Chapter 246

  Legends and Myths (IV)

  The woman certainly knew how to make an entrance; I'll give her that.

  She also derailed my plans entirely, as there is no way I can use the tortoise right now. Its existence is one of my biggest secrets, and I'm not even sure it would work on her, as I've no idea what her realm is. Regardless... maybe there's a peaceful way out of this?

  "Sir Lady," okay, that just sounds wrong. "You must understand that we cannot let his words slide."

  "He did speak out of turn, but only because he was fearful; did we not all do certain untoward things in the moments of despair? Perhaps find the strength in your hearts to forgive the little child."

  Again.

  Honestly, being called a child was pissing me off.

  I heard a snicker from the back and just knew it was that bastard alchemist. He was here with us, too, though he seemed entirely disinterested in helping with the affair. He did say, after all, he wouldn't really fight for me, though, to be honest, I am perfectly happy with that.

  "It wasn't merely speaking out of turn, Sir Lady; he dishonored us to our faces. If we do not receive a recompense, our Dao Hearts will never calm."

  "Can you not offer me a little bit of face?"

  "We have offered you plenty already," huh. Why do I suddenly have a bad feeling about all of this? "Not only has your negligence caused the death of many of our Disciples, you are now attempting to prevent us from exercising proper justice. The question is, do you not treat us as wind, Sir Lady? Or do you take our Lands as nothing more than playthings?"

  "... what recompense, exactly, are you seeking?" She seemed to take a step back, but I didn't really buy it.

  "As to give you face," the same guy kept talking. "We only seek that he ruin his cultivation, break his limbs, and renounce being Master of the children. That way, he can still live out the remainder of his life, at least."

  Wow.

  What grace.

  So forgiving.

  Honestly, if I were any stronger, I'd have leapt over there and literally ripped his tongue out so he'd shut up.

  "Little friend," she turned toward me, smiling. "What say you of those conditions?"

  "They can take them up their fat--"

  "--there is a middle ground here, friends," she interrupted me rather quickly. "You must understand that your conditions are... unacceptable."

  If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

  "Do you wish to see this city ravaged, Sir Lady? As the might of the Holy Lands descends upon it, will you still be seeking middle ground? Or begging for your life?" Wow. Honestly, I thought Long Tao was plenty arrogant, but compared to this guy, Long Tao is the friendliest guy alive.

  "That may well happen," she said, still smiling. "But you will not leave this city alive in that scenario. You lot certainly do often pride yourselves on your Sects, so, perhaps, you are finally willing to sacrifice your lives for the cause."

  Well, that shut them up for a little while.

  None of this mattered to me, though; the question was... why was this woman helping me? She wasn't doing it out of the goodness of her heart, no chance in hell. Which meant she'll want something, too.

  I can already venture a guess that it's not me, but these little gremlins behind me.

  Haah.

  I really, really wanted to turn around and throw a big picture frame at Long Tao and call him stupid, but it was too late for that. Instead of wallowing, I just have to somehow get out of this. Maybe I can instigate them to break out into a fight?

  Nah. I don't think it would be so much a fight as it'd be a major ass-whooping that would last a few seconds, tops.

  ... there's no way out.

  No, seriously.

  I can't think of a way out outside of relying on Lao or maybe Long Tao to think of something. Even if my little tortoise worked on her, would she attack me with an art strong enough? I seriously doubt it. She's already heard me curse and spit, so she wouldn't be nearly as shocked and would instead probably find it closer to cute than agitating.

  "Hah. Good, good, good," there's that patented, pissed-off repetition of 'Good'. "You certainly have revealed your true colors today, Sir Lady. Very well. What middle ground are you seeking?"

  "If you swear Oaths to never divulge what happened here, or any information about any of them, I shall offer you a Mythical Artifact from my personal treasury."

  "...!"

  There were quite a few gasps and exclamations, including from the old Lao, though I remained silent and still. Not that I wasn't vaguely aware of just how big of a deal it was, but because it drove my suspicion up even more.

  It was precisely because of how rare it was that it has me reeling. If she's offering that for them to bugger off, what in God's name will she want from me?!

  Hoooh, this is not good.

  "... and how exactly do you expect us to indulge in that generous gift, Sir Lady? Do you expect us to enter a free-for-all as soon as we leave the city?" Yeah, probably. "There will be no swearing of Oaths, I'm afraid. That cretin must suffer, at least by becoming a cripple, though, as a show of our generosity, you may take one child under your wing and make them your Disciple."

  There's nothing quite as loathsome as watching people barter in front of you about something to do with you. It's like I'm not here, or I have no say in any of it, and that I should just make my peace with whatever-the-hell they decide to do.

  I'm weak, sure, and I know better than to try and butt in... but, one day (I hope), I will be strong. If I ever behave like this, I'd hope one of the kids would punt me in the back of my head with a really, really big book.

  This is just outright pathetic, to be honest.

  These people are, at the very least, hundreds of years old. No... perhaps it is expected; they're so desensitized to life and death that our existence means nothing more than a potential payout.

  Honestly, I'd have respected them far more if they just outright attacked us instead of even bothering to pretend with this nonsense. If you're gonna be a shitty hypocrite, at least do so with some level of pride, for the love of God. Whatever this is?

  A joke.

  That's all it is.

  A joke.

  "Looks like we have arrived at an impasse," the woman said, still smiling, though now it appeared strained.

  "Are you truly willing to jeopardize your relationship with the Holy Lands over some nobodies, Sir Lady? I took you for a much wiser woman."

  "... hm. You're right," she said. "I am wise."

  "Good. You have finally come--"

  "--in your next life, learn to keep your damn mouth shut."

  Heads exploded into a shower of blood and gore, and there was sudden silence before the bodies toppled over like a very macabre symphony.

  Just like that.

  She killed them, just like that.

  Yo.

  What the hell, lady?!