Why was there a giant lobster wearing a suit who apparently had guns for claws? Since when did the world have that kind of monster?

  Probably for a while, but since it barely involved cheese, Colby didn’t need to know about it. The closest link a lobster had to cheese was lobster thermidor, but that dish was gross. Seafood was disgusting!

  Whatever the case, he just had to focus on running. Something he was apparently terrible at.

  Lob-stirs, lob-stabs, and lob-slices had somehow managed to overtake him despite his headstart. No fair! They had eight legs, while all he had was two—just disregard the fact that he had managed to outrun them before.

  They ran around his legs, not even bothering to stir, stab, or slice his shins. Instead, they ran towards the cove, banging their claws together in a crustacean-laced panic.

  At least he didn’t have to waste time defending himself from them. But that just showcased how big a threat the huge suit-wearing lobster was.

  And Colby did not want to find out what was so scary about it, beyond the fact that it was big, red, and shooting bullets out of its claws.

  He tossed his shoes into his Inventory, feeling the coarse sand sinking between his toes. Stepping on a rock was the least of his worries right now. Barefooted, Colby ran faster, just barely. But just barely was better than being shot in the back by a crazy lobster.

  Colby entered the cove along with the lobsters. And they exited it before he had even made it halfway through. Thornelius barked, echoing along the rocky walls. The Thornwolf pulled on his hair, forcing him to turn around.

  “What is it, boy?” Colby yelled, nearly losing his balance and diving face-first into the soft sand.

  But that was the least of his worries.

  The herd of su-sheep was catching up. And unfortunately for him, they wouldn’t steer around him like the much smaller lobsters. In their panic, they’d trample him.

  Curds!

  What could he do? It’s not like he could run faster or get out of the way. He was stuck inside the cove where he, Elaine, and Porter had marked out their dreams. Rocky walls surrounded him. All he had was cheese. [Cheese With An Edge] could barely cut through plant roots; he wouldn’t be able to carve a little hidey hole into the rock.

  Or maybe he didn’t have to.

  Mother Nature had already carved a little hidey hole for him. It was this cove. And the best way to get out of this sticky situation was to get even stickier.

  “Thornelius, do you trust me?”

  The Thornwolf barked and licked his face.

  It was a rush order, but it didn’t have to be perfect, just good enough. A [Cheese Helmet] and [Cheese Chestplate] appeared in Colby’s palms. The [Cheese Chestplate] had been modified to more canine proportions. And Stove had done an extra good job on roasting the mozzarella. Only the outer surface was goopy and sticky, while the inner was soft and comfortable.

  Congratulations! [Stickious Cheesious] has reached Level 6!

  Colby pressed the cheese armor over Thornelius’s leafy fur, ensuring that it wouldn’t slip off the best boy’s best body.

  This better work.

  Using all the muscles that his career as a cheesemaker had developed—which wasn’t a lot—he hurled the cheese-covered Thornelius towards the roof.

  Thankfully, Thornelius was much smaller than the Thornwolves that had attacked him a couple of days ago. There was no way he’d be able to throw Thornelius if he were bigger. But Thornelius was still a bit too big—not that Colby wasn’t strong enough.

  He was nowhere near the ceiling of the cove. Instead, the Thornwolf curved through the air, spinning slightly before slamming into the rocky wall. He stuck there, clinging to the stone as loose pebbles rattled and fell onto the sand below.

  Curds!

  “Thornelius! Are you okay?”

  The Thornwolf shook off its daze and looked down at him. He let out a happy bark, letting Colby know that he was okay, for the most part.

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  Not what he wanted, but it was good enough.

  No time to pat himself on the back. The su-sheep stampede was gaining on him.

  He only had a limited supply of this cheese and this was the best workaround he could come up with on such short notice.

  Chunks of aged Gouda fired out of his palm, sticking to the wall thanks to [Stickious Cheesious]. Colby had made a set of makeshift stairs, except the steps were barely large enough to hold half of his foot, and way too wide for any average height or above average height person to cover.

  A layer of [Stickious Cheesious] cheese armor appeared over his body. Colby raised his palm towards Thornelius, shooting out a [Stickious Cheesious] [Cheese Glove]. Trailing behind the flying cheese projectile, attached to the wrist, was a thick strand of [String Cheese] that Colby held onto.

