My eyes opened, and I laid in a luxe enormous bed. The tips of my tails were still red, and my body ached as it hadn't healed completely.

  Still 3 lives but for how long?

  Realization set in that those events weren't one of my many nightmares but real. I went to my spirit core to seek serenity as panic slowly returned.

  I need a calm mind to form a plan. Clearing my mind was challenging as flashbacks kept reminding me of my failure. Scenes of Yv acting indifferent, scenes of Giana getting sealed, and scenes of the rest looking at me as if I'm a stranger.

  It wasn't perfect, but I had worked hard on my relationships with them. It was disheartening to lose them and have my efforts invalidated by a random, overpowered god. This guy is probably stronger than a minor god and seemed more competent than most of the Sarian gods. If only Giana and I were 3 years old…our spatiotemporal maturity would have made this an easy matchup.

  I sighed and managed to temporarily detach myself from my feelings and calmed down, causing me to reach my spirit core. It was as calming as ever. It didn't solve my problems, but it was a great way to keep myself together. I spent a good amount of time there before I got broken out of it by the sound of a door opening and someone exclaiming. “You're awake!”

  My eyes opened and a young woman with blonde hair dove at me. It wasn't Giana, so I strained my body to evade. The mystery woman missed and face planted into the bed besides me. “Fugya!”

  What a strange sound…who makes that sound when face planting?

  “Owowow, you're not supposed to dodge that! You should catch your cute master!” She said as she recovered and made a dumb pose, trying to act cute. Is she related to Azu somehow? Her appearance is far from Azu, but she acts similarly. She wore a red and white frilly dress that reminded me of those characters in movies. It was similar to what the cute ones wore.

  Ugh my head. I don't have time for this. Go back to watching TV.

  “Tss tss!” The strange woman said while leaning forward and wagging her index finger. “That's not how you're supposed to address your master and savior!”

  Not sure on the saving part but you are certainly not my master…

  “Aww come on! Don't you want to serve a master as cute as me?” She said as she struck another dumb pose. At least this chick isn't stressing me out or overly annoying.

  Hey, are you really a goddess? You seem different from the rest.

  “Me? A goddess? Oh gosh! Skipping the ‘master’ and going straight for ‘goddess’! My heart…” The strange woman said as she collapsed to her knees. “...wasn't ready for this.” She said as she looked up at me.

  Are you the goddess of idiots or acting?

  “Ah! You called me a goddess again!” She said as she faked a recoil. She is faking it, right? I'm not picking up on deception though… “You sure know how to fight back. The inhabitants from below are terrifying.” She said as she got up. She acted as if she had endured a strong attack. Who is this weirdo?

  Very well, you've piqued my interest…who are you?

  A smile appeared on her face. “I'm Camilla, a goddess of the spatiotemporal and wealth!” She said as she made another dumb pose.

  So not the goddess of clowns and actors? Not even deception?

  “Huh? Why would I be that?”

  I tried to wrap my head around this situation. Everything I know so far about this chick is real? It's hard to believe…

  So why don't you just kill me? It should be easy for you.

  “So silly! I'm not killing my servant! Although you called me a goddess, so our relationship has gone beyond that. Ah a forbidden act! How naughty of me!” She said as she acted all dramatic and blushed.

  I feel strange, as far as I could tell, this goddess is being genuine. Why does calling her a goddess have such an effect on her?

  “Ugh, silly Cammy, I need to get my shit together!”

  Now she was having a full on monologue with herself. Is it possible that this goddess is lonely? I never considered it, but deities are as faulty as anyone else and not immune to sadness or loneliness.

  I decided to listen to her monologue as I had no clue where I was. I got a vague mana ping back from my connection with Giana after testing to see if I could locate her. It seems I had underestimated charm magic. Just as Giana located me and fished me out of a black hole with this connection, so can I. I just know that she is fine, besides being sealed, that's all. I suppose this connection snaps if her timeline gets rewritten somehow.

  I sighed and paid attention.

  So this goddess was Camilla, a goddess of wealth and spatiotemporal phenomenon, but she was alone in a massive mansion.

  Her brother was the asshole who abducted my team. She seems to dislike him too, but is grateful to him as he had sent her to me. I seem to be the first person in her mansion in a long time. So I was correct in her being alone.

