When I finally started to wake up, I curled in on myself. I reached for a pillow and put it over my head as I tried to turn my brain off. It felt like two people were taking a pickaxe to the inside of my skull, right behind my eyes, and were getting a bonus if they broke through. My jaw also hurt like hell.

  A knock at the door forced me to peak my head out from under the pillow. “Go away…” I moaned out and put the pillow back over my head.

  “Lady Dani, I must insist on you getting up. We need to get you fitted with some armor and Priest Toren has come by to check up on you.” It was Grimoire’s voice.

  Groaning, I slowly started to sit up in the bed. Looking down, I noticed I was still dressed in my clothes from last night. I sniffed at my shirt and could still smell alcohol. Which meant I really did need to get up. Even if I really wanted to lay back down.

  With monumental effort, I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood up. I wobbled a little, but caught myself on a chair before stumbling my way to the bathroom. I splashed some water on my face, and some into my mouth, before taking a look in the mirror. There was a rather impressive bruise on the side of my face.

  I poked at it.

  “Ow! Fuck!” I yelped out and hissed in pain. The swearing didn’t make me feel any better, since it also caused my face to hurt as I spoke.

  In a haze, I focused and cast my Heal spell. I watched in real time as the bruise went through a series of colors before disappearing after about two minutes of casting. I worked my jaw a little to make sure it felt alright. When I was satisfied, I went about the process of feeling a little more like a person.

  It took maybe twenty minutes before I made it downstairs. My hair was still wet and tied into a messy tail high in the back to keep it out of the way. I was wearing one of the more casual outfits, red shirt and brown pants, and trying not to stumble as I drank water straight from the pitcher that had been left on my bedside.

  When I made it to the kitchen, someone had finally let the butler know where I was. He showed up and escorted me towards one of the lounges near the entrance. I saw a platter of what looked like white rolls with cheese melting out of them and sprinkled with some kind of seasoning. I immediately snatched one and took a big bite. It was made from egg, apparently, and was delicious.

  Someone cleared their throat, and I turned to see Toren not even trying to hide his amusement. “Hungry?”

  With no shame, I nodded and grabbed two more with one hand before plopping down on the couch opposite of him. My pitcher had been replaced with a mug filled with coffee, which I drank cautiously from. “How’d the rest of your night go?” I asked before practically inhaling one of the egg rolls.

  The priest sighed, “Boring, mostly. Lots of the councilors trying to give funds to ‘improve the quality of the shelters’.” Toren snorted, “Other nobles were trying the same things, and the other church officials kept making snide comments about neglecting my duties by not attending those wastes of time.”

  “Which brings me to my next question… Director?” I raised an eyebrow. “I thought you were just working at one of the shelters.”

  He waved a hand dismissively, “When one needs a hand, I fill in. Director just means I’m the one willing to take responsibility for the shelters. It’s not that big of a deal.”

  I blinked, “Wait, all of them? In the city?”

  Toren nodded, “Reason I can’t be here at your beck and call, my lady.” The sour face I made caused him to chuckle. “In all seriousness, the whole thing runs itself. Everyone knows their jobs and I’m the one who ran interviews of those running the individual shelters. I just… fix problems.”

  “That doesn’t sound ominous.” I muttered as I drank from my mug.

  The priest laughed again, “Anything like that, I leave to the guards.”

  Grimoire came in with another maid at that point. He had the other maid take my measurements and then they then left to ‘find something that would work’.

  “I take it Deacon is off at the adventurer’s guild?” Toren asked.

  I shrugged, “Probably. I’m still recovering from last night. Apparently, I did something reckless and stupid.”

  “What else is new?” Toren said as he leaned over and grabbed one of the eggrolls for himself. “You’re still giving me lip, so it must not have been that bad.”

  “Thanks, gramps.” I rolled my eyes.

  He pointed a finger at me, “That’s exactly what I mean.” His face was stern, but his eyes twinkled with amusement.

  “I haven’t even gone through the notifications trying to get my attention, too busy trying to get back to some kind of normal.” I finished off the last of the rolls I’d grabbed and considered grabbing another.

  Toren grunted as he stood up, “Well, you should probably get on that. I only came by to make sure you and Deacon were okay. Be sure to give him my regards.”

  “Busy day?” I asked, setting my coffee down and snagging another eggroll.

  Toren’s shoulders slumped and he sighed deeply, “Meetings. Booked for the next two weeks as well, so I will not be able to make our regular visits.”

  I nodded, even if he couldn’t see me, “I might be out of the city anyway, so that’s fine. Going to finally see how bad the monster situation is.”

  The priest turned his head to look at me, “You should be fine. Try to start slow and make sure to rest when you can.”

  “Right.” I said after swallowing the rest of my egg roll. “I’ll make sure to pack some food and water too, just in case.”

  Toren smiled, “Ah, common sense. Such a rare trait in this world.” He headed out the door.

  I sat there for a while, finishing up the eggrolls and my coffee. A maid eventually came in and left a pitcher full of coffee and a few more snacks. She let me know that Grimoire was out taking care of the armor and that he requested I stay indoors.

  I didn’t care, since I was going to take it slow today. The healing had only taken care of the damage to my jaw, not the throbbing in my head.

  The dream wasn’t helping either.

  The feelings had lingered, and while I’d ignored them for the most part, alone in the lounge I let myself feel what Alexei had kept buried. The exhaustion. The sadness. The grief.

  I managed to avoid crying, but it was rough. It wasn’t an intense feeling, just a blanket over everything, smothering other emotions. Feeling like that likely wasn’t healthy, but it felt like something I needed to do. All for a woman I still barely knew anything about.

  Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

  There was one person I could ask… but I wasn’t sure if he’d respond. And I didn’t think I was ready to know. Not with how confusing everything still was.

  I’d been trying to avoid it, but when Elias had kissed me, a memory that still made me cringe in disgust, it had driven home just how out of place I was. Even tearing apart Danielle’s life didn’t seem to help me feel like myself. Remembering bits and pieces of Alexei’s life didn’t fit because of the person I saw in the mirror. I felt the need to find something that was mine.

  I didn’t even know where to start with that.

  So, instead, I took a look at the notifications.

  

  

  

  

  There were two more just like that, and each only had 3 options. I wanted to go through other notifications though.