“Inhale,” Tamiyo said. “Hold.” Her voice was a soothing guide through the meditation. “Exhale. Let it stretch.”

  He pushed his breath out, holding it.

  “Reach for stillness—in both body and mind,” Tamiyo said calmly.

  They sat atop an observation spire above The Resolute Wind’s pavilion. On one side, a railing looked down over the open relaxation area. On another, a large window was installed where they could look out on the expanse of space, observing the stars and nebulae of the passing cosmos.

  Soren found it helped quiet his mind.

  They both sat cross-legged, backs straight, facing each other. Soren's palms rested on his knees. Tamiyo's hands were gently clasped in her lap. His eyes were closed while hers were open, scanners active, analyzing his responses to the session.

  “You've been taking some hard hits on these missions,” Tamiyo noted.

  “Nothing that could keep me down,” he responded, keeping his eyes shut.

  “Any manifestation of your powers? Did the glow stick show up?”

  “No,” he shook his head. “I took a harder hit on Lauriam than I did on Orryx, but I stayed calm. Tore my armor to hell, though.”

  “That's good!” her voice perked up. “You're gaining some control then.”

  “Yes…”

  She was right, but he still felt so unsure, so wary of the energy that roiled inside him.

  “Let's do a more formal, guided session,” Tamiyo said. “Picture the ball of light once more.”

  He took a deep breath. “I see it. Silvery-green wrapped in shards of gold, like curved prison bars holding it in. It’s… dim. Like a star behind a thousand feet of water.”

  “Good. That is the source of your power, but it does not define you. You were adrift for a long time, Soren. We must restore the bond not just with those around you, but with yourself.”

  She scooted forward and pulled out a thin cable from her wrist, then attached a sensor pad to the end. “Is it alright if I do some additional diagnostics?”

  He nodded without a word.

  She placed the sensor pad on his temple. After several moments, she said, “The Aether Dust flows through your body much like energy flows through a circuit, or water through a creek. Coming to terms with the turmoil of emotion inside you will help you stabilize it and control it. Let's start with fear. What are you most afraid of?”

  Soren was quiet for a long time as he thought, his breaths growing shallow. “I’m afraid of what I am. I never asked for this power, it's both great and terrible. Strong and painful. I'm afraid of what might happen if I lose control.”

  Tamiyo's voice was calm and soothing when she responded. “That is the valid fear of a man, but you are not just a man anymore. You cannot exile yourself from your own life. Surrender those fears and let them flow away. Your strength is not a curse unless you allow it to be.”

  Soren's shoulders rose and fell as he took a deep breath. He wasn't sure if he had done what she asked, but he did feel a little lighter.

  “Next we will deal with feelings of pleasure,” Tamiyo said.

  Soren opened his eyes. “Is this something you're alright discussing?”

  Tamiyo's expression dropped from clinical to something else. It wasn't sad, not for herself, but more touched at his show of concern. “It is true that I suffered… indignities. But I am first and foremost a caretaker. Thank you for checking, now close your eyes.”

  A small smirk touched his lips and he did as she asked.

  “Pleasure is often blocked by guilt,” she continued. “The lacravida are creatures of pleasure, and you are surrounded by them. What guilt burdens you?”

  “Klix. Kasey.” He grimaced as his voice cracked. “Jory. Thorsul and Thamdir every time I see them in their father's face. I killed them.”

  “You must accept the reality that these things happened,” Tamiyo said firmly, “but do not let them cloud and poison your energy. A single drop of rain will not quench your thirst, and a single moment of failure does not define your worth. If you are to be a positive influence on this world, you need to forgive yourself.”

  “Easier said than done,” he said in a shaky voice. “But I will… try.”

  “For now, that is all you can do,” she responded. “Next we will deal with willpower and shame. What are your biggest disappointments in yourself?”

  His face twisted into a snarl. “That I was so blind to what the Professor was capable of. That I failed, and the price was… everything. I was weak.”

  “No,” Tamiyo countered. “You were a soldier, first following orders and later, your instincts. Your own compass told you what was good and moral and decent, even in the middle of war.”

  “I betrayed everything I knew growing up.”

  “You chose to act with humanity instead of becoming a monster, just as you must do now.”

  “How many times must I learn this lesson?” Soren spat in anger.

  She didn’t shy away. “There are no painless lessons. Sacrifices are necessary. You will never find balance if you deny that part of your life. And as we saw in Altina, your willpower, when channeled hard enough, can bend reality to your whim. Do not let shame burn away your will. Use it as fuel. Refine it. You are primordial cosmic fire, Soren. Burn the impurities from your soul.”

