“I am no bird; and no net ensnares me: I am a free human being with an independent will, which I now exert to leave you.” — Charlotte Bront?, Jane Eyre

  ???

  The soft chirping of crickets and the gentle hum of fireflies were the only sounds that accompanied Queen Lysandra, as she sat in the white gazebo of the Imperial Gardens, gazing at the famous rose bushes, as is her usual nightly routine.

  Her personal maid was quiet as she poured a fresh cup of jasmine tea for her, the fragrant steam curling into the air. She placed the cup beside a plate of chocolate scones, even as the queen had a book opened in front of her. But she hasn’t turned a page in over an hour.

  “Your Majesty, if I may?” Her maid’s voice was low, but also filled with concern. “Too much sugar isn’t good before bed.”

  Lysandra smiled at her. The maid had come with her from her maiden house of House Camden, along with her handmaidens, when she’d first married Edric and became the queen. “Don’t worry. I’ll only have one,” she reassured.

  The sound of boots on stone echoed faintly along the stone pathways of the Imperial Garden. Both Lysandra and her maid turned only to see one of the Crownsguards approaching. Lysandra recognised him immediately as the Crownsguard assigned to watch over Luca and Rem that day.

  “Halt,” Lysandra’s assigned Crownsguard stopped his colleague. “What business do you have with Her Majesty?”

  “It’s all right. I’m expecting a report from him,” Lysandra reassured. She looked at her maid. “You’re dismissed.”

  The maid bowed to her before leaving the gazebo and the Imperial Gardens. Finally, Lysandra turned to the Crownsguard, who was still standing outside the gazebo respectfully, politely waiting.

  “Have they already departed?” Lysandra enquired.

  The Crownsguard nodded. “Yes, Your Majesty. Lord Nightray and Heiress Nightray have left the Imperial City,” he reported. “The Crown Prince and Prince Rem have retired for the night. The nanny is with them now.”

  Lysandra nodded. “I see.” She was silent for several moments, gazing at her teacup and the plate of scones in front of her for several moments, before she looked up again. “I want your honest opinion,” she said at last, her dark blue eyes sharp. “You’ve observed my sons with Heiress Nightray today. I want your unfiltered thoughts.”

  The Crownsguard hesitated, visibly surprised. He looked at his colleague, who was now studying the leaves of a nearby tree with exaggerated interest, clearly pretending not to listen. He recognised the latter as Queen Lysandra’s regular guard in the Crownsguard, loyal to both her and the princes, more so than the king.

  “Whatever you say here will remain between us,” Lysandra promised, her voice steady. “I want the truth.”

  The Crownsguard hesitated before he exhaled. “Permission to speak freely, Your Majesty?” he enquired, and Lysandra nodded. “I noticed it the moment Heiress Nightray interacted with Prince Lucien. He smiled at her. Genuinely. Something that no one had been able to achieve in five years. Not even Prince Rem. And yet, Heiress Nightray managed it in less than an hour. By the time she had to leave, Prince Lucien was staring at her like she’d hung the moon and stars, and looked as if his world had come to an end when he was told she had to go home.”

  Lysandra smiled softly, trying to imagine her eldest son smiling and laughing. “Is that so? I wouldn’t be surprised if that will be the girl that Luca will marry in the future,” she mused.

  The Crownsguard’s eyes widened. And behind the queen, her personal guard made a sound that suspiciously resembled laughter before disguising it as a cough.

  Ignoring the reactions of the Crownsguards, Lysandra pressed further. “And what of Rem?”

  “He smiled, too. He was nervous around Heiress Nightray in the beginning, but he soon warmed up to her,” The Crownsguard revealed. “He laughed. Not the nervous little laugh that he does with the palace staff or tutors, but a real one. They acted like children for once. Like the five-year-olds they are. Not princes. Not royal heirs. Just…children.”

  There was silence for several long moments. Lysandra finally nodded. “That’s good, then,” she whispered.

  The Crownsguard standing in front of her shifted on his feet, hesitating, before his shoulders finally eased and he looked up, determination on his face. “If I may, Your Majesty?” he began. “Forgive me for speaking out of turn, but I’ve been guarding Prince Lucien and even Prince Rem since they both were infants. I understand it’s treason for a Crownsguard to question the king. But as a father myself, I can’t keep silent anymore. The way His Majesty treats Prince Lucien…” He trailed off slowly.

