Chapter 48 – “The Rumor Rebellion!”

  Scene: Konoha – Morning – Academy Grounds

  A group of genin gather around, whispering loudly as if everyone should overhear.

  Genin 1:

  “Did you hear?! Iruka-sensei… Kakashi… and Might Guy… in a love triangle!!”

  Genin 2:

  “No way! Iruka was blushing yesterday when Kakashi and Guy were bickering!”

  Genin 3:

  “And Kakashi said ‘duffer’ to Iruka—THAT’S love language!”

  Cut to Ichiraku Ramen. Naruto chokes on his ramen.

  Naruto:

  “WHAT THE—?! Love triangle?! Iruka-sensei?!”

  Sasuke (deadpan):

  “…I knew it.”

  Naruto:

  “WHADDYA MEAN ‘YOU KNEW IT’?!”

  Scene: Outside Hokage’s Office

  Kakashi is surrounded by reporters and fangirls.

  Reporter Lady:

  “Hatake-sama, what do you say about the Kakashi-Iruka-Guy Triangle?”

  Kakashi (sighing, muttering):

  “…This is worse than when I accidentally published my diary.”

  Suddenly, Might Guy bursts in, wheelchair rolling heroically.

  Might Guy:

  “MY ETERNAL RIVAL! I WILL FIGHT FOR YOU!”

  Tenten (facepalming, pushing him):

  “Please stop screaming romantic poetry, Guy-sensei…”

  Guy:

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  “I WROTE A POEM CALLED FLAMES OF OUR FRIENDSHIP, KAKASHI! DO YOU WANT TO HEAR?!”

  Kakashi (vein popping):

  “Bastard, they’ll think we’re dating again, teme!”

  Iruka (entering, blushing furiously):

  “W-why is everyone staring at me?! I didn’t start anything!”

  Random Genin:

  “He’s the cinnamon roll caught between two disaster dads…”

  Scene: Training Grounds

  Sumire approaches Yuta, confused.

  Sumire:

  “Why is everyone saying Kakashi is in a triangle with Iruka and Guy?”

  Yuta (shrugging):

  “Because I handed you off to two single dads, and now the village thinks it’s some weird parenting throuple.”

  Sumire (deadpan):

  “…You’re the reason this happened.”

  Yuta (grinning):

  “You’re welcome.”

  Scene: Hokage Office

  Naruto buries his face in paperwork.

  Naruto:

  “Why are there reports about ‘Sasunaru Romance Rumors’?!”

  Sasuke (calmly sipping tea):

  “…Guess they saw our blush yesterday.”

  Naruto (panicking):

  “They think we’re married in another universe?!”

  Boruto (walking in):

  “Dad, it’s trending. ‘Sasunaru Supreme’ is the top hashtag. Even Temari posted something.”

  Naruto (screaming):

  “WHAT DID SHE POST?!”

  Shikadai (smirking):

  “A meme of you and Sasuke hugging with the caption ‘Power Couple Goals’.”

  Sasuke (smirking at Naruto):

  “You’re popular, Hokage-sama.”

  Naruto:

  “I’m gonna lose my goddamn mind—”

  Scene: At the Park – That Afternoon

  Ryouta, Sarada, Himawari, and the others hide from the chaos.

  Ryouta:

  “Even I heard some students saying Sasunaru and Kakashi x Iruka are canon. What is happening?”

  Sarada (laughing):

  “Wanna bet who cracks first—Naruto or Kakashi?”

  Ryouta:

  “Ten ryo says Kakashi. He’s already being hunted by aunties.”

  Himawari (innocent):

  “…What’s Sasunaru?”

  Ryouta gently rests his head on hers, careful not to startle her.

  Ryouta:

  “You’re too pure for this nonsense.”

  Himawari (blushing):

  “Y-you’re so weird, Ryo-kun…”

  Scene: Nightfall – The Rumors Fade

  After Naruto personally clarifies at a press conference, and Kakashi handles a few snooping jonin with D-rank paperwork, the rumors finally die down.

  Iruka (relieved):

  “Thank Kami it’s over…”

  Guy (still dramatic):

  “I WILL WRITE A FINALE TO OUR NON-EXISTENT TRILOGY!”

  Kakashi:

  “…I’m going back to retirement"

  definitely going to have to grow into that protector role.

  Sasunaru Supreme meme trend is definitely not canon… maybe.