EXTERIOR- Ruttford, moderately poputed mining town near a deep and rich ravine. Currently standing in front of a particurly dark and particurly stout building, with the words 'Eat s**t and die' carved into the door.
PRESENT- THE BOY (cospying as the girl, except for the fact that the hat has the word 'BUG' glued to it), SOME RANDOM OLD GUY (currently ying against the building, looking real messed up)
TIME- Nearing the beginning of the ending portion of midday.
The man’s eyes were cold and dazed, his head limp, and his legs extended outward, reaching almost to the road. Passerby did not seem keen on acknowledging his existence.
Historically, old men in messy, patchy robes covered in filth provided the boy with useful information. This was true the one other time he’d spoken with one, anyway. The boy needed more data to verify if this was consistent.
“you. do you know where things are in this town?” The boy asked, as he had many times before.
“Eh? Hueh..?” The old man murmured, blinking thrice, his body suddenly jolting after the third blink. “HUEEEH?? WHERE IN THE ABYSS DID YOU CRAWL OUT FROM, BOY?!” He shouted, as a number of passerby on the road shivered and obviously averted their eyes.
“i do not know what that is. but i did climb out of a hole.” The boy was ever helpful.
“Hm…” The man nodded. “I see. Good business, that.”
“what?” The boy tilted his head.
“Holes.”
“how so?”
“’s good.”
“noted.” The boy realized he should really get back on track. “can you tell me what or where terrible henrys is?”
“. . .” The man slowly raised a messy gray eyebrow, which was inexplicably den with crumbs. “Y’serious, boy? Ye screwin’ with me?”
“i do not believe so.” The boy wasn’t too familiar with metaphors, but he was 99% confident there was no screwing involved.
“Hmmm…” The man squinted.
. . .
And stared at the boy in silence for some time.
. . .
“. . .”
“…”
“-“
“Aaaaaalright, I’ll tells ya.” The man had a glint in his eye, as he scratched his messy, bearded chin.
“thank y-“
He held up two fingers. “But only for three gold pieces!”
“i do not have any.”
“… Aye. I see.” The man put his hand down slowly.
He soon raised it again, along with his other, as if holding an invisible box about the width of the boy’s head in front of him. “To the north of this pce is a small river. You must head there, and retrieve for me a fish of the bluest scales, no smaller than this. Go with haste, boy, the night will fall before ye know it…”
“okay. how do i do that?” Boy head tilt.
“. . .” The man squints some more. “Actually, ye don’t look like the fishin’ type.”
“oh.”
“Hmm…” He put his hands down.
. . .
He raised his right hand, and points out into the street.
“Tell her to f**k off.” He pointed squarely at a tall woman with bright blue eyes and crimson red hair in a ponytail. She was cd in brilliantly shining pte armor, with a glistening long sword in a glowing scabbard by her side, and she was surrounded by about 3 other people who also had unique character designs. They were all walking down the road, and just happened to be passing by.
“okay.”
The boy returned to the street and approached the small group.
“tall woman with red hair.” He tilted his head up and spoke as he neared.
She1 turned her gaze down towards him with the mildest of surprise. Her travelling companions did not contribute anything to the following conversation. “Hm? What’s up, kiddo?” She raised an eyebrow. “And why’s your hat say ‘Bug’ on it?”
She was the first person to acknowledge that.
“it believe it is my name.” The boy was ever helpful. “also, a man told me to tell you to f**k off.”
The woman’s expression fell ft.
“Was it that guy over there?” She pointed at that guy.
“yes it was.” Just, so helpful.
“I hate that guy.” She squinted.
“shall i tell him that?”
“He knows.”
A moment ter, the woman and her crew walked away.
The boy returned to the man.
“i did it.”
“Aye. It was awesome.” The man bore a brilliant, yellowed-toothy grin.
“can you tell me where or what terrible henrys is now?”
“Aye.” The man nodded. “’Tis here.”
“... this building? the one you are leaning on?” The boy inquired with another head tilt.
“Aye. Normally I’m paid to be gross and old and smelly and weird to get people to go away, but I think it’d be really funny to let someone like you in. So, 'ere it is. Head on in.”
“i see.” The boy did not ask for any of that information, but was grateful for it regardless. “thank you.”
“Aye.” The man let his body go limp once more, and his eyes began to gze. “Also, ‘tis a push door, despite appearances. If you try to pull ‘er open…”
“…what?”
The man was unresponsive.
"what happens?"
The boy tried a number of things to reawaken him, but the gze had once again overtaken his eyes, and the man was entirely unresponsive.
In truth, though, he was fully conscious. He just thought it’d be funny to pretend that he isn’t.
What a guy.
