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65: Modicum of Kindness

  Lucian could still remember quite well the first time that he realized the player could freely trek through the Hells. The first trek had been an experience like nothing else. Considering the constant fog of war around the whole map, exploring the Hells at all felt like a glitch, like something forbidden. The darkness provided an eerie atmosphere—it was different than a cave, because caves had ceilings. Here, the darkness was the sky.

  Nothing was known about this place. No one the player knew could give guidance. Lucian hadn’t looked anything up, but even if he had, information was scarce. The player travelled in free roam mode with encounters in certain areas. The enemies were all bizarre and insanely strong, though generally gave poor rewards, excepting a few very unique cases. War of Four didn’t hold the player’s hand at all in the Hells. Maybe that first experience was why he eventually came to love it so much in other ways.

  Once the mystique was pulled away, it was more accurate to think of it like another planet rather than a mystical realm. Per the lore, the Hells had a civilization of their own, but the place that they were in was one of the frontiers. They wouldn’t be able to find any towns or villages for a long way—and even then, they weren’t ‘towns’ in the conventional sense. There were no rivers. There weren’t any trees or plants, no agriculture. It was more comparable to Mars or the Moon, though the geography was varied enough by virtue of the fact that demons lived here.

  With Belcourt’s golems on their tail, Lucian had to take less conventional paths. And by less conventional, he meant dangerous. But chemicals could be dangerous, too, and so long as chemists took proper safety precautions… everything turned out fine. Mostly.

  First, Lucian took them through the Canyons of the Bone Worms. Most canyons were made by natural erosion—this one was made by gargantuan demons that burrowed through the earth, time and time again, in predictable paths. And they still did burrow through here. Lucian knew their behavior, and he knew how to manipulate them into going where he wanted. The problem, however, arose elsewhere.

  Aurelia breathed heavily in panic as one of the gargantuan white worms burrowed past them, its thousands of cracking mandibles eating through the dirt with ease. Her breathing was labored, she sweated, she trembled… she looked simply terrified. Lucian couldn’t exactly blame her for freaking out—he had, too, and that was when it’d been a game. As it turned out, her fear was the least of the problems she exhibited.

  Frankly, Aurelia was hopeless.

  He took her over the sand dunes—she fell multiple times, tumbling down sandy hills. At first he thought she was trying to trick him, but it really was just a skill issue. When they came to rocky terrain, she kept twisting her ankle. And whenever danger appeared, Lucian refused to unseal her Mentor’s Seal. Without her divine beast form she was beyond timid—shivering, delaying, cowering. He had to practically pull her along at times. He thought the biggest obstacle would be impeding her craftiness, but instead it was handling her uselessness.

  She hasn’t done a damn day of hard work in her life, Lucian realized. Whenever any challenge comes up, she can probably transform into a divine beast and make it all go away. Her entire life, that’s been the crutch that she’s relying upon. Not to mention all of the other monastics probably did what little hard work there was for her.

  There was no denying it was a tough hike, but Lucian felt fine. His stats had upgraded substantially. Comparatively, without transforming, Aurelia was incredibly fragile. She’d been more pampered than a princess. Eventually, when Lucian stopped for a break in a cavern after a long while…

  Aurelia stared at her hand. There was a fairly nasty cut, and her nail was bruised. Lucian drank his water and ate his salted fish in silence. She started to sniffle, as if she was trying not to cry. Lucian couldn’t help but laugh.

  “Saw you fake crying in front of all those monastics. Save it,” Lucian said dismissively.

  Aurelia sniffed again, then wiped her face. “I’m not faking anything.”

  “Saw you take an ice lance from Vivari. Metterand hurt you bad, too,” Lucian reminded her.

  “I barely feel pain in that form,” Aurelia said, her throat choked. “And I always get healed before transforming back.”

  Lucian took another drink of water. “Well, suffer.”

  Aurelia looked at him. “Why must you treat me so abominably?”

  Lucian chewed on his salted cod in silence for a long while. Eventually, he swallowed and said simply, “Even if you’ve already forgotten, I never will.”

  Aurelia sniffed deeply. “Putting your feelings aside, is it not sensible to treat me with some modicum of kindness, so that I might have more incentive to take your side?”

  Lucian looked at her. He scoffed, lip upturned in contempt. “You have no shame,” he said, voice low and quiet. “I watched Abbess Dorothea cry to spare your life. I shook the hands of thousands that were beyond grateful I spared your life. They loved you, respected you, admired you. And you looked them in the eye, and you spit on that love.” He shook his head. “Modicum of kindness… please. You spit on kindness. It didn’t work on you before. And here you are, all wrapped up in yourself once again.”