  She had tried recruiting mortals before, and while some agreed, they died of old age, which seemed to have affected her, as she still remembered them and missed them. The reason why her mansion is empty is because she uses inefficient methods to invite people, inefficient for a goddess…

  She nicely asks them, and she will leave when they refuse.

  She was currently holding a monologue on how to persuade me to stay, and she had difficulties finding any good reason for me to stay.

  “But Cammy, his friends, got abducted by my asshole brother. Would you stay if it happened to you and your friends got abducted?” She said with a serious face, turned around and pulled a silly face. “Hmm, you have a good point Camilla I would do anything for my friends if they were still alive…”

  Camilla fell silent and looked at me. I didn't like the look on her face. It was similar to the face Giana made when I got hurt.

  She got out of her corner, stood up and warped me on the bed. “I won't keep you here but…at least heal up and…could you please tell me when you leave?”

  A tear escaped from her eye before she turned around and walked out of the door and gently closed it.

  What to do now? I need to put in effort to ignore her situation. She was slightly entertaining, so I had to curb the feeling of wanting to help out. She was right, though. I need to recover, as I will just get one shot if I fight that asshole like this.

  My tails got put on duty to apply nature energy to me while I was asleep, so I curled up and went for a nap.

  A strong divine presence woke me up, and I uncurled, getting ready for battle but couldn't find anyone. Only Camilla crumpled upside down in a corner.

  What are you doing…

  “I went to check if you left as it had been awhile and…saw the fluffiest thing! It was so soft and I fell asleep.” Camilla fell over and fixed her attire and hair after getting up. “And then it launched me into the wall…”

  My bad…you have a lot of divine energy…it set me off. You must be way stronger than you let on.

  “What's the point of being strong if I will be alone in this mansion forever…are you rested up? I will show you the kitchen and then the exit, as you might get lost.”

  Camilla had lost her energy and goofiness and seemed unhappy.

  This mansion isn't in the gods realm is it?

  “Of course not! The gods realm is a terrible place for people like me.”

  You refer to yourself as a person and not a goddess?

  “Oh my heart!” She collapsed to her knees, clutching her chest.

  At least that hasn't changed…

  “Sorry, I mustn't…” She slapped her cheeks and got back up.

  “I…after having talked to many mortals, I've concluded that I'm more like them than gods. A century of watching TV also further confirmed it. I…I know it sounds arrogant, but I wish I was born a mortal. What is the point of immortality if I am cursed to spend an eternity in loneliness…”

  She dropped her head into her hands and wept.

  I couldn't ignore her now. She was hitting many points I'm familiar with. There was no deception, and besides the divine energy, nothing would suggest that she is a goddess.

  But can I help her? I don't think I can…

  Hey, Camilla. I understand. I won't be able to help or stay but…I might regret this…how about we become friends?

  “What is the point of having you in the friend zone for you to die of old age before I can even blink?!”

  Huh?

  “Huh?” She said as she looked at me and stared.

  She was talking Kaledonian, but I had no idea what she was saying.

  You don't know what race I am?

  I asked while pointing at my tails.

  “A beastkin, life expectancy about 300-400 Kaledonian years. I'm unsure about your subspecies or current age.”

  Ah…maybe it was arrogant to think that every deity knows about us. And what's this friend zone thing? Is it a jail for friends?

  “Uhm…” Camilla acted suspiciously.

  “I peeped into the past and saw how you valiantly protected your friends. I got interested as I wish someone would do the same for me…” She placed her hands on her cheeks and made strange sounds.

  Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  Uhm…I am already taken…

  “I know…lucky them…I'm sorry, my infinite life expectancy makes me a terrible friend for mortals.”

  But I'm not a mortal…

  “Huh?”

  I sighed and gave her a breakdown of the function of mythical beasts.

  She put her hands in her hair in despair. “My stupid brother! What does he think he's doing?!”

  She instantly calmed down. “Wait he isn't thinking, at least not with his head…” She walked over to me and grabbed my hands. “Will you become my immoral friend if I help you free them? He always needed his head to get bashed in, but I was never strong enough to stand up to him!”

  Don't you mean immortal and not immoral?

  “I don't mind getting immoral with you if you want to.” Camilla said happily.

  You are insane but…surprisingly normal. I could use your help. How strong are you compared to him?