  Lysandra closed the book in front of her with a sigh. “…I’m aware,” she said at last. “Edric…doesn’t understand Luca. He doesn’t want to.” She said almost sadly. “We both knew this might happen, even before the twins were born. We both carry bloodlines from the Ten Great Houses. Edric was so proud of Luca when he was born, and the doctor confirmed his gift. But now… He listens too much to Minister Varence.”

  The Crownsguard frowned, his jaw tight. “With respect, Your Majesty, the Finance Minister has no place involving himself in matters beyond the royal budget,” he said hotly.

  “I agree,” Lysandra sighed. The Crownsguard aren’t the only ones concerned with the amount of trust that the king had placed in his Finance Minister. Far more than the king gave to Hamilton Nightray and Esmund Veranthal. His guardian and military advisor, as well as the royal advisor, respectively. “Luca is…special. A natural-born genius. He’s too perceptive for his own good. He’s intelligent. Too smart. Sees too much. Even hears too much. But the king… He’s a man of action. Of steel and command. And he fears Luca.” Lysandra smiled bitterly. “He fears what Luca hears when he looks at him. The thoughts that Edric keeps behind locked teeth, but never buried deeply enough.”

  “Then perhaps…” The Crownsguard began, but Lysandra shook her head.

  “He won’t change,” Lysandra said quietly. “And I fear for both Luca and Rem. For the one too soft-hearted to survive the game of politics that comes with noble and royal territory… And even for the one that is too sharp not to be hated by it.” She breathed deeply. “The Nightray heiress… She looked Luca in the eye and didn’t flinch. Even asked if she could come again. And even asked if Luca and Rem can visit Evershade someday.”

  Lysandra laughed. “Edric looked so shocked when she asked that. A feather could have knocked him over.” The Crownsguards—both of them, grinned. “She called Luca out like an equal. Treated him not as a prince, but as a normal boy. And perhaps that’s what he needs. For someone to look him in the eye and tell him what he’s doing wrong. Someone who sees him. Not the title. Not the gift. But just him.” Lysandra’s expression softened. “Like how Lord Hamilton used to be for Edric.”

  A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

  The Crownsguard hesitated, then nodded. “Maybe Heiress Nightray can be the ray of light for Prince Lucien. The one the rest of us couldn’t give him,” he admitted softly.

  Lysandra nodded, lifting her teacup. “I pray to the Goddess that Luca finds his own path. Not just as a prince of this country. But his own path, as Lucien von Aubere.”

  ???

  The warm glow of candlelight was the only source of illumination in the twin princes’ shared bedroom. As was her usual nightly routine before turning in, Eugenia Norman checked on the younger prince, ensuring that Prince Rem was asleep, warm and comfortable beneath his covers. His breathing was slow and even, and he clutched a stuffed bear in his arms.

  Despite it being well past his bedtime, however, Prince Lucien was still wide awake. He was already dressed in his pyjamas, but sat perched on the side of his bed on the other side of the room, his small feet swinging above the carpet. He seemed deep in thought, frowning slightly to himself.

  Eugenia smiled, sitting by Prince Lucien’s side. “Shouldn’t you turn in for the night soon, Your Highness?” she asked gently, but the Crown Prince only shrugged. “Did you have fun today?” She asked the prince, and Prince Lucien blinked up at her. “I’ve never seen you so at ease with anyone before. Not even Prince Rem.”

  Before Prince Lucien could answer, there was a soft knock on the door, and it creaked open. Standing in the doorway was Queen Lysandra, her steps almost silent as she entered the room.

  “Y-Your Majesty?” Eugenia blinked in surprise.

  “Can you leave us?” Lysandra asked, her voice calm. “You may turn in for the night.”

  Eugenia hesitated, looking at Prince Lucien before she nodded, rising to her feet. “Of course.” She curtsied to the queen and exited the room, looking over her shoulder with curiosity as she did so, before closing the door behind her.

