Life was a terrible thing.

  The more she wanted it, the harder it was to get.

  To live, she needed food. For food, she needed money. And for money, she had to risk her life.

  She had to collect the fruits from a tall tree; fetch water from an old well; search the mountains for herbs; search for a lost shoe te at night; catch crawfish in the river; and when she was most desperate, wander alone in the forests to hunt whatever she could.

  It was with a stubborn defiance that she came back home, every single time.

  But it was all useless.

  No matter how hard she tried, no matter how many times she held hands with Death, all her efforts couldn’t compensate Mother for a single bite of food.

  She was useless.

  Not long after, Mother went somewhere for a very long time, and when she came back, she stared at her with a strange look.

  She didn’t know if she liked that look or hated it, for it made goosebumps crawl up her skin, yet each time her mother wore that look she was treated a little better.

  That look made her mother kinder.

  Her meals became heartier; her soup had more meat; and one day, her mother gave her a pair of silver earrings.

  It was a fine, expensive thing made with real white jade and silver. Fashioned into little clusters of lily flowers, the weight of it was heavy and real in her little fingers.

  ‘There was a generous man today,’ her mother said. ‘Wear it, if you’d so like.’

  But she couldn’t.

  Her ears weren’t pierced.

  So she just thanked her mother with a smile.

  *

  She really, really loved that pair of earrings, but even she knew that they were expensive, worth a lot of money. The next day she asked for an appraisal — if it was worth a lot, perhaps it could support them for a bit.

  Most of the jewellers lied to her, saying it was a fake, and offered to buy it at a low price. Only one told her of its real value — the jades and silver made it worth nearly three gold taels, enough to feed her and Mother for six months with good food and board.

  ‘You’ll have to come back tomorrow ss,’ the man said. ‘I don’t have that much on me right now.’

  She shook her head with a smile. ‘It’s nothing! Don’t worry, I’ll come back tomorrow,’ she promised.

  The man waved her away.

  She ran home, back to the shed through the winding roads and thin alleyways. Back at the restaurant, her mother was already preparing herself for bed; she opened the door and slid in, the silver earrings clenched in her hands.

  Then there was a knock at the door.

  Mother went to open it as she peeked at the visitor from the hay and clutter.

  ‘You remember me, right?’ It was a man standing there at the door; he had a roundness to him, like a giant, water-filled ball, a mb stomach that was filled with soup. ‘My offer.’

  ‘…She’ll live a good life, right?’

  ‘Yes.’ He handed her mother a roll of paper, ‘My mistress is a good woman. If your daughter comes with us, she’ll live in the p of luxury — eat white rice, dress in silk, and py with jewels for marbles.’

  Quiet. ‘Really?’

  ‘Really.’ The man offered, ‘Would you like me to read the contract aloud for you?’ His silk-wrapped belly shook like a pudding. ‘If you’re worried, count each word and see if it matches with the number of characters.’

  Her mother looked down at the paper with weak, almost zy arms. ‘Don’t. Just tell me the terms… the work my daughter will do.’

  ‘Alright.’ He took a breath and said, ‘She’ll be sold as a sve to the Peach House, and your gambling debt of two hundred gold taels will be dismissed. Her freedom will be returned the moment she pays back that sum, and we’ll cover her costs for training and education. Due to the House’s nature of work, she will start paying back her sve price once she turns fifteen —’

  She got up and shoved her way to them. ‘Mother.’ She looked up at their stiff faces. ‘What are you doing?’

  ‘Child. You’ll be —’

  ‘She’s giving you a better future,’ the man said. ‘You’ll become a courtesan, little girl. In just a few years of work, you can earn tenfold of your sve price, not to mention live a life of luxury. Aren’t you excited? And if you so wish, once your sve price is repaid, you’ll be free.’

  That was truly something amazing.

  Something too good.

  ‘You said you’ll cover my training and education,’ she said, ‘but what about my living space? Food and drink? And what about clothing? Courtesans must wear gossamer silk and jewels; will you pay for that? Or —’

  The man’s face stiffened.

  ‘You’ll make me borrow money.’ She hissed, ‘You don’t pn to set me free. For whatever money I earn, you’ll find a way to make me fall into debt!’ She snatched the contract out of her mother’s hands, the other’s eyes widening. ‘I’m not doing that. I won’t do it!’

  The man’s face twisted with anger. ‘You!’ He reached out to grab her —

  She tore herself away and ran, coming to a stop some space away. ‘Mother!’ Panting, she called, ‘Let’s just run away, that debt doesn’t matter. We can — we can go to the countryside. Can’t we become farmers?’

  Her mother didn’t speak.

  ‘…Ma,’ she called. ‘Ma. I just —’

  ‘Don’t call me that,’ the woman said. ‘I told you before.’ She turned away. ‘And you should follow him. You’ll have a better life as a courtesan than with me, anyway.’

  The girl froze.

  She stumbled a few steps back.

  ‘Ma,’ she asked, ‘do you like carp?’

  Confusion flitted across her mother’s face. ‘…I don’t. Why —?’

  She turned and ran.

  The cold air burned in her lungs, the worn soles on her feet thudding on the ground with each step. She ripped the contract to pieces as she ran, yellow-bck shreds flying through the air in a storm of autumn leaves.

  Everything —

  She left it behind.

  Her feet flew, the wind ripping past her face, a burn in her lungs and stinging in her eyes. That alleyway fell back, far away, and the bustling streets swallowed her as she fled —

  She smmed into someone.

  Yelping, she rolled to a stop, left sprawling on the ground. The people she’d jostled cursed and kicked back — pain blossomed across her body.

  She pushed herself up and found a woman staring back down at her.

  The woman wore a bck beizi coat, the bottom embroidered with luan birds trampling snakes. She had a severe face, one without softness or kindness in those high cheekbones, but the girl felt no fear.

  Those eyes held no disdain, disgust, or strange pity.

  It held… indifference.

  ‘Madam,’ she asked, ‘are you wanting of a sve?’

  Ahrihn