  Camilla started to tap her index fingers into each other. “Uhh, well you see…haha. I'm actually stronger, but you know, uh, what I learned from mortals is that strength is useless in the face of experience. So I could overwhelm him, but he would always kick my ass before I got that far. Sorry…”

  This is the first aware and competent deity after Hablena. They are rare, but these are the truly dangerous ones. Camilla doesn't inconvenience mortals or wreak havoc and is aware of her weaknesses. While not optimal, if I had to have a deity help me out, he or she would need to be like this.

  That's fine. I understand your point. It is something I abuse. I might not be stronger than deities but my experience evens the playing field. I will take you up on your offer. I just want to warn you. Abandon me if you're getting to the point of getting sent to the gods realm. I've encountered it once before and while it will serve me well in the future, it was hard to stomach, seeing the work of a deity get invalidated.

  “Invalidated?”

  She was similar to you, or maybe not. She was a malicious god who discovered the joy of hanging around mortals. She became aware of the effect deities have on them and slowly started to oppose her own kin, for selfish reasons but…wanting the world you live in to not turn into shit is a selfish reason I can get behind.

  “So she got sent back after her hard work?”

  Her brother ‘killed' her. She might have truly died if I hadn't aided her by sending her to the gods' realm.

  “I see, you don't want this to happen to me. Thank you.”

  Don't thank me. You have no idea how useful and needed deities like you are. I know that you and Hablena are exceptions and not the rule, but if there are 2…maybe it will be enough to cause a shift.

  This abduction is terrible, but it seems to have a silver lining. If Camilla and Hablena teamed up, it could create a faction of useful goods which will be beneficial for everyone. Not that it matters if I fail to retrieve my friends. I am not kind enough to care what happens to the world if I fail, and they remain strangers to me, forever.

  Hey Camilla, can I call you Cammy?

  “Sure!”

  An important question. What is the temporal flow rate of this mansion compared to the Mainfloor and your brother’s place?

  “Mainfloor? We're on the third floor. What does that have to do with anything? The…” I interrupted her as I realized this isn't common knowledge and explained the dimensional house analogy. “Hmm, never heard of that. I only knew of the ‘human world’ and the gods' realm. So there is a Basement, Attic and a Garden…” Cammy seemed deep in thought. I guess I won't be getting answers from her. “Do you know why deities like to hang around in the human world? I mean Mainfloor?”

  Maybe I was wrong.

  Not really.

  “Short story, it sucks there. Longer story, it really sucks. But jokes aside, it might be because nobody manages it. It all makes sense now. You told me that the tailed beasts are supposed to maintain the whole dimension, right? And not just the Mainfloor right?”

  Cammy’s question made my gears turn.

  If no tailed beast can get to the god's realm and a dimensional tear opens or other bullshit happens. Nobody can fix it…

  Oof, wait, so besides it being full of the deities clashing egos it's also a shithole because no tailed beast has stepped up there in almost forever?

  “I might be wrong, but that could be it. It's a shitty place, nothing makes sense there…its not as pretty as the mortals think as it just looks like the mortal world, maybe a bit worse.”

  Oof that bad eh? Yeah I can understand why they want to hang out here then…

  “So for temporal flow. My brother likes slow flows as it gives him more time to move around and not miss anything, this mansion also has slower time to make mortals live longer but it's not as slow as my brother's place. 3 weeks have passed on the Mainfloor since I got you here, 1 week has passed in this mansion and maybe an hour at his place.”

  I reclined in my tails.

  I see, thank you. About the gods realm and you. Do you have copies of yourself, and what is needed for a deity to return to the Mainfloor?

  “Oh this is my main body! I have 5 copies maintaining the mansion. Gathering divine energy is extremely difficult in the gods realm and our strength determines how fast we get it. Also, the stronger ones need to hit a lower quota. A weak god will be practically be stuck there for millennia but…how did you know about the copies?”

  Not my first tango with gods but…is this wise appearing in front of me with your true self?

  “Nope! I needed to see you myself! My copy wouldn't shut up on how cool you were!”

  What a clown…at least you're honest… can you send a copy with me when we go save my team?

  “Oh and he’s considerate! I'm in heaven! Wait the gods realm is seen as heaven…heaven sucks! I'm in Mainfloor!” She said as she acted like…what was she acting like? It was clear this goddess watched too much tv, but I couldn't place what she was acting like. “Ugh, Cammy, focus! He must be hungry! Come, eh…what was your name?”

  Oh, I'm Agnis.

  “Right! My bad! Come Agnis! My ‘housechore’ copy has prepared some food, after that we will meet with the ‘strategy’ copy to make a plan to kill my brother!"