  Aurelia wiped her face. “You don’t know the full story.”

  “I do. People tried to kill you when you were young. Little civil war in the monastery,” he said, and Aurelia looked at him with wide eyes. “Assassination attempts, people spilling their blood to try and end you because of the prophecy. But you lived. People protected you, because you were an innocent child—well, if you ever were innocent. And how did you repay your protectors? Enslavement.” He took another drink of water. “You live without conscience, without compunction. Don’t tell me to have any regard toward you, because you didn’t have any toward them.”

  “If devils whispered in your ears since the day you were born, you would’ve done the same,” Aurelia insisted. “They were always there, always with me. They inhabited my every dream. The only time I’ve ever been without the devil on my shoulder… it’s been since I got that tattoo. You think I have no shame? You provided me clarity for the first time in my life.”

  Lucian laughed, then muffled the noise in his sleeve. “God, listen to you… you just hop from one lie to the next, like a cockroach fleeing the boot. I know for a fact you enjoy killing, violence,” Lucian said. “Don’t bother denying it.”

  “I don’t. They told me I would. The only people I’ve ever actually killed have been at your direction,” Aurelia said as if pointing out his hypocrisy. “Do you think I would have been able to retain my holy affinity had I done otherwise?”

  “I know what you’re capable of. I’ve seen it for myself, many times,” Lucian said, uncaring if that gave her a hint as to what he was. “I don’t care about arbitrary measurements of good. You’re a psychopath. Conveniently, being good was in your benefit.”

  Aurelia sniffed, then swallowed. “Can’t someone change?”

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  “Even if you do change, that doesn’t mean you deserve forgiveness.” Lucian swirled around his waterskin, staring off into the distance. He started to grind his teeth. “You had everything I ever wanted. You had a mother that would choose you before the world. You had friends that admire you, respect you, want the best for you. Hell, they’d die for you. You had the best support group I could’ve ever asked for. You had every damn thing on the list of my perfect life, yet you were so wrapped up in yourself you’d burn all that to the ground just to ward away death.”

  Aurelia held his gaze for a time… but eventually hung her head, as if conceding.

  “If you want to change… tell those people the truth,” Lucian said, and Aurelia looked back at him. “Go to Heavenwatch Monastery. Go to those people who hang on your every word and tell them everything.” Her jaw tightened. “Tell them you were going to seal their powers. Tell them you were going to delude them into thinking you were curing them, only to turn them into demonic beasts.” He paused for a bit, waiting for her response. “No? Not eager to do that? I thought not. No doubt you’ve done the right thing often. But when have you ever done the right thing when it didn’t benefit you, Aurelia? Kindness… don’t make me laugh.” He looked away from her. “Until you've done that, don't even talk to me about change.”

  Aurelia went silent after that, beyond the occasional sniffle. Lucian had time to eat his meal in peace. He finished it quickly, and then rose. Lucian prepared to set off along the path again.

  “If I promise to do whatever you want, will you treat me with less contempt?” Aurelia asked him.

  “The contempt will never go away, I assure you. Besides, we already had this conversation. Do you remember what I told you?” He looked down at her as she sat.

  “You suggested I hang myself with a belt,” Aurelia said. “Then… from this point on, if I’m always on your side, if I never argue with you, if I do everything you even suggest…”

  Lucian laughed at her persistence. “Why do you care so much if I treat you poorly?”

  “Because I do,” Aurelia said simply. “Someone treating you as if you’re the scum of the earth… wouldn’t it bother you?”

  “Funny. People do treat me like the scum of the earth,” Lucian said dryly.

  “And does it bother you?” she repeated.

  Lucian looked into her eyes, considering her angle. Insulting Aurelia wasn’t necessarily part of his hierarchy of needs—perhaps self-actualization, but that was pushing it. He berated her because he wanted to, nothing more. Was this part of some long game? Was she trying to establish a deeper rapport by changing the way he talked to her? It was a kind of deep psychological manipulation that Aurelia might be capable of. Mental conditioning.

  But… if she genuinely does cooperate much more easily… it’s only beneficial to me, Lucian thought. Does she want to deepen my dependence on her? Is that what this is about? I don’t know… but if I’m vigilant, then surely it can only benefit me.

