam looked at him, Eric, and Derek like they were crazy.

  “What’s wrong with you goobs?” Sam asked abruptly.

  Looking at the Tomboy with ‘drained’ expressions on their face, the ‘Goober Gang Trio’ said in unison (again), “JIM.”