  Lucien—Luca doesn’t look at his mother. He merely kept swinging his feet in silence, staring down at his feet as if seeing something fascinating. He didn’t look up even when Lysandra crossed the room silently, sitting next to her son.

  “Mother,” Luca said quietly.

  Lysandra’s heart nearly broke at the uncertainty in his voice. How many times had Luca and Rem truly seen their parents since their birth? They were mostly raised by the wet nurses and nannies. Even their tutors likely saw them more than Lysandra ever did, and she’s their mother.

  This is just how things are, a small voice spoke in her head. You know that the moment you accepted the engagement to Edric.

  And it was true. Even amongst the nobility, it was rare for a mother to be the one to nurse her own children, especially if she was the lady of the House. Lysandra only knew of a few noble houses that went against that norm. House Nightray was one of them. But sadly, poor Yuliana Nightray will never get to know her mother, who had passed away when she was just a baby, with the lady of the house giving her life to defend a village under House Nightray’s protection from bandits.

  Lord Hamilton never truly recovered from his lady’s demise. Unlike most noble unions, theirs had been a love match. House Nightray had never followed the norm when it came to their heirs and heiresses’ marriages, and had been more relaxed in their customs. Lord Hamilton’s father had allowed him to pick his own wife, and though he had lived long enough to see his son married, he hadn’t lived to witness the birth of his granddaughter.

  From what Lysandra had understood, the entire House had thrown a party the moment they knew that their lady was with child, and then another one on the day that their heiress was born.

  For being a noble House of assassins, they sure don’t act like it when off the clock. If there was another Great House as chaotic behind closed doors, it would be House Hunt.

  Luca looked up, startled, when the queen caressed Luca’s silver hair gently. Both twins had inherited her hair and eye colouring. But truthfully, even Lysandra admits to herself that Luca tends to take after her in more than just appearance.

  Her child. Her baby. Her eldest. Only five. And yet, he’s already carrying such a heavy burden on those small shoulders, and understands the ways of the world more than he already should.

  Lysandra remembers the first time that she’d held Luca in her arms. It would have been just after the twins were born, and the midwife proudly announced that Lysandra had two healthy boys.

  Even Edric was delighted, and had spent days smiling like a fool, especially when the royal doctor had confirmed that Luca possessed a gift, the first royal in generations to possess one, though Lysandra and Edric both knew that it might be a distinct possibility when they’d first learnt she was pregnant.

  Abilities were rare but not unheard of, and they normally manifested amongst the Ten Great Houses. Currently, Lysandra knew of only one other child with a confirmed gift: the D’Aragon heiress, a few years older than Luca, and already engaged to the second son of House Kael.

  But soon, Edric’s joy and pride over Luca turned into fear. He started looking at their firstborn like he was a curse, avoiding him like the plague. As if the very gift he once celebrated now threatened to undo everything.

  Lysandra wanted to be a mother to her children, but she is also the queen, and couldn’t disobey Edric. And thus, she stayed silent and kept her distance. But she had never stopped watching.

  She ensured that the Crownsguards assigned to the twins were loyal to their well-being above all else. She arranged for the palace kitchens to prepare the twins’ favourite dishes on special days. And here, Lysandra felt a big slap in her face when she had to ask the head chef what Luca and Rem’s favourite foods were when she had given that particular instruction.

  The head chef said nothing, but the judgmental look he had given Queen Lysandra when he was summoned to her said more than what words could.

  Despite everything, however, Lysandra had never stopped loving her sons. If there is a choice to be made between her king and her sons, her sons would be her first choice every single time.

  “Luca…” Lysandra sighed. She smoothed out the wrinkles in her gown, trying to act like it was a normal thing for her to do. Most mothers would visit their children every single night before they sleep. But for Lysandra, it had been a long time since she had done that.

  She hesitated, wondering what to say to her firstborn. What can she say, anyway?

  How was your day?

  Did you have fun?

  However that she phrased it, both questions sounded awkward even in her head.

  Next to her, Luca gave a slight tilt of his lips like he knew what she was thinking. And then again, he probably did.

  Lysandra cleared her throat, trying to break the awkward silence. “Did you enjoy yourself today?” she asked gently. “With the Nightray heiress? I believe her name is Yuliana?” She recalled something of that sort when Lord Hamilton had introduced his daughter to her and Edric earlier that day.