  Soren took another deep breath, and for a long time, he didn't speak. Neither of them did. Finally, he peeked one eye open and asked, “How are you so fuckin’ wise? Aren't you like six?”

  She shrugged with a playful smirk. “Seven. Though I was designed to look mid-twenties.”

  “Still,” Soren opened both eyes, “a lot of experience inside your little blonde head.”

  “A lot of hard, painful lessons,” she nodded, but she sounded resolute when she said it, not sad or defeated. “I think that is enough for today. How do you feel?”

  “Better,” Soren said, the word feeling more true than he expected. “Thank you.”

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  “Good,” she smiled wide, her scanners blinking out to be replaced by genuine warmth. “Wanna go get some coffee?”

  Soren tilted just a little to one side, spying at least two empty cups sitting on the deck behind her. She tilted with him, attempting to obscure his sight from what he was pretty sure was a third.

  “How much have you had today?” He asked, one eyebrow raised.

  “Unimportant,” she answered flatly, her antennae twitching. Then she quickly bounced up to her feet. He chuckled and pushed himself up, then they moved into the elevator, descending down to the pavilion.

  “Come on,” she said as soon as the doors opened. She grabbed his hand and pulled him out. “There’s a place up here that makes it almost as good as Brolgar.”

  As they approached the vendor stall, its rich aroma already filling Soren’s nose, she casually said, “I have a question.”

  “Sure, what’s up?”

  “Well, I’m curious how you view me. Just a general vibe check-in, I guess.”

  “Uh,” Soren thought it over as they walked. “Well, definitely friends. But I’d say more than that. But obviously not in a romantic way.” He glanced down at her. “So… like the little sister I never had?”

  A bright smile lit up her whole face. “I like that.” Then, after a moment, she curiously asked, “I take it you were an only child, then?”

  “Yeah,” he answered flatly.

  “Did you ever want a sibling?”

  “Hmm,” he said, pausing as the scent of coffee grew stronger. “Maybe. Hard to remember. I use the term sister because it feels right, but I can’t say for sure I know how siblings are supposed to act around each other.”

  “Well,” her tone turned analytical again as they reached the counter. “I believe there’s a foundational affection that is generally displayed through mutual, often performative, annoyance.” She turned to the vendor and ordered her extravagant coffee, a complex concoction of shots, syrups, and foam. When she was done, she thrust a thumb towards Soren and said, “Oh, and whatever he wants.”

  Soren watched as the vendor set the freshly prepared, steaming cup of caffeine in front of Tamiyo. He contemplated the performative annoyance she had just mentioned. Then he reached out and grabbed the coffee right before her fingers could close around it. The light in her eyes died a little.

  He took a slow sip. The brew was shockingly strong, but he committed to his act of brotherly betrayal, and said, “This one’s good.” Then he turned on his heel and walked away from the stall.

  He heard her yell, “Bruh!” in a voice a full octave lower than she normally spoke. A moment later, he heard her frantically ordering another, even more complicated drink. When she stormed up to him holding her new concoction, she was glaring annoyed daggers at him. “Guess I kinda set myself up for that one.”

  “Yep,” he shrugged. “How are you paying for all this anyway?”

  “Well, I keep bumming money off Raine,” Tamiyo answered casually. “And I’m fairly certain she’s bumming it off Inelius or Riza. I don’t know. Raine is the go-to person if you need something, so I go to her when I need money.”

  “Which is what—eleven times a day?”

  “Shut up and drink your stolen coffee.”

  He grinned and enjoyed the hot brew in silence for several minutes. They walked without a destination, simply enjoying the quiet moment. As they passed a cluster of off-duty personnel, they both overheard a lazarco with a dusty, sand-colored hide saying to his friend, “I wonder if the little ponds around here have any fish in them. Would be nice to just sit and watch for a bit.”

  “Aren’t those ponds like, two feet deep at most?” Tamiyo muttered once they were out of earshot.

  “Yeah, but don’t shatter his dreams,” Soren said. “Sounds like he really hopes there are fish in them. Probably misses fishing.”

  After that, they wandered aimlessly, browsing the few shops set up for LU personnel.

  Tamiyo bought him a black baseball cap and a pair of dark sunglasses in a futile attempt at allowing him to move around incognito and he bought her a ridiculously large, wide-brimmed sun hat (using money he borrowed from her). Then they found a small vendor selling tiny fish, presumably as aquatic pets. They were no bigger than his thumb, with iridescent scales that shimmered like oil on water. They reminded Soren of goldfish back on Earth.

