This takes pce after the end of S1, however I’m publishing it before S1 is over. A little bit of spoilers for S1 but you can enjoy it without much knowledge of the rest of the story. Now, I hope you enjoy and happy holidays!Jimmithey Johnrey James was lying down on a crappy piss-stained mattress. This had been his bed for the st few months, now that he was an apprentice of the powerful Master Bater.

  Master Bater is the most powerful martial artist teacher and practitioner in the world. He was respected by many around the world, and is seen as the pinnacle of technique and training.

  But, despite his wisdom and fame, he is currently a hobo who lives in the middle of the city’s quickly growing homeless parks.

  Even with the time being two in the afternoon, Jimmithey was lying in his bed. He was told by his teacher to sleep for training early that morning, something that pissed off the Schizo.

  Jimmithey slightly stretched his leg out to the side, bumping it into a rock-hard leg that rested nearby. When he did, he turned his head reflexively, now staring at the man next to him.

  “Watch where you’re touching, dumbass! Fuck, man... I could’ve been spending time with Myusel, in my fucking manor! But I’m stuck in a cardboard hut, cold as shit, with your fruity ass!” The Alpha male named Chad yelled as he pulled his rag of a bnket over himself.

  This man was Chad Thompson, Jimmithey’s long-term rival and the hero who was credited for saving the world alongside Ms. Milly and the strongest Magical Girl Hoshino.

  Despite once trying to kill Jimmithey, both hating him and what he represented, Chad had put aside his differences to train under the legendary Master Bater with him. But even with that, they both hated each other’s guts.

  “Well, I wish I was at home with my family. But you don’t see me whining like a bitch.” Jimmithey replied, turning his body back around. Chad stayed silent, feeling too sore to respond. After a long day of training early in the morning, both of them were tired beyond belief.

  They both closed their eyes, their minds beginning to drift off into sleep. And so, they fell asleep on that cold Christmas Eve afternoon.

  But that sleep didn’t st very long. Both men were awakened by a strange noise coming from outside the tent.

  RING RING! RING RING!

  They both heard loud ringing and jingling bells coming from outside their hut. Curious about the origin of the noise, Jimmithey began to get out of his mattress. Chad kept lying down, trying to ignore the noise.

  But right as Jimmithey got onto his feet, two hooves smmed through the cardboard hut, gripping onto Jimmithey and Chad’s tracksuits!

  “!?!” They were both pulled out by the hard hooves, the cardboard hut breaking into pieces. They both smmed onto the hard concrete floor, nding on their feet at the st second.

  They both turned around, their heads twisting to see what had just happened. But as they turned around, they were met by a sight that would forever be ingrained in their minds.

  “The fuck?!” The two roared as they looked ahead. In front of them was a massive, half-naked, brown reindeer with a small gray beard and a rge red nose.

  It was 9 feet tall and had a massive bulge on its crotch, held back by a tiny red Speedo. On its head were rge sharp antlers, each poking into the sky.

  “What the fuck am I looking at?!” Jimmithey yelled as he stared at the reindeer’s massive bulge. He was frozen still from shock.

  Chad, on the other hand, instantly jumped at the reindeer man and punched it in the face! The deer was pushed back slightly, the concrete under its feet shattering.

  It quickly hopped into the air and kicked Chad in the chest with both of its legs, sending him flying off into a nearby building!

  “Fucking asshole!” Chad yelled as he rested on the side of a brick building, rubble falling onto his face. Right as he prepared to jump at the creature, he quickly noticed it hold up both of its hoofs in surrender.

  “Listen to me, Jimmithey Johnrey James. You too, Chad Thompson. I am not here to fight, for I know you two great heroes would beat me.” The Reindeer man expined, a droplet of blood leaking out from his mouth.

  “How does he know about me?” Jimmithey muttered to himself, remembering the fact that Milly had purposefully kept Jimmithey a secret. Both to keep him safe from freaks like the Reindeer man and so he could live his normal life.

  “At least you know your pce, you fuck. But if you aren’t here to fight, then why the hell are you here?! And why the fuck are you attacking us while we’re trying to sleep!” Chad yelled as he hopped down from the side of the building, dusting himself off as he nded on the ground.

  The Reindeer put his hands down and crouched to the side, pulling his muscur hoof to the nearby snow. He pulled what seemed to be a note out of it and stood back up, beginning to walk towards the Schizo right after.