  And while Lysandra knew that Lord Hamilton had a daughter, as the royal court always does whenever an heir or heiress is born to one of the Great Houses, she had never met the child until today.

  Luca nods slowly, still not looking at Lysandra, but there was a faint smile in his voice. “She prefers Yulia,” he said simply. He then raised his head, meeting Lysandra’s eyes. For the first time in years, Lysandra saw joy in them. “She’s…different. Her mind’s quiet. When I’m with her, I can think. It doesn’t hurt. She says she can help teach me to shut it off. To control it. To not…hear.” He whispered the last part, his voice filled with hope.

  Lysandra smiled. “That’s wonderful, my love,” she said. “She sounds very special.” She brushed a strand of silver hair from Luca’s forehead. “She’ll be a good friend to you. A lifelong companion. A shield and a sword.” She murmured. She had hoped Luca might find a friend when she persuaded Edric to arrange the meeting with the Nightray heiress. Thank the Goddess that it worked out. “Someone who will tell you what you need to hear, rather than what you want to hear. Someone who will never guide you wrong. Like Lord Hamilton was to your father.”

  Luca looked doubtful at that comparison, but he said nothing.

  Lysandra grimaced. While Luca and Rem would still be too young to be involved in the affairs of the court, it is not a big secret amongst the Imperial Palace that the once close friendship that King Edric had shared with Lord Hamilton had frayed.

  Hamilton Nightray is still a loyal subject of the realm. But he had mostly handed over the protection duties of the king to the Crownsguard, mostly serving Edric in his role as the Imperial Palace’s military advisor and the Black Ops commander. And even so, Lysandra had been hearing whispers amongst the soldiers that the king hardly ever takes Lord Hamilton’s advice any longer. Not like how he used to. And it wasn’t just Lord Hamilton either, but also Lord Esmund, the royal advisor.

  “Someday… When you’re both a little older, she’ll be by your side,” Lysandra said at last. “She’ll be someone you can trust more than anyone else.” She swallowed a lump in her throat. “Even more than your family.”

  She brushed off silver curls from Luca’s forehead, pressing a light kiss against his forehead—a rare act of affection that startled the small boy for a moment, and causing guilt to wreck through Lysandra’s frame once more.

  “It’s getting late. Lie down now. You’ll be too tired for your lessons tomorrow, otherwise,” Lysandra said, trying to sound cheerful.

  Luca didn’t protest, crawling beneath his covers, as Lysandra tucked the blankets around his shoulders, just as she used to when he was a baby, and the world still felt full of light and hope.

  “Mother?” Luca murmured. “Why does Father hate me?” Lysandra’s breath hitched. And for several moments, she has no idea what to say. “I saw the way Lord Hamilton was with Yulia today. He looks at her. Talks to her. He didn’t ignore her. He watched her like she mattered. Why doesn’t Father do that with me?” Luca blinked up at Lysandra, confused. “Why does Father hate me?” He asked again. “I don’t understand.”

  Luca’s confusion and sadness in his voice almost broke Lysandra’s heart. She wanted to lie to him. Tell Luca that it isn’t true. That Edric does love him. But she couldn’t bring herself to say the words. Even if she does, Luca will know that she’s lying. He always knew when someone lied to him, even without his gift.

  Lysandra sighed, gently stroking Luca’s hair, trying to coax him to sleep. “Oh, baby…” she murmured. She closed her eyes briefly, trying to find the right words to say. “It’s not your fault. You did nothing wrong.” Luca’s eyes are blinking slowly now, slowly being lulled to sleep. “It’s going to be okay. I promise.”

  Lysandra continued sitting by Luca’s bedside for several minutes, stroking his hair, waiting until he was fully asleep before she got to her feet, crossing the room and opening the door. She looked over her shoulder at her sons before she left.

  Luca and Rem.

  Twins born on the same day. But yet, destined for different fates.

  Lysandra closed the door quietly behind her, meeting the eyes of the Crownsguard guarding the twins for the night. “Watch over them,” she said.

  “With my life, Your Majesty,” The Crownsguard swore, one fist over his chest.

  Lysandra never doubted it.