  His eyes snapped to Tamiyo. “You thinkin’—”

  “Yep,” she cut him off immediately.

  They bought a single fish in a water-filled plastic bag and hurried back to where they had overheard the lazarco. It took a while of searching, and Soren was beginning to grow worried he had gone back to duty and they’d never find him. Then, he spotted the sand-colored hide walking away from one of the ponds.

  Soren tried to get Tamiyo’s attention, hissing her name louder and louder, but she was a hundred feet away, deep in an intense interrogation with a coffee vendor about the lazarco's whereabouts while simultaneously ordering another brew. He looked around for something to throw, his eyes landing on a nearby table where a crewman had just finished a meal.

  "Excuse me," Soren said, "can I borrow the tinfoil your food came in?"

  The crewman gave him a deeply skeptical look but shrugged and said, "Uh, sure."

  Soren balled it up tight and hurled it. The foil sailed through the air and bounced squarely off the side of Tamiyo’s head. Her head slowly turned, brow furrowed with an expression that was trying to deduce who the hell had the audacity to throw something at her. When their eyes locked, he exaggerated a gesture towards the lazarco, who was just about to disappear around a bend.

  Her eyes widened, and she quickly paid the vendor. She grabbed her coffee and the fish bag, and they both scurried after the target. They followed at a distance until he began passing one of the shallow ponds.

  “We need a distraction,” Soren whispered.

  Tamiyo looked up at him, then shoved her coffee into his hand. She opened the bag, plunged her hand in, and cocked her arm back, putting her entire body into throwing the fish. It landed in the pond with a loud GLOOSH, and the lazarco immediately froze, his eyes snapping to the water.

  He approached the edge and sat on the low wall, watching the fish swim around in lazy circles. His eyes were soft, and he had a wondrous little smile on his face. After a moment, he looked up and around, as if wondering if he was being watched.

  Soren was hiding behind a very large plant, his black hat and sunglasses on for good measure. Tamiyo had taken a dive behind a bush. When the lazarco finally went back to watching his fish, the two of them scampered away.

  As they meandered at a lazy pace back toward the elevator that would take them to their quarters, Soren said, "Those meditation techniques you used felt pretty mystical. Did you come up with them yourself, or was that from what Elias sent you?"

  "A bit of a combination," she answered. "He sent me the foundational stuff—chakra theory, emotional blockages. But I had a whole sermon I could have rattled off about cosmic energy and the illusion of separation. It felt a bit on the nose."

  "What do you mean?"

  She cocked an eyebrow up at him as she fell back into the calm, coaching tone of their session. "The greatest illusion is that you are alone in your pain. Open your mind. Everything is connected. You emit light, Soren. What shadows do you cast?"

  He chuckled warmly. "Okay, I see what you mean. Still, it's an interesting question. It reminds me of an old concept from Earth."

  "What would that be?"

  "Komorebi."

  Her antennae bounced once. "That was... Japanese?"

  "Yes," Soren nodded. "The literal meaning was ‘sunlight filtering through trees.’ It described the beauty of light rays piercing through overhead leaves, casting dancing shadows on the forest floor. But it was more than just that. It was about the feeling it gave you, and the moments of life, the bright spots, that would evoke a similar feeling.”

  "What a beautiful concept," Tamiyo said softly.

  "It is," Soren agreed. "Which is why I found it interesting that you asked about what shadows I cast. Shadows are usually seen as something dark or bad. But with Komorebi, the shadows are part of the beauty. You can't have the light without them."

  Tamiyo was quiet for a moment, processing. Then she said, "If you are the light, then the lacravida are the trees. The way they act around you—their reactions, their tension, even their friendship—those are the shadows."

  Soren gently nudged her shoulder. "Not just the lacravida. I never would have made nearly as much progress as I have without you." He looked ahead. "Elias, too. And Inelius is great. Raine too. Brana..." He paused, his smile fading a little. "Brolgar—even though he basically still hates me." He shrugged, lost in thought.

  "Hmm," Tamiyo said. "A forest of different sized trees, then."

  "Well, there are like a dozen of us," Soren noted. "Not really a forest."

  "Grove," Tamiyo stated robotically. "Noun. A small group of trees."

  A laugh escaped him. "Copse," he offered playfully.

  "Thicket," she countered instantly.

  "Orchard."

  "Ooh!" Tamiyo perked up. She took a long pull from her cup, draining the last traces of liquid caffeine. "I wonder if we can find a place that has apple flavoring for their coffee."