  "My name is Rudolf, Red-Nosed Rudolf. I have been sent by Santa D. Cus, Father Christmas, to call you for help. We are desperate for assistance. We've been facing issues with giving gifts because of the fiend named Krampus' return. We need the strongest fighters imaginable, so we’ve come looking for you. You two have beaten the King Cuck, so we know your strength." Red-Nosed Rudolf expined as he bowed down to Jimmithey.

  “How do you know about me then? Chad’s famous but my involvement in the war is supposed to be a secret.” Jimmithey asked curiously, crossing his arms.

  “Yeah! How do you know about this pleb?!” Chad asked as he pointed at the Reindeer.

  “Father Christmas knows all of those with noble hearts. He may not give presents or coal to adults, but he does recognize respectable people and gives them luck. Now, will you join our cause and save Christmas?” Rudolf expined, holding out his hoof for a ‘handshake.’

  Jimmithey was preparing to respond but was interrupted by a powerful yell!

  "Santa ain't real, motherfucker!" An old voice from behind roared.

  They turned and saw the legendary Master Bater walking up to them. He wore an old green sweater with a scratched-out drawing of a Christmas tree.

  Rudolf started ughing in response to the comment, spping his knee with his hard hoof.

  "You aren't a believer, eh? You must've gotten coal when you were young. But, forget about such nonsense. I need your help or Christmas will be doomed. Please, all of you!" Rudolf yelled as he got on his knees and started begging, getting into position in a few seconds.

  Jimmithey turned to Chad and Master Bater, who had gathered around the begging Rudolf.

  "Chad, Master, I think we should help him. If this can save Christmas and let children get gifts, then I'm all for it. Seeing that Santa is real and all…" Jimmithey said as the realization of Santa’s existence sunk into his head. He quickly accepted it, realizing that he had experienced weirder things before.

  As he about thought this, Chad began to nod his head in agreement. He stroked his rge chiseled chin and chuckled slightly, pointing down at Jimmithey.

  "I agree with the bitch. When I have a son with my loving wife, Mysuel, I want him to be able to enjoy the joy of Christmas Day. If it's my fault that he can't enjoy that beautiful feeling, then I would be devastated." Chad replied as he brought his hand down, lifting Rudolf by the arm.

  Rudolf shook both of their hands, a rge grin appearing on his deer face. But as they celebrated the team-up, they were quickly interrupted by Master Bater's roaring.

  "Fuck that! Like I said, Santa ain't real! This fucking weird bitch is just a scammer! Just go back to bed and get ready for tomorrow’s training, aight?!" Master Bater yelled as he started to turn around, walking back into his nearby cardboard hut.

  “Oh wow. What an unjolly man.” Rudolf muttered as he crossed his muscur arms. Jimmithey and Chad turned to each other and sighed.

  They did not want to spend Christmas with the old smelly Master Bater. Besides, it could've been good training to fight some real enemies instead of just fighting each other or training dummies.

  "Rudolf, ignore that old bastard. We'll help you out. But, quick question. How are we going to get to Santa? Doesn't he live in the North Pole?" Jimmithey asked Rudolf, his eyebrows raised upwards.

  The big reindeer started ughing, spping his hoof on his leg once again. He then pulled out a tiny device from his behind. Chad was concerned whether Rudolf kept it in his ass crack.

  The device he pulled was an iPhone 4 and it was cracked to shit. The deer began to tap on its screen, bringing it up to his ears.

  "I'm gonna call up the other reindeer. They're going to pick us up and take us to Santa. AKA, the North Pole. It's around 2:30 PM, so we don't have too much time. Besides, some time zones aren’t getting their gifts yet!" Rudolf expined as he tapped on his cracked ass phone.

  Then, in less than a few seconds, a bunch of jingling sounds began ringing out in the air. Jimmithey and Chad turned their heads up, seeing a bunch of muscur reindeer flying down. They held up a rge sled behind themselves, nding perfectly in the homeless camp.

  Across this massive sled were hundreds of green and red bells. The sled was ordained with gold, giving it a fantastical atmosphere and vibe.

  A rge seat sat in the middle of it, and behind it was a rge space for presents. A space in front of it had a smaller seat meant for the sled driver.