  “Whatever, fine,” Lucian sighed. “It’s just words. If you go back on this, I will too.”

  “Then… please?” Aurelia asked, holding out her injured hand.

  Lucian rolled her eyes, then quickly cast healing magic on the wound. She smiled, and then sighed in relief. He turned and walked onward, shaking his head.

  I’ll just bully her without words until she breaks the promise, Lucian decided. Can’t ever trust her.

  But… there was a rather pressing problem he had.

  “Help me come up with a reason for why Miriam and I abandoned the Student Ambassadors,” Lucian said. “We’re almost out.”

  “Really?” Aurelia said with excitement.

  She picked up the pace, but while jogging to catch up with him hit her foot on a rock and faceplanted. Lucian started to wonder if it was an act to make him pity her. He decided not to help her up, acting like he hadn’t seen her fall.

  ***

  They emerged out of the Hells, walking out from a basement in an abandoned house. Lucian wore a hood, goggles, and a mask. Aurelia followed just after him.

  “…why are you wearing that?”

  “Disguise,” Lucian said. “So that if anyone spots me, they won’t recognize me.”

  Aurelia looked confused. “Why didn’t you wear it to begin with if it was a disguise?”

  “Because I thought that somehow, the woman with the prosthetic leg who’s my closest ally was a pretty good lead for finding me,” Lucian said. “None of those things in there were intelligent anyway, besides Vivari.”

  “Is it safe?” Aurelia asked.

  After a while, Lucian nodded. Aurelia ran out and collapsed in the grass, spreading her arms wide and looking up at the stars while laughing gleefully. Her relief seemed genuine enough. He hadn’t exposed her to true danger, not really, but he understood that feeling. The Hells were intense. He’d nearly run out of night-vision potions.

  That was… good, Lucian reflected. Very good. A little bit of a bumpy ride at the end there, but nothing that couldn’t be overcome. If Aurelia’s advice works out… this could be my best move yet.

  “We should get out of here quickly. No telling when Belcourt might send goons out of there,” he reflected, looking back.

  Aurelia sat up. “We can get to the meeting place faster if you unseal me.”

  Lucian pushed his tongue against his cheek, thinking. Then, he wordlessly offered his hand. Aurelia took it happily, and then a few moments shifted to her divine beast form. She zoomed around for a bit as if glad to finally be strong once more, and then crouched low before Lucian. He got on.

  “Let’s hurry,” Lucian said. “Nervous wreck thinking about that eye being wasted, found, stolen, anything.”

  Aurelia didn’t need to be told twice.

  ***

  Lucian burst open the door to their meeting place—an abandoned farmstead he knew of—and many heads whipped to see him. Miriam stood, putting on her prosthetic quickly and limping over to him with a bright smile on her face.

  “Lucian!” She greeted, putting her hands on his shoulders. She studied him for wounds. “You really made it out of that place. I can’t believe it.”

  “Had a Belcourt Asheford problem,” Lucian said. “We overcame it.”

  “Lucian overcame it,” Aurelia said, walking in to sit down. “I’m afraid I was merely baggage.”

  She did look quite disgraceful compared to normal. Still, she’d done her part well enough, barring the escape portion. And… had everyone else?

  “Do you have it?” Lucian asked Miriam.

  Miriam reached into a pouch, undoing its clasp to open it. She pulled out yet another smaller pouch, and when she finally opened that the artifact was wrapped in a velvet cloth. Lucian beheld the Jeweled Eye. He picked it up. It looked like a galaxy in his fingers. Without delay, he popped it in his mouth.

  “Oh… was that…?” Miriam narrowed her eyes.

  Lucian swallowed. “No, I’m just storing it in a safer place. I’ll have to dig it out later.”

  Miriam looked a bit horrified, but Lucian couldn’t keep a straight face. When he started laughing, she walked away and facepalmed.

  “I thought it would be a bit more elegant than that,” Miriam said with a slight chuckle.

  “Not at all.” Lucian walked to the table in the center of the room. “Now, I just need to wait for it to activate. Shouldn’t be long.”

  “What are you actually getting?” Miriam asked. “We didn’t have time enough to discuss it last time.”

  “Something called Formless Essence,” Lucian said. “I’m uniquely well-positioned to take advantage of it. Frankly, I thought this was a pipe dream… but I guess I do get lucky after all.”

  It was a shame he couldn’t see the First Emperor seethe. Because that fool’s dream was about to become his.

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