Chapter 51

  Ben spent the rest of his Sunday running errands.

  He went grocery shopping, did his laundry, prepped his meals, cleaned his room, and many other menial tasks he wanted to complete so he didn’t have to think about them during the week. He kept moving from one thing to the next, barely stopping, as if slowing down might give his thoughts time to catch up with him.

  By the time his family got home, Ben was walking up from the basement with a basket of folded clothes in his arms. His mother took off her head covering and frowned.

  “Benjamin, don’t tell me you have been running around all day?”

  Ben was still in his church clothes, except for his shoes.

  Ben smiled at her.

  “Better to do it now than spend time during the week. I am going to be too busy to do this kind of stuff later.”

  She frowned.

  “At least let me help. It won’t take that much more time for me to do your laundry, help you with meals, and—”

  “Absolutely not. He is a grown man. He needs to practice being responsible for himself.”

  Ben’s father made himself known. He walked into the room with a stern expression. Ben’s mother helped him take off his coat before her own. She looked upon her husband with a sweet gaze while undoing his tie.

  “The Lord’s Day is supposed to be a day of rest,” she said.

  The man’s gaze softened upon his wife.

  “Spiritual rest,” he clarified. “Had he not spent his Saturday playing that game, he could have finished all this already.”

  “Honey—”

  “Dad is right,” Ben said.

  The words came out faster than he meant them to, like he wanted to cut the conversation short before it turned into something else.

  He was already halfway up the stairs, moving toward his room.

  Diane looked back at Ben with a frown, but she didn’t stop him.

  When Ben rounded the corner, the woman’s face dropped further.

  “I am worried about him, Stephen.”

  Stephen grew a look of deep concern.

  “I am as well. That’s why we can’t coddle him. He is a man now. The best medicine is work. He needs to stay busy until he can get through whatever he’s going through.”

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  Diane looked up at Stephen in surprise.

  “You noticed too?”

  He nodded.

  “How could I not?” Stephen said in a somber tone. “Give him time. If we really need to step in, we’ll know.”

  Diane laid her head against Stephen’s chest. He wrapped his arms securely around her.

  “I pray you are right.”

  Stephen nodded.

  “I pray for that every day.”

  Their intimate moment was interrupted by joyful laughter from outside.

  “Michael, you know you aren’t supposed to ride your bike on the lawn.”

  “But Dad hasn’t cut it yet. It’s just going to be fixed soon anyway.”

  “Michael!”

  Diane and Stephen exchanged loving glances.

  “You’d better get out there before Victoria blows a gasket.”

  “Of course, my love.”

  Ben sat at his desk scribbling notes in a notebook while looking back and forth between the pages of an open Bible. A quiet buzz caught his attention. He grabbed his vibrating phone and checked the notification.

  [Your friend Eve has logged into Eternity]

  Ben smiled warmly at the notification. The smile lingered longer than he expected. He set his phone face down and returned to his Bible study, though he had to reread the same passage twice before it stuck.

  Another buzz grabbed his attention again. Ben considered silencing his phone, but he checked the notification one last time.

  “I have a little extra time tonight if you want to do some grinding before bed,” the message read.

  Ben seriously contemplated it. He looked back at the gaming helmet on his bed, then back at his Bible.

  The choice was harder than he imagined. Harder because neither option felt wrong. Finally, he began to type.

  “Let’s hit the sheets early tonight, then we can get up early in the morning. How does 5 a.m. sound?”

  There was a small pause before Ben received a response.

  “Ok. Have a good night.”

  “Have a good night, Eve.”

  [Player Eve has logged out of Eternity]

  Ben chuckled softly.

  “She really doesn’t want to play without me. Cute,” he thought.

  The thought filled him with an unexpectedly satisfying warmth.

  Ben finished his Bible study soon after. After a shower, he got ready for bed. When he turned off his room lights, he noticed the small flash of his phone. It no longer vibrated, given that he put it on Silence Mode, but the brief flash was enough to get his attention.

  He lay down and checked the message, already feeling a faint, unwelcome tension in his chest.

  “Goodnight, Ben.”

  Sarah.

  Ben froze upon reading that message. She never sent that kind of message. It just wasn’t her thing. That alone was enough to make his stomach sink.

  He contemplated not responding. In that brief moment, whatever peace he had was tossed into chaos. He lost track of how much time he lay in bed, staring into the darkness. Sarah’s teary, needy gaze seared into his mind.

  If he really wanted to move on from her, he shouldn’t indulge her. He even contemplated blocking her. The thought made his chest tighten.

  His thumb hovered over the Block button. Only for a second. It felt heavier than it should have.

  “Goodnight, Sarah. Sleep well.”

  He stayed up for a while longer, contemplating that simple reply and what it meant. Was he too weak to move on, too cruel to push her away and give her so little? Did he keep her too close? Too far?

  He fell asleep without knowing the answer.

  Sarah read the message with tears of agony and joy flowing down her cheek. She had laid in bed, staring at her phone obsessively until she received that message. Once she did, she released a shuddering breath and hugged the phone to her chest. She whispered to herself with a trembling voice.

  “Thank you.”