  Congratulations! [String Cheese] has reached Level 2!

  The[Stickious Cheesious] [Cheese Glove] stuck to the wall right in front of Thornelius. Hopefully, this would work.

  “Now, boy!” Colby yelled.

  Colby jumped towards the wall, pulling on the [String Cheese] with all his might. The line slacked mid-air, but he had already accounted for this. He pulled hard on the [String Cheese] once more. The moment the line became taut, Thornelius yanked on it with his incredibly strong jaw, pulling him closer.

  Thornelis was strong, but not strong enough to yank him all the way up there. He was, however, strong enough to make up for the gap between steps.

  Colby hopped the Aged Gouda, as Thornelius assisted him to the next one and the next, until he crashed into the wall a bit lower than where Thornelius had landed, but high enough to avoid being trampled by the herd of Su-sheep.

  Two slightly larger pieces of Aged Gouda were stuck to the wall. He rested his feet on it, while he made sure he was extra glued to the wall with [Stickious Cheesious].

  Colby glanced down, watching as the Su-sheep stampeded past him, kicking up a cloud of sand in the process.

  The entire time, he prayed to the great Gouda in the sky that he’d remained stuck to the wall. [Stickious Cheesious] had gone up a level, but was it sticky enough to hold an average height and average weight boy like him?

  Apparently, yes, it was.

  Affixed to the wall and with nothing to do, he watched as the herd of colorful rice-coated su-sheep stormed past him. It was great that he had found the su-sheep—more like they had found him. Now, he just had to find a way to convince them to give him some of their milk.

  As the last of the su-sheep exited the cove, Colby breathed a sigh of relief, only to regret it. A cloud of sand entered his lungs, forcing him to wheeze.

  Thunderous gunfire and the heavy clacking of crustacean legs against the sand immediately shut him up. Colby clenched his jaw tight, forcing his mouth close, suppressing the ever-growing urge to hack his lungs out as they screamed for release.

  Below him, the massive lobster barreled past, frothing at the mouth. The tailored large suit strained with every skitter as it stabbed its legs into the sand like it owed protection money.

  It flailed its claws, firing shelled projectiles—that looked like pearls, only less shiny. They slammed into the ceiling above, punching through solid rock and embedding themselves into their new home. Pebbles and dust rained down while ear-destroying echoes rebounded across the cove.

  Thank Gouda he wasn’t strong enough to get onto the ceiling, if not, he would’ve gotten a feel of what it was like to be Swiss cheese.

  As he held his breath, Colby noticed something changing. It was barely noticeable to the untrained eye, but his eyes had been trained from years of being Elaine’s ex-best friend.

  He was growing shorter.

  More accurately, he was falling.

  He said he was glad to not be on the ceiling, but that didn’t mean he wanted to be on the floor.

  Strands of [Stickious Cheesious] armor peeled off the rock wall as Colby plummeted. He hit the soft sand hard, driving the air out of his lungs as he let out a pained whine that sounded like a squeaky chair.

  Had that large lobster heard him fall? Had it heard him make that weird noise?

  His face was too buried in the sand to tell.

  Something wet splattered onto him. The presence of something very large shifting the sand around his body told him all he had to know.

  So this was it.

  Cheese was his calling—and now cheese was calling him. It was time to be one with the Swiss cheese.

  A sharp bark cracked through the cove, slamming straight into his skull and sending his brain into overdrive.

  Thornelius! If you had just kept quiet, you could’ve lived.

  Fighting through the pain, Colby forced himself up, limbs shaking as his feet sank into the sand.

  The lobster was a couple of inches taller than him but several times wider. Its attention had shifted, eyestalks focusing up on Thornwolf stuck to the wall.

  Thornelius kept barking, baring its teeth. A low growl rumbling out of its leaves as it berated the lobster for hurting his master.

  The lobster fired.

  “Thornelius!”

  Colby stuck his palm out, firing off a desperate [Hard as Cheese] [Cheese Shot] at the bullet, in hopes of deflecting it.

  It was many times faster, larger, and harder.

  It was too late.

  Time seemed to slow down as Colby watched the shelled sphere fly towards his furry friend.

  I’m sorry, Thornelius.