  "Hop on, my friends! We’ve got Christmas to save!" Rudolf yelled as he ran to the side of the sleds, opening up the two rge doors.

  “Holy hell! This man Santa got a nice ride! Great fucking leather…” Chad ughed as he walked on the rge sled, analyzing the quality of the seats. He quickly spread his legs, covering the entire space with his chiseled thighs.

  “Dude… Move over!” Jimmithey shouted as he walked up the sled’s support stairs. Chad chuckled and closed his eyes, still keeping his legs spread out far and wide.

  “Dickhead…” Jimmithey muttered to himself as he sat in the limited seating space. He was completely squished on the sled’s left side!

  In front of the boys, the Red-Nosed Rudolf sat in the front driver seat. As he did, he put on a pair of goggles and a nice warm beanie, which rested on his furry face. He turned his head toward the two passengers, grabbing the reins with his hooves.

  "Put on your seat belts, fels. This sled can go at speeds of 100k MPH, so you'll probably die if you fall off." Rudolf expined as he put on his seat belt at the front of the sled.

  Jimmithey started putting on the seatbelt, scared by the Deer’s warning. In contrast, Chad sat still and started ughing!

  "Seatbelt? Do I look like a bitch, Red-Nosed Rudolf?! I don't wear that pussy shit!" Chad yelled as he ripped the belt off of the chair, spreading his legs further.

  Jimmithey and Rudolf sighed silently, accepting that Chad wouldn’t listen to common sense.

  Rudolf then spped the reins down, signaling to his fellow reindeer that it was time to fly off. They began running forward, kicking off the ground with incredible strength.

  BOOOM!!

  A sonic boom went off as they bsted into the sky, pushing the clouds that rested in the air away.

  But because of this powerful flight, the whole park was blown with wind! The homeless people’s huts were toppled over, flying off into the wind! That included Master Bater’s small abode, which had been ripped to shreds.

  "Fuckin' dumbasses!!!" Master Bater shouted as he looked around at the surrounding wreckage, stomping his foot onto the ground in rage.

  …

  Meanwhile, Chad and Jimmithey were bsting off into the sky with the reindeer. They both held themselves down onto the sled, using their full force to stay still! The winds were that strong and ferocious, pushing them back into the chair and pulling them out of the sled.

  They had already left their city and were on another continent in seconds! Suddenly, the sled slowed down, the rushing wind disappearing. With his incredible skill, Rudolf expertly nded the sled on a random snowy mountain, parking it on a runway of smooth ice.

  “Seems we’re here now. Good flight if I’d say so myself.” Rudolf chuckled as he took off his pilot goggles and hat. He stood out of the sled and stretched his back, sighing in joy.

  "Kofff! I-I think a f-fucking bird flew into my mouth... It's c-cold as shit too!" Jimmithey coughed as he got off of the sled. He stood on his knees, still coughing out.

  He shivered, quickly grabbing his shoulder to warm himself up. Right as he did this, he felt Chad smack the back of his head.

  “The fuck!?” Jimmithey coughed out, nearly falling onto the cold snow.

  "Pussy. It's warm as hell here!" Chad ughed out as he began stretching his forearms. Suddenly, he then began undressing and was now shirtless!

  “...” Jimmithey shook his head, standing back up. He ignored Chad and started looking at the surroundings around him. He could only see snow and trees, a seemingly barren and empty wastend.

  "Fels, welcome to the North Pole. Beautiful, isn’t it?" Rudolf ughed as he pointed towards a nearby mansion that Jimmithey hadn’t noticed beforehand.

  It was covered with snow and surrounded by birch trees. There were small candy canes and decorations over the brown wood and gray stones that made up the house. It was festive and peaceful, giving light to the desote North Pole.

  "Is this where Santa lives?" Chad asked as he pulled down his pants, revealing his boxers.

  Rudolf pulled out his shitty iPhone 4 and pressed some buttons. This led to the ground under them sinking and moving downwards!

  “Woah!” Jimmithey yelled as he saw them enter a mechanical elevator, surrounded by lights and machinery. Rudolf ate a carrot he found off the sled as they went down.

  "Yes, Chad. This is where Santa and his worker elves live and do operations. But thanks to Krampus, work has been slowing down! We'll meet with Santa as soon as we get past the factory." Rudolf expined as the elevator went down, finishing the carrot in a few bites.