  Why do you gods like to kill your siblings…

  “That's a good question. I don't know, but he isn't nice to me, mortals or anyone I ever cared for, so I have no attachment to him.” Cammy said as she opened the door and another her came in. They high-fived and the new arrival started to clean up the mess the real body made. “This is ‘Housechore Camilla’, thanks for the cooking!”

  “You're welcome.” Housechore Cammy said as she looked at me with a dreamy expression.

  This…this is going to end up as a circus isn't it…

  I gave housechore Cammy a polite nod, who turned red and fainted. Her head crashed into a cupboard, shattering it. It looked painful, but she is a deity

  I guess I was right…

  The real body and I ignored the passed out copy and walked through corridors made of black stone. Red regal carpets and curtains decorated the floor and walls, and various golden objects were on display.

  This chick had good taste.

  She pushed open 2 heavy doors and revealed an enormous dining hall with an enormous table with numerous chairs.

  The room was empty and only a small portion of the table had food on it and only 2 sets of plates and cutlery had been prepared. The room screamed loneliness, as it was unlikely that the majority of these seats had been occupied in a long time. We sat down and ate in silence. I didn't understand the food as I didn't recognize anything but it tasted great.

  Cammy suddenly started talking. A waterfall of words streamed out. Probably things she always wanted to say but had nobody to talk to. I did my best to not tune out as it wasn't a conversation, she just wanted to talk. My tails got the duty of archiving whatever she said. I just ate and nodded.

  We would make a plan to fight that asshole after this, but do we stand a chance? Cammy suggested that she loses quite easily against her brother.

  Is he even her brother? What if he rewrote her timeline too? There is no way I could tell. Is that true, though? I had determined that every timeline has its own number in Boshi town but…

  I compared my timeline number with the current timeline number. They didn't match because our Boshi town shenanigans. I never took note of the idols’ timeline number, and it wouldn't be strange for a spatiotemporal goddess to also have a mismatch in those numbers.

  I could return my friends to the timeline number that matches mine, but what of the idols? Do they have a number matching mine or the current timeline? Or is theirs completely different? Giana is a 9t so that's not impossible…

  Of course! Giana is unaffected! She should still have her timeline number.

  Hopping into another timeline keeps your timeline number the same. Is it possible that he exchanged my team?

  Is that possible? I don't know. I never found out what happened to the me who was supposed to be in this timeline. Maybe we swapped places or…we created a paradox. What if the Agnis Hourai with this timeline number was stuck in Hourai. Our parents wouldn't look for us as we never left…

  But what about Giana, Yv and Noelle? They should at least come and look for them.

  More questions, no answers. I have to ask Giana what happened to them when we were stuck in Boshi town’s bullshit. It is possible that Boshi town is the single most important event that has ever happened to us, as it is still not done with us.

  “Whew, that felt great to get off my chest. Thank you for listening.”

  My tail gave me an ‘ok’ to indicate that it caught everything she just said. It started to filter out anything that could be of an immediate concern.

  Something popped up. She had mentioned that she had been very busy after the Great Calamity as a swarm of fairies wiped out the village of a woman she tried to recruit to her mansion. She retaliated in revenge and went on a warpath to eradicate as many as possible as the woman was about to agree but declined after hearing that her village got destroyed.

  Cammy vented on the fairies for 5 months. She might have contributed to their drastic decline in population.

  Household Cammy came in to clean up the table.

  Hey are you alright? You hit your head quite hard when you fainted earlier.

  She blushed and rushed to clean up and dropped some plates.

  Hey is your copy alright?

  “Don't worry! We're fine!”

  We got up and walked through more corridors and ended up in a strange room. “My mansion is enormous, so it's time for some warping! You may hold on to me or carry me princess style if you're anxious!” She said, with a lot of energy.

  So I was right…you are a clown. Those jokes are quite convincing.

  “Meh, didn't work? Maybe next time.” Cammy twirled, the room glowed dark purple, and it whiffed. It even made a sound of a machine powering down.

  Truly a clown…aren't you a goddess? Why are you using an outdated piece of warping junk?

  “Oh yes! I will be your goddess! Feed me more praise and attention!” I flicked her forehead as she approached me with her lips pursed. “Ow!”

  You know I've noticed but…no immortal I've ever met is normal…maybe it's to be expected…

  “I don't want to be normal! The average deity sucks!”

  Fair point, please warp us normally…