  They reached the bottom and saw tons of elves cleaning up and working on conveyor belts. It was a massive factory, filled with steam and machinery that produced presents.

  These said presents were sent to piles of other wrapped presents. The worker elves then organized them, each wearing jolly, green and red clothing.

  But there were a ton of empty spaces on the supply lines. The elves there were working at incredible speeds, their faces looking incredibly tired.

  "Damn... Are these fools paid?" Chad asked as he looked at the Elves, following Rudolf and Jimmithey along an overlooking walkway. He noticed chains on the worker elves’ legs.

  "Santa's love is enough payment for us. Anyways, we are now here." Rudolf replied as they walked towards a little room on the side of the factory.

  It overlooked the rest of the factory, which gave it a powerful presence. Once they reached the high room, Rudolf held his hoof to the door and opened it.

  But as soon as he did, a bottle of half-drunk whiskey flew straight at Jimmithey! He quickly caught it with his hand in time, looking down at it confused.

  "F--ffFUCK!! R-ruDOLF. KID! Get me MORE Alchohol!!! HIC- NOW BITCH!! GODDAMN IT! HOHO!!" A half-naked old man yelled across the room.

  He was sitting in a giant red chair in front of a firepce and was surrounded by alcohol and drugs! His fat gut protruded, covered by sticky syrup and crumbs. On top of the elder’s head was a rge red hat that had a small white pom pom at the end of it.

  JImmithey was confused for a few seconds but quickly realized who the hell this man was.

  "Is that fucking Santa?! Why does he look so pathetic?" Chad asked as he looked around the room. Smashed bottles were all across the room and piss stains covered the floor. Half-eaten boxes of ice cream and festive cookies lined up the ground.

  Rudolf turned to Chad, shaking his head at the same time. A singur tear dropped down from his sparkling brown eyes.

  "Ever since the divorce with Ms. Cus… Mr. Santa has not been the same. It's all Krampus' fault..." Rudolf expined as he wiped his tears away.

  He walked towards Santa and picked him up by the shoulder, helping him stand up from his festive chair.

  "HIC- R-rudolf... Who are these m-motherfuckers... HOHO...!" Santa asked as he drunkenly pointed at Chad and Jimmithey. Rudolf cleared his throat and began expining.

  "These are Jimmithey Johnrey James and Chad Thompson. They are the two men who beat the King Cuc-" Rudolf began to say. But before he could finish, Santa started screaming and crying!

  He fell on the floor and smmed his fists on the ground, shaking the entire facility for a second.

  "D-DON'T SAY THAT WORD!! DON’T! D-DON'T SAY C-C-CUCK!!! HO-HO!!" He yelled as he kept bawling, snot flowing onto his massive white beard.

  "Rudolf, why is he afraid of the 'C-word'?" Jimmithey asked as he looked at the pathetic old Santa.

  Rudolf sighed and moved them out of the room. When they left, he closed the door and began to expin the story.

  "Santa is a busy man. He has to prepare presents throughout the entire year just for Christmas Eve. He has to collect all of the wishes and schedule everything just for this one day. So Ms. Cus is alone most of the time. This leads to her, you know, getting lonely. Both sexually and emotionally. And Krampus used this as an opportunity…" Rudolf expined as he pulled out a handkerchief from his behind. He began tearing up and wiped away his tears, calming himself down.

  "So… One day, when Mr. Cus came back home from work… He went to his bedroom to sleep. But… when he entered, he saw Krampus fucking Ms. Cus from the back..."

  "But, when he saw this sight, he could only watch! He didn't stop Krampus and instead watched by the doorway! I’ve heard rumors from the other reindeer that he was erect the whole time… But I refuse to believe that part… When Krampus was done, he saw Santa and attacked him, smming him onto the bedroom floor! Santa was forced to watch his wife look down at him in disgust, leaving with Krampus! Ever since that day, Ms. Cus has been with that bastard and Santa has made no progress on his work... He's lost his Christmas power, the energy that allows him to lead his Elves… And Krampus has gained all of it, nearly becoming the Father of Christmas himself…" Rudolf expined as he began sobbing hard, nearly falling onto the floor with tears.

  "Sad… How tragic. Reminds me of a certain bitch I know." Chad commented as he side-eyed Jimmithey.

  "Fuck off. Uh, anyways, Rudolf. What do you want us to do now? You should've called a therapist or some shit a while back." Jimmithey asked, shrugging his shoulders.

  Rudolf was about to answer, but the door behind them suddenly smmed open. Light flowed from the door, revealing a wide silhouette.

  "We're going to Krampus and we're going to fucking kill him! I'll get my honor and my Christmas powers back! Now come on, you're helping me. HOHO!!" Santa ughed out as he walked from the room.

  He now wore his normal red robe and was cleaned up from earlier. He was muscur and had a fat and powerful gut, the ideal build for any old man.

  “Mr. Cus! You’re back to normal again!” Rudolf chuckled, a rge grin appearing on his face.

  “Goddamn right, Rudolf! I’m feeling better cause we got a fucking Krampus to kill! HOHO!” Santa roared out as he flexed his old man muscles.

  They quickly followed him as he walked away from the room. They all strolled through the long walkways overlooking the elves.

  These said elves looked up at Santa, seeing his former glory return. They began cheering, working harder than they ever did before.

  But as they followed Santa, Chad quickly got pissed off and caught up to the legend, looming over him.

  "Hey hey hey! You can't fucking order me around! Besides, old man, what’s even your pn?!" Chad yelled as he grabbed Santa's shoulder, still being wary of Saint Nick.

  "Hoho… The pn is that we fuckin’ kill him by striking his base directly. You get Christmas back and I get my powers and job back. Alright? Isn't that why Rudolf called you?" Santa responded, satisfying Chad for a few moments.

  He walked to another door at the edge of the factory, pulling out a Christmas tree key. He pced it into the door, opening it up quickly.

  Inside the room were massive weapons racks. They were filled with guns and bombs, most of them being Christmas themed.

  Santa grabbed equipment from the side, pulling a shoulder and back strap filled with ammunition. He then pulled out a bazooka and a few grenades from the rack, pcing it on his straps.

  "Santa, will you start delivering presents if we kill Krampus? If so, I'm in." Jimmithey asked as they watched Santa strap himself up.

  “Yeah… I agree with this fuck. We came halfway across the world to help your ass for a reason.” Chad chuckled as they saw Santa press a nearby button.

  This button slid the weapons racks to the side, opening up a door to Santa’s Sled, an even rger and more impressive version of the one Rudolf had ridden earlier. The same muscur reindeer were connected to the sled, cheering for their empowered leader’s return.

  Santa reached the sled and sat down on the front, holding the reins in his hands. He looked straight into Jimmithey and Chad’s eyes, a rge grin appearing on his bearded face.

  "Good sonnys, cause I will get back to this Christmas business once we get the job done! HOHO! Rudolf, get in the riding positions. We're going to Detroit, home of the Krampus." Santa yelled as he began powering up his Sled!

  “Yes, Father Christmas! Let’s save this jolly holiday!” Rudolf cheered as he pced a carrot in each of the reindeer’s mouths. He then hopped onto the sled, setting calibrations up from behind.

  The few unchained elves began changing positions to set up the sled's unching, fueling it up. The power began to turn on, causing steam to rush out.

  The hatch door above them opened up, causing wind and snow to fly upwards. Along with that, the ptform they were on rose upwards, allowing for the sled to fly off.

  "Detroit? Why the fuck is he there? I thought he was European…" Jimmithey asked as he got onto the sled. Chad quickly followed, taking a position next to Rudolf and spreading his legs.

  "It's the most dangerous pce for Santa to go. The streets are now filled with naughty people, mainly because Krampus has made it his home. He feeds off their misery and spreads it even further, making them naughty!" Rudolf expined, crossing his jacked arms.

  “He’s tarnishing fucking Detroit’s name? What a bastard…” Chad responded, crossing his even more jacked arms.

  Jimmithey ignored them and put on his seat belt, remembering the uncomfortableness he felt the st time he went on one of their sleds.

  The sled began to rise upwards, causing blue fire and dust to rush out under them. The reindeer began kicking up into the air, allowing for the sled to rise upwards.

  "SANTA IS BACK, YOU NAUGHTY FUCKS!! HOHOHO!!!" Santa yelled as he spped the reins, causing the deer to rush as fast as they could.

  The sled left the North Pole, breaking the sound barrier. It bsted off back to America, leaving the frosty